My Mom just flew back to Chicago after spending a long weekend with me in NYC. Although I've lived here for nearly 3 years, this was her visit to see me. I realize she's been bogged down for the past 4 years as my Dad's care giver, but I was on the verge of feeling resentful. This weekend was the best gift she could possibly give me, and also give herself, since she too needed a vacation after all this time.

She arrived Thursday afternoon and spent the night at my apartment in Brooklyn. On Friday, she came to work with me, so I could show her around the museum and take her out for lunch, but then she came back and ended up exploring more exhibits until around 3:00pm. I met her at our hotel in Midtown after work, where we grabbed some Spanish tapas for dinner and then saw "American Idiot" on Broadway.

Saturday was pretty much a marathon of activity. We started the day at MoMA, then the American Folk Art Museum, and then headed down to Chinatown for a bit before hitting Union Square and finally going back up to Times Square.

My Mom left this morning after breakfast, so it was a short trip but definitely packed and enjoyable. I don't know if she'll be able to visit me in NYC again, but I'm so happy she was able to come when she did, so I could at least share with her a little piece of my life at this moment.

On my way to work this morning, I passed a sexy zombie stumbling out of a nightclub after a long night (and morning) of Halloween partying. In my humble opinion, the words "sexy" and "zombie" should never be used in the same sentence. I remember when Halloween costumes were supposed to look frightening, or at least disguise the person wearing it. Halloween (or Samhain for us Pagans), after all, is the time we honor those who have passed on, and welcome the coming winter as the summer has come to an end. It is believed that the tradition of dressing up for this holiday was to appease the evil spirits or impersonate the dead.

Sometime over the past few decades, the objective shifted. The goal is now for women to show as much cleavage and skin as possible. The shorter the skirt, the better. I don't necessarily understand how this became such a popular theme over the decades. I could say that the skank factor (yes, I made up a new term) that has become Halloween is the result of hook-up culture, but that would be inaccurate. As a young feminist, I should be thrilled that women feel comfortable enough with their bodies to display them for public viewing. I should be thrilled with women's sexual freedom and awareness. Overall, I am thrilled. However, I feel it's also possible to take anything to the extreme. Halloween traditions aside, I don't really think it's beneficial for women to prance down the street disguised as a sexy zombie, sexy nurse, sexy rainbow brite, or anything else with the word "sexy" tagged onto it. I would probably feel differently about all of this if sexual objectification and victim blaming wasn't so embedded in this society. Whenever I read about a woman who had been raped, there tends to be commentary regarding her style of dress. In a perfect world, or at least a more evolved one, women's clothing should never factor into a crime. Until then, I think the sexy costumes should be saved for the bedroom.

When I started this blog, my goal was to post something at least four times a week. That hasn't happened. I've barely blogged at all this summer, but let's face it, it's been a pretty rough summer for me. I won't go into it, although I'll mention that more responsibilities have been thrown on my back than I ever thought was possible at this chapter in my life. I'm emotionally exhausted from the weight of it all . . .

. . . which brings me to today's post. Last week was complete and total bliss. I packed my bags and headed out to the cornfields of Illinois for a week long intensive course in the care and preservation of textiles. Not only was this a wonderful learning experience filled with professional networking opportunities, but it was also a time to temporarily separate myself from the outside world. No internet, no television, no newspapers, and very limited phone usage for a 5 day period. All I did was focus on my class, socialize with my peers, and soak in the fresh country air. By the time I had to head back to NYC, I felt completely energized and mentally cleansed, ready to take on the world.

Now I'm back in NYC working and breathing smog, but I'm feeling a little more optimistic than I did before I left for the Midwest. I only wish I had more opportunities to spend time away from the clutter of life at the bottom of the urban canyon.

Facebook is an interesting thing, that I'm just beginning to learn about since I only created an account about six months ago. I'm the type of person who would much rather have meaningful face-to-face conversations with true friends than chat with people online who I barely recognize from my past or who I consider mere acquaintances of convenience. But that's just me, my personality.

I recently received a message via Facebook from one of my closest friends from high school. She had copied several others as well and is hoping to arrange somewhat of a reunion for next summer. She said she'd like to go on a canoe trip down the Wisconsin River just like we used to every summer from 1989 to 1998. I immediately began to reminisce over the past - recalling old memories, laughing to myself. Life was much simpler then.

It took me a few days to respond to my friend's initial message, but I found some of the other responses a bit humorous. The first to respond were the friends who are still living in Chicago, married and have children. They were quick to mention specific dates in which they would be available. They're ready to leave the city, to get out and be free for a short bit of time. The friends who responded later on were those like myself, having moved far from home and still flailing about the world, trying to grasp which direction to take next. They're ready to return home, but making plans a year in advance seems daunting and unrealistic. Who knows where we'll be tomorrow, let alone 12 months from now?

What I gather from these message threads is that the friends who are more settled in life are yearning for an escape from the mundane, but the friends who seem to be winging it through life are more interested in rekindling old friendships for a brief moment and then moving onto the next opportunity. It'll be interesting to see what follows in the next several months, if we can actually pull all of ourselves together to reconnect and enjoy ourselves, this time as adults instead of teenagers. Maybe it'll be an awkward experience, but maybe it'll also be rewarding and bring new memories for all of us to share.

I realize the How To Be Alone video has been going around the internet for a while now, but I just wanted to throw out some comments at this time. While this is a lovely poem that encourages people to embrace moments of solitude and understand that "alone is okay," I believe I've accomplished this task rather well over the past few years. What I actually need to work on is being comfortable with other people - taking the risk to meet new people. I understand myself and I'm happy with who I am, but I need to take the next step and invite others into my life. I feel that sometimes it's possible to become too comfortable inside one's little bubble of solitude that we forget there's an entire world out there to explore with others. I realize a lot of people will disagree with me, but I feel our reliance on and addiction to the internet doesn't help us connect with people on a personal level. It's much easier for us to chat with friends online than to actually put effort into meeting up with friends in person. Instead of focusing on our personal needs, we tend to distract ourselves with the overwhelming amount of information on the internet. I admit I'm guilty of this too - I've wasted hours of the evenings staring at my computer screen or chatting with friends online who only live blocks away. So, in some sense, we know how to be alone, but we don't know how to do so without distracting ourselves.