hydrangea | Recent Entries

First: thank you for writing for me! Whatever you write I will be happy to receive it! That said, here's some info on my requests!

Ghost Hunt: Mai Taniyama

Request in short: Mai Taniyama is one of my favourite characters ever and I would love a fic that centers around her. It could be a case fic, something that explores her powers and/or her relationship with the rest of the cast, or, a shippy fic about her and Naru/Dream!Naru. I’m familiar with both anime and light novels, feel free to draw from both!

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): I love the way that Mai slowly grows through the canon, both as a person and in powers. I love how she slowly becomes a part of the agency, how she makes friends and finds a place for herself. She’s just one of those characters that keeps me invested in her and her life and I would love anything focused on her.

What do you like about the canon: I love the mix of supernatural and science, how they are open for each option for every case. I love how it can be deeply creepy but is also full of friendship and love. It’s interesting how they mix various religious practices and don't stick to one thing that works. I also love the slow build as we learn what is actually going on behind the scenes, like Naru’s search for his brother and the fact that Mai for all her upbeat personality is actually very alone.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: My first love is case fic, will always be, but I also love fics centered around Mai’s powers and what they actually are, that tells more about her background. I also ship her with Naru (and dream!Naru). A fic set after the series/light novels would also be lovely, or a straight future fic for that matter!

Anything else? This is just the fandom of my heart. Everything about it makes me happy so I don’t think you can go wrong!

Nikki Galena series - Joy Ellis (Nikki Galena, Joseph Easter)

Request in short: The Nikki Galena books are one of my comfort reads and I find the character of Nikki very fascinating. I love her relationship with Joseph and would love to read about the beginning of their relationship. The cases are usually fun too and I like the extended cast. Crossovers with the author’s other series would also be fine! And, in all honestly, with Nikki’s hatred of flimflam, I think a crossover with a magical fandom or just a supernatural story would be interesting.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): When I began the series I thought that I would hate Nikki, but she grew on me awfully fast. She has a dark side to herself but generally chooses to be a good person. And for all that she seems fairly conservative in her beliefs, she’s good at accepting other people’s beliefs once she’s had a good think about it. She’s just very real, with both bad and good sides.

What do you like about the canon: I’m just a procedural junkie to be honest. I love twisty cases and interesting people and this series gives me both. The setting is a draw as well, as well the broad cast of characters.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: I would love a story about Joseph and Nikki’s first time. I would also love a story where Nikki faces the supernatural (personally, I think that a crossover with Rivers of London would be hilarious). Case fics are always a fave but I would also love something that follows up on old cases. My fave books are probably Stalker on the Fens, Buried on the Fens, Darkness on the Fens and Fear on the Fens.

Anything else? I will be reading the newest book on release, so feel free to use it!

Silent Witness (Nikki, Jack)

Request in short: I’ve just started watching Silent Witness but I’ve already grown fond of Nikki and Jack and the rest of the characters. I would love a case fic as much as a romantic fic featuring these two. I would prefer it if it's set after series 24 with the exception of post-Mexico fic.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): I just find the two very sweet together and I do enjoy watching them solve cases together. I also love the rest of the cast, especially Clarissa and Cara, so feel free to use them!

What do you like about the canon: I’m a procedural junkie. I just love following cases, meeting interesting characters and learning about the extended cast in bits and pieces.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: Too new to the fandom to know! But I would love some case fic, some romance between Jack and Nikki, perhaps some episode tags… Post-Mexico fic where they get together earlier would be interesting, as would something centered around Jack and Northern Ireland.

Anything else? The fandom has a lot of promise, so I’m curious to see where people take it!

Tales of Berseria (Magilou, Velvet)

Request in short: Berseria is such a fun game! It’s fairly dark, Velvet is a fascinating character and I just love the twists and turns it takes. Magilou is one of my favourite characters along with Velvet and I do ship them together. I would love something shippy, alternate endings or a piece delving into Magilou’s character. Please note that I’m not a fan of the Zestiria anime so please leave that canon out.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing, Zestiria anime.

What do you like about the character(s): I enjoy their mix of darkness and light, their complicated pasts and how they still strive towards a future. I love Magilou’s complicated character and how there’s so much that we don’t actually know about her. I love how Velvet is very very clear about what she wants and is going for. They’re just fascinating!

What do you like about the canon: The worldbuilding is rather fascinating and I love Velvet’s straightforward quest forwards that she doesn’t stray from. I love the darkness of it, even though I wish that some people got happier endings (Eizen… And Velvet.). It feels like a proper story where not everything goes as you might have wished it to and people get to be complicated. That said, I wouldn’t protest a happier ending.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: I haven’t read that much to be honest, but I do like Magilou/Velvet fic, as well as Magilou-centered fic. I would like to explore both her past and her character.

Anything else? I’m not married to the idea of Zestiria being canon. Should you feel like it, feel free to discard it.

Ghost Hunt: Mai Taniyama

Request in short: Mai Taniyama is one of my favourite characters ever and I would love a fic that centers around her. It could be a case fic, something that explores her powers and/or her relationship with the rest of the cast, or, a shippy fic about her and Naru/Dream!Naru. I’m familiar with both anime and light novels, feel free to draw from both!

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): I love the way that Mai slowly grows through the canon, both as a person and in powers. I love how she slowly becomes a part of the agency, how she makes friends and finds a place for herself. She’s just one of those characters that keeps me invested in her and her life and I would love anything focused on her.

What do you like about the canon: I love the mix of supernatural and science, how they are open for each option for every case. I love how it can be deeply creepy but is also full of friendship and love. It’s interesting how they mix various religious practices and don't stick to one thing that works. I also love the slow build as we learn what is actually going on behind the scenes, like Naru’s search for his brother and the fact that Mai for all her upbeat personality is actually very alone.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: My first love is case fic, will always be, but I also love fics centered around Mai’s powers and what they actually are, that tells more about her background. I also ship her with Naru (and dream!Naru). A fic set after the series/light novels would also be lovely, or a straight future fic for that matter!

Anything else? This is just the fandom of my heart. Everything about it makes me happy so I don’t think you can go wrong!

Nikki Galena series - Joy Ellis (Nikki Galena, Joseph Easter)

Request in short: The Nikki Galena books are one of my comfort reads and I find the character of Nikki very fascinating. I love her relationship with Joseph and would love to read about the beginning of their relationship. The cases are usually fun too and I like the extended cast. Crossovers with the author’s other series would also be fine! And, in all honestly, with Nikki’s hatred of flimflam, I think a crossover with a magical fandom or just a supernatural story would be interesting.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): When I began the series I thought that I would hate Nikki, but she grew on me awfully fast. She has a dark side to herself but generally chooses to be a good person. And for all that she seems fairly conservative in her beliefs, she’s good at accepting other people’s beliefs once she’s had a good think about it. She’s just very real, with both bad and good sides.

What do you like about the canon: I’m just a procedural junkie to be honest. I love twisty cases and interesting people and this series gives me both. The setting is a draw as well, as well the broad cast of characters.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: I would love a story about Joseph and Nikki’s first time. I would also love a story where Nikki faces the supernatural (personally, I think that a crossover with Rivers of London would be hilarious). Case fics are always a fave but I would also love something that follows up on old cases. My fave books are probably Stalker on the Fens, Buried on the Fens, Darkness on the Fens and Fear on the Fens.

Anything else? I will be reading the newest book on release, so feel free to use it!

Silent Witness (Nikki, Jack)

Request in short: I’ve just started watching Silent Witness but I’ve already grown fond of Nikki and Jack and the rest of the characters. I would love a case fic as much as a romantic fic featuring these two. I would prefer it if it's set after series 24 with the exception of post-Mexico fic.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing.

What do you like about the character(s): I just find the two very sweet together and I do enjoy watching them solve cases together. I also love the rest of the cast, especially Clarissa and Cara, so feel free to use them!

What do you like about the canon: I’m a procedural junkie. I just love following cases, meeting interesting characters and learning about the extended cast in bits and pieces.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: Too new to the fandom to know! But I would love some case fic, some romance between Jack and Nikki, perhaps some episode tags… Post-Mexico fic where they get together earlier would be interesting, as would something centered around Jack and Northern Ireland.

Anything else? The fandom has a lot of promise, so I’m curious to see where people take it!

Tales of Berseria (Magilou, Velvet)

Request in short: Berseria is such a fun game! It’s fairly dark, Velvet is a fascinating character and I just love the twists and turns it takes. Magilou is one of my favourite characters along with Velvet and I do ship them together. I would love something shippy, alternate endings or a piece delving into Magilou’s character. Please note that I’m not a fan of the Zestiria anime so please leave that canon out.

DNW: Unhappy endings, character bashing, Zestiria anime.

What do you like about the character(s): I enjoy their mix of darkness and light, their complicated pasts and how they still strive towards a future. I love Magilou’s complicated character and how there’s so much that we don’t actually know about her. I love how Velvet is very very clear about what she wants and is going for. They’re just fascinating!

What do you like about the canon: The worldbuilding is rather fascinating and I love Velvet’s straightforward quest forwards that she doesn’t stray from. I love the darkness of it, even though I wish that some people got happier endings (Eizen… And Velvet.). It feels like a proper story where not everything goes as you might have wished it to and people get to be complicated. That said, I wouldn’t protest a happier ending.

What kind of fics do you like in the fandom: I haven’t read that much to be honest, but I do like Magilou/Velvet fic, as well as Magilou-centered fic. I would like to explore both her past and her character.

Anything else? I’m not married to the idea of Zestiria being canon. Should you feel like it, feel free to discard it.

- I have a lot of problem focusing on anything lately. Brain flitters and flutters and doesn't want to stay in place. It's annoying. Keeping focus requires having something familiar going on - like a TV series I've seen before, a story I've ready before - something that centers me. Still annoying.

- Signed up for the Lucian exchange. My beta/partner-in-various-things is making witty comments about laundry due to my other Narnia story this year. Cough.

- I read a comment a while ago about an author being unsure anyone would like to read their story 'cos it was so long. It was a little over a 100k words. I blinked. That's barely long at all! Then I realized: most people don't think that anything under 10k words is prolly too short to bother with. It takes QUITE a summary to make me read anything shorter than that. Just not worth the effort of finding brain and attention for it.

Current Mood: distracted

I've had a hell of a time with my arms the past two weeks. Initially, I thought I had strained them during physical exercise. Then I thought maybe it was an RSI. Now I just don't know. Joint pain that comes and goes from various joints, muscle aches that comes and goes in various places, tendon pain that shows up from nowhere and disappears just as suddenly. I have no clue.

In any case: I can't knit as much as I usually do. I've removed all purling and learned to mirror knit and I've put a timer of 15 minutes that I'm allowed to knit before I take at least 15 minutes break. I hope it will help.

Turns out that coming up with things to do during those breaks is rather annoying though. So far I've picked up origami and making knitting markers. Today, I started writing a story in the Narnia Charn universe - Susan's story in fact, since I've had it sitting in the back of my head for ages. It's interesting to see how the story develops as I write - I never plan but let the story grow inside of my head.

I sorta hope it will become something I can post - the Charn universe has a lot of stories that I could probably write.

I just spent some time reading up on ageism in fandom and...well, it was fascinating. I've been in fandom since I was, like, 10, and I can't say I ever considered age when it came to fandom interactions. Not that I ever really had any - some beta interaction here and there and my fairly accidental IRL friendship with

painless_j aside. Interaction has never been my forte - people tend to be enthusiastic and I get...tired very fast when faced with enthusiastic. In the gaming world though, I interact with people from 15 to...I think G was above 60 somewhere and I'm fairly sure M is up there too. A and O are in their mid-40s. Thinking fannish or gaming to be age limited just seems weird to me. Young fans grow up to big fans after all.

The other day I put in a request to buy a book at the library (The Push, since apparently the climbing bug is spreading) and I'm ridiculously proud of myself since I have huge issues with libraries, librarians and interaction with them (forced socials with the local librarians = panic at the thought of going near them again). Not I just need to put my big girl panties on and go pick it up at the library when it arrives.

Sunny, sunny, sunny but cold, cold, cold means no tulips but plenty of daffodils apparently. The yellow is cheerful and all but I want my tulips! :P

- Brexit is shit. I sincerely hope that something will be decided and that it means I will still be able to visit my Safe Place in Newcastle this summer. Crossing fingers that the something will be sane.

- I'm widening my knitting network and test knitting for other people - mostly so I can use all my cotton yarn, but hey, networking practise? IDK.

- Watched those two climbing movie docus that have been circling around on DW and have decided that both those persons make Perfect Sense to me and that I really did prefer The Dawn Wall to Free Solo. It also made me want to go out in the forest and hug sunwarm boulders again. I haven't done that for YEARS.

- Squeaky cat has gone insane with Spring Feels (tm) and doesn't want to be out or inside or up in a window or sleeping in bed and definitely not quiet. Since she as the Cat Opera Voice things can get quite loud. If I didn't know better, I would've thought we didn't sterilize her, but, well, we did. Many years ago.

- Fighting on with Exercises and Daily Walks. I know it's good for me, but it sure doesn't feel like it when your foot aches and your toes are dancing and your hips cry for mercy. I'd be happier if I had a better explanation for it than Random Hypermobility (tm) from doctors. Or, you know, some way to make it go away at least briefly.

- I'm Very Excited waiting for our tulips to start budding. They're bulbs discarded from the city park last year, taken rather at random at the bulb discard place outside the park. The gardener told the old ladies waiting for it what each heap was but I couldn't grab any then, being due for therapy, and when I got back they were rather mixed up. Mum and I still grabbed a couple of armfuls and planted them around trees in the garden. I really really can't wait to see what they turn into since a surprising amount of them are Very Alive. Hurry up, sun and warm weather!

- Life is Strange.

Executive Dysfunction: It's back again! With bells and whistles! Usually the initiation phase is worst for me, but right now I'm struggling with doing more than breathing. I've always been unable to watch TV or listen to a book without doing one or two other things at the same time. Now I'm having issues doing anything but staring at the wall sometimes. I have gotten some structure up to keep going - a knitting schedule, my walks and, of course, my scheduled home aid session (I have no clue what they're called in English, but I have people coming over three times a week right now to support me with my ADL), gaming dates and friend dates - but it's quite frustrating. Got an appointment in mid-March about it with my new doctor, so until then I get to just hang in and try to keep to the small schedules I can deal with.

Fic Exchanges: Because of the above, I completely missed signing up for Once Upon a Fic. It makes me really sad since it's one of the three exchanges I try to participate each year. Brain couldn't deal with the sign-up sheet though - that's a lot of little fields to fill and...it wasn't working.

Knitting: I did sign up for another knitting test though! A spring tee in sock yarn (I chose a very variegated, very speckled green/white yarn) that will keep me going a bit. I also have my tunic that I'm working on, but I'm currently doing slit patches. It's not very scintillating.

Fic Rec: On a day when I couldn't manage much of anything, I sorted all HP fic at AO3 by word count, featuring Harry and Snape (not as a pairing, as featured characters) and went to town trying to find something to read. I ended up finding Fate Set Right by mltrefry, which is a HG/SS timetravel fic in which Hermione accidentally enters to past to go to school with Harry's parents. At the same time as we follow Hermione in the past, we follow hers and Snape's daughter in the present. It made for a quite different fic from most timetravel fics I've read, and it was quite pleasant in plot and characterization - not too over the top but not too static either considering all the changes. I'm not the person to ask how a "typical teenager" behaves since I wasn't ever one, so I'm not going to comment on that aspect of the povs, but they seemed plausible enough. And, well, 500k words of plot was just what I needed that day.

(plenty of OCs, alternative takes on character personalities and perhaps an exaggerated view on Dumbledore)

--

But yeah, in general, I haven't missed this stage of head. At all. Sigh.

Turns out that February has decided to be a very not-nice month so far. I'm flipping back and forth with my depression as the new meds are settling in, my legs are hurting like a motherfucker (and people say you're supposed to be happy if you exercise? can i have that pls? i seem to be missing out) and apparently I'm not getting enough B-vitamins since my GP told me I should stop taking them. Funny that.

On the bright side, the drop-in doctor I met was a baby one that was absolutely fascinated by seeing symptomatic B-vitamin deficiency. I...live to please?

In short, my head isn't particularly well screwed on atm. My knitting, otoh, is going excellent since that's pretty much all I can convince my head that I can do.

To do:

Get an appointment with mum's Feldenkreis therapist - her contract with the healthcare system is up in March, so if I want to try her out with subsidized pricing, now is the time.

Get appointment with foot specialists so that I can rule out treading wrong when it comes to the pain.

Buy paracetamol to see if that helps with my waking-up-from-pain issues - doctor thought it might.

Figure out how to eat more salt. 'Cos I'm still low on that and I've been trying to eat more ever since the pain doc told me to. On the bright side my levels are stable if low?

1.) Here's the shawl:

( Pics! )I'm quite happy with it, even if I decided on not doing picots. My sanity is fragile enough as it is.

2.) I caught dad's flu. Joint pain, all the join pain and oversensitive. That answers that question.

3.) Looking at my steampunk Narnia story again, it makes me remember a discussion I had with a friend about whether steampunk with renewable energy and clean energy sources instead of coal could still be steampunk. I have a hard time inserting even a fictional world with a lot of horrible pollution, so I'm still a bit puzzled over what to do about that. Friend, who is very much into steampunk, said that No, It Is Not Steampunk Then.

4.) Snow and snow and snowing here. I think that when it has settled down a bit more, I'm going to spend some time outside taking pictures. I'm behind on taking pictures of finished knitting projects, and designers have a tendency to choose test knitters with nice pictures. Since I'm keen on test knitting as much as possible, not having the spare money to buy expensive patterns, photos are important. I'm not good at it, but passable is good enough.

5.) I'm baffled by all the British trousers I'm trying at the moment. In leggings in general and Monsoon, I'm a 16 and 18 is so big they fall off my hips. In jeans I'm an 18. In Marks and Spencer trousers I'm a 20. Oh, and in pretty much all the sizes my ankles are too wide. So I'm basically too narrow waisted, too broad in hips and too broad in ankles. And people wonder why I stopped wearing trousers of any kind for 15 years.

Current Mood: sick

My entire body hurtssssss. I don't know what I did, but all my joints hurt and all my muscles hurt and my feet are doing the itchy pain thing. Dear body, pls gief instruction manual.

Otherwise: finished the beaded lace shawl today and blocked it using pianowire. First time I tried blocking using piano wire, but I have to say it was really good - it kept the upper edge curled as it should be and it was easy to pin out all the, er, pattern things at the bottom. I have no clue what the lace pattern used for the shawl is called. It does look pretty with all the 800 bloody beads in the edging though. Will take pictures tomorrow and put up on Ravelry. Maybe here.

Current Mood: sore

( Health! )

On another note: The Blacklist is sorta nice as casual watching, but wow does the characters get hypocritical sometimes. It can be exhausting. Then again, when I get tired I can ask A to stream some Dark Souls playing for me to watch. Now that is always interesting.

1.) I'm trying Duolingo out of the sudden urge to brush up on my Japanese (I've studied it formally for a couple of years). I'm not sure how its placement test works, but I'm skipping levels like crazy trying to find a stage equivalent to where I am in my learning. Needing a bit of change, I also started French since I studied that for many years. I remember more than I thought I would, but wow does that speakers slur their words a lot - my French teacher had much clearer diction.

I do love being back to language learning though. If lessons weren't so expensive (120 euro/10 hours) I would still be taking them. And I would love to continue studying English formally since I'm only have it on 'paper' up to uni level A here.

2.) I love Bixby (Samsung's Voice) - this is the first time I've been able to use voice with my cell phone and it's oddly pleasing being able to yell at her to turn the alarm off or please calculate this maths for me.

3.) My two major knitting projects right now is a bulky sweater and a lacy shawl with beads. Switching between them today made my left hand so grumpy I had to quit early. I blame purling the wrong side on the lace shawl - I use a thumb flick to get the yarn onto the needle and it started to hurt enough that it radiated down my arm. Time to rest for a day. :S

4.) Can't remember if I have mentioned it, but I walk 15 minutes a day as my New Years promise. I've done it every day so far, so I'm keeping up. My legs, on the other hand, are not very happy. Muscle spasms and aches and just a lot of pain - I feel like I'm stretching them out more than I'm walking them these days. I'm also switching meds at the moment though, so body chemistry is probably weird too. I just started my last dose increase though, so in a week or two I will make an appointment with my GP to take tests and the like as I have been known to be low on salt, B-vitamin and iron every now and then (the iron I usually catch on to 'cos my hair starts falling out in chunks) but better be safe than sorry. Don't want to start exercising my body and fucking up my nutrition.

5.) I dearly want to be able to take part of the world building exchange but my brain just starts spinning when I look at the sign up form. I'm going to save my spoons for the more important exchanges - the sign up forms on AO3 is the most exhausting and horrible thing ever for me. I'm figuring maybe I will be able to treat or something.

6.) I'm tempted to pick up my steampunk AU of Prince Caspian again. That was a fun story to work on.

Did you know that I still have a lot of hang-ups about blog posts? I didn't. I thought they were gone since I made it through most of Snowflake Challenge unscathed. Apparently they're still there and happy to make things complicated in my head. I went to bed yesterday muttering 'I hate all people' (it actually means: why is the world so fucking incomprehensible) again and it was annoying.

It's supposedly morning now. The farmer that owns the surrounding land is shredding stack of logs that has been supporting various beetles and making me sneeze for the past two years. It's overcast, I have my coffee and I finally managed to find a hairclip. Cutting it short for a few months was a good idea, but I had forgotten how annoying my heavy curls at the front annoys me when they hit my face. It now makes sense that I have this huge collection of bobbypins and clips.

( About me: verbose version. )

Day 11: In your own space, talk about your creative process(es) — anything from the initial inspiration to how you feel after something’s done. Do you struggle with motivation or is it a smooth process? Do you have any tricks up your sleeve to pull out when a fanwork isn’t cooperating? What is your level of planning to pantsing/winging it? Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

Well, first off: I definitely wing it more than I plan! :P I've tried all those methods of post-it notes, reference files, research beforehand and stuff like that - it doesn't work for me. If I don't misplace the material, I forget that I even have it. For me, the work has to come straight from my head with a few research excursions or not at all. Which is frustrating sometimes, but not half as much as not writing at all.

(believe me, I lost my writing (and reading) during my worst depressive episodes. that's how my friends knew something was wrong)

These days, most of my stories start from the 'what if'.

- What if the four siblings had gone to Charn before?
- What if Cinderella had left her step-mother's household?
- What if Belgarion had been a woman?
- What if Susan had met a man of faith and fallen in love?

By the time I have the question, I'm usually vibrating with energy and I want to try to write ALL THE THINGS. If I do, it usually ends in disaster and a lot of deleted 'he', 'the', 'the weather' and 'it was' in my Word doccument. What I actually do is go sleep on it. I love detangling plot as I'm drifting off to sleep at night. It serves both as a time without distractions and keep my thoughts off stuff like 'what if the house burns down' or 'what if I can't find my way to the dentist'. Dual duty!

Before I started having depression issues I usually wrote everything chronologically. I didn't jump in my story at all. That ended when depression + autism stole my working memory and I had to actually start to write down my brilliant plot point ideas. The challenge right now is to remember not to use multiple notebooks - stick to the one so that you can find it, that's my rule. I don't consider those snippets 'valid canon' for the story though - just bits of squee that needed to come out and that can act as a guide for the later 'serious' writing.

Examples:

- Solving the Mandorallen doomed romance problem
- How Cinderella left the household - and why
- Jonah and the employment issue - where does he work
- The sibs meet up again after researching their current universe

Most of what I write after that is chronological though. I've learned not to be too picky about language on the first draft (drafts! I never bothered with that in my youth! now I usually do at least one...) and to just get the story out. This is the fun part, of course. This is where the plot gets to surprise me! I love letting the words flow and letting weird combination of words tell me about things that happened in the past - oh my! Backstory, where did you come from? It's part of the charm for me, finding story that I never knew existed as I write.

- Oh, oh! If Garion was a girl, Polgara totally lived with the Algars during her first years! If nothing else, Polgara would need to learn swordsplay rather ASAP to teach Garion so that no one can dismiss Garion as not-suitable-for-ruling.
- Did you know that Susan lost her legs because she followed the spirit of her god's message and not the word, like Peter? They're still not OK with each other over that. Huh.
- OK, OK, Jonah is supposed to meet Susan again now. Gotta get him out of this room... what do you mean she's in the church crying?
- Cinderella doesn't know who he is, check, he doesn't know who she is, check, hmm mb there's a cultural reason for that? Oh, fun!

If I eventually manage to finish the story (the Belgarion one isn't, for example. I have a lot of it written, but not all) I do a chronological re-write. Some people say not to even look at the old draft when writing. I do look at the draft - and then ignore 90% of how I wrote it. Working memory issues again - work with your limitations, not against them.

The trickiest bit for me with writing really isn't the writing itself: it's the finish the writing. That's why I write almost exclusively for exchanges these days. I can't remember and I forget and it slips my mind - stories disappear all the time from my head. It's not about the time pressure, it's about helping myself remember that I'm writing something. I sign up for all kinds of things with deadlines these days just to get to do the things that I like without forgetting it and being unhappy with myself.

I would kill (not really) to be able to finish the Belgarion story.
I really fucking want to finish spell-checking my Buffy/Anita Blake story so that I can re-post it on AO3.
I should look over my SG-1/NCIS story to see if it can be salvaged.

Pick and choose though, is what I've learned. Write what you can write at the moment - especially if you love writing. Writing is more important than not writing because you can't write the story you dearly wish you could.

...and that was day 11. All the typing. Phew.

Current Mood: prickly

Day 9: Commit an Act of Kindness. In your own space, share what you’ve done, talk about what you’ve done, or simply leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

I think I'm mostly fresh out of interaction spoons with me as the initiator, but I did sign up for a craft exchange. I absolutely love gifting craft things, especially knitted items and origami jewelry, but I'm running out of people to gift things to. :) People only need a certain amount of sweaters, shawls and mitts after all!

That said, so far this year I've gifted a pair of customized gloves and my time to help with other people's research. I did offer a sweater to someone, but they had enough. :P

Day 10: Create a fanwork. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

Whipped up a few new icons to reflect current fandoms and stuff. *points at icon*

Day 6: In your own space, create a list of at least three fannish things you'd love to receive, something you've wanted but were afraid to ask for - a fannish wish-list of sorts. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your wish-list if you feel comfortable doing so. Maybe someone will grant a wish. Check out other people's posts. Maybe you will grant a wish. If any wishes are granted, we'd love it if you link them to this post.

A ridic easy one challenge for me - but not one that I expect to be very fruitful. :D The things I want seem to not be quite what general fandom wants though, most of the time. Except recs.

1.) Curated recs list - any fandoms - with summaries, pairings and a little reason why it's recced. I lost track of where people rec when fandom moved to Tumblr - that site was far too visual and busy for me. I miss having people I could follow to find new stories - whether in fandoms I know or not. This goes especially for reccers of epic long fics - I get very very excited when I see fics that are 100+k words that sound amazing.

2.) Eddings fic that takes his worlds, Elenium and Belgardiad in particular, and build on it. I want all the AUs, I want the epic long what ifs, I want fix its for the questionable ideas that Eddings wrote into his world. I have stories on my hard drives doing this - I am writing the stories I want - but I want other people's headcanons damnit!

3.) Ghost Hunt Mai-centered fic. I crave Ghost Hunt fic. I write fic for the fandom myself, I plunder FFN every now and then, but I want more. This is one of my heart fandoms.

4.) This one just occurred to me, but it would be nice to find the blogs of other fannish people with autism/ADD since I'm still figuring myself out after having learned the words for the problems I've been having all my life.

Day 7: Stretch yourself a little and try something new. Go play in a new fandom or with a new pairing. Try working in a new medium. Or check out some fanworks that are new to you.

Oh, I do this constantly, so that's not much of an effort. I did watercolour fanart a lot last year and I don't really draw. I'm not actually even sure what would count as stretching myself since I love exploring the new. Maybe I can count the X-men/Avengers fic I've been devouring since yesterday? I'm not in either fandom, really, and it does contain tropes that I'm usually not very keen on. The reason I started reading it was even to make sure whether it was readable to me or not... :P

Day 8: In your own space, post self-recs for at least three fanworks that you created.

This should be harder than it is, I think. Lately, however, I've realized that most of what I write are things that I want to explore - shiny ideas or interesting what ifs. It doesn't feel as if I'm reccing something 'I wrote shiny' that way, but more 'this was my take on this, it was fascinating to write'. Here it goes!

Charn (Narnia, gen, teen): This is an exchange fic for

narniaexchange . I received a prompt that asked for fic centered on Charn and gave several prompts - including what would happen if the four siblings visited Charn. I took that prompt and ran with it. I love world building, I love writing history and I love what if stories. I didn't have the time to write the entire story, so I focused on Edmund and his experience as the four siblings come to Charn after spending years riding universes as a consequence of finding the rings at the Professor's house. One day I would love to write more in this universe... There's so many more stories to tell.

Noire (Cinderella AU, f/f, teen): A

yuletide story written as a treat very very late one Christmas. I had been hungering to write a lesbian Cinderella and decided to take the chance. It all spun off one picture of Cate Blanchett in a lovely yellow dress and then I went to town with my usual worldbuilding and crazy ideas. Another universe I would love to explore more actually...

Fa Mulan and the Tri-Wizard Tournament Conundrum (Disney Princesses AU, Mulan/Shang, teen) A romp of a fic that I know a lot of people enjoy. I had fun writing it and it's probably one of my more popular stories to date.

Current Mood: amused

My body decided that I needed a cold in the middle of a fairly busy period, so I fell behind on this. Since I'm rather keen on figuring out whether I actually like to blog, I'm still going to continue though! To my chagrin I've figured out that I need to use the rich text editor though - turns out that I don't have the brain power to figure out a US keyboard layout atm (long story short: I use the Swedish keyboard layout on a US keyboard. This leads to missing keys, including the ones necessary to write html) so no html for me.

Onwards!

Day Three: In your own space, share a favorite piece of original canon (a TV episode, a song, a favorite interview, a book, a scene from a movie, etc) and explain why you love it so much.

Hmm. It's actually fairly rare for me to 'love' a canon or have a ¨favorite' these days - I tend to go for canon that doesn't tend to make me emotional. I don't have enough spoons for big variations in emotions at the moment.

But! I shall figure something out... Hmm...

( Dragon Age: Inquisition )

Day Four: Comment to someone you haven't ever interacted with before or introduce yourself to someone you've interacted with and friend/follow them.

...peopleing. Oh my. Well, I did comment on a post from someone I haven't talked to before today. I think. Maybe.

I'm really not good with people though - which is probably why I finally got an autism diagnosis just before Christmas. Well, among other things. :)) I'm happy with replying to people and occasionally chatting someone up in-game, but that's with instant replies. With text... It's quite hard to judge how a conversation should go. But that's for me and my therapist to work on. Next challenge!

Day Five: In your own space, promote three communities, challenges, blogs, pages, Twitters, Tumblrs or platforms and explain why you love them

narniaexchange One of the three exchanges that I participate every year to experience writing even when I'm tired in mind and body. I love challenging myself to write something new each year and explore bits of the world that I've never touched before or try writing characters I've never tried writing before. It's wonderful!

dunannis This is my profile on Ravelry - my knitting home on the internets. If you had asked me a few years ago if I would be an active member of a knitting site, I would've thought you were crazy - if nothing else, I couldn't knit anything more advanced than a hat! Things have changed though, and now I'm an avid test knitter for one of my favourite designers and am trying out all the things.

www.epbot.com Also known as the blog with the most soothing home renovation videos ever. It's just a plain soothing place for me with plenty of pretty pictures.

Current Mood: cold

Day 2: Rec at least three fanworks that you didn’t create.

Oh my! I haven't been formally reccing fanworks for...years. I can't actually remember where I store information on works I want to re-read anymore. Let's see if AO3 can fill me in on some...

( Read more... )

Sidenote: it's incredibly hard to write this with a keyboard layout that I'm not used to.

Day 1: Happy Place

I decided to do this challenge because it sounded like a very calm way of seeing if I want to blog again after all the changes my life has had the last five years or so. I also have a lot of good memories of this challenge - I might've stopped blogging but I definitely never stopped being a part of fandom.

My happy place... is probably the sofa in the home of my friends A and O. It's the place where I feel safe and can be who I am without needing to figure out what bits of me I'm comfortable showing today. Where I can interact with people - or not! - according to how I feel that day. It's amazingly empowering to know that I can choose not to engage - and it leads to me actually engaging most of the time.

At home, my happy place is both simpler and more complicated. My two-seater sofa, our peach-evil-kitty-of-doom next to me, cosy knitting in my lap and a nice medium-impact show or documentary to watch while I chat with a friend or two on Steam.

I'm currently out of medium-impact shows. Netflix needs more British documentaries with good narrators.

And for a completely different subject: where in the world is DW hiding the mood settings? I swear, younger me must have had an amazing brain to keep track of all that.

Current Mood: sleepy

A couple of months ago I decided that I wanted to delete all my content on DW. I didn't know then and don't know now whether I'm going to pick up blogging again, but I do know that all the old content staring me in the face every time I logged in was making me unhappy.

Today I finished deleting entries. I'm now working on giving my DW an overhaul to give it a bit of a distance to what it was.

Until then: Hi! I'm hydrangea on DW and Annis in general. I've been traversing the internets since the mid-1990s. I used to blog heavily in my teens and 20s and now in my 30s I need a clean break from younger me.

See you around!

Current Mood: calm

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Nightly Reminiscing

...life goes on

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Yuletide Letter

Short, short post (cos my brain is fleeing)

Writing and Knitting

I really need to sit down and make more icons hmph

Can't spell worth shit today apparently

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OK, this month isn't panning out like I hoped

Curiosities...

I need more icons, I think

...not again.

Languages, knitting and bodies

attempt 3758937 to write this post. or a post.

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