they were coming out
like burnt worms
out of my ears and nose
and mouth
along with a lot of smoke
consigning me
to the heart
of madness
so today I don’t want
a single thought
in my head
I just want
the bright sun
and blue sky
and green mountains
and air.
biting and chewing
all the time
and in my ears
there is madness
like rats squeaking
in holes
on my tongue
is the next world war
and I can’t speak
and all this
is stopping
my breath
making me see
blood and darkness
everywhere
and in a moment
I am smoke.
slices my neck
and I can feel
the burning pain
as I am severed
head and body
and the world
is a buzz
a swarm of insects
that I hear
in my ear
life is a bitch
really
a bad joke
a fatal choke
is this death’s poke
and you are smoke
that disappears
but before you go
you suddenly know
there shouldn’t be
any tears
you have
no more fears
and to this universe
you say three cheers.
and as I hear
the hiss of smoke
I recall my existence
full of strife
shattering
my brain
causing me
so much pain
bringing
me misery
making me
so weary
of this world
I embrace death
with love.
with nails
in the morning
and there is
blood everywhere
and I can feel
my skull crack
and catch fire
and I open
my mouth
and smoke
comes out
of it
and my nose
and my ears
and then
my eyes
ooze out
now my world
is black
and soon
I am gone
from it.
and my mind
is full of smoke
I have no idea
what happened
but I think I saw
fire burning
and before that
dead people
with their
necks broken
were rising
into the sky
and now beneath
my feet I feel
no ground
I am falling
and it is terrible
this dropping
at high speed
and I cannot
breathe
and there
my head
flies off
and my life
ends.
and my mind
is stuck somewhere
my body thrashes about
like a fish out of water
and the world
is so mysterious
its silence
is incomprehensible
it makes me
forget myself
and I want to know
if I am a fly
confusion
is the very air
I breathe
and smoke rises
all around
and finally I see
myself hung
and roasting like
a hunted animal
on the fire.
at night
down lonely streets
and there is thunder
in the sky
the world begins
to burn
and your body heats up
and slowly starts to melt
till you completely disappear
and then you find
that you too have become a ghost
and the universe now has totally
burnt up and turned to ash
and you are floating
through the cosmos
and the smoke is all over you
as you pass through it
and you know the world
has ended
and there is
only greyness
and then that too is gone.
who disappear like smoke
everything that lives dies
and the Earth keeps rejuvenating
all the time
O what an organism it is
how many feet it has borne
so many lives it takes
it consumes to feed its hunger
and we and everything else
that grows on it is fodder
but for now the golden sun blazes
on the green mountains
and the trees are so beautiful
how they delight my heart
and I feel life is wonderful
and the cocks crow in assent
and the wind says it is true.
your fire destroying everything
such tales of horror
lurk in the air
the silent screams
of so many dead children
the heart has been shredded
it has lost its function
so that makes us dead
we are ghosts talking
and we are so useless
we just worsen things
see what life has done to us
see what death has done to us
and how painful to know
there is nothing in our hands
they are just smoke
and when we howl in terror
we have no voice
and soon the entire universe
is ash grey ghostly
and crumbling in the wind
and in seconds
we are all gone.
Dominic Alapat 