For Me

I just wanted to write a bit. 

Life has been so super busy over the past several months that it's a wonder how I've survived. Actually, I know how I've survived. The Lord has definitely been with me each step of the way. My mom told me last week that I am just like my Grandma Fullmer. I always have to be doing something. Not just something, but several somethings and usually all at once. Since I adore my Grandma and think she is an angel and just about perfect, that was one of the nicest compliments anyone has ever given me. (I am telling you, this woman runs - RUNS - circles around everyone in the family all at once! She is amazing!) Actually though, I have no idea how she does it because I have been feeling so overwhelmed the past few months. She makes it look so effortless and easy. Grandma is one of the most cheerful, kindest person in the world. 

Anyways, at one point I was wearing the following "hats" (to name only a few):

Wife

Mother

Relief Society President

Day Care Giver

Piano Teacher

Making cakes for events

Scrapbooker

Teacher p/t at residential treatment center (RTC) for at-risk youth

Couponer

Visiting Teacher

Singing in a barbershop quartet

Now, if I was only doing 3 or 4 of those that would be busy but doing all of them was causing me to go crazy! One night (after feeling like I was never going to succeed at anything I was involved in) my husband came into our office and said something to the effect of, "Amy, I think you need to ask the Bishop to be released from your calling." 

(For those of you not familiar with anything in that sentence, 'Bishop' refers to the ecclesiastical leader of the religious congregation I am a member of in the LDS faith, 'calling' is a general name for whatever service position we hold in our congregation - everything is volunteer/service oriented because no one is paid for their Church service, and being 'released' from your calling is when we are thanked for our time and someone else is given the opportunity to serve in that same position.)

I started to cry because I am a firm believer that the Lord calls the right people to serve in the right position at the right time. There is some reason why I am the RS president right now in my life and I immediately felt that being asked for release was not the answer to my hectic life. I began to pray.

Within a few days I had my answer: quit my p/t job as a teacher. 

That may sound easy but for me it wasn't. I like teaching. No. I LOVE teaching. Have you ever read about those people who find their "niche" in life? Well teaching is mine. When I taught 6th grade, while I was teaching at the RTC, I thrived on it. I was excited for work. I could never seem to turn my teacher brain off! (Which was part of the problem since I had so many different things I was doing). I was anxious to do my best so that I could continue to improve as a teacher. Working with kids and teaching them is so satisfying for me. Plus, I have always worked since the summer before my junior year in high school. And that has been since July of 1997. Almost 15 years. Plus, not working meant not financially contributing to my family's income. It meant giving up control of helping to provide for myself and my family. (Those of you who know me and the 'red personality' part of me might realize what a tough thing this was). Then I felt guilty for wanting to still work when I have a devoted husband who works so hard and needs me to fulfill my role as wife and mother as he is so carefully and diligently fulfilling his as husband and father. And why should I want to work when I have the most fantastic, amazing 2 year old daughter to play with!!! Seriously, I thought, what is wrong with me?!? Nothing, I realized. I just like to 'do it all'. 

To make an already long story shorter, I realized that it came down to a few things (for me):

Career vs Family

Job vs Calling

Obedience vs Disobedience

Selfishness vs Service

I had to ask myself, did I have a testimony of being in the home as a mother when I didn't have to work or did I not have that testimony? At the time I quit, I wished I was stronger and that this wasn't a hard decision. I felt weak for even struggling with it. 

I am happy to say that I did take that leap of faith and I did quit my job. All I began to see was President McKay's statement, "No other success can compensate for failure in the home." Then I would see, in my mind's eye, Jessica grown up and all the opportunities I missed with her. I already feel like she is getting so much older! (Side note: so interesting how I can so fiercely miss my baby but be so excited to have my toddler and eagerly waiting to see her as a child/young woman/adult, etc...) Now, I'm not trying to say that working mothers are failures in the home or that they can't be amazing and wonderful mothers. Some women have to work and they do amazing things with their families in those situations. What I am (boldly) saying is this: mothers should be in the home where ever possible. If she doesn't have to work, don't. You will be blessed.

I am loving staying at home. It is sometimes very very hard. It is sometimes very very discouraging. One of my goals this week (in addition to having a perfect Medi-fast week - for those of you who know what I'm talking about) is to work on patience at home.I love my husband and my daughter more than I ever though possible. I am so grateful for a wise, loving Heavenly Father who loves me enough to help nudge me in the right direction. Sometimes, a lot of times, I am still overwhelmed. But. Much, much less overwhelmed than I was and I can feel the Spirit in my life so much more than I did because I made the right decision for me and my family. What a beautiful thing that has been. :-)

Mommy... I Love You!

Usually, when we put Jessica to bed at night, she will sleep through the night with no problems. Every once in awhile she wakes up. When she wakes up she is crying because of a wet diaper or a nightmare. Not tonight. Tonight, about an hour and a half after Jer and I put her to bed, we thought we heard her talking in her room. She got louder and louder until we heard her calling out, "Daddy! I love you! ... Mommy! I love you! ... Daddy! I love you! ... Mommy! I love you!" Jer told me not to go in but my heart just couldn't handle it because it was just too cute! I wanted her to know that I heard her and that I loved her too. I think in his heart of hearts Jer couldn't handle it either because he went in with me. She was just laying in her bed, holding her puppies, and calling out over and over that she loved us. 

When she saw us looking over the edge of her crib (yes, she is still in her crib... big girl bed is being debated after tonight) she just gave us the biggest, best, and sweetest smile. I changed her diaper (it was wet) gave her some more milk and just rocked her for a few minutes. She may be 2.5 years old, but there is something still so sweet about rocking my little angel girl. I won't be able to do it pretty soon and I want to hold on to moments like these as long as possible. She was fine after that and said, "I love you Mommy" and let me put her back into her crib where she went right to sleep.

Ketchup....

Remember that joke about catching up spelled like ketchup? Well that has nothing to do with this post. Except for the fact that every time I think about catching up my blog I get the panicky, overwhelmed feeling as I think about all of the things we have done and all of the pictures I have taken. So. I decided I'm not going to "ketchup." I'm going to mustard which is slacker for "move on". Here's the brief run-down on what we've done in the past 3 months:

January - Happy New Years. We came home from Alaska. Jessica turned two on the 11th. My mother-in-law came to visit the last weekend so we had a Mary Poppins birthday party for Jessica.

February - Happy Valentine's Day. Yep.

March - Happy Saint Patrick's Day, Happy G.A.G. Day (we invented a new holiday involving drawing names, crazy hats, one gift, eating a smorgasboard of Gilmore Girl type foods while watching Princess Bride), and Happy March Madness. Stupid Kansas for losing to an 11 seed  team...can you guess how my bracket did this year?!? Happy competition in Colorado Springs, CO last weekend. My barbershop quartet, Lucky Penny, sang in the Sweet Adeline's Region 8 competition and placed 17th out of 21 quartets. It was TONS of fun and we're excited to sing again next year! :-) Hooray!!!

April - Not there yet so that means we're caught up! *whew*! Now I just need to stay caught up...

Just Because...

I have taken a LOT of time in the past 2 or 3 days to scrapbook. It's been very thereaputic for me. My life, for several reasons, has felt so busy and rushed and full of craziness. Nothing is wrong with that except that I was not taking any time for me to unwind and relax. After crying to a few good friends about it, I realized that I needed to just take a deep breath and remember to take a moment for myself every once in a while. While I have been scrapbooking, I keep thinking about the reason(s) why I decided to spend the time in this time-consuming and not-inexpensive hobby. (Also, why do I blog AND scrapbook?) Well, here are the reasons why I blog and why I scrapbook:

1) I desperately want to have a memory preserved for my chiildren and grandchildren
2) I LOVE to journal & this is how I have decided to do that. I always include writing with my scrapbook pages so that the event or pictures can be told in my own words.
3) Scrapbooking is for me to remember events in my life, blogging is for my family to stay updated on my life
4) Scrapbooking is better than chocolate (which is QUITE the statement to make!)
5) I am able to express myself creatively
6) Both are cheaper than therapy
7) Because I just love doing it...

In any case, this is my contribution to family history. Capturing my own family's history. Every post, every scrapbook page, is it's own version of a photo - a snapshot of one moment in my life. :-)

HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!

December 31st, 2010

And, finally, we come to the end of the year 2010. It was a GREAT last day of the year! We went to Tammy and Tyler's apartment for some our'd'oeurves. It is a darling apartment. Then, we headed back to my parents house where we hosted the family New Year's Eve party... Not just any party, but a 70's themed costume party! We had a "walk-way" where we had to strut our stuff. Then, we voted for the best dressed (sorry I don't have any of those pictures!), ate food, and then had a dance-off on the Wii! Awesome!

Constant talking is part of what our family parties are all about! From left to right: my Dad, Uncle Jerry, Grandpa, Uncle Kevin.

Uncle Troy and Derrall - Troy looks like he's trying to be Italian or something... haha

Tiffany brought her kids. Kinley is playing with Jessica's fisher price house...

We are in the middle of playing a game. From left to right: Jordan (who we call Korean), Dylan, Colton, and Tiffany

CJ is talking to his Mom (my Aunt Tirzah) and Aunt Holly.

Brittany and Brett

Dad, Mom and Grandma

Spencer - I wish I had pictures of the costume portion! He was a kangaroo! Hilarious!!!

Jessica towards the end of the night. She was so tired! Cute baby! Last picture of her in the year 2010...

 As it got closer to midnight, we all piled outside to do fireworks. This was the first year that we could do fireworks in the city. It was a HUGE deal!!! We heard fireworks ALL NIGHT LONG not just around midnight. Anyways, Troy had picked up a bunch of fireworks. My parents live in a cul-de-sac (only one, not to be confused with a culs-de-sac which is more than one... only makes sense and is funny if you are an avid Gilmore Girls fan) anyways, the cul-de-sac makes it easy to gather and do fireworks. Some of the fireworks were Roman Candles. Uncle Jerry was doing those and he decided to shoot one off into the woods. Fabulous. Probably the reason why the city has never allowed people to shoot off fireworks in the first place. Luckily no fires or anything. Then, Payton (his son) decided he wanted to shoot the next ones off. While he was shooting them off, my cousin Jordan (aka Korean) shouted "EXPELLIARMAS!" from Harry Potter and it was pretty hilarious! Then, Payton decided to yell it and stepped forward, waiting for the Roman Candle to go off. It didn't. It was done. It was hilarious! If ever I was wishing for a video of something, that was definitely it! 

Anyways, Happy New Year's! May 2011 be just as, if not more, fantastic than 2010!!!

Missionary Haircut

December 30th, 2010

My brother is going into the MTC on January 5th. Tony needs a more, missionary haircut style. Jer graciously volunteered me to do it. I then returned the favor by nominating him. So, we trooped into the bathroom to do the haircut... Me to take pictures, Tony to get the hair cut, Jer to do the hair cutting.

Haircut is going well... (ignore Tony's facial expression...)

Jer's checking the product...

And this disturbing picture? They were making some sort of pinkie promise or something! Bizarre!

Apparently, you hook fingers, lick the thumb and then touch thumbs together while still hooked by the pinkies. Weird. All I can write (say) is: Weird...

Tony looks awesome though! Go Tony! Go Tony!

Tiffy Tissue & Amy Lou-Lou

December 30th, 2010

My Uncle Greg (my mom's oldest brother) nicknamed my cousin Tiffany and I when we were younger "Tiffy Tissue" and "Amy Lou-Lou"... He then became Uncle Lou-Lou and Uncle Tissue for us. :-) Tiffany is my cousin who is 1 year and 4 days younger than me. Growing up with her was awesome! We were best friends, best enemies (when we fought) and had all sorts of good times together! Now we are "old" and married with kid(s) and it was really really good to see her while I was up in Alaska! She's got 3 of the most adorable children in the world! Keegan, Kinley, and Karson (although, come to think of it... not sure if I spelt the names right! Oops!) Kinley is only a year or so older than Jessica and Jessica had to do EVERYTHING that Kinley was doing!!!

Kinley is sitting on the couch, so Jessica wants to sit on the couch.

What an absolute cutie!!!

Kinley is running towards the couch where she would throw herself onto the cushions.

Cute Karson!

The girls LOVED Derrall!!! He would entertain them for hours...

His juggling act was a really big hit.

I love this little smile of hers!

Karson - cute kid by day, Ham radio operator by night!

Maybe he's just hungry.

He is walking around now and wanted to follow Jessica.

Tiffany and Karson - so cute!

Derrall is doing magic tricks with Kinley. She adored him!

Karson liked playing with the piano pedals.

Peek-a-boo!

There you are!

Jessica: MY couch!

I love this picture of the 3 of them. They were being goofy and rolling around on the floor together. Kinley looks like she's thinking: Ha! Look what I got them babies to do!

Now she's joining them!

If Kinley is hanging upside with Derrall...

Then Jessica wants to hang upside down with Derrall too!

More magic tricks... actually, Jessica is handing Derrall some pine cones for him to keep juggling.

She also found Grandpa's camera and was so excited to take pictures.

We had a great time hanging out and playing with our cousins! Love you Tiffy-Tissue and kids! :-)

Water Baby at the Pool

December 30th, 2010

H2Oassis. What is that? That is Alaska's indoor water park. It's a big deal too. I remember when it was first built. It was ALL that people talked about! (At least for a day or two... haha). Anyways, I've been inside but never gone there to play and swim. During the weekdays, there is a specific time set aside for toddlers called Toddler Time. Instead of paying the $18 per child and $38 per adult, you only pay $6 per child + 2 adults. You don't get to go on any of the slides, but the wave pool, lazy river and kid pools with kid slides are open. Which, let's be honest. For a 2 year old that is MORE than adequate! Our daughter loves the water so much that, before we could even get to a bathroom to change, she became squealing and ran straight for the water in her clothes and jacket! We grabbed her right before she tried to fling herself into the water. Needless to say, she was super excited!

Daddy & Jessica in the Lazy River... she looks mad!

They are each in their own flotation device.

She kept leaning forward so she could kick her legs around.

Arg matey! We be in a tight spot! Arrgg!

Cruisin' along...

Did I mention how much she loves the water?

One in the crowd... can you see where Jessica is?

We traded off. Mostly she loved being in her own thing floating around and around.

We are getting ready to enter the "waterfall" area. We would have to turn our backs to it so she was shielded from most of the water. Jessica does like to have water in her face but not constantly.

I LOVE this picture! You can see her laughing through the waterfall!

*Whew!* We made it!

Hooray!

Princess stepping out of her "flower".

Now we are free-styling it.

Look at us Daddy! No flotation device for us!

After about 2 hours (which is a long time for a toddler to be in water) she pooped out. (Not literally, thank goodness, but just got soooo tired!)

She came right up out of the water and decided she was done.

I love cuddling with her when she's wrapped in a towel after her bath. Swimming is no different!

She feel asleep in about 0.2 seconds after we left H2Oassis.

Fun day! I want to look into a season pass at 7 Peaks for the summer since she will be free... If we went just once a week it would pay for itself in the summer. I'd probably take her twice a week though... Fun! Fun! Fun!