10. Wait, what? What kind of psychopath buys gifts for Thanksgiving?
9. Your company is more than enough, sweetheart.
8. And a simple ‘thank you’ would be nice.
7. Okay, maybe you could bring a little something. Maybe a nice green bean casserole? I read that the woman who invented it just died. It’s the least you could do. She died.
6. And how about this year you taste it before you say you don’t like it.
5. Can we not spend all afternoon glued to the TV watching the goddamn Lions and Matt Patricia that traitor bastard for chrissake?
4. Wipe that smile off your face.
3. Be a dear and look in the pantry closet for the good gravy boat Evelyn Broadwater got me last Thanksgiving.
2. Really look.
1. A wreath might be nice.
5. Know better.
Mike is happy. 
