This needs to be documented so I can remember it later.
I woke up this morning to a truly gorgeous, snow-covered world.
And I remembered the wonderful thing about snow: it makes the world lighter.
There are many unpleasant things about winter--cold, ice, snow, more cold, dry skin, etc. But the #1 thing I don't like, even hate, about winter is the DARKNESS. It is awful.
In Boston it is more awful than some places--both because we're so far north and because we're so far east. We really should be in a different time zone. So, the few precious hours of light are half spent in too early morning hours and we don't get to see them.
Then, it's been raining for weeks here (with a few clear days) so darker than normal.
This morning I work up and the world was oh, so bright. Almost as white and bright as the temple--now that is something to be happy about. So this morning I'm happy.
Just remind me when I have to walk out and drive in it later.
p.s. A sad side of this is that I live in a house where the kitchen is largely lighted by two big skylights. They get covered with snow (that sometimes doesn't melt for ages) and our kitchen is dark. Sad. But at least most of the world is brighter!
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Monday, December 17, 2012
Quick check in
After creating some wonder, I go quiet. Sorry. I am working on 3 projects that are super time-sensitive. One is a major project that will have significant impacts on a few people's lives. It's stressing me out! The other two would be a bigger deal, except the other is eclipsing them. But they will get their turn in the spotlight (and in my jaw and stomach, main stress holders). Anyway, the good part about them is "time-sensitive", so I'll hopefully be returning to life in a few days, at which time I'll get back to chronicling my life for you. :)
You can pray for me (and the clients and adjudicators involved in the case), if you so desire.
In the meantime, happy holiday days to you! (I keep forgetting that's what other folks are doing--good thing I go to church to touch base with humanity occasionally.)
You can pray for me (and the clients and adjudicators involved in the case), if you so desire.
In the meantime, happy holiday days to you! (I keep forgetting that's what other folks are doing--good thing I go to church to touch base with humanity occasionally.)
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Just for awhile
So my blog is going to go private for a little while (if I can figure out how to do that, which might be a big joke). A few comments:
1. Don't get too excited. Nothing too private or sensational is going to be published (at least not that I know of). I just need to know exactly who is reading my blog for the next several weeks.
2. If you don't want to come out of anonymity (and who does? I don't on many of the blogs I read--always sad when those folks go private), don't worry. I'll be back public in a few weeks. And you can resume reading my frequent, scintillating posts then. :)
3. Please let me know if you want an invite and how to email you. I know some of you will want to read and I know your gmail addresses, but others--not so much. RuthAnne, I'll need your address. Anyone else who thinks I don't know you read this/have your email address, let me know. Let's say this, if it's gone private and you aren't invited and want to be--let me know. Or just wait for a few weeks and it'll be available again.
4. To get me info you can email me if you know how or leave a comment with enough info that I can email you and I will get it, then delete the comment.
The end of what I thought would be a 2-3 line post.
1. Don't get too excited. Nothing too private or sensational is going to be published (at least not that I know of). I just need to know exactly who is reading my blog for the next several weeks.
2. If you don't want to come out of anonymity (and who does? I don't on many of the blogs I read--always sad when those folks go private), don't worry. I'll be back public in a few weeks. And you can resume reading my frequent, scintillating posts then. :)
3. Please let me know if you want an invite and how to email you. I know some of you will want to read and I know your gmail addresses, but others--not so much. RuthAnne, I'll need your address. Anyone else who thinks I don't know you read this/have your email address, let me know. Let's say this, if it's gone private and you aren't invited and want to be--let me know. Or just wait for a few weeks and it'll be available again.
4. To get me info you can email me if you know how or leave a comment with enough info that I can email you and I will get it, then delete the comment.
The end of what I thought would be a 2-3 line post.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Assertive
(The "schedule" function does not work for me apparently--or I can't work it, perhaps. Anyway, these last couple were supposed to be automatic but I've had to come back and publish them. So hard. Well, at least they're written already.)
I'm writing all these at the same time, even though I'll publish them a little spread out.
I don't know how much I'll go into this, but I do want to make note. I believe recording is a key, key way to learn the lessons the Lord is trying to teach me through different experiences.
One of the main things that I learned from Checketts Law is that I need to do a better job at standing up for myself. I'll stand up for others, but I have a hard time doing it for myself. Ironically, it makes me angry when others don't stand up for themselves. But anyway.
When I was talking to my dear friend Dorothee about this, she could relate--on all levels. Standing up for others, not for self, feeling bad about even sort-of doing it, etc. She'd talked to a counselor about it once who identified the problem as being a woman and Southern. Interesting thought. Though, I was talking to Roland about it and he has the same problem (I know this is true because I used it to my advantage throughout my life--and sometimes get mad when he wouldn't stand up to others, still).
For myself personally I also think a huge part of it is the desire to be Christlike. I want to be kind to others and I worry about hurting others. But I've come to understand more and more that in this, like in many things, I have to move forward with faith in Jesus Christ. He atoned for all sin, all sorrow and hurt. So maybe I will hurt others (though probably a lot less than I think), but I must allow the Atonement to work if I hurt others or myself. But I cannot stand still and do nothing out of fear of hurting others.
Dorothee's counselor tried to help her understand the difference between "assertive" and "aggressive" and those labels have helped me.
So, I'm trying. I'm telling my client (former) to quit telling me what to do and if he doesn't trust me to do my job to go find someone else (he did, thankfully). I've asked my roommate to get her stuff out of our living room (6 weeks after she'd moved in, it was time to move the moving boxes to her own room). I'm fighting with Comcast, instead of just acquiescing to their rottenness. And other things big and small. Most of them probably wouldn't seem like a big deal, but they require me to gird up my loins, consciously make and effort and STAND UP FOR MYSELF!
I think this one of the most important things I learned from Checketts Law and it was worth it for that. It's going to make me a better wife, a better mother, a better teacher, ward member, missionary, citizen, etc., etc.
Come back soon because I'll have another post that you need to see the next week or so.
I'm writing all these at the same time, even though I'll publish them a little spread out.
I don't know how much I'll go into this, but I do want to make note. I believe recording is a key, key way to learn the lessons the Lord is trying to teach me through different experiences.
One of the main things that I learned from Checketts Law is that I need to do a better job at standing up for myself. I'll stand up for others, but I have a hard time doing it for myself. Ironically, it makes me angry when others don't stand up for themselves. But anyway.
When I was talking to my dear friend Dorothee about this, she could relate--on all levels. Standing up for others, not for self, feeling bad about even sort-of doing it, etc. She'd talked to a counselor about it once who identified the problem as being a woman and Southern. Interesting thought. Though, I was talking to Roland about it and he has the same problem (I know this is true because I used it to my advantage throughout my life--and sometimes get mad when he wouldn't stand up to others, still).
For myself personally I also think a huge part of it is the desire to be Christlike. I want to be kind to others and I worry about hurting others. But I've come to understand more and more that in this, like in many things, I have to move forward with faith in Jesus Christ. He atoned for all sin, all sorrow and hurt. So maybe I will hurt others (though probably a lot less than I think), but I must allow the Atonement to work if I hurt others or myself. But I cannot stand still and do nothing out of fear of hurting others.
Dorothee's counselor tried to help her understand the difference between "assertive" and "aggressive" and those labels have helped me.
So, I'm trying. I'm telling my client (former) to quit telling me what to do and if he doesn't trust me to do my job to go find someone else (he did, thankfully). I've asked my roommate to get her stuff out of our living room (6 weeks after she'd moved in, it was time to move the moving boxes to her own room). I'm fighting with Comcast, instead of just acquiescing to their rottenness. And other things big and small. Most of them probably wouldn't seem like a big deal, but they require me to gird up my loins, consciously make and effort and STAND UP FOR MYSELF!
I think this one of the most important things I learned from Checketts Law and it was worth it for that. It's going to make me a better wife, a better mother, a better teacher, ward member, missionary, citizen, etc., etc.
Come back soon because I'll have another post that you need to see the next week or so.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
RIP: CL
Don't worry, Cheryl-lynn, the CL is not for you. Though it makes me think of you whenever I write it.
Well, I could rewrite my journal or transcribe a dozen conversations. But instead I'll just condense this and if you have questions, I'll answer them.
I have closed my law practice. No more Checketts Law.
It's been on my mind since the last few days of September. Over the course of about 3 days I went from full-speed ahead to almost a dead standstill. Then I pondered, weighed options, ignored it, etc. for about 6 weeks. On November 14 I made a final decision. Then slowly but surely I've been tying up loose ends.
Last week, I really set to and by the end of the week everything that I could control was done. (I'm still waiting for a couple of companies to finish their parts, but I'm done.) I have to pay December's rent (but not January - June's --- hooray!), so some of my things are stored in the office. But I'm out.
I will continue to do cases on the side, just like I have for the past 3 years, but won't work to get clients.
Why?, you ask. I hated the business part (and I don't use that word lightly, thank you, Mother). I like the law part, but I really disliked the business parts. Finding clients, everything related to billing, making business decisions, etc. Awful. I just want to go to work, do what someone tells me to do and get a paycheck.
This has been an option for a couple of years, so I'm glad I tried it. And I'm glad I'm done. If it had been for financial reasons, I would have kept going for awhile but I just hated the whole thing. And, as my father said, if I hated it now, I'll probably still hate it in 6 months. So why wait?
Despite that reality, it took me awhile to make the decision. Was I quitting too soon? Blobbity, blob. I was making myself sicker and more stressed out by the day and week. I was so stressed by it all that I was angry (I very, very seldom really get angry, so this was very disturbing to me); angry at everyone and everything--for a few days I seriously wanted to just hit people and things. So stressed that I literally could not sing (I'd heard of this, but didn't know it was real--it is. And I had a concert during that.)
Finally, one morning I said to myself: I would rather go sew straight lines, on a fixed schedule, earning minimum wage than go over to that office. And that was the "done" point for me. Realizing that I truly felt that way, I was done.
And then, as I told my family in an email, I felt like a quitter. But a very, very happy quitter. :)
Fortunately, over the past few years one of the main lessons I have been learning is to make my decisions based on what I and the Lord think and not worry about others. And that served me very well in this.
So, it's over. Not sure what's next. I have Northeastern still. And my morning tutoring job. And I'm looking into other things. Stay tuned.
As I cleaned my office last week (now two weeks after my decision), I saw the many, many things I did for the business. A lot! And it made me a little sad.
Sad, but not regretful. I wouldn't take back anything. Especially not the special lessons I've learned about myself and about God (and there have been a couple of very specific ones that I will carry forward from here).
Yes, that's a condensation. There are so many other thoughts, feelings, experiences, etc. So I promise, that is just a small summary.
Well, I could rewrite my journal or transcribe a dozen conversations. But instead I'll just condense this and if you have questions, I'll answer them.
I have closed my law practice. No more Checketts Law.
It's been on my mind since the last few days of September. Over the course of about 3 days I went from full-speed ahead to almost a dead standstill. Then I pondered, weighed options, ignored it, etc. for about 6 weeks. On November 14 I made a final decision. Then slowly but surely I've been tying up loose ends.
Last week, I really set to and by the end of the week everything that I could control was done. (I'm still waiting for a couple of companies to finish their parts, but I'm done.) I have to pay December's rent (but not January - June's --- hooray!), so some of my things are stored in the office. But I'm out.
I will continue to do cases on the side, just like I have for the past 3 years, but won't work to get clients.
Why?, you ask. I hated the business part (and I don't use that word lightly, thank you, Mother). I like the law part, but I really disliked the business parts. Finding clients, everything related to billing, making business decisions, etc. Awful. I just want to go to work, do what someone tells me to do and get a paycheck.
This has been an option for a couple of years, so I'm glad I tried it. And I'm glad I'm done. If it had been for financial reasons, I would have kept going for awhile but I just hated the whole thing. And, as my father said, if I hated it now, I'll probably still hate it in 6 months. So why wait?
Despite that reality, it took me awhile to make the decision. Was I quitting too soon? Blobbity, blob. I was making myself sicker and more stressed out by the day and week. I was so stressed by it all that I was angry (I very, very seldom really get angry, so this was very disturbing to me); angry at everyone and everything--for a few days I seriously wanted to just hit people and things. So stressed that I literally could not sing (I'd heard of this, but didn't know it was real--it is. And I had a concert during that.)
Finally, one morning I said to myself: I would rather go sew straight lines, on a fixed schedule, earning minimum wage than go over to that office. And that was the "done" point for me. Realizing that I truly felt that way, I was done.
And then, as I told my family in an email, I felt like a quitter. But a very, very happy quitter. :)
Fortunately, over the past few years one of the main lessons I have been learning is to make my decisions based on what I and the Lord think and not worry about others. And that served me very well in this.
So, it's over. Not sure what's next. I have Northeastern still. And my morning tutoring job. And I'm looking into other things. Stay tuned.
As I cleaned my office last week (now two weeks after my decision), I saw the many, many things I did for the business. A lot! And it made me a little sad.
Sad, but not regretful. I wouldn't take back anything. Especially not the special lessons I've learned about myself and about God (and there have been a couple of very specific ones that I will carry forward from here).
Yes, that's a condensation. There are so many other thoughts, feelings, experiences, etc. So I promise, that is just a small summary.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Sewing a straight line: Using the past to navigate the present (and future)
The following experience has been on my mind a lot and is going to come up in some future posts (I think), so I'm going to share it now so you'll have it for context.
In 2005 I graduated from BYU and moved to Arkansas. A month before graduation I still thought I was going to law school that fall. But then I decided to defer for a year and move to be near my family.. How that happened is another story, for another time; but it put me in the position of needing to look for a job.
I had been assured over and over again that I would have no problem getting a job at a bank or school or something else nice in Northwest Arkansas, because I was bi-lingual. But it didn't exactly go down like I'd expected. For one thing I didn't know what I wanted; for another I didn't know a lot about job searching; and for another I was only going to be there a year and was honest about that.
I looked for jobs during the few weeks before I went to El Salvador (a preplanned trip when I still thought I would just be hanging out for the summer). But I was leaving for a month+, so not super productive. Then I came back to town, first week of July.
On day 2 or 3 of being home, my mother's visiting teachee (Sister Titsworth) called to see if I wanted a temporary job at her husband's factory. President Titsworth was the stake president who released me as a missionary two years before; plus Sis. T and Mother were good friends so I knew them fairly well.
The job required me to sew. Sister T needed to go to Girls Camp, but they were busy so needed someone in the spot where she sometimes filled in. So it was available for a few weeks. They knew I was looking for another job. With all that understood, I said yes and started working a day or two later.
What a job! The company was a small assembly line that made upholstery samplers for furniture stores. My part of the assembly was to sew swatches of fabric to the cardboard that had all the information about it. I sat at a machine (an industrial one--love the speed!) and sewed for 8 hours a day. Just sewed straight lines. Unless the machine broke or something. It was the most mind-numbing thing I think I've ever done. I sang songs, sometimes yelled over the machines to the other women there, and mostly just tried hard not to think about how bored I was. Mind numbing, I tell you. (I'm sure it was worse because I'd just come from college and MTC teaching--very stimulating.) It also killed my neck and back. I wondered how the others could stand this (especially since they'd done it for years, even decades). After a few weeks, I realized their bodies had adjusted long ago and they didn't feel that.
I appreciated the opportunity to see how others live life. A large chunk of Americans work, or worked, in jobs like that and I knew nothing about it (remember my father was a farmer, then teacher--so while not a fancy professional, also not a shift worker). I'll be forever grateful I learned. 8-4:30, M-F, assembly line, minimum wage, half hour lunch, driving 45 minutes each way. Grateful to have a job. It really was a special experience to me because of being able to understand others better.
More, it was the Lord's way of taking care of me. The job was supposed to last 10-14 days. It lasted about 12 weeks--long enough for me to pay off some minor loans I owed, to take care of myself (while living at home), and to save up enough money so that when I finally got the right job I could move there without using loans. The timing of the job is still incredible to me. And Pres. T. was so wonderful and helpful. And I made some other dear friends.
Even as it un-folded I could see the tender mercies of the Lord playing out in my life. It was a hard time, but a good time.
In 2005 I graduated from BYU and moved to Arkansas. A month before graduation I still thought I was going to law school that fall. But then I decided to defer for a year and move to be near my family.. How that happened is another story, for another time; but it put me in the position of needing to look for a job.
I had been assured over and over again that I would have no problem getting a job at a bank or school or something else nice in Northwest Arkansas, because I was bi-lingual. But it didn't exactly go down like I'd expected. For one thing I didn't know what I wanted; for another I didn't know a lot about job searching; and for another I was only going to be there a year and was honest about that.
I looked for jobs during the few weeks before I went to El Salvador (a preplanned trip when I still thought I would just be hanging out for the summer). But I was leaving for a month+, so not super productive. Then I came back to town, first week of July.
On day 2 or 3 of being home, my mother's visiting teachee (Sister Titsworth) called to see if I wanted a temporary job at her husband's factory. President Titsworth was the stake president who released me as a missionary two years before; plus Sis. T and Mother were good friends so I knew them fairly well.
The job required me to sew. Sister T needed to go to Girls Camp, but they were busy so needed someone in the spot where she sometimes filled in. So it was available for a few weeks. They knew I was looking for another job. With all that understood, I said yes and started working a day or two later.
What a job! The company was a small assembly line that made upholstery samplers for furniture stores. My part of the assembly was to sew swatches of fabric to the cardboard that had all the information about it. I sat at a machine (an industrial one--love the speed!) and sewed for 8 hours a day. Just sewed straight lines. Unless the machine broke or something. It was the most mind-numbing thing I think I've ever done. I sang songs, sometimes yelled over the machines to the other women there, and mostly just tried hard not to think about how bored I was. Mind numbing, I tell you. (I'm sure it was worse because I'd just come from college and MTC teaching--very stimulating.) It also killed my neck and back. I wondered how the others could stand this (especially since they'd done it for years, even decades). After a few weeks, I realized their bodies had adjusted long ago and they didn't feel that.
I appreciated the opportunity to see how others live life. A large chunk of Americans work, or worked, in jobs like that and I knew nothing about it (remember my father was a farmer, then teacher--so while not a fancy professional, also not a shift worker). I'll be forever grateful I learned. 8-4:30, M-F, assembly line, minimum wage, half hour lunch, driving 45 minutes each way. Grateful to have a job. It really was a special experience to me because of being able to understand others better.
More, it was the Lord's way of taking care of me. The job was supposed to last 10-14 days. It lasted about 12 weeks--long enough for me to pay off some minor loans I owed, to take care of myself (while living at home), and to save up enough money so that when I finally got the right job I could move there without using loans. The timing of the job is still incredible to me. And Pres. T. was so wonderful and helpful. And I made some other dear friends.
Even as it un-folded I could see the tender mercies of the Lord playing out in my life. It was a hard time, but a good time.
Friday, November 23, 2012
One thing I've done lately
As you all know, I do not have the technological knowledge to actually put a video on my blog. But if you follow this link
I think you can watch a beautiful video. The Saturday after this day I was down there, with my yellow vest, helping. It was good to be there.
I may have more to say about this sometime. I may not.
I think you can watch a beautiful video. The Saturday after this day I was down there, with my yellow vest, helping. It was good to be there.
I may have more to say about this sometime. I may not.
Monday, November 12, 2012
32 fun things!
Okay, time for a fun post. Catch-up #2.
This is a report on 32 by 32!
I did them all and they served their purpose. We had a lot of fun, I did some crazy things, and it helped me heal and have fun.
Post will probably be a little long and I probably won't give too many details (so ask if something interests you). But here were go:
1. Celebrated 1 year with Jiyeon with pizza party!
Jiyeon is a brilliant scientist who works at Harvard with a ward friend of mine. I've been her English teacher/tutor/buddy for over a year now. I "teach" her every weekday morning at 7:00 a.m. She's fun and funny, about my age and we just get along really well. Oh, we meet on Skype (though she's only about 2 miles away), so sometimes involves rolling out of bed. We have fun. Currently we're reading the Little House books. SO FUN!
Anyway, when our year anniversary rolled along (almost every day for a year is a lot of time together) we decided to celebrate.
2. Went to another state: Connecticut.
Thanks to Rachel, we had a rental car (that'll show up as a theme) we used it to go visit dear friend Renee (from Spanish house a lot of years ago) in CT. Got to see her mom (visiting from Argentina), husband (Nate, who was a friend back then too), and her 4 cute kids. I've been a few times, but it was the first time Rachel had seen her in quite a few years.
Also, the drive down, on autumn-decorated back country roads was gorgeous.
3.Went WalMart shopping. Another rental car enabled trip (Boston and suburbs eschews them, but we made it far enough out). Lots of good things were bought.
4. Partied with Irena & Amber. Dear friends from my ward. We had a grand time. I ate so much I made myself sick. :(
5. Saw an apostle in person. Of course I knew I would before I put that on this list. Elder Andersen was here for a Harvard reunion and got roped into speaking at our annual Temple Workers Fireside. It was nice to hear him, though I enjoyed General Conference more. I liked hearing from his wife--I'm sure that part of the reason I've always been sure I liked her is because she's from Florida. Many good women come from Florida. :) And my favorite part was seeing all my dear temple presidency and matron/assistants. I love them so much and they love me. This was their farewell address and it still makes me sad.
6. Wrote an essay for the ward newsletter. Planned on linking to that (newsletter is digital), but I was too slow and it got updated and booted off (I was a little sad--the last two features have been up for about 4 months each, mine for 2 weeks). But it was based largely on this post from a few years ago.
7. Made apple turnovers. And they were as delicious as I remembered them being from the past.
8. Decorated the living room--at least part way. We got one wall done (thank you Rachel!) and then covered the other with party decorations that have stayed there ever since (they were made with the idea that they could stay at least for awhile). (foto - see #4)
9. Ate Brazilian food. Took Rachel to the pasteleria down the street. Still delicious. And fun to share, of course.
10. Started family history poster! It's awesome. I didn't take a picture, but it's covered one of my walls. Now to do something with it.....
11. Held a baby/played with a toddler. They're kind of both. 11 months (then, now a year) and one is starting to toddle. Dorothee's daughters have brought a lot of joy to my life this past year. We had lots of fun with them (and their dear mama).
12. Worked on Christmas calendar (did make it, but made progress--and opted to do the individual parts later when we couldn't be together)..
13. Did "at least one thing Rachel wanted to do". I was mocked more than once for this item. But, Rachel told me before she came that she didn't have any requests this time (she's been 3 times now); she just wanted to do whatever she could for me. But I wanted to do at least one thing that she wanted. During some conversation she'd expressed interested in going to an elementary school here. So we went to Renee's kids' school. It wasn't quite the same as the city schools, which I'd wanted to show her, but it was still fun.
14. Harvested the giant carrot. And all the rest of the carrots. And it was so much more fun to do it with someone else.
And then the giant carrot became my birthday cake (tradition--Rachel always makes me a carrot cake if she's anywhere near, anytime near to my birthday).
15. Watched "Chariots of Fire"! And it was muy excelente, as usual. (I'd seen, Rachel no) We'd planned the before Eric Liddle was discussed in conference--but a fun connection. And it's had new meaning because of Hyrum's firm stance to not play on Sundays (maybe more about that?).
16. Made rats. Out of my very own jalapenos (I've had hundreds from my garden--literally). And they were muy delicioso, as usual. For the joint party and enjoyed by many.
17. Found out about piano lessons. I can't do piano lessons without access to a piano for practice. What was I thinking? Put it back on the list of Someday.
18. Mailed the BofM to a woman I met a few weeks before. So glad I was able to.
19. Worked on Mother's BDay video with Aline & Rachel. We didn't make very good progress. But it did keep Rachel entertained for many hours, coming up with lyrics for the song.
20. Figured out my life with Rachel. Well, at least for the moment. Whatever it's final state, it was a wonderful couple of hours in the car in the sunshine while I cried and talked and felt understood.
21. Used leaf cookie cutters from ARE. She sent them with Rachel for my birthday two years ago. But I've never used them. They're very autumn-ish and I don't make cookies often, so just no good time. Anyway, we talked about different options and in the end used them for jigglers for the party. Perfect!
And then I used them again to decorate my cake (dip in food coloring and they make a lovely pattern on top).
22. Get 100 hugs. I had a chart on the wall. Some days were better than others, but I was still 37 short when October 19 rolled around. So the friends I partied with that night filled in the difference. Yes, I'm crazy. But I do love hugs. And I love family and friends who humor my wishes (more on that). I also got 32 emailed hugs from Rachel (she left on the 18th) and 12 blown hugs from Lietta and Laura and 100 synchronized hugs (from bears) on Skype from Brent & Nancy.
23. Got my feet tickled (thanks Rachel). If you don't already know this, I love having my feet tickled. Not many people love doing it, so I'm usually begging family and a few close friends to do it. [Random tidbit that needs to be documented and what better place? When we were roommates, I'd try to get Sherilyn to tickle my feet, but she didn't like touching them. I had a candy dish in the living room so one day she took out a dumdum sucker and used the stick to tickle. Then she stuck it in the side of the couch (so no one would eat it) and would pull it out every so often to tickle me. :)
Also Massaged someone else--Rachel.
24. Blew bubbles over a body of water. We'll come back to this.
25. Wrote a thank you to Mother and Father. :)
26. Read a stack of children's books--some at the library, some at home. Good times
27. Met someone new. Emily at the joint bday party (Amber's friend); Alex from the car rental place; and Ieva at an AILA meeting (that was probably the most legit one--we even met up again the next week).
28. Danced!! Danced with Nadine. Dorothee puts music on for them and they start showing their moves--so cute! Then I picked Nadine up and danced around with her. Lots of fun.
No foto, because the camera battery died. But see my partner above.
We also danced a little at my house during cake time on my birthday.
29. Wrote a letter to Baby Benson. Wanted to before he left the MTC. Procrastinated so Dear Elder had to make it hard copy, but at least it wasn't an email.
30. Hiked in the woods by the fells near-ish my town. AND Went on a long bike ride along the Charles River. Lovely.
No foto because my camera was dead and I haven't gotten Rachel's fotos. Too bad, because it was lovely.
31. Wore my tiara in public. Oh yes, I did. And it scored us a really delicious flan at the yummy Peruvian place we went to for birthday dinner.
32. Laughed for at least a minute straight. With Rachel and Aline combined it's hard for it not to happen.
Bubbles (24). This was my undone item. When Rachel and I went biking, we planned to do it at the Charles River. And we were at the perfect spot. But I forgot to get bubbles before leaving the house. And then no stores had them on the way to the river (apparently they're a summer item only. What?). Bought them at the dollar store on the way home, but no bodies of water. Despite suggestions of bath tubs and puddles, I wanted real water and it was undone.
Then, October 19, I thought I'd stop on the bridge I cross on the way to work and blow some. Unfortunately, the night before my bike got a flat tire and I had to bus to work. Of course it didn't stop anywhere near the bridge, so still no bubbles. :(
Little sad to be so close, but no.
So, after my birthday dinner, cake, dancing, etc. my dear Mollie and Anne loaded me and my bubbles up. We parked, then walked out onto a bridge over the Mystic River (in the middle of the night) and I blew bubbles to my heart's content. They also gave me my last couple of hugs and at about 11 pm on October 19 I finished my list.
This is a report on 32 by 32!
I did them all and they served their purpose. We had a lot of fun, I did some crazy things, and it helped me heal and have fun.
Post will probably be a little long and I probably won't give too many details (so ask if something interests you). But here were go:
1. Celebrated 1 year with Jiyeon with pizza party!
Jiyeon is a brilliant scientist who works at Harvard with a ward friend of mine. I've been her English teacher/tutor/buddy for over a year now. I "teach" her every weekday morning at 7:00 a.m. She's fun and funny, about my age and we just get along really well. Oh, we meet on Skype (though she's only about 2 miles away), so sometimes involves rolling out of bed. We have fun. Currently we're reading the Little House books. SO FUN!Anyway, when our year anniversary rolled along (almost every day for a year is a lot of time together) we decided to celebrate.
2. Went to another state: Connecticut.
Thanks to Rachel, we had a rental car (that'll show up as a theme) we used it to go visit dear friend Renee (from Spanish house a lot of years ago) in CT. Got to see her mom (visiting from Argentina), husband (Nate, who was a friend back then too), and her 4 cute kids. I've been a few times, but it was the first time Rachel had seen her in quite a few years.Also, the drive down, on autumn-decorated back country roads was gorgeous.
3.Went WalMart shopping. Another rental car enabled trip (Boston and suburbs eschews them, but we made it far enough out). Lots of good things were bought.
4. Partied with Irena & Amber. Dear friends from my ward. We had a grand time. I ate so much I made myself sick. :(
 |
| Me, Amber, Irena (the 3 front and center) |
5. Saw an apostle in person. Of course I knew I would before I put that on this list. Elder Andersen was here for a Harvard reunion and got roped into speaking at our annual Temple Workers Fireside. It was nice to hear him, though I enjoyed General Conference more. I liked hearing from his wife--I'm sure that part of the reason I've always been sure I liked her is because she's from Florida. Many good women come from Florida. :) And my favorite part was seeing all my dear temple presidency and matron/assistants. I love them so much and they love me. This was their farewell address and it still makes me sad.
6. Wrote an essay for the ward newsletter. Planned on linking to that (newsletter is digital), but I was too slow and it got updated and booted off (I was a little sad--the last two features have been up for about 4 months each, mine for 2 weeks). But it was based largely on this post from a few years ago.
7. Made apple turnovers. And they were as delicious as I remembered them being from the past.
8. Decorated the living room--at least part way. We got one wall done (thank you Rachel!) and then covered the other with party decorations that have stayed there ever since (they were made with the idea that they could stay at least for awhile). (foto - see #4)
9. Ate Brazilian food. Took Rachel to the pasteleria down the street. Still delicious. And fun to share, of course.
10. Started family history poster! It's awesome. I didn't take a picture, but it's covered one of my walls. Now to do something with it.....
11. Held a baby/played with a toddler. They're kind of both. 11 months (then, now a year) and one is starting to toddle. Dorothee's daughters have brought a lot of joy to my life this past year. We had lots of fun with them (and their dear mama).
12. Worked on Christmas calendar (did make it, but made progress--and opted to do the individual parts later when we couldn't be together)..
13. Did "at least one thing Rachel wanted to do". I was mocked more than once for this item. But, Rachel told me before she came that she didn't have any requests this time (she's been 3 times now); she just wanted to do whatever she could for me. But I wanted to do at least one thing that she wanted. During some conversation she'd expressed interested in going to an elementary school here. So we went to Renee's kids' school. It wasn't quite the same as the city schools, which I'd wanted to show her, but it was still fun.
14. Harvested the giant carrot. And all the rest of the carrots. And it was so much more fun to do it with someone else.
And then the giant carrot became my birthday cake (tradition--Rachel always makes me a carrot cake if she's anywhere near, anytime near to my birthday).
15. Watched "Chariots of Fire"! And it was muy excelente, as usual. (I'd seen, Rachel no) We'd planned the before Eric Liddle was discussed in conference--but a fun connection. And it's had new meaning because of Hyrum's firm stance to not play on Sundays (maybe more about that?).
16. Made rats. Out of my very own jalapenos (I've had hundreds from my garden--literally). And they were muy delicioso, as usual. For the joint party and enjoyed by many.
17. Found out about piano lessons. I can't do piano lessons without access to a piano for practice. What was I thinking? Put it back on the list of Someday.
18. Mailed the BofM to a woman I met a few weeks before. So glad I was able to.
19. Worked on Mother's BDay video with Aline & Rachel. We didn't make very good progress. But it did keep Rachel entertained for many hours, coming up with lyrics for the song.
20. Figured out my life with Rachel. Well, at least for the moment. Whatever it's final state, it was a wonderful couple of hours in the car in the sunshine while I cried and talked and felt understood.
21. Used leaf cookie cutters from ARE. She sent them with Rachel for my birthday two years ago. But I've never used them. They're very autumn-ish and I don't make cookies often, so just no good time. Anyway, we talked about different options and in the end used them for jigglers for the party. Perfect!
22. Get 100 hugs. I had a chart on the wall. Some days were better than others, but I was still 37 short when October 19 rolled around. So the friends I partied with that night filled in the difference. Yes, I'm crazy. But I do love hugs. And I love family and friends who humor my wishes (more on that). I also got 32 emailed hugs from Rachel (she left on the 18th) and 12 blown hugs from Lietta and Laura and 100 synchronized hugs (from bears) on Skype from Brent & Nancy.
23. Got my feet tickled (thanks Rachel). If you don't already know this, I love having my feet tickled. Not many people love doing it, so I'm usually begging family and a few close friends to do it. [Random tidbit that needs to be documented and what better place? When we were roommates, I'd try to get Sherilyn to tickle my feet, but she didn't like touching them. I had a candy dish in the living room so one day she took out a dumdum sucker and used the stick to tickle. Then she stuck it in the side of the couch (so no one would eat it) and would pull it out every so often to tickle me. :)
Also Massaged someone else--Rachel.
24. Blew bubbles over a body of water. We'll come back to this.
25. Wrote a thank you to Mother and Father. :)
26. Read a stack of children's books--some at the library, some at home. Good times
27. Met someone new. Emily at the joint bday party (Amber's friend); Alex from the car rental place; and Ieva at an AILA meeting (that was probably the most legit one--we even met up again the next week).
28. Danced!! Danced with Nadine. Dorothee puts music on for them and they start showing their moves--so cute! Then I picked Nadine up and danced around with her. Lots of fun.
No foto, because the camera battery died. But see my partner above.
We also danced a little at my house during cake time on my birthday.
29. Wrote a letter to Baby Benson. Wanted to before he left the MTC. Procrastinated so Dear Elder had to make it hard copy, but at least it wasn't an email.
30. Hiked in the woods by the fells near-ish my town. AND Went on a long bike ride along the Charles River. Lovely.
No foto because my camera was dead and I haven't gotten Rachel's fotos. Too bad, because it was lovely.
31. Wore my tiara in public. Oh yes, I did. And it scored us a really delicious flan at the yummy Peruvian place we went to for birthday dinner.
32. Laughed for at least a minute straight. With Rachel and Aline combined it's hard for it not to happen.
Bubbles (24). This was my undone item. When Rachel and I went biking, we planned to do it at the Charles River. And we were at the perfect spot. But I forgot to get bubbles before leaving the house. And then no stores had them on the way to the river (apparently they're a summer item only. What?). Bought them at the dollar store on the way home, but no bodies of water. Despite suggestions of bath tubs and puddles, I wanted real water and it was undone.
Then, October 19, I thought I'd stop on the bridge I cross on the way to work and blow some. Unfortunately, the night before my bike got a flat tire and I had to bus to work. Of course it didn't stop anywhere near the bridge, so still no bubbles. :(
Little sad to be so close, but no.
So, after my birthday dinner, cake, dancing, etc. my dear Mollie and Anne loaded me and my bubbles up. We parked, then walked out onto a bridge over the Mystic River (in the middle of the night) and I blew bubbles to my heart's content. They also gave me my last couple of hugs and at about 11 pm on October 19 I finished my list.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
And then...
Guess who called me this morning.
My mother.
With Father in the background. Apparently she had a dream about me last night (I don't know what about--didn't think to ask because I was caught off guard and then had to use the precious minutes to catch her up on one aspect of my life and then get some Thanksgiving dinner tips). Anyway, something about the dream was strong enough that Father thought she should call me.
Strange timing, that's what I have to say. They don't read my blog (not generally and I don't think they do in Panama, at least they've never mentioned it), so I just found it--something.
Also, thank you for your kind comments. And for the virtual hugs. :) Meg--more coming to you in email soon. Sara--I don't know when I'm visiting. I thought maybe in December, but that's uncertain. Deanna--you and Charles will be awesome full-time missionaries. :) Suzan--more in an email.
My mother.
With Father in the background. Apparently she had a dream about me last night (I don't know what about--didn't think to ask because I was caught off guard and then had to use the precious minutes to catch her up on one aspect of my life and then get some Thanksgiving dinner tips). Anyway, something about the dream was strong enough that Father thought she should call me.
Strange timing, that's what I have to say. They don't read my blog (not generally and I don't think they do in Panama, at least they've never mentioned it), so I just found it--something.
Also, thank you for your kind comments. And for the virtual hugs. :) Meg--more coming to you in email soon. Sara--I don't know when I'm visiting. I thought maybe in December, but that's uncertain. Deanna--you and Charles will be awesome full-time missionaries. :) Suzan--more in an email.
Monday, November 5, 2012
Gozo
(Catch-up post #1, from end of September.)
As I think I've said before, back in August my parents left on a mission to Panama. They're serving for 23 months in Panama City, assigned principally to work with the Perpetual Education Fund (for more on that, follow the link--it's amazing!).
My parents have planned and prepared to serve a mission for as long as I've known them. Since they were married; well, probably since before that. For several years now they've been counting down until Benson could leave on a mission so they could go. And then they spent the past couple of years preparing medically, etc. Finally, it was time. And they've been giddy excited ever since they got their call. This summer Mother & Father were asked to speak to Rachel's Ward Prayer group and a few of us went to hear. I remember Mother saying, "This is a dream come true for us." And you could see it in their whole countenances--it is a dream come true.
For me, however, it has been really rough. I think I said this before, but my 2nd thought after hearing about their call was, Wow, 2 years is a really long time. I've always loved my parents (well, apparently--according to my journal--when I 11 I didn't realize I did), but I've become especially close to them over the past 3 years. During these years as I've been un/underemployed and have felt very lonely and have just had a really rough time, my parents have been the rock that kept me from drowning. Not to minimize the very real power of the Savior and his Atonement. But they were the people who have been my world. I talked to Mother A LOT. Sometimes multiple times a day, sometimes for hours at a time. I called about everything and nothing at all. And I talked to Father fairly often too. He was the one who would call, if I hadn't called for a few days, just to make sure I was okay (if 4 days went by they checked because I called that often). I don't know how to say it, but they've been there for everything. And I've become very reliant on them.
In the months and weeks leading up to their mission, I tried preparing myself, I tried steeling myself against what was coming. But the truth was, I was already starting to mourn. I think people think I'm crazy (well, I probably am), but it felt a little like they were dead. I mean, like death, they're somewhere I can't see them doing good things but not where I can get to them. (It did not help that at Christmas Mother gave away a lot of her belongings--why not divide them now? Um, because it makes it seem like you're dead. I had a complete melt-down and just went and cried in the room for an hour or so. And how to explain to Mother how I feel when she came to check on me?) I grew up as part of a family and they're the only family I have left. My siblings are divided and doing their own thing; I love them of course and we're close still. But we're an extended family. My parents, however, were still mine. Until the mission took them.
I couldn't share much of that with my parents--the only ones who I've really shared so many raw emotions with over the past few years. They're so happy. I'm not going to tell them how I'm not.
They went to the MTC and were in the US for two weeks. I talked to Father on Night one and Mother once on Day 3 but then we never connected again. As the end of the US came up, I resigned myself to the fact that I hadn't gotten to talk to them. Until the day they flew out. I was in the kitchen canning all that morning; unfortunately my phone was in my bedroom when they called two different times trying to talk to me before they left. When I heard their messages, I lost it all over again. I cried so hard for so long that I made myself sick (literally). I was hurt and angry.
And I felt that way for a long while to come. On top of everything else, I felt guilty. Because I love my parents and I'm sorry that I'm so upset by something that makes them so happy. Because I love, love, LOVE my Savior and am so thankful that my parents get to serve him, to be his special representatives, to help others come to Him. I really am. And it contradicts so strongly with my own selfish feelings, that the conflict just adds another level of hurt.
In the first few weeks the emails from them were very brief. My mother, who has written long, wonderful letters to all of us for fifteen years (since Roland left on his mission) suddenly wrote these brief little emails. I mean the busiest sibling missionary did better than that. I probably have no idea what I'm really talking about, but I think that the mourning that I went through then really ought to lessen the mourning when they die. I'm serious.
I cried fairly often and still felt bitter. Contradicted with gratitude for them, of course.
Finally, in September things started to change. I got to talk to them on Father's birthday (they were distracted, but at least I could hear their voices). Mother, then Father, then Mother sent long emails that filled in the voids. Father is keeping his journal digitally and he emails installments every month or so. It is absolutely delightful!! I suspect, before this is all over I really will say that this helped me grow close to my parents in ways I wouldn't have otherwise. [little side note: so many fun miracles as they learn the language and adapt to living in a city and doing their job on a computer (mostly that's Mother) and other things. But we're talking about ME here, not them. :) ]
But what really changed things was seeing this video. I'm even going to share it with you.
Panama (all the stakes and district) hosted this Welfare Fair. (It's all centered around the Church's 6 provident living/self-reliance focuses--which is my calling and I quizzed my parents on them last Christmas--love that it's part of their lives now!) This is a fun YouTube video that some one made of the event.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
(sorry that I have no idea how to put the video here, but you can link just fine I'm sure)
You'll see my parents--it's pretty obvious. Mother only appears once, but Father is there multiple times. And look at him. I've never seen Father so stress-free, so happy, so full of JOY! He carries his stress inside and even in joyful situations, he's usually worrying about something to make things work for the rest of us. It's gone. He is just full of joy. Combined with the image I have of Mother at the Ward Prayer, I see joy like Christ promises us when he serve him. Okay, go watch the video now.
After watching the video, I cried again. Only this time, for the first time, they were tears of joy.
And I've been okay ever since then. I think the tears of joy were tears of healing too. I've also worked, as I did on my own mission 10+ years ago, to shift my reliance back to God. And I'm okay.
p.s. As Rachel and I discussed, one of the happy parts of the video is seeing the reality that my parents (particularly my father) are learning to love the Latin culture that has been such a big part of many of our lives. It connects us a little more. And bring some more joy.
As I think I've said before, back in August my parents left on a mission to Panama. They're serving for 23 months in Panama City, assigned principally to work with the Perpetual Education Fund (for more on that, follow the link--it's amazing!).
My parents have planned and prepared to serve a mission for as long as I've known them. Since they were married; well, probably since before that. For several years now they've been counting down until Benson could leave on a mission so they could go. And then they spent the past couple of years preparing medically, etc. Finally, it was time. And they've been giddy excited ever since they got their call. This summer Mother & Father were asked to speak to Rachel's Ward Prayer group and a few of us went to hear. I remember Mother saying, "This is a dream come true for us." And you could see it in their whole countenances--it is a dream come true.
For me, however, it has been really rough. I think I said this before, but my 2nd thought after hearing about their call was, Wow, 2 years is a really long time. I've always loved my parents (well, apparently--according to my journal--when I 11 I didn't realize I did), but I've become especially close to them over the past 3 years. During these years as I've been un/underemployed and have felt very lonely and have just had a really rough time, my parents have been the rock that kept me from drowning. Not to minimize the very real power of the Savior and his Atonement. But they were the people who have been my world. I talked to Mother A LOT. Sometimes multiple times a day, sometimes for hours at a time. I called about everything and nothing at all. And I talked to Father fairly often too. He was the one who would call, if I hadn't called for a few days, just to make sure I was okay (if 4 days went by they checked because I called that often). I don't know how to say it, but they've been there for everything. And I've become very reliant on them.
In the months and weeks leading up to their mission, I tried preparing myself, I tried steeling myself against what was coming. But the truth was, I was already starting to mourn. I think people think I'm crazy (well, I probably am), but it felt a little like they were dead. I mean, like death, they're somewhere I can't see them doing good things but not where I can get to them. (It did not help that at Christmas Mother gave away a lot of her belongings--why not divide them now? Um, because it makes it seem like you're dead. I had a complete melt-down and just went and cried in the room for an hour or so. And how to explain to Mother how I feel when she came to check on me?) I grew up as part of a family and they're the only family I have left. My siblings are divided and doing their own thing; I love them of course and we're close still. But we're an extended family. My parents, however, were still mine. Until the mission took them.
I couldn't share much of that with my parents--the only ones who I've really shared so many raw emotions with over the past few years. They're so happy. I'm not going to tell them how I'm not.
They went to the MTC and were in the US for two weeks. I talked to Father on Night one and Mother once on Day 3 but then we never connected again. As the end of the US came up, I resigned myself to the fact that I hadn't gotten to talk to them. Until the day they flew out. I was in the kitchen canning all that morning; unfortunately my phone was in my bedroom when they called two different times trying to talk to me before they left. When I heard their messages, I lost it all over again. I cried so hard for so long that I made myself sick (literally). I was hurt and angry.
And I felt that way for a long while to come. On top of everything else, I felt guilty. Because I love my parents and I'm sorry that I'm so upset by something that makes them so happy. Because I love, love, LOVE my Savior and am so thankful that my parents get to serve him, to be his special representatives, to help others come to Him. I really am. And it contradicts so strongly with my own selfish feelings, that the conflict just adds another level of hurt.
In the first few weeks the emails from them were very brief. My mother, who has written long, wonderful letters to all of us for fifteen years (since Roland left on his mission) suddenly wrote these brief little emails. I mean the busiest sibling missionary did better than that. I probably have no idea what I'm really talking about, but I think that the mourning that I went through then really ought to lessen the mourning when they die. I'm serious.
I cried fairly often and still felt bitter. Contradicted with gratitude for them, of course.
Finally, in September things started to change. I got to talk to them on Father's birthday (they were distracted, but at least I could hear their voices). Mother, then Father, then Mother sent long emails that filled in the voids. Father is keeping his journal digitally and he emails installments every month or so. It is absolutely delightful!! I suspect, before this is all over I really will say that this helped me grow close to my parents in ways I wouldn't have otherwise. [little side note: so many fun miracles as they learn the language and adapt to living in a city and doing their job on a computer (mostly that's Mother) and other things. But we're talking about ME here, not them. :) ]
But what really changed things was seeing this video. I'm even going to share it with you.
Panama (all the stakes and district) hosted this Welfare Fair. (It's all centered around the Church's 6 provident living/self-reliance focuses--which is my calling and I quizzed my parents on them last Christmas--love that it's part of their lives now!) This is a fun YouTube video that some one made of the event.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
(sorry that I have no idea how to put the video here, but you can link just fine I'm sure)
You'll see my parents--it's pretty obvious. Mother only appears once, but Father is there multiple times. And look at him. I've never seen Father so stress-free, so happy, so full of JOY! He carries his stress inside and even in joyful situations, he's usually worrying about something to make things work for the rest of us. It's gone. He is just full of joy. Combined with the image I have of Mother at the Ward Prayer, I see joy like Christ promises us when he serve him. Okay, go watch the video now.
After watching the video, I cried again. Only this time, for the first time, they were tears of joy.
And I've been okay ever since then. I think the tears of joy were tears of healing too. I've also worked, as I did on my own mission 10+ years ago, to shift my reliance back to God. And I'm okay.
p.s. As Rachel and I discussed, one of the happy parts of the video is seeing the reality that my parents (particularly my father) are learning to love the Latin culture that has been such a big part of many of our lives. It connects us a little more. And bring some more joy.
Monday, October 29, 2012
Alive in the storm(ish)
I'm alive and well, if any of you were wondering. And because it's a note-worthy day I'm just going to free write a few things on my mind.
I'm pretty sure this is a combination of being a Carolinian raised by a Floridian, but I rather like tropical storms. I know there's danger and I'm truly sorry for the people who experience destruction of any sort (especially death). I also hope that nothing terrible happens to us, but right now I'm enjoying my day in and hoping that school gets canceled tomorrow too (definitely canceled today--but I don't teach on Monday). I'm also glad that I'm in Boston and not further south (might change my mind before this over, but that's how I feel now).
My roommate thinks I'm crazy, but it feels exciting to me. I mean--there's even confetti!! The colored leaves are blowing all over the place and they're really gorgeous. I am a little sad the storm is taking our leaves so much more quickly than they would've gone otherwise, but since it is, I'll enjoy it.
Speaking of which, I'm enjoying the fact that the strongest part of this storm is happening right in the middle of the day. Most of the hurricanes/tropical storms from my growing up happened at night (at least the strongest part) and I missed a lot of the beauty. So it's fun to see, even if it's quite weak compared to actually being in the storm.
My biggest concern about our well-being is that we'll lose power and it won't come back before we feel like snow women (lows are only in the 40s, so we won't actually freeze, but that's still pretty chilly--and decreases what you feel like doing (right now we're all very productive but if we have to bundled up--what then?)). This has always been a big concern of mine about living in modern houses/apartments & living in towns. Growing up we had fireplaces and such (whether as main source or auxiliary) , so if power went out we still had warmth and some kind of cooked food. Ever since going to BYU, the lack of non-electric heating has worried me. When I have my own house, I will rectify this. But now I just hope for the past (and in this case feel grateful that it won't be freezing). The one thing that makes me feel a little better is that I do live in town (this is the flip side of town limiting my fuel sources). If power goes out we'll probably get a lot faster than we did in rural areas.
Second to heat, I fear my freezer being out for a long time. Especially since it won't get down to freezing. (ha!) Fortunately, I don't have a large freezer so wouldn't lose too much. But I preserved a lot of things this summer and hope they survive. (My creations, I feel attached--probably too much.) Another thing for my future--when I finally arrive at the point where I can have a deep freeze (of any size), I will also have a generator. I'm well acquainted with defrosted deep freezes and it is not a pretty thing. Oh, the memories (just imagine: heat + pounds and pounds of food).
I also hope my garden survives this. It's still thriving out there. Blossoms (that probably won't become fruit--but still, they indicate how happy my plants are) and lots of fruit. I went out this morning and took down all the cages so that my tomatoes wouldn't be whipped around by the wind. The vines are now all on the ground, but flooding might still hurt them. And my peppers are free standing, so I don't know how they'll do. If I got nothing else out of my garden, it would have been a wonderful success. But STILL, those are my babies and I want them to be okay.
I'm grateful to have an emergency preparedness kit--mostly for the flashlight. I don't think we'll be evacuating, so most of the rest is irrelevant. Although, I was just thinking about what we'd do if a chunk of our house ripped off or got crushed (these do happen, though more likely in a real storm; I experienced it in Tarboro). And I thought--well, I have a couple of tarps--hooray kit!! We couldn't cover a whole house, but we could cover a hole.
Part of the reason I feel peace is because my family is far away from all of this (see below for the flip side). I don't have to worry about anyone that I really, really care about. Glad.
I said we were being productive, right? Well, my roommates are. I'm not. Not really. I've napped, eaten, bothered my roommates, and mostly missed my family and wished they were here to play with me. That's what stay-home storms are for. I did get to talk to Rachel. But it's not the same as having them here with me. And it's a little sad, because when I consciously think about it, I also know that they'll never be here again either. They're gone. At least I had them.
Which brings me to a couple of other thoughts. I know that one of the main reasons storms don't scare me is because of my knowledge of the plan of salvation. Lately more than ever, I have been acutely aware of the brevity of mortality, its true purpose. The very worse things that could happen from a storm aren't that bad; death is just a passing. And the intermediate bad things, we'll recover from sooner or later. We had a wonderful stake conference this past weekend. The high from that is part of the reason I'm so happy and at peace and not worried. I'm prepared and I'm not afraid.
One of the things on my mind is related, though unrelated. Nancy's mother-in-law passed away this past week. She was only in her 40's. She was diagnosed with cancer last year and given 1-2 years to live. But the actual end was still rather sudden. BUT Brent got to spend some good time with her in the last few days, so it feels better to them. It makes you think though. I was thinking about Brent and realizing that he is either the exact same age or one year away from it, as being the same age as my mother was when her mother passed away. Unlike my mother, Brent is lucky to have a wife with him (my mother didn't marry for 3 or 4 years after). But still, it makes me sad to think about. I'm glad she got to be there at the temple this summer, for their sealing. And again, grateful for a knowledge of the plan of salvation.
On my list of things to do today is catching up on blog posts (I have at least 4 that need to be written--this one was not one of those). But I'm really supposed to clean room/organize food storage that lives in my room. Then I get to blog. That's another reason I've been wandering around bothering people and eating--I don't want to do the task I'm supposed to do. :)
A final (maybe) thought. Listening to the Spirit can be hard. Still. Even after all these years, lots of experience, and--I think--a pretty refined ability to hear. I learned years ago that if I felt I should do something I didn't really want, it was probably a prompting. It took some time and practice, but I got it down. Now I'm trying to learn to distinguish my wants and the Spirit when they seem paralleled. Let me explain. When I continue to feel the need to go eat another apple dumpling--it's probably just me wanting it, right? But what if I keep feeling it, even when I've talked myself out of it? Probably still my want, but how do I really know? Okay, well now, change the situation to something less crazy than an apple dumpling. I've had a couple of them in the past weeks and some of them it took quite a while before I realized--this is a prompting, not just my desires or laziness or whatever! And today I'm experiencing the consequences of one of those missed promptings. Last week I kept wanting to go get a book from the library. It's the next in a series that I'm trying to read slowly. No need to waste two weeks of my life reading book after book. So I've spaced them out, and tried to mostly use my time on other things. But all last week I thought about it. More than once I thought--I almost feel like it's a prompting to do this (in part because it repeated itself). But I know it's really just me wanting to escape reality and no, I don't need to read, I need to do X, Y, & Z. But today, I'm pretty sure it was a prompting, not an important one, but still. Pretty sure that today would be better if I had that book. (Library is closed, of course.) Wish I had listened. Really do.
And that's about all. Longest unimportant blog post, but I'll sure enjoy it in the years to come. :)
I'm pretty sure this is a combination of being a Carolinian raised by a Floridian, but I rather like tropical storms. I know there's danger and I'm truly sorry for the people who experience destruction of any sort (especially death). I also hope that nothing terrible happens to us, but right now I'm enjoying my day in and hoping that school gets canceled tomorrow too (definitely canceled today--but I don't teach on Monday). I'm also glad that I'm in Boston and not further south (might change my mind before this over, but that's how I feel now).
My roommate thinks I'm crazy, but it feels exciting to me. I mean--there's even confetti!! The colored leaves are blowing all over the place and they're really gorgeous. I am a little sad the storm is taking our leaves so much more quickly than they would've gone otherwise, but since it is, I'll enjoy it.
Speaking of which, I'm enjoying the fact that the strongest part of this storm is happening right in the middle of the day. Most of the hurricanes/tropical storms from my growing up happened at night (at least the strongest part) and I missed a lot of the beauty. So it's fun to see, even if it's quite weak compared to actually being in the storm.
My biggest concern about our well-being is that we'll lose power and it won't come back before we feel like snow women (lows are only in the 40s, so we won't actually freeze, but that's still pretty chilly--and decreases what you feel like doing (right now we're all very productive but if we have to bundled up--what then?)). This has always been a big concern of mine about living in modern houses/apartments & living in towns. Growing up we had fireplaces and such (whether as main source or auxiliary) , so if power went out we still had warmth and some kind of cooked food. Ever since going to BYU, the lack of non-electric heating has worried me. When I have my own house, I will rectify this. But now I just hope for the past (and in this case feel grateful that it won't be freezing). The one thing that makes me feel a little better is that I do live in town (this is the flip side of town limiting my fuel sources). If power goes out we'll probably get a lot faster than we did in rural areas.
Second to heat, I fear my freezer being out for a long time. Especially since it won't get down to freezing. (ha!) Fortunately, I don't have a large freezer so wouldn't lose too much. But I preserved a lot of things this summer and hope they survive. (My creations, I feel attached--probably too much.) Another thing for my future--when I finally arrive at the point where I can have a deep freeze (of any size), I will also have a generator. I'm well acquainted with defrosted deep freezes and it is not a pretty thing. Oh, the memories (just imagine: heat + pounds and pounds of food).
I also hope my garden survives this. It's still thriving out there. Blossoms (that probably won't become fruit--but still, they indicate how happy my plants are) and lots of fruit. I went out this morning and took down all the cages so that my tomatoes wouldn't be whipped around by the wind. The vines are now all on the ground, but flooding might still hurt them. And my peppers are free standing, so I don't know how they'll do. If I got nothing else out of my garden, it would have been a wonderful success. But STILL, those are my babies and I want them to be okay.
I'm grateful to have an emergency preparedness kit--mostly for the flashlight. I don't think we'll be evacuating, so most of the rest is irrelevant. Although, I was just thinking about what we'd do if a chunk of our house ripped off or got crushed (these do happen, though more likely in a real storm; I experienced it in Tarboro). And I thought--well, I have a couple of tarps--hooray kit!! We couldn't cover a whole house, but we could cover a hole.
Part of the reason I feel peace is because my family is far away from all of this (see below for the flip side). I don't have to worry about anyone that I really, really care about. Glad.
I said we were being productive, right? Well, my roommates are. I'm not. Not really. I've napped, eaten, bothered my roommates, and mostly missed my family and wished they were here to play with me. That's what stay-home storms are for. I did get to talk to Rachel. But it's not the same as having them here with me. And it's a little sad, because when I consciously think about it, I also know that they'll never be here again either. They're gone. At least I had them.
Which brings me to a couple of other thoughts. I know that one of the main reasons storms don't scare me is because of my knowledge of the plan of salvation. Lately more than ever, I have been acutely aware of the brevity of mortality, its true purpose. The very worse things that could happen from a storm aren't that bad; death is just a passing. And the intermediate bad things, we'll recover from sooner or later. We had a wonderful stake conference this past weekend. The high from that is part of the reason I'm so happy and at peace and not worried. I'm prepared and I'm not afraid.
One of the things on my mind is related, though unrelated. Nancy's mother-in-law passed away this past week. She was only in her 40's. She was diagnosed with cancer last year and given 1-2 years to live. But the actual end was still rather sudden. BUT Brent got to spend some good time with her in the last few days, so it feels better to them. It makes you think though. I was thinking about Brent and realizing that he is either the exact same age or one year away from it, as being the same age as my mother was when her mother passed away. Unlike my mother, Brent is lucky to have a wife with him (my mother didn't marry for 3 or 4 years after). But still, it makes me sad to think about. I'm glad she got to be there at the temple this summer, for their sealing. And again, grateful for a knowledge of the plan of salvation.
On my list of things to do today is catching up on blog posts (I have at least 4 that need to be written--this one was not one of those). But I'm really supposed to clean room/organize food storage that lives in my room. Then I get to blog. That's another reason I've been wandering around bothering people and eating--I don't want to do the task I'm supposed to do. :)
A final (maybe) thought. Listening to the Spirit can be hard. Still. Even after all these years, lots of experience, and--I think--a pretty refined ability to hear. I learned years ago that if I felt I should do something I didn't really want, it was probably a prompting. It took some time and practice, but I got it down. Now I'm trying to learn to distinguish my wants and the Spirit when they seem paralleled. Let me explain. When I continue to feel the need to go eat another apple dumpling--it's probably just me wanting it, right? But what if I keep feeling it, even when I've talked myself out of it? Probably still my want, but how do I really know? Okay, well now, change the situation to something less crazy than an apple dumpling. I've had a couple of them in the past weeks and some of them it took quite a while before I realized--this is a prompting, not just my desires or laziness or whatever! And today I'm experiencing the consequences of one of those missed promptings. Last week I kept wanting to go get a book from the library. It's the next in a series that I'm trying to read slowly. No need to waste two weeks of my life reading book after book. So I've spaced them out, and tried to mostly use my time on other things. But all last week I thought about it. More than once I thought--I almost feel like it's a prompting to do this (in part because it repeated itself). But I know it's really just me wanting to escape reality and no, I don't need to read, I need to do X, Y, & Z. But today, I'm pretty sure it was a prompting, not an important one, but still. Pretty sure that today would be better if I had that book. (Library is closed, of course.) Wish I had listened. Really do.
And that's about all. Longest unimportant blog post, but I'll sure enjoy it in the years to come. :)
Thursday, October 11, 2012
32 coming right up
First, a big thanks to Meg, Lesli and Sara for your ideas. Also to Aline on the ground. (Notes to each of you in the comments on that post. I enjoyed seeing where we'd thought of similar ones and loved the new ones.) This has already been so fun (and good for my soul) that it will most definitely be redone for some other arbitrary deadline. In other words, ideas that haven't been used may be in the future, so keep them coming.
And now, without further ado,
I present
1. Celebrate 1 year with Jiyeon with a pizza making fest
2. Go to another state
3. Go WalMart shopping
4. Party with Irena & Amber
5. See an apostle in person
6.Write essay for ward newsletter
7. Decorate living room
8. Make apple turnovers
9. Eat Brazilian or Turkish food
10. Start family history poster
11. Hold a baby/play with a toddler
12. Make Christmas calendar
13. At least one thing Rachel wants to do (MFA, school, NYC)
14. Harvest the giant carrot
15. Watch "Chariots of Fire"!
16. Make rats
17. Find out about piano lessons
18. Mail BofM
19. Mother's BDay video w/ Aline and Rachel
20. Figure out my life with Rachel
21. Use leaf cookie cutters from ARE
22. Get 100 hugs
23. Get my feet tickled and tickle someone else's feet or give them a massage
24. Blow bubbles over a body of water
25. Thank you to Mother & Father (piano...)
26. Read a stack of children's books
27. Meet someone new
28. Dance
29. Write a letter to Baby Benson
30. Hike or long bike ride
31. Wear my tiara in public
32. Laugh for at least a minute straight
*Actually, it's 32 by the end of my 32nd birthday but that doesn't rhyme with ado, so there you have it.
And now, without further ado,
I present
32 by 32*
1. Celebrate 1 year with Jiyeon with a pizza making fest
2. Go to another state
3. Go WalMart shopping
4. Party with Irena & Amber
5. See an apostle in person
6.Write essay for ward newsletter
7. Decorate living room
8. Make apple turnovers
9. Eat Brazilian or Turkish food
10. Start family history poster
11. Hold a baby/play with a toddler
12. Make Christmas calendar
13. At least one thing Rachel wants to do (MFA, school, NYC)
14. Harvest the giant carrot
15. Watch "Chariots of Fire"!
16. Make rats
17. Find out about piano lessons
18. Mail BofM
19. Mother's BDay video w/ Aline and Rachel
20. Figure out my life with Rachel
21. Use leaf cookie cutters from ARE
22. Get 100 hugs
23. Get my feet tickled and tickle someone else's feet or give them a massage
24. Blow bubbles over a body of water
25. Thank you to Mother & Father (piano...)
26. Read a stack of children's books
27. Meet someone new
28. Dance
29. Write a letter to Baby Benson
30. Hike or long bike ride
31. Wear my tiara in public
32. Laugh for at least a minute straight
*Actually, it's 32 by the end of my 32nd birthday but that doesn't rhyme with ado, so there you have it.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Quick! I need ideas
If anyone reads this before the day is over...
I really felt the need to go to the temple this morning and the stars aligned and I was able to go. It was good to be there. And I left with this idea--I'm not going to say that it was inspired, but I like it and I'm going to do it.
I've been feeling the need to be distracted, in part so that I'm not (figuratively) picking at wounds and so that I'm not all gloom and doom with everyone around me (including Rachel, who will be here in about 30 hours!).
Also, it is my birthday next week. Influenced by a variety of sources (including my own blog and my journal), I've been I was thinking how I'm sad that I don't have more time to do a 32 by 32 or something before my birthday. Because nothing distracts me more and makes me happier than having goals to work toward (and right now they need to not be work or household chore or financial goals). Well, while I was in the temple it came back and I thought--why not? Why can't I do 32 by 32? They just have to be slightly smaller things.
So, by the end of the day (I might be checking off even as I'm adding), I'm going to have a list of 32 things to do by the end of my 32nd birthday (that's gives me the day of when people are playing with me to finish anything up).
Few factors to consider. I'll have 9 days (plus today) to complete them. It's freezing here. Rachel will be in town for most of the time (she's ready!). We'll have a rental car for 3 days (one being Sunday). Saturday and Sunday are fairly booked--though I've kept Saturday morning free. And, well, that's enough factors for now.
I really felt the need to go to the temple this morning and the stars aligned and I was able to go. It was good to be there. And I left with this idea--I'm not going to say that it was inspired, but I like it and I'm going to do it.
I've been feeling the need to be distracted, in part so that I'm not (figuratively) picking at wounds and so that I'm not all gloom and doom with everyone around me (including Rachel, who will be here in about 30 hours!).
Also, it is my birthday next week. Influenced by a variety of sources (including my own blog and my journal), I've been I was thinking how I'm sad that I don't have more time to do a 32 by 32 or something before my birthday. Because nothing distracts me more and makes me happier than having goals to work toward (and right now they need to not be work or household chore or financial goals). Well, while I was in the temple it came back and I thought--why not? Why can't I do 32 by 32? They just have to be slightly smaller things.
So, by the end of the day (I might be checking off even as I'm adding), I'm going to have a list of 32 things to do by the end of my 32nd birthday (that's gives me the day of when people are playing with me to finish anything up).
Any great ideas?
(and send them along even if it's not today--this will be a rather flexible list and 64 things are even better than 32)Few factors to consider. I'll have 9 days (plus today) to complete them. It's freezing here. Rachel will be in town for most of the time (she's ready!). We'll have a rental car for 3 days (one being Sunday). Saturday and Sunday are fairly booked--though I've kept Saturday morning free. And, well, that's enough factors for now.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
The Problem
The problem with applying for something (applying for immigration benefits, jobs, housing, even things like dating) is that it gets your hopes up even when they weren't up before! That italicized part is the kicker.
On the face of the case or the job description, I think "there's no way he/she/I could get that; his/her case/my experience just isn't up to par." Or even, "it's possible, but probably not." (or, dating: this person would probably never be interested)
But then I try. I look at it from every angle. And I make my very bestest case. And in the process I learn to believe. I really believe. I see how he/she/I do meet the requirements and do my best to advocate.
Alas, in the end, other people see it the way I did at first [am I really a terrible advocate or is it just that the situation was actually hopeless?]. And my hopes are crushed. Unfortunately, in the case of a case, other people's hopes get crushed too.
Sometimes it seems like it would be better to just never try. Sure, I never succeed that way, but I also don't get my hopes up. Bleh. *
On a completely different note: my bishop's wife invited me to come finish picking the apple trees in their backyard and I came home with lots of buckets of apples. Including some mighty fine, home-grown, Golden Delicious apples. I'm eating one right now. And it is SOOOO good. Mmmmm. (If you come over I'll share.)
* If you think this is a downer post, be grateful I didn't post yesterday when I spent the day angry, bitter, and sobbing my heart out. The truth is, today is a building hopes day. I'm just trying (unsuccessfully) to remind myself how it will really turn out. :)
On the face of the case or the job description, I think "there's no way he/she/I could get that; his/her case/my experience just isn't up to par." Or even, "it's possible, but probably not." (or, dating: this person would probably never be interested)
But then I try. I look at it from every angle. And I make my very bestest case. And in the process I learn to believe. I really believe. I see how he/she/I do meet the requirements and do my best to advocate.
And I get my stinkin' hopes up!!
(I can't seem to help it, even when I try so hard not to.)
Alas, in the end, other people see it the way I did at first [am I really a terrible advocate or is it just that the situation was actually hopeless?]. And my hopes are crushed. Unfortunately, in the case of a case, other people's hopes get crushed too.
Sometimes it seems like it would be better to just never try. Sure, I never succeed that way, but I also don't get my hopes up. Bleh. *
On a completely different note: my bishop's wife invited me to come finish picking the apple trees in their backyard and I came home with lots of buckets of apples. Including some mighty fine, home-grown, Golden Delicious apples. I'm eating one right now. And it is SOOOO good. Mmmmm. (If you come over I'll share.)
* If you think this is a downer post, be grateful I didn't post yesterday when I spent the day angry, bitter, and sobbing my heart out. The truth is, today is a building hopes day. I'm just trying (unsuccessfully) to remind myself how it will really turn out. :)
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Because
It's been a truly lovely Sabbath day. Absolutely nothing phenomenal, just peaceful. With peace that fills my soul to the depths.
Gorgeous weather--cool, super sunny, dry, beautiful. September at its best.
I'm in the midst of receiving special revelation (much from a long day at the temple yesterday) that's been building for awhile and coming together. (nothing dramatic that you'll see in some great decision, just good line-upon-line revelation for my life)
I followed promptings and served. I learned in church. I attend a beautiful fireside about building the kingdom of God in the New England/Boston area.
I've had some wonderful conversations. (during which I was able to recognize and solidify some of the teachings and instructions from the Lord)
I fed my roommates a yummy dinner.
I don't know what else, just, like I said, a lot of peace.
Not a fired out, hyper, excited good day like sometimes. Just a solid, lovely day. A day of rest. A day of the Lord.
Because of all that, I don't want to go to bed. I know I'm going to be sorry in the morning (I don't do well without enough sleep). But I don't want it to end. So I'm sitting here just trying to prolong it. Like a child, I suppose. And not like Ruth, at all.
Just because.
Gorgeous weather--cool, super sunny, dry, beautiful. September at its best.
I'm in the midst of receiving special revelation (much from a long day at the temple yesterday) that's been building for awhile and coming together. (nothing dramatic that you'll see in some great decision, just good line-upon-line revelation for my life)
I followed promptings and served. I learned in church. I attend a beautiful fireside about building the kingdom of God in the New England/Boston area.
I've had some wonderful conversations. (during which I was able to recognize and solidify some of the teachings and instructions from the Lord)
I fed my roommates a yummy dinner.
I don't know what else, just, like I said, a lot of peace.
Not a fired out, hyper, excited good day like sometimes. Just a solid, lovely day. A day of rest. A day of the Lord.
Because of all that, I don't want to go to bed. I know I'm going to be sorry in the morning (I don't do well without enough sleep). But I don't want it to end. So I'm sitting here just trying to prolong it. Like a child, I suppose. And not like Ruth, at all.
Just because.
Friday, September 14, 2012
Reflections on passport photos
This week I got a passport picture so I can renew my passport.* My old passport expired 2.5 years ago, so it's 12.5 years old. I took that picture in February or March 2000, toward the end of freshman year of BYU. As I looked at the two pictures, here are some random thoughts I had. Of no real importance, but I just wanted to say them to someone:
- Some day I need to take a passport picture when I have not just walked a mile+ in the heat (I actually remember being hot and sweaty on the day I took it in 2000 and I was yesterday too--it does make my cheeks pink!)
- I kind-of look like a boy now. I mean, I already knew that, but in a passport picture it's even more pronounced.
- My face is a lot thinner now than it was 12.5 years ago.
- There actually was a time in my life when I did not have super dark circles under my eyes. It's certainly not now (they're kind-of scary in the foto). I don't think it was in high school. I also don't think it was any time during or post-mission. But there was a time. And I used to have proof--before they made me return my 2000 passport.
- I remember that there was a time... well, make that, there were times. Or there was a long period of time. ...in my life when I cared a lot more about my physical appearance. I don't care now the way I did then. Some of it might have to do with just getting older, but I think more of it has to do with the difficulty of the past few years. I am forever changed. So even when I see myself that looks kind of like a boy and has really dark circles (these things I really only noticed when I held the pictures beside each other and tried to find specific things that made me look older), what I see is something I just didn't have eyes to see a decade ago. I see my smile that's real and shines through even in my "neutral" pose. I see patience and love. I see the face of a woman who cries very often (fortunately not that day!). I see a daughter of God who has a heart softer than I think it's ever been. And I'm grateful for the reflection.
* This is long over-due, but seemed unnecessary in an era when I couldn't afford to travel to the next state over (even in New England!), much less to another country. However, with my parents in another country for 2 years and the Egypt "crisis" (personal crisis--but I never did write about that, did I? One day.), it is past time. And my sister says so too, so she's getting me a new one.
p.s. 100% unrelated, but on my mind this instant and I don't know if I'll ever blog about it again. My office (where I am now, having a lunch break) is in the same building as an American Muslim Center. They have prayers every day, but Friday is their holy day and it becomes a bit of a mad house. But also, because so many people are coming, their door is open a lot more often. I LOVE hearing the call to prayer. LOVE it. I also enjoy the prayers themselves. And I even enjoy hearing the preaching (what is currently spilling out). But any time, and especially late at night, I love hearing the call the prayer. happy.
- Some day I need to take a passport picture when I have not just walked a mile+ in the heat (I actually remember being hot and sweaty on the day I took it in 2000 and I was yesterday too--it does make my cheeks pink!)
- I kind-of look like a boy now. I mean, I already knew that, but in a passport picture it's even more pronounced.
- My face is a lot thinner now than it was 12.5 years ago.
- There actually was a time in my life when I did not have super dark circles under my eyes. It's certainly not now (they're kind-of scary in the foto). I don't think it was in high school. I also don't think it was any time during or post-mission. But there was a time. And I used to have proof--before they made me return my 2000 passport.
- I remember that there was a time... well, make that, there were times. Or there was a long period of time. ...in my life when I cared a lot more about my physical appearance. I don't care now the way I did then. Some of it might have to do with just getting older, but I think more of it has to do with the difficulty of the past few years. I am forever changed. So even when I see myself that looks kind of like a boy and has really dark circles (these things I really only noticed when I held the pictures beside each other and tried to find specific things that made me look older), what I see is something I just didn't have eyes to see a decade ago. I see my smile that's real and shines through even in my "neutral" pose. I see patience and love. I see the face of a woman who cries very often (fortunately not that day!). I see a daughter of God who has a heart softer than I think it's ever been. And I'm grateful for the reflection.
* This is long over-due, but seemed unnecessary in an era when I couldn't afford to travel to the next state over (even in New England!), much less to another country. However, with my parents in another country for 2 years and the Egypt "crisis" (personal crisis--but I never did write about that, did I? One day.), it is past time. And my sister says so too, so she's getting me a new one.
p.s. 100% unrelated, but on my mind this instant and I don't know if I'll ever blog about it again. My office (where I am now, having a lunch break) is in the same building as an American Muslim Center. They have prayers every day, but Friday is their holy day and it becomes a bit of a mad house. But also, because so many people are coming, their door is open a lot more often. I LOVE hearing the call to prayer. LOVE it. I also enjoy the prayers themselves. And I even enjoy hearing the preaching (what is currently spilling out). But any time, and especially late at night, I love hearing the call the prayer. happy.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
August
It's August 29. I can't let the month go with a post. Unfortunately, it won't be much of a post. But it will exist on the August 2012 archive.
It's been an eventful couple of months. I've taken plenty of pictures. I've thought lots of thoughts. But who has time to blog? Especially now that my blogging-conducive computer is at my office.
I'm busy because:
I went to a couple of wedding celebrations in Utah.
I went to an awesome family reunion in Idaho.
I was sick/finishing final grades for my Research Methods class for a week.
I've been running a new business. I have actual clients!
I've spent almost every spare moment in my garden or using/preserving the food from my garden.
Most of the time I'm worn out. But life is actually pretty good right now.
How can it not be when it's full of tomato sandwiches?
It's been an eventful couple of months. I've taken plenty of pictures. I've thought lots of thoughts. But who has time to blog? Especially now that my blogging-conducive computer is at my office.
I'm busy because:
I went to a couple of wedding celebrations in Utah.
I went to an awesome family reunion in Idaho.
I was sick/finishing final grades for my Research Methods class for a week.
I've been running a new business. I have actual clients!
I've spent almost every spare moment in my garden or using/preserving the food from my garden.
Most of the time I'm worn out. But life is actually pretty good right now.
How can it not be when it's full of tomato sandwiches?
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
My summer summed up in a photo
I bike everywhere I go these days. (Almost everywhere. Actually, everywhere. The "almost" is for time. Everywhere, almost all the time.) It's a big part of this summer. It's been wonderful to gain confidence in city biking and the independence that has come with my own mode of transportation.
And my garden. I love it. And it consumes large amounts of my life. And everyone who knows me here has heard a ridiculous amount about it. I love it!
The helmet was fuller when I left the garden and was a cuter cornucopia, but I saw lots of nice people to share with. And I suppose that's some of the summing too.
(Both of these aspects of my life would appreciate a break in the hot weather. But I can't quite wish for cool weather in this area. There'll be plenty of that.)
Take me out...
Yesterday afternoon friend Amy texted to see if I wanted to help her use some free Red Sox tickets she'd just gotten. Yes. Amy works for a big deal health insurance company and these were their smoozing tickets. Our seats were beautiful! Right over first base.
I actually really enjoyed the game (even though I did NOT enjoy getting home). As I realized how much I was enjoying a baseball game, I wondered why and came up with two conclusions. One was our great view that made it more fun. But equally important--actually, I believe more important--I've learned to be more patient with life. So a slower kind of game doesn't bother me like it would have. And that's my self-reflection of the day.
Me and Katherine enjoying the game and our lovely seats:
Katherine is my summer roommate and she is fabulous. I feel very blessed that she's here this summer!!
I actually really enjoyed the game (even though I did NOT enjoy getting home). As I realized how much I was enjoying a baseball game, I wondered why and came up with two conclusions. One was our great view that made it more fun. But equally important--actually, I believe more important--I've learned to be more patient with life. So a slower kind of game doesn't bother me like it would have. And that's my self-reflection of the day.
Me and Katherine enjoying the game and our lovely seats:
Thursday, July 12, 2012
My creative contributions
So, how did my parts of the wedding turn out? Why, thank you for asking.
I'll tell you about it. (In some detail, since this is my blog.)
First, let me say that I do not think of myself as creative. I follow directions, but I'm not much on creating--at least not physical objects. Definitely not an artist. I think that's why I get so thrill when things I make turn out beautifully. And I get even more excited when I did something besides follow directions in order to get the end product. So this wedding involved several beautiful things that I made. It made me pretty excited! [And before we move on, let's give credit where credit is due. Many prayers were answered in guidance from the Holy Ghost.]
Dresses
Nancy's instructions for all wedding creations, clothes, etc. were "bright summer colors". That's about it. So, you can judge for yourself if they match her criteria.
Since I have no good summer dresses and Rachel has only old ones, I decided to create some for the day. Like a fairy god mother.
My involved fabric that was a color I love. I'd spent hours looking at premade dresses, patterns and fabric and finally just decided to just forget it all, buy the plain cotton fabric that was a lovely color and make a simple dress.
Color: I love.
Simple dress: Ha. I used a pattern that was my aunt's back in the 70s. It was not a good choice (I do not a body for the 70s). I spent 3 or 4 times as long as I should have on this dress (including much taking out and trying again and taking out and trying again) and it still doesn't really fit me comfortably. However, I was excited because I did a lot of altering and making up and all of that worked great. :) Hooray! No modeling pictures of it, but here's something:
Then came Rachel's. Much better! First, I found this lovely fabric and decided I didn't care if we didn't match in any way, shape or form, this was also "bright summer" and I liked it. Then, I re-perused patterns and again, came away with nothing. Only to return to the internet a few days later and a new pattern had appeared! It was expensive (new = not on sale), but ebay helped me out and got it to me on time. I love the pattern; I've been imagining it (more or less) for quite some time. It's a 60's-inspired pattern and, let's be honest, I do have a 60's body (funny (when I'm in the mood), Rachel's body does wonders for my dress and hers was designed for curves like mine). And then I cut it out and sewed it up in no time flat. Easy, peasy. Even the parts that included techniques I'd never done before. Including the alterations to (HOPEFULLY!!) fit Rachel's longer than average body (again, I was proud of myself for figuring out the alterations; nervous, though, because she was across the country and the moment of truth wouldn't come until 24 hours before the wedding (and I had other things to do in those 24 hours).
Before I took the dress to Rachel, I wore it to church. I just loved it and wanted to wear it once. It was too long for me and because of the fitted bodice style, it was obvious (to me, at least) but I still enjoyed it. (Don't worry, when I have time to sew again, I'll be whipping one up for myself.)
Then, "Christmas morning" came and it fit! Hooray. Again, did we take pictures during the hectic-ness of reception? No, we didn't. But here are a couple of the dress and Rachel in action:
We'll get some modeling pictures when we're together again in July. Hopefully. (And I'll sweat off 10 pounds by then so mine will fit better. :) )
Next up: Flowers!!
Nancy asked me to do her flowers. Of course, I said sure and when she was here in March we looked at some different things to get a feel for what she like. There were a few more guidelines than "bright summer colors", but not much.
What I realized with time (besides the fact that no guidelines is a curse as well as a blessing) is that my years as a florist's apprentice are steadily receding into the distant past. Although I still know more than the average folk, there's a lot I've forgotten (as evidenced by my forgetting some simple corsage construction). Also, it's a little nervewracking to not be able to do anything for the flowers until 30 hours before the wedding, in a town that I know NOTHING about. Again, answered prayers. Hyrum helped me search for flowers the day before, I plunked them into a bucket for a day/night and early the morning of the wedding I got up (me and the smoke from the forest fires. Oh, and poor Rachel who had been up since 3 working on mounds of work that was due the Monday after this Friday wedding.) and went to work. At my mother's suggestion, I also snagged some of the Wall's flowers to add it--great addition!, should have used more (the yellow/orangeish lilies)
I love bright colors! I love flowers! And I love creating things with flowers! (even though I wish I knew more. someday - a design class is still on my list)
All day long I felt happy as I saw the flowers (not always the case when viewing the objects of my creation attempts):
(Disclaimer: I think the flowers were pretter than any of my pictures portray.)
One Miss Lietta most definitely approved!!
The mothers'/grandmothers' corsages also turned out beautifully. And in the top dress pictures you can see my special for Nancy bouquet--not bright summer colors, but green Bells of Ireland. (Fancy Nancy loves green and these are such a FUN green flower! (if you don't know them, go to a flower shop and ask to look at some)).
All in all, I was quite pleased. Perhaps most importantly, I did not allow any of this ruin the day for me. I did what I needed to and then I enjoyed the reasons I was there. :)
First, let me say that I do not think of myself as creative. I follow directions, but I'm not much on creating--at least not physical objects. Definitely not an artist. I think that's why I get so thrill when things I make turn out beautifully. And I get even more excited when I did something besides follow directions in order to get the end product. So this wedding involved several beautiful things that I made. It made me pretty excited! [And before we move on, let's give credit where credit is due. Many prayers were answered in guidance from the Holy Ghost.]
Dresses
Nancy's instructions for all wedding creations, clothes, etc. were "bright summer colors". That's about it. So, you can judge for yourself if they match her criteria.
Since I have no good summer dresses and Rachel has only old ones, I decided to create some for the day. Like a fairy god mother.
My involved fabric that was a color I love. I'd spent hours looking at premade dresses, patterns and fabric and finally just decided to just forget it all, buy the plain cotton fabric that was a lovely color and make a simple dress.
Color: I love.
Simple dress: Ha. I used a pattern that was my aunt's back in the 70s. It was not a good choice (I do not a body for the 70s). I spent 3 or 4 times as long as I should have on this dress (including much taking out and trying again and taking out and trying again) and it still doesn't really fit me comfortably. However, I was excited because I did a lot of altering and making up and all of that worked great. :) Hooray! No modeling pictures of it, but here's something:
Then came Rachel's. Much better! First, I found this lovely fabric and decided I didn't care if we didn't match in any way, shape or form, this was also "bright summer" and I liked it. Then, I re-perused patterns and again, came away with nothing. Only to return to the internet a few days later and a new pattern had appeared! It was expensive (new = not on sale), but ebay helped me out and got it to me on time. I love the pattern; I've been imagining it (more or less) for quite some time. It's a 60's-inspired pattern and, let's be honest, I do have a 60's body (funny (when I'm in the mood), Rachel's body does wonders for my dress and hers was designed for curves like mine). And then I cut it out and sewed it up in no time flat. Easy, peasy. Even the parts that included techniques I'd never done before. Including the alterations to (HOPEFULLY!!) fit Rachel's longer than average body (again, I was proud of myself for figuring out the alterations; nervous, though, because she was across the country and the moment of truth wouldn't come until 24 hours before the wedding (and I had other things to do in those 24 hours).
Then, "Christmas morning" came and it fit! Hooray. Again, did we take pictures during the hectic-ness of reception? No, we didn't. But here are a couple of the dress and Rachel in action:
We'll get some modeling pictures when we're together again in July. Hopefully. (And I'll sweat off 10 pounds by then so mine will fit better. :) )
Next up: Flowers!!
Nancy asked me to do her flowers. Of course, I said sure and when she was here in March we looked at some different things to get a feel for what she like. There were a few more guidelines than "bright summer colors", but not much.
What I realized with time (besides the fact that no guidelines is a curse as well as a blessing) is that my years as a florist's apprentice are steadily receding into the distant past. Although I still know more than the average folk, there's a lot I've forgotten (as evidenced by my forgetting some simple corsage construction). Also, it's a little nervewracking to not be able to do anything for the flowers until 30 hours before the wedding, in a town that I know NOTHING about. Again, answered prayers. Hyrum helped me search for flowers the day before, I plunked them into a bucket for a day/night and early the morning of the wedding I got up (me and the smoke from the forest fires. Oh, and poor Rachel who had been up since 3 working on mounds of work that was due the Monday after this Friday wedding.) and went to work. At my mother's suggestion, I also snagged some of the Wall's flowers to add it--great addition!, should have used more (the yellow/orangeish lilies)
I love bright colors! I love flowers! And I love creating things with flowers! (even though I wish I knew more. someday - a design class is still on my list)
All day long I felt happy as I saw the flowers (not always the case when viewing the objects of my creation attempts):
(Disclaimer: I think the flowers were pretter than any of my pictures portray.)
One Miss Lietta most definitely approved!!
The mothers'/grandmothers' corsages also turned out beautifully. And in the top dress pictures you can see my special for Nancy bouquet--not bright summer colors, but green Bells of Ireland. (Fancy Nancy loves green and these are such a FUN green flower! (if you don't know them, go to a flower shop and ask to look at some)).
All in all, I was quite pleased. Perhaps most importantly, I did not allow any of this ruin the day for me. I did what I needed to and then I enjoyed the reasons I was there. :)
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