“Gentlemen, life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay the more you end up looking like Matt’s grandma.”
•
“Son, if you give a 110% of yourself tonight, people are gonna look at you differently. They’re going to look at you like someone who doesn’t really understand how percentages work.”
•
“If you can’t outplay them, outwork them. If you can’t outwork them, out think them. If you can’t outthink them, out-something-else them, I don’t fucking know, I’m not Confucius.”
•
“Opportunities are like buses, boys. There’s always another one coming along. Though if you take an Uber you won’t have to sit next to one of those “bus people.”
•
“There are times in life when it’s okay for a man to cry. Like when that man is a girl.”
•
“You know what champions do? They win. And do you know why they win? Because they’re champions. And do you know what makes them champions? I think it’s that winning thing.”
•
“Remember what my dad used to say: ‘It always looks bad before it gets better.'” And then he would leave for three months and come back smelling like gin and regret. And Aunt Rita”
•
“Success is not a goal, gentlemen, it’s a byproduct. Like that shit they put in cat food.”
•
“You gotta give 110%.”
I don’t think that’s possible, Coach.
“I’m a football coach. If I understood math I’d be one of those people who stands up in front of the class and talks about math and stuff.”
You mean a math teacher?
“Fuck you, Poindexter.”
•
“Don’t mess with Texas. (She’s got the VD.)”
4. Wipe that smile off your face.
Mike is happy. 
