My ears ring so much
During allergy season
I’ve stopped answering
The Early Bird Gets The Worm *First*
The surest sign of spring, they say,*
Is birds regurgitating worms
For birdies smaller still than they
Who’ve clearly never heard of germs.
*Okay, I’m “they.” True, anyway.
Feeling Alive
There’s something like five oceans
And more than seven seas;
There’s lakes and bays and waterways,
More coves than kinds of cheese.
Add in water vapor,
H2O is everywhere!
So you can bet that when you’re wet
From now on, Betsy’s there.
Regifting FTW
Sure, you’re talented,
But your talent’s not a gift
Until it’s been shared.
It Takes Two
If it’s only you
Who’s convinced you’re being watched
Then you’re just annoyed.
Zero Sum Game
If you’re too relaxed, avoid
The rogue endocannabinoid
That likes to lurk and so surprise
The unaware who exercise.
Endorphins are what you want less of
If your motivator’s stress. Love
Tension? You’ll like least of all
That workouts lower cortisol.
Aerobic exercise is hell
On those who don’t like sleeping well,
And anti-brain plasticity
Adherents say, “Go ‘way, Tai Chi!”
Please, be wary: Simply moving
Purposefully means improving
Self-efficacy and mood.
It’s tough to stress out that way, dude!
Exercise and stress are foes–
The more of these, the less of those–
So if it’s exercise you choose,
You only have your stress to lose.
Dinner, Then A Movie
If I had some eggs
I could make some ham and eggs
But I just watched Babe
I’ll Get Back To Me
I’m going to have to admit before long
That I seem to be doing time management wrong.
I’ve penciled it in for the week after next,
Which I’d tried just a fortnight ago. I’m perplexed.
Having scheduled it ought to have freed up my mind
To forget it, so why am I always behind?
The calendar’s here to dispense with the need
For this host of old Post-its I don’t ever read,
But it’s constantly full, so I’m starting to doubt
It can help. I’ll look into it, um…three weeks out.
At Least Lenny Used The Whole Rabbit
Clovers with three leaves, not four,
Are fortune-neutral, but a bunny
With three feet is fortune-poor*
Alhough they dine on clover. Funny.
*They’ve no use for bipeds’ money.
The Brutalists
First, I’d like to thank
The Academy for not
Playing me off too–