Out with the old..

Alright good friends, I'm afraid that the time has come to end this blog...

I have a new life, one where I need to blog about my fam, rather than my singleness. So, I am starting a new blog, you can check out the adventures of Ken and Andrea at KandABuley.blogspot.com.

"See" you all there!

Mr. Toad's Wild Ride

This is the story of my life these days.

Turns out, the ups and downs of combining your life with another person's can be quite challenging. For those who know stubborn, thick headed, know it all Andrea, the humbling of trying to cool down, reason with my very logical and amazing fiance has been a crazy adventure, and not always the most fun.

Birth control and I are not friends. We had 2 month relationship which left me in tears and frustrated without much control (remember puberty? I didn't until me and BC had a little tif). So, I stopped associating with one BC and am getting ready to hang out with another soon.

Thanks to Ken for not killing me, Susie for talking me down and Barb for sympathizing with me so well in my crazy phase. I have the most wonderful angels in my life. I know Heavenly Father gave them to me for a reason.

After going to the temple on Saturday, and calming down quite a bit, I am getting excited for that little thing that is taking over my life- the wedding. But, more importantly, I am getting excited to be a family with my bestest friend and person I love the most in this world, Ken. I have been reading The Family: A Proclamation to the World, and there is so much wisdom and good counsel in it. I think my favorite phrase is where it reads, "Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work and wholesome recreational activities."

This is so different from what the world teaches, that marriage is about fulfillment, sex, money, power and control. Marriage is a sacred partnership with a God who loved us so much, He allows us to be together with the ones we love FOREVER if we live and do according to his plan. That doesn't mean it will be easy. President Uchtdorf gave an mazing talk in the General Young Women's meeting, called Your Happily Ever After. Access it here: http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1207-40,00.html

Elder Uchtodrf reminds us all of what President Hinckley would say

“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he has been robbed. The fact is that most putts don’t drop, most beef is tough, most children grow up to be just like people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, and most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is just like an old time rail journey … delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride.” GBH quoting Jenkin Loyd Jones

Life is not always bliss, often it is more work than ever anticipated. But, that does not mean it isn't joyful! Sometimes the hardest times of my life have made me more happy in the end than I had ever dreamed: My mission, Nursing School, not marrying a man I deeply loved at the time, etc. Heavenly Father's peace, His plan, His Happily Ever After don't mean fairy dust, fairy Godmothers and magic. His happily ever after means making each of us into the person that can return to Him and live with Him in His joy, in the Celestial life we were created for. Who said that a Magic wand, a dream, or some fairies were in order? Who said we wouldn't have to work at it? Heavenly Father never said any of it. He simply promised us all that He has.

And, and the end of one trial, at the close of one hard moment, there is a little joy. You realize that you are learning, and growing, that you love the Lord, your spouse to be and the process each a little more. You realize that blessings come after the tribulation, and that Heavenly Father loves us so much that He lets us struggle and learn for ourselves.

So, Mr. Toad, take your wild ride and head out! I am going to take the Lord's path for me. It won't be wild, it will be calculated. It might feel crazy, and nothing like I planned, but the truth is that its far better.

Wedding Plans...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was planning my wedding.

I'm having fun, but I also feel like weddings are capable of making bridezillas out of the best of us. But, I know some people have been wondering about the details of this crazy little thing called my wedding, so here it is...

Colors: Sage, cream and deep coral (only in the florals).

Dress: being made by a local dressmaker called Penny. She's great!

Reception: Cactus and Tropicals at 2700 South and 2000 East.

Photographer: My friend Joanna Hudson Oldham. Check out her pictures, they are amazing! www.imagesbyjoanna.com

Flowers: My friend Chelsea Thornton. I love her stuff! Check it out www.thepinkpomegranate.blogspot.com

Luncheon: TBD...

Invitations: Xpedx, with printing by a local company TBD

Cake: TBD... most likely Granite Bakery, any other suggestions?

Bridemaids: Black dresses and sage silk sashes. Susie(my pseudo sister), Barb (my best friend), Laura (my sister-in-law), Robyn, Candy and Taren (Ken's sisters).

Groomsmen: White shirts, black pants and sage ties... we need to find sage ties! Anyone?

Honeymoon: Surprise! Ken is planning it! I have no idea what will happen!

If you all have any suggestions on the TBD stuff, I would LOVE it! Let me know your advice!

A Little Bling!

So, I have a bit of exciting news... I am ENGAGED!!!

Yes, most of you know this already, but some of you don't! And, it would behoove me to tell the story, as it will go down in history!

So, Ken is the greatest! We had been talking about this for about a month, and while I wouldn't call it an easy decision, it has been an intense bonding experience for both of us, and one that I think has helped us get to know each other all the better.

Once we got to the ring phase, my boy who takes four months to buy a pair of shoes, actually worked pretty quickly! He did a ton of research and we went shopping (though I swore I would never). When he decided on a stone, we went to the jewler who was making the ring, and he showed us the designs, and I approved.

The jewler was great, but he told me when the ring would be ready (BIG mistake). I was a mess, and we had been planning this wedding for a few weeks, and I was bursting at the seams to be able to tell people, but Ken hadn't yet asked my dad, and this little planner was beside herself.

On Mother's Day, Ken went to my parent's house without me, and had the "talk with my dad." It went well, because thereafter, my dad was announcing our engagement to everyone... and still me with no ring! Aaaah!!!

So, in the days that ensued, my panic grew. Did he have the ring? Was he just toying with me? Had he changed his mind and not told me? Finally, on Saturday after an emotional week of me being a basketcase, I knew something was up.

After a long talk and a tour of a venue for our reception, Ken took me up a trail behind Red Butte Gardens that he had frequented during his days as an RA at the U. I suspected the whole time that this was coming, but it was still amazing! When we reached an overlook that afforded a view of the valley, he showed me his "thinking rock," the rock he used to sit on and ponder the finer things of life.

He sat down on the rock, and positioned me on his lap, and proceded to talk to me about our future and the potential for happiness that our life together holds. Then, he leaned in and whispered in my ear that age old question... "Will you marry me?"

I turned a bit in his lap and kissed him and of course said "yes!" He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a little black velvet box. He pulled out the ring, and placing it on my hand, he said, "Here's your sparkly piece of carbon!"

We spent the rest of the day going from place to place announcing to our friends and family the big news, and I must say, my ring is amazingly beautiful!

But more than I love my ring, I love this incredibly loving, caring, patient man who wants to be with me forever. I can't say that this is what I expected for my marriage, it is so different from what I envisioned for myself, its infinitely better! I know without a doubt that Heavenly Father has a plan for me! I know that He knows far better than I what I need, and I know that I need Ken! He is the best man I have ever met! I can't wait to spend forever with him!

The Big Day is September 27- a Monday... you know Ken- got to be different!! Details of the planning and the fun ahead to come!

Our Vital Role in the NOW! A Lesson from Esther.

A print of this Minerva Teichert painting hangs on the wall of the Relief Society room in my parent's ward building. This painting depicts Queen Esther of the Bible, standing before her husband in a moment of vital decision. I never understood its significance, not until recently.

At my Stake Conference a few weeks ago, the President of the Salt Lake Temple, President Child, and his sweet wife, Sister Child spoke to us. I have been pondering Sister Child's words ever since, and wanted to simply blog a little on my thoughts.

Sister Child briefly recounted the Bible account of Queen Esther, the most beautiful maiden in the land that was chosen by King Ahasuerus to be his queen. Unbeknown to the king, however, was Esther's Jewish heritage. She had been counseled by her adoptive father to keep her heritage a secret from the king. Later, when a wicked and powerful man, Haman, decrees that all the Jews in the land shall be put to death, Esther's father counsels her to reveal her heritage to her husband, and speak on behalf of her people.

I can only just imagine how Esther felt at that moment. The fate of her family and friends laid to her charge, I am certain that she felt fear in the face of her husband, who had divorced his previous wife when she refused to obey him. She must have had thoughts amounting to "why me?" and "this isn't my responsibility, someone else can do it." I am sure that we have all had those thoughts. I am sure that we have looked in the mirror and said to ourselves, "why do I have to struggle through this?" "why would the Lord ask ME? I am sure there is someone more qualified/ better suited." But, Mordecai addressed these fears with a very profound statement.

Mordecai, Esther's father said to his daughter in her moment of inadequacy, and self-doubt, "Who knoweth but thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14. He told her that perhaps the Lord had prepared her for this moment, for a time when her people would be in danger and on the brink of extinction. He told her that perhaps the Lord wanted HER in this very difficult circumstance, because SHE was the only one who could perform this vital role at that time.

Do we think about that? Do we really consider that our role in the now, in our trials, in our callings, and our jobs and our classes is exactly what the Lord has prepared for us? Do we look upon each moment in life as a stepping stone to creating the kind of man or woman whom the Lord can rely on, who He can use for the benefit of all His sons and daughters?

Although we may not be called upon to save the Jews, or spend a night in a lion's den, or stand on a wall prophesying, we have been called to the time that we live and in the circumstances we are experiencing. Who knows but that you and I are speaking with the voice of the Lord every time we say a kind word or do our part to lift other's burdens and strengthen the feeble knees of those around us? Who knows how doing your visiting teaching this month, or having an optimistic attitude at work, or smiling at someone on the bus can be a fulfillment of the Plan of God for each of us? Who knows how important it is that we endure our trials well and have faith that the Lord has a plan for our lives?

May we stand, as Esther, and reveal who we are as covenant sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, and have the faith, hope and confidence that the Lord has us in the hollow of His Hand. "Who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?"

Today.

Well, blogging world, since I haven't posted since January, I think its time for an update! And, looks like today is the day. Here's what is going on in my life:

Work: Is crazy, but I think we are approaching the end of respiratory season, so it will calm soon. Love the extra money, love the kids, and love the job, but relief is an appropriate emotion here!

Ken: Is home for over a month now! I'm totally enjoying my boy! I love him!! Sad news is that he will most likely have to return to China in late April, early May... which makes me crazy. Oh well, look for me to be planning lots of lunches and girls nights around then! I need to catch up with my peeps!

Fam: Jonathan got pneumonia in the MTC, but is now in the Phillipines... I miss my J-Dawg. But Adam is coming home in 19 days!! I'm so excited!! My bro Matt was Niko, the flying monkey captain (did you know he had a name? I sure didn't) in his Middle School production of The Wizard of Oz- Ken and I went and enjoyed Matt's stunning rendition of a flying monkey. It was great. Also, in early February, my cousin Chris passed away very unexpectedly. It was quite the experience, but it makes me so grateful for the doctrine of eternal marriage and the Plan of Salvation. Also, I sure love both my immediate and extended families. We are there for each other through thick and thin... and that is certainly comforting!

Church: I was released from my calling as the FHE Coordinator for my ward, only to be called as the Second Counselor in the Stake Relief Society Presidency (what the heck, right?). I was also asked to speak in Stake Conference... oh the joy. But, truly, this new calling is stretching me, and I am so blessed to work with some amazing women, and I have the incredible opportunity of meeting the awesome sisters of the stake. Sometimes the Lord has a great sense of humor in answering our prayers.

Weather: Sorry to all of you winter lovers... HERE COMES SPRING!! I am overjoyed! I have to admit that I love the sunshine- it makes me giddy!!

Well, I hope that catches you all up on the me stuff!!! Not too interesting, but there it is!!

To Become...

I just had a really good conversation with my roommate about fulfilling our role as women in our Church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints), in our homes, and in the world.

We discussed the fact that, as women, we have been asked to accomplish it all. We are to get an education, in order to one day provide for ourselves and be self-reliant. We are then to toss that education to the wind when and if our Prince Charmings happen our way, and enter the unknown realm of motherhood and homemaking. We are also to be perfectly moderate in all of these things so as to be appealing to men, and not intimidating or overbearing.

We are to be the ultimate business woman and the most expert pie makers. We are to know perfectly how to articulate the meanings of intensive classical literature and soothe the nightmares of our toddlers. We are to work hard for degrees of honor, and then cast them aside for a far nobler profession which is unpredictable and perhaps not possible in circumstances. Anyone else a bit overwhelmed with our roles?

I think that while the world expects us to look stunning in a pair of heels, the world also expects us to push our way to the top of a still male-dominated society with the poise and grace that is demanded of our sex. The funny thing is, that what the world thinks really, truly doesn't matter.

Sometimes as women, as daughters of God, we have to stand back and realize how important the journey that we are experiencing really is. If we fail to realize who we really are, and what we are really doing, we will spend a great deal of time expecting unrealistic and unimportant things of our already incredible selves. Who we are as individuals is actually amazing. The traits we exhibit naturally, without Covergirl, Betty Crocker or Biophysics are astounding.

Instead of looking into a mirror and cataloguing our flaws, I wish we could look into ourselves and see what our Heavenly Father sees... an absolutely breathtaking creation who is on her way to becoming the most important role in all of life... HERSELF.

That woman will change the lives of her children, her coworkers, her classmates and herself. That woman will stand up for herself in times when those values that she holds dear are being attacked on all fronts. She will get frustrated, she will lose sight of her goals from time to time, she will stumble through life in patches, and she will make choices that lead to dead ends. But that woman will also brave that world with a confidence that is not fathomable in the world because she really knows who she is and what she was meant to do.

Please remember that the world is nothing special until you bring to it your unique gifts. Until you live up to the woman inside of you, there is very little else you accomplish that will bring with it true satisfaction, let alone true JOY! And, that ladies, is what we are here to experience, JOY.