We're not currently undergoing any actual fertility treatments...mainly because the doc is trying to "up" hubby's counts. So hubby has been on Noveral shots - every other day - for the past two and a half months and will be for another month or so...I also convinced him to start taking Fertilaid and Countboost for men. He's been taking those for about a month now and if nothing else, he says that he feels a lot better!
We're REALLY hoping all of this will up his low counts so we can at least try to do an IUI before we use our last two tot-cicles. :)
So I have to admit here - and PLEASE don't anyone judge...but a friend of mine from college...she and her wife are pregnant with boy/girl twins. I am VERY happy for them because of course they have what you would call "situational fertility" being lesbians. However, part of me gets so jealous when I see her post about her and her wive's babies (they aren't born yet, so it's all ultrasounds, etc...). I truly am VERY happy for her as she (my friend from college) has had a some-what hard life and she deserves so much happiness! But...it's so hard not to think "wow, lesbians can get pregnant and WE can't???" :(
It sucks. A friend of mine I met online through Justmommies - who only lives one state over from me - who came to my birthday party in August...she and I have had very similar IF stories - fresh failed cycle + frozen failed cycle...had her third frozen cycle two weeks ago...she only had one frozen emby to transfer - but I prayed SO hard for her...and...nothing. :( My heart absolutely breaks for her. Granted, they will try again, but I wanted it to work for them SO badly!!
My husband has been letting me cry a bit more about IF here and there. I know he doesn't really like it when I "dwell" on it...but I think he gets that I need to "get it out" sometimes. Like last night I just started crying out of the blue and he doesn't tell me to shut up about it, he just lets me get it out. I know it hurts him too.
Last month I found out a co-worker was going on maternity leave and I didn't even realize she had been pregnant (granted, I work from home 2-3 days a week and we have like 75 people in our department...) but I came home crying about that and he didn't really understand why it upsets me so much EVERY time this happens...then the next day, he came home and apologized and said "yeah, now I get it...today my boss's daughter had her baby and that's all they talked about. I'm sorry. I understand now." So that of course
He did say to me though - about 2 weeks ago? "This will be our last Christmas without a baby." He said it so matter of factly. God I hope he's right!
