Whew!

Bag of Hershey's Kisses $2.50

Tube of Disinfecting Wipes $1.75

Package of Undies with a Car Theme $4.50



Only having one in diapers...priceless!!

G2

Last night as I was putting my son down for the night, I felt something hard and definitely out of place under the foam egg crate on his bed.

Upon further investigation I discovered that G2 had secreted three truffle style wrapped chocolates there.

Over his protestations I removed the chocolates and put on my best "stern" mommy face to let him know that hiding chocolates (that aren't his to begin with) in his bed was not acceptable.

But, as I was walking down the hall I could only think one thing...

"Ah...that's my boy!"

Funny, funny Mother

The older I get, the funnier (in the ironic sense of the word) this short story becomes.

So, to all the mothers out there who are just now recovering from Christmas...


SEE MOTHER... FUNNY FUNNY MOTHER


See Mother, see mother laugh.
Mother is happy.
Mother is happy about Christmas.
Mother has many plans.
Mother has many plans for Christmas.
Mother is organized. Mother smiles all the time.
Funny, funny mother.

See Mother.
See mother smile.
Mother is happy.
The shopping is done.
See the children watch TV.
Watch children, watch.
See the children change their minds.
See them ask Santa for different toys.
Look. Look. Mother is not smiling.
Funny, funny mother.

See mother.
See mother sew.
Mother will make dresses.
Mother will make robes.
Mother will make shirts.
See mother put the zipper in wrong.
See mother sew the dress on the wrong side.
See mother cut the skirt to short.
See mother put the material away until January.
Look. Look, see mother take a tranqualizer.
Funny, funny mother.

See mother.
See mother buy raisins and nuts.
See mother buy candied pineapple and powdered sugar.
See mother buy flour, and dates, and pecans, and brown sugar, and
Bananas, and spices and vanilla.
Look. Look. Mother is mixing everything together.
See the children press out cookies
See the flour on their elbows.
See the cookies burn.
See the cakes fall.
See the children pull taffy.
See mother pull her hair.
See mother clean the kitchen with the garden hose.
Funny, funny mother.

See mother.
See mother wrap presents.
See mother look for the end on the tape roll.
See mother bite her finger nails.
See mother go.
See mother go to the store 12 times in one hour.
Go mother go.
See mother go faster. Run mother run.
See mother trim the tree.
See mother have a party.
See mother make popcorn.
See mother wash the walls.
See mother scrub the rug.
See mother tear up her organized plan.
See mother forget a gift for Uncle Harry.
See mother get hives.
See the far away look in mother's eyes.
Mother has become disorganized.
Mother has become dis-oriented.
Funny, funny mother.

It is finally Christmas morning.
See the happy family.
See father smile. Father is happy. Smile father smile.
Father loves the fruit cake. Father loves the Christmas pudding.
Father loves all his new neckties.
Look. Look. See the happy children. See the children's toys.
Santa was very good to the children. The children will remember this
Christmas.

See mother.
Mother is slumped in a chair.
Mother is crying uncontrollably.
Mother does not look well.
Mother has ugly dark circles under her blood shot eyes.

Everyone helps mother to her bed.
See mother sleep quietly under her heavy medication.
See mother smile.
Funny, funny mother.