in the darkness there is light at the neighbour’s house.

which makes me happy. because lights always make me happy.

i am loving the colourful bulbs wrapped around trees and strung across streets.

thundery clouds threatening to burst-the wind lashing against our windows- sunlight on one side and dark angry clouds on the other-whistling orchestra reminiscent of bon vista days-beautiful beautiful city with each colour heightened-glistening-rain coming down in strokes-

seemed like a punishment to sit indoors so we went for a drive in AA’s blue liana-we tried the bread people cafe on shahbaz-heavenly large picture windows, metropolitan urban interiors, comfy sofas and delicious food-sat there for a couple of hours oohing and aahing over an overexcitedly teal vitz, a sunburst yellow sportscar, and an unreal cherry red coke truck-blissful, beautiful, calming, inspiring, really really something to be grateful for.

yummy strawberries, with creamy cream mixed with icing sugar.

perfect after-dinner dessert.

Out of all my married sundays, if i was to choose, this would be my favourite sunday scene.

As we grow from childhood to responsible adult, we are taught how to look at the world. Our vision is formed by those around us, and by our own experiences. Look thats a bad thing to do-what you just did is wrong-how could you have not seen that-yes thats a good girl. We form these patterns and follow them through life. Naturally along the way, we lose our ability to question, to appreciate the mundane, to find glory in the not-so-glorious. Some of us are lucky to be surrounded by friends/family who constantly prod, and probe, and question till we are forced to re think our opinion, re do our action, re visualize our life. Others might find themselves plodding on diligently, standing by their pubescent ideals; thou shalt not, thou shalt.

What is even more fascinating is that there are always opportunities around us which allow us to change perspective and shift our way of looking at things, but mostly we seem to ignore them. Things which are a part of our daily existence have the capacity to teach us, but we choose to keep looking for the big aha moment when everything will be revealed in all its clarity. Instead of focusing on little everyday revelations, we spend our lives searching for a certain something which remains elusive.

“We tend not to value the things we do every day, but those are the things that transform the world around us.” Paulo Coelho

As i was going through the images i wanted to post for these two days, i realized that though i am proud of my “thinker” status, i too am constantly plagued by this pathetic what’s-next-what’s-now-mentality. This constant need to keep moving. I talk of appreciating the simple, but Iact out this impatience with the beauty in daily rituals. A 20 minute wait in a traffic jam with our husband/mother/friend shouldnt have us reaching for our tylenol or balm, it should calm us in the realization that this is 20 minutes of precious time where you cant do anything, your husband/mother/sister is not distracted, and joy-oh-joy all those things you had been storing to share can now be shared.

I am trying hard to fight this urge to think of the next 10 minutes and just be happy with the now ten minutes, and thats what i want to hold sacred today.

what would we do without them? mommies are god’s unbelievably brilliant invention.

i always loved her, but i appreciate her so much more now that i am not living with her. she makes everything seem easy. With my hubby’s parents out of town, we are all alone in the big house of which we use just a part-when i think of sleeping there alone, i get scared-but inevitably i stop at mommy’s house after work and somehow her presence seems to reassure that the night will be fine, it will all be fine.

just say your ayat ul qursi is what she says to me – and i do.

getting married isnt easy. as an idea it takes time to really settle in your mind. sometimes it has nothing to do with the other person in the marriage, but just to do with you. it’s all about your mad thoughts, your battle for what you think is a loss of individuality, a loss of control. at a turbulent time like this, you feel the need to surround yourself with all things comfortable, with actions which speak of familiarity, with people who knew you as you were. in the midst of this episode of lost you reach out and you find a little idea which slowly nurtures you. practising it daily makes you regain your centre. each day makes you calmer, and more settled.

for me that little something was my daily ritual of making my own tea, in my own little breakfast corner. the day could be a terrible one and i would find it melt away when i came home to this. this seemingly mundane, yet astoundingly comforting 10 minutes of the day held my hand and led me into married bliss.

this morning i needed to be on time, the night before had left its mark under my eyes, but as i crawled out of bed, opened the blinds and put the kettle on, things were seeming very good. by the time the tea was brewed and i took the first sip, i could mentally tick off all the good things that could happen today. I finished the tea slowly and then rushed to get ready, knowing that as long as those 10 minutes were mine to cherish, life was oh so fine and marriage; definitely my cup of tea.

I have been feeling so disconnected with myself lately. I feel like i am not listening to myself or more aptly i am not talking to myself. The jumbled thoughts in my brain dont seem to want to come out in a coherent sequence of words which i can store in my journal or post here. More annoyingly, they dont want to help inspire me to be creative. They just want to stand blocking the doorway, frustrating me.

In an attempt to restart the channels of communication, i went blog hunting. Here’s something i found on a blog, which got me excited. i loved the idea and plan to begin from tomorrow.

The My Sacred Life Project
“…every day for at least a month I’m going to post a photo from my daily life capturing something that connects me to Spirit. It might be my altar, a candle I’m burning, my dogs, the garden, a friend, a book I’m reading, nature, something I did, someplace I went, something important to me, or, who knows, maybe just my morning bowl of Cheerios! The idea is to creatively connect with the holiness of my everyday life…”

till then-