Independence Is A Good Thing....Right?

She just walked away and never looked back. Sometimes now she even forgets to tell me bye. The first day we walk into school and I'm the one who starts crying....just a little. I was not prepared for this. I thought the day Kate went to school I would feel some relief at having the opportunity to get more things that are "necessary" done. Not so. I miss her so much. I feel like those four hours a day she disappears into some black hole and I have no idea what she is doing. She comes home and I try to give her the old Q & A but lets face it four-year-olds have way too much imagination to give you a simple, straight answer at what they did at school today. Now I have taken to pulling every paper out of her back pack and having her tell me one-by-one what they are and what she was doing when she made them. Am I OCD? DO I have a problem letting go or is this normal mom craziness? My friend tried to warn me about this but I didn't understand....until now. On the up side though...

She is happy! I can tell because she comes home super wired and excited about everything and then crashes-tears and all-around 4:00. I know she likes it and so I have to remind myself when I daydream about taking her out of school and selfishly making her stay home with me that this is good for her. She is growing and learning and doing all the wonderful things that she really needs to be doing right now. Then she comes home and her and I usually hatch up some sort of project to do together. This week we baked cake bites. Cooking is her favorite thing to do only third to looking through cookbooks for things to make (which completely reminds me of my sister Melynda) and, of course, watching Dora the Explorer.

(I have yet to get a picture of them both looking at me)

I might add that I am not the only one struggling with this possessiveness over Kate. Every time we take Kate into school Carter stands by the door that she walks into...and never looks back might I add...and sticks out his bottom lip and whispers "Kate" as he reaches out to her. Sometimes I am tempted to use this excuse to make her come and get back in the car with me but I remind myself and Carter that we will be coming to pick her up in four short...long...hours.

(Yup! I really do drop her off looking like this. This is Carter's handy work by-the-way he was pretty proud.)

The only upside to all of this school business is I get a lot more face time and play time with this>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

So at least there is a positive side to all this. Especially considering that this boy is in need of some boy play time. Chris and I realized this when the other day he came in wanting to play dress ups and brought us Kate's Cinderella dress which we kindly put on him because we don't care but we thought maybe it is time to invest in some different dress-ups for his sake. Lets face it someday he is going to care that he dressed up in his big sisters dress-ups and wore her princess high heels around the house.

This sweet thing gets more love and time with me than anyone so she isn't suffering. Lucky me! She is a good sport...usually....when I have to yank her out of bed at 7:30 am especially since she would like to be sleeping till 9:00.

It always heals my heart everyday that after she walks into class without of flinch or a sign of missing me that when I come to pick her up she always runs out the door with a great big smile and gives me a great big hug. In my mind it is her way of telling me that she wishes she could have been with me all along. :)

Bigger Than I'd Like

I don't usually do Birthday post but this one has be a little excited a little dazed and confused. I can't believe by baby girl is turning 4. I feel like she is really crossing over into big girl land she isn't that round little baby girl I've hauled around all these years. All though she still does have those sweet round cheeks I love. I will admit she is much more interesting now than ever before so I will share some of who she is now.

Newborn

One year

Two

Three

Four

Some of our birthday high lights are
1) Last night we went and took her birthday money that she received from her grandmas and let her pick out a toy. She picked out two princess dolls. Then when we got home she proceeded to ask me to wrap her dolls up so she could open them in the morning. I only did it because she asked and then put them on the table with her other present. Best part was in the morning when she opened her dolls up she acted so surprised that she had gotten them at all. There was lots of "oh my gosh" and jumping up and down involved. It was pretty funny.
2) After she opened her presents she was looking at them and playing with them and she stopped and said to me "mom thank you so much for getting me these presents". No prompting or anything. THAT is the best birthday gift I could ever be given.
3)When she told me she would rather have a babysitter tonight than have me stay home and watch a movie with her. Luckily I took her up on that offer and I got to go to the wonderful Relief Society Broadcast! (This was only a high light for me because it made me laugh. She is getting to the age ALREADY where other people are more interesting than MOM! No hard feelings though)
4)She graciously shared her new dollies with Carter
5)She came home with a back pack full of candy from the parade we went to this morning that we are now all stocked up for our soon to be coming trick-or-treaters.
6)She got to get her first happy meal today at McDonald's and I think I was more excited about it than she was. It reminded me of how excited I would get when I was little and they would hand you your very own box with all that sweet goodness inside that I now can't stand. Apparently neither can they because both of them hardly ate any of their food.
7)Tonight before bed I got to watch her snuggle with her baby sister right after she had finished snuggling with me. Then I tucked her in bed for the first time as my new little four-year-old.

Happy Birthday Kate!