Mandela or Jell-O?

I follow several Gen X-themed accounts and pages on social media, and a recurring topic of conversation among members of my generation is the Mandela Effect. The Mandela Effect is the phenomenon of shared false memories among large groups of unconnected people.

Sometimes the Mandela Effect is truly weird. For instance, why do so many of us — me included — remember the Monopoly mascot wearing a monocle, the Fruits of the Loom spilling out of a cornucopia, and the comedian Sinbad playing a genie in a nonexistent film called Shazam? (I can explain the first two rationally, but that last one is just bizarre. I have a specific visual memory of that nonexistent tape at the video store, and I don’t know why.)

Other times, things that are described as the Mandela Effect have obvious explanations. For instance, there is nothing strange or sinister about people thinking the Berenstain Bears were called the “Berenstein” Bears; it’s just a spelling error created by the human instinct to adjust an anomaly to fit an expected pattern.

One example of the Mandela Effect that’s been making the rounds again this week is the widespread belief that Ed McMahon used to run around handing out checks for Publishers Clearing House.

This one isn’t the Mandela Effect so much as the Jell-O Effect: If the brand name of a new product is catchier than the generic term for that product, the brand name will become the colloquial term for all similar products subsequently introduced in that category. This is why all fruit-flavored gelatin, regardless of brand, is Jell-O; all red plastic cups sold at keggers are Solo cups; all disposable snotrags are Kleenexes; and, yes, all direct-mail sweepstakes are Publishers Clearing House. American Family Publishing — the company McMahon actually represented — was a Johnny-come-lately with a longer name that we couldn’t be arsed to remember, because we didn’t care.

A lot of people my age like to cite an episode of The Golden Girls as evidence that McMahon actually did work for PCH and that some mysterious overlord somewhere is trying to gaslight an entire generation into believing otherwise.

In the oft-referenced scene, Sophia prank-calls the notoriously gullible Rose and poses as a PCH representative, telling her that she has won the sweepstakes and that Ed McMahon will be coming to her house to deliver her check. The fact that McMahon never worked for PCH is part of the joke: Rose is too naive and too excited to question Sophia’s story, even when it contains a glaring error. It’s the Golden Girls equivalent of Han trying to impress Luke by telling him that the Falcon made the Kessel run in twelve parsecs or the Third Doctor claiming to fix something by reversing the polarity of the neutron flow. People who don’t get that end up becoming part of the joke, as they reveal themselves to be as gullible as Rose.

Emily

Camera update.

After some consideration, I opted to postpone replacing my DSLR for another year or two. Mirrorless cameras are starting to crowd out DSLRs, and I want to see where this goes and spend some time doing my homework before I invest a grand or more in a new camera.

That said, I still need something that focuses faster than my tired old Rebel, especially when I’m trying to get cute pictures of the dogs at the prison — where my iPhone is not allowed — so I did a little poking around online and decided to order a Kodak Pixpro AZ528. It gets good reviews and has several features I think I’ll use, so hopefully it will prove to be a good investment. It’s supposed to come in tomorrow, so I’ll be able to spend some time this week playing with it. We’ll see how it goes.

Emily

Yeesh.

I have GOT to get a new camera. Ron asked me to shoot an assignment for him this morning while he was in Albuquerque for the state basketball tournament, and my Canon POS Rebel’s laggy autofocus really showed its arse.

I still managed to get a couple of usable shots, but it’s time for a new camera. This one wasn’t great when I bought it, and at 13 years old, it has not improved with age.

Neither has Canon as a brand, apparently; online reviews are telling me the autofocus issue is an ongoing problem. (Come on, Canon. You had ONE JOB.) Meanwhile, the Nikon D7500, which runs about a grand for body and basic lens, gets good reviews, and adjusted for inflation, it’s about $300 less than I spent for my first Canon back in 2005.

Alternately, given the amount of time I don’t spend taking pictures these days, a bridge camera might not be a bad idea; the main place I take my camera these days is the prison, where I am not allowed to use my phone, and where a bulky DSLR isn’t terribly practical. Kodak makes several bridges for under $300, and they all get good reviews. Maybe I’ll pick one up next time I’m in Amarillo and just kick that can down the road a little bit.

One way or the other, I need to replace the Rebel, and this is probably as good a time as any to do it, since I’m on break and have time to take it out and experiment with it.

Emily

Frustrated

I don’t know why this happens, but sometimes my brain doesn’t seem to understand when I’ve been productive.

Since break started yesterday afternoon, I have crossed several items off my to-do list: I bought groceries last night, made a Greek yogurt cheesecake, poop-scooped the backyard, worked out (including a 24.5-mile ride on the stationary bike while watching Astrid), started a load of laundry, got up this morning and made a bowl of oatmeal with almond flour and hemp seeds in it for extra protein, disassembled the gooseneck on the bathroom sink and removed all the gunk that was slowing down the drain, zipped the tub drain while I was thinking about it, scrubbed the bathroom, hung up the laundry, washed the dishes, updated my bullet journal, and took Marley to the coffeehouse for a little socialization.

I am aware that this is a perfectly reasonable number of tasks to complete in a 24-hour period, and I should feel good about the fact that I have gotten my break off to a productive start, but I don’t, because in that same 24-hour period, I have had at least three episodes of ADHD time blindness that ate several hours I could have used to clear my entire to-do list. The fact that I spent time not getting things done shouldn’t cancel out the things I did get done, but somehow, it does, so instead of feeling good about what I’ve accomplished so far, I’m just irritated with myself for not doing more.

I’ve noticed that ADHD symptoms always get worse when I’m tired, so a good night’s sleep should put me back to rights, but I’m pretty frustrated at the moment.

Emily

Certified Good Girl

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Honey’s paperwork came in today from Alliance of Therapy Dogs, so she is now a certified therapy dog.

She is not technically required to have a piece of paper saying she’s a therapy dog, and therapy dogs do not have any special rights or legal protections, but ten minutes into Pearl’s first day at work last year, I ran into somebody from central office who wanted to know whether she was a certified therapy dog. With that little heads-up to tell me which way the wind was blowing, I spent the next few weeks getting all her paperwork in order to join ATD and then apply for an AKC Therapy Dog Novice title.

I figured it was a good idea to do the same thing for Honey, so as soon as she’d been under my roof for six months, I put together her ATD application. I’ll get her AKC application together over spring break, and I’m hoping I can get hold of a Canine Good Citizen evaluator and get her tested for her CGC title while I’m at it.

Emily

P.S.: The photo is Honey’s school picture. I think she sneezed right as the photographer took the picture, but the result looks like a saucy wink that the kids and I thought was absolutely hilarious.

Carfiction

It’s a good thing I have never, ever given a single, solitary damn about the mythical “trade-in value” of a car, because if I did, I think I’d be looking for a lawyer right about now.

When Carfax began, it sounded like a good idea: People buying used cars could get information about how well those cars had been maintained, whether they’d been in any crashes that might compromise their structural integrity, etc., etc., etc.

Living in a small town with exactly zero car dealerships and commuting half a mile to work every morning, I have a different opinion of this service.

At least once every couple of weeks, I get an email telling me about my trade-in value, reminding me that Big Brother is watching my maintenance habits, and insisting that it’s time for an oil change.

Pay no attention to the car’s mileage minder. Ignore the actual computer in the car, which is documenting real-time data and making constant calculations about oil life. Never mind that according to the numbers based on ACTUAL USAGE, this vehicle is still at 40% oil life and won’t need an oil change before summer. If I don’t want Carfics telling anybody with access to my VIN number that I’ve been neglecting my vehicle, I need to drop everything and drive 80 miles to the nearest dealership to have my oil changed.

I have no idea how this is legal. It feels a whole lot like collusion between dealerships to force people to bring their vehicles in for unnecessary service in a quixotic attempt to keep from getting ripped off on their next trade-in. If I were a class-action lawyer looking to make bank, I think I might be really, really interested in this.

Joke’s on all of ’em, though: I’m going to drive this car until the wheels fall off, and when it has reached the absolute limit of its useful life, I am going to donate it to charity and pay cash for a 1965 Volkswagen Karmann Ghia.

Let’s see these arseholes monitor THOSE maintenance records.

Emily

Dark Winds

The new season of Dark Winds is out. If you’re not watching it, what are you even doing with your free time?

The series has diverged so far from the books that it’s barely recognizable. The first couple of seasons merged up a few storylines and made some adjustments to a few characters, but this season is wandering so far from its source material (The Ghostway) that I’m honestly not sure where it’s going. This kind of discrepancy normally irritates me, but I’m guessing the idea was to keep it fresh for longtime fans of the books, so I’m choosing to watch it as AU fanfic, which makes the changes a bit less jarring.

Changes I dislike: Leaphorn and Chee have all but swapped personalities, which is weird. I don’t understand this decision. TV Leaphorn has an entirely different backstory from book Leaphorn and makes decisions that are distinctly out of character for the legendary lieutenant I fell in love with when I read Coyote Waits for English class 35 years ago. I’m buying in anyway, mostly because Zahn McClarnon is deliciously intense, but I wish they’d stayed a little more true to Leaphorn’s character. The same goes for Chee: Kiowa Gordon is a good actor and inhabits the character he’s been handed, but that character is not the Jim Chee I know and love, and it’s been hard for me to warm up to him.

That said, I love this reimagining of Bernadette Manuelito. The book version of Bernie is endearing and relatable, but TV Bernie is tougher and smarter, and Jessica Matten gives her a gravitas she never had in the books. This Bernie is not to be trifled with, and I love her for it.

The acting is good all the way around — they’ve had some excellent guest stars, including a few deeply unsettling villains — and Ron and I are enjoying the fact that the show was shot on location in New Mexico, so we see a few familiar places now and then.

Dark Winds is on AMC. Go watch it.

Classroom setup

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I finally woke up enough this afternoon to go to school and spend a few hours working in my classroom.

I reconfigured my spare plant stand to fit under my desk, bought some dollar-store storage bins to use with it, and ended up with a fairly decent setup for my desk, with storage underneath and a couple of chairs at the end for students to use if they need assistance with a project or assignment.

I turned the old desk into a storage center for things we use on a regular basis: notebook paper, looseleaf reinforcements, spiral notebooks, printer paper, and the like. The top of the desk provides plenty of space for pencils, tape, stapler, hole punch, paper, a few decorative items, and whatever book we’re using this week.

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I still need to move the phone and printer and reorganize the shelves behind the desk, but otherwise, I’ve got it set up the way I want it.

I’m hoping that by swapping my old desk for a purpose-built computer table, I’ll have a better shot at getting the height of my workstation adjusted to a level that won’t cause muscle spasms in my traps.

During spring break, I’m going to fine-tune the whole setup by parking my phone nearby and taking video of myself sitting at my desk with my hands on the keyboard and my eyes on the monitors so I can compare my configuration to one of those diagrams that show the optimal ergonomic setup.

It’s wild to me that quiet, sedentary work in front of a computer causes me more pain than training dogs, mucking out stalls, turning compost, or cleaning kennels ever has. If I’d known what computers were going to do to my body, I think I’d have blown off those honors classes in favor of the voc-ed program. I’d probably still have chronic pain, but at least it would be respectable pain, incurred while doing something legitimately strenuous, and not this embarrassing nonsense caused by sitting on my arse in front of a computer for too long.

Emily

Zzzzzzzzzzz…

I had a list of things I wanted to do today, but instead, I took a dose of cyclobenzaprine last night and another around lunchtime today and have spent most of the past 36 hours sleeping.

I’m still sleepy, but the knots in my shoulders have finally loosened up, and I can’t remember the last time I slept this deeply. Tackling that to-do list without any pain will be a nice change of pace.

Emily

Sustainability on a shoestring

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