Taking a Chance on Taking Chance
Posted: August 17, 2025 Filed under: Musings, Relationships | Tags: American, bearing witness, Death, dievca, Emotions, History, Honor, Life, Military, Movie, respect, sadness Leave a commentMoving into 1st person for a moment.
I was stupidly wandering Instagram Reels and for some reason someone’s compilation of scenes from the movie, Taking Chance, popped up. The movie came out in 2009 via HBO. I’ve never had HBO. I didn’t know the movie existed. I ended up watching the clips…then crying hard. A little too close to home.
But the film seems to be so on point and well done~
Do I watch the movie and ugly cry for 80+ minutes?
Do I pass and miss something I should be witnessing/ honoring?
Its similar to when I was on the Grand Jury and a case of someone being set on fire (evidence included graphic photos) – I felt my job was to be present and bear witness.
I’ll watch.
Last night was sad, then it got sadder
Posted: July 29, 2025 Filed under: Musings | Tags: Chicago Cubs, Death, dievca, Health, Life, Lin Brehmer, Midwest, Prostrate Cancer, radio, Ryne Sandberg, sadness, WXRT 1 Comment
Photo from the Chicago Tribune. Ryne Sandberg’s statue at Wrigley Field. Ryne passed yesterday.
And then in dievca’s noodling she found out:

Who? WXRT – Music Director, Disc Jockey, Radio Personality For 30 years, Lin Brehmer (an avid Chicago Cubs fan) hosted an annual remote broadcast for Cubs home opening day.
XRT? dievca’s “still in existence” favorite radio station…
Two Good Guys taken down by Prostate Cancer.
Get checked.
disappearing City
Posted: June 7, 2023 Filed under: Home and Garden, Neighborhood Anecdotes (NYC) | Tags: BDSM, D/s, dievca, fire, Health, natural disaster, NYC, photo, sadness, smoke, submissive, Weather 2 Comments
dievca cannot see downtown, the Hudson river, nor the East side from her apartment due to the wildfire smoke coming down from Canada. The weather patterns are causing the particles to collect in the atmosphere. No winds or rain to help clear the air.
The color is a deeper yellow than in dievca’s photo – it reminds dievca of a sky that warns of a Tornado in the Midwest. Yes, its been hard to breath on the bike these past two days. The apartment windows are closed and locked.
If this is what is coming down to NYC from Canada – dievca’s heart breaks for the Canadians who are dealing the wildfires 1st hand, because the 2nd hand smoke is a mess.
Where to begin?
Posted: December 30, 2022 Filed under: Fashion, lingerie | Tags: BDSM, Corset, D/s, Death, dievca, Elegant, erotic, Life, sadness, Vivienne Westwood Leave a comment
Vivienne Westwood, the designer who defined the look of punk, using rock iconography, royalty, art and religion as recurring motifs in collections that brought a rebellious edge to British style, and who later went on to a long career in high fashion, died on Thursday in the Clapham neighborhood of South London. She was 81.
Via the New York Times on 12/29/2022
Needed a moment (again) to regroup
Posted: September 7, 2022 Filed under: Analysis, lingerie, Relationships | Tags: BDSM, cancer, D/s, dievca, Dominance and submission, Elegant, erotic, friendship, Illness, Life, sadness, submissive, travel 2 Comments
A long weekend – a college friend has chosen not to operate on their cancer due to quality of Life and has five years. This is where you find out what speaks to you in Life and you do it.
Photo: Vivienne Westwood Lingerie BDSM
Kindness and a Libation
Posted: January 16, 2022 Filed under: Musings | Tags: Appreciation, Caring, Death, dievca, elderly parents, Gifts, Joy, Life, Love, sadness, Thank you, time 1 Comment
A very large , “Thank You” for your kind words and glasses lifted up to honor a good Life.
The thoughts and presentations are so lovely. And dievca is working through her bottle over a long period as she replies to texts and phone calls. A little lubrication to celebrate a Life and ease the pain of kindness.
How are you all doing? What’s going on in your lives?
(dievca’s coming up for air~)
The Date ~
Posted: November 14, 2021 Filed under: Entertainment, Relationships | Tags: BDSM, D/s, dating, dievca, Joy, Life, Love, pain, Relationships, sadness, searching Leave a commentdievca’s been watching friends Zoom date, navigate around COVID-19 and death, sort through the ashes of a relationship that crashed hard and, in one case, is watching a friend reunite happily with an old Flame.
L’appuntamento
Ho sbagliato tante volte ormai
che lo so già
che oggi quasi certamente
sto sbagliando su di te.
Ma una volta in più che cosa può cambiare
nella vita mia…
Accettare questo strano appuntamento
è stata una pazzia!
Sono triste tra la gente che
mi sta passando accanto,
ma la nostalgia di rivedere te
è forte più del pianto.
Questo sole accende sul mio volto
un segno di speranza.
Sto aspettando quando a un tratto
ti vedrò spuntare in lontananza!
Amore, fai presto,
io non resisto…
Se tu non arrivi, non esisto,
non esisto, non esisto…
È cambiato il tempo e sta piovendo,
ma resto ad aspettare.
Non m’importa cosa il mondo può pensare,
io non me ne voglio andare.
Io mi guardo dentro e mi domando,
ma non sento niente.
Sono solo un resto di speranza
perduta tra la gente.
Amore, è già tardi
e non resisto…
Se tu non arrivi, non esisto,
non esisto, non esisto…
Luci, macchine, vetrine, strade, tutto quanto
si confonde nella mente.
La mia ombra si è stancata di seguirmi,
il giorno muore lentamente.
Non mi resta che tornare a casa mia
alla mia triste vita.
Questa vita che volevo dare a te
l’hai sbriciolata tra le dita…
Amore, perdono,
ma non resisto…
Adesso per sempre non esisto,
non esisto, non esisto…
The Date
I was wrong so many times by now,
I already know
that almost certainly today
I am wrong about you
but what difference can one more time make
in this life of mine..
Accepting this odd date,
it was insanity! (some folly)
I am sad among the people
passing by
but the wistful feeling (nostalgia) of seeing you again
is stronger than the tears
This sun lights up on my face
a sign of hope
I am waiting and suddenly
I will see you appear yonder (in the distance)
My love be here soon (hurry up),
I can’t take it (resist)
if you don’t come, I don’t exist
I don’t exist, I don’t exist …
The weather has changed, and it is raining
but I stay and wait (keep on waiting)
I am not concerned (don’t care) about what the world will think [of me]
I don’t wanna go.
I look within myself and wonder
but I feel nothing (hear nothing?)
I am just some remains of hope
lost among people
My love, it’s already late
and I can’t take it (resist)
if you don’t come, I don’t exist
I don’t exist, I don’t exist …
Lights, cars, shop windows, roads
they all confuse into my mind
my shadow got tired of following me
the day slowly dies
All that’s left is to go back to my house
to my sad life
This life I wanted to give to you
you crumbled it between your fingers
My love, forgive me, but I can’t take it…
Now forever, I don’t exist
Celebration of a Friend’s Life – an Outfit
Posted: September 26, 2021 Filed under: Accessories, Clothing, Jewelry | Tags: BDSM, brunch, celebration, D/s, dievca, friendship, Joy, Life, Love, Memorial, Outfits, sadness, submissive Leave a commentRoll over the photos for item descriptions.
Something simple worn to brunch celebrating the Life of a close friend.
It was a lovely day in NYC.
My Mom isn’t eating much.
Posted: July 25, 2021 Filed under: Musings | Tags: dievca, elderly parents, Family, grief, Hospice, Life, Love, Mother, Relationships, sadness Leave a comment
And she is a sleeping more. Is it depression or time to go?
Its the first time dievca’s Mom wanted to sleep rather than speak with her.
When you are the youngest of the two youngest and everyone (Dad/Aunts/Uncles) have passed. Your last tie to an Era will soon be cut. You can only hope that your oldest cousins can answer your questions about Family.
she knows she shouldn’t borrow trouble, but dievca’s heart is hurting.
Her Mom’s Life isn’t really a Life – so it will be good when Mom catches up with dievca’s Dad. She misses him
dievca just keeps sending Love from her mind and her heart.
The demise of the discount…
Posted: December 6, 2020 Filed under: Accessories, Clothing, Musings | Tags: BDSM, Century21Stores, closures, COVID-19, D/s, dievca, Life, mourning, NYC, Retail, sadness, Shopping Leave a comment
NYC is one of the Fashion Capitals of the World. It’s a place where you can buy items at full price and it WAS a place where you could find excellent discounts on items. Discount stores, sample sales, etc.
Retail is tough.
In the 16 years, she has lived in NYC, she has watched the closure of Daffy’s, Filene’s Basement (Boston-based), Barneys Warehouse, Loehmann’s, and now – the Crown Jewel – Century 21.
Granted the Joy of digging through the racks for a deep deal had diminished when they cleaned up and reorganized the main store. But there were still deals to be had~
dievca will mourn the loss of Vivienne Westwood dresses, Moschino coats, Martin Margiela pants, Louboutin heels, Missoni gloves, Failero Sarti scarves, Chloe sunglasses, Proenza Schouler bags, etc. she took a peek through her closet, Century 21 has let her develop an amazing clothing and accessory collection and find unique pieces from obscure labels.
In the big picture of Life — this closure doesn’t mean much, but in the little details that create Joy, there will be a large hole for Fashion Shoppers. Touching a piece of fabric is much different than seeing it on a computer screen.
