Keeping Pace

Keeping Pace

With wishes of Happiness and Love

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On Memorial Day weekend, my niece Jasmine got married in Oregon and we all flew out to celebrate with her. It was a whole weekend long thing with several activities that spotlighted the couple and the life that they are building together.

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To say that Jasmine really shined on this special occasion would be an understatement. From the 5k fun run to the housewarming hangout, she  sprinkled her own personal touches. Jasmine sketched a drawing of the hills we would run on race bibs for the 5K and had a larger version of the sketch on an easel for all time contribute to paint-by-number style at the wedding reception. She beautified the event with the wild flowers in he table center pieces and bouquets. Meanwhile, Tim put his efforts into insuring the house was housewarming ready by the wedding weekend. We have all been following his work on the hardwood floors, demolishing and rebuilting walls, etc. in Jasmine’s IG stories. Jasmine jumped in to help Tim with the house as well.

Join me in wishing a lifetime full of happiness and love to Tim and Jasmine.

It all unfolded beautifully; so many beautiful moments shared with everyone in attendence. My brother-in-law walking Jasmine down the isle, while tears of joy ran down my sister’s face, was such a tender moment among so many others. I looked on with awe and felt blessed to be able to share in the weekend festivities.

earned, not given

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ImageLast year, when I was in the final stage of earning my Spartan Trifecta, my brother (Robert) decided that he wanted to do the same. You should know that I am one of 4 siblings who have all lead a quite athletic lifestyle – with the exception of Robert. His desire to complete the required races to gain trifecta status would not come easy. I decided that I would accompany him on his journey, and Lil Sis (Carol) volunteered to do the same.

We took on the Spartan Sprint in March, met the Spartan Super in June, and, this past weekend, faced the beast of all 3 races (the Spartan Beast). You should know that while Robert was enthusiastic following the Sprint, he was very apprehensive (if not reluctant) upon completion of the Super to continue on to the Beast. By the time he decided to bite the bullet and register, Carol and I had been signed up for a couple of weeks and all of the earliest start times were sold out. He put everything he could into his training but wasn’t feeling confident that he could go the distance and complete the obstacles along the way. At one point, he thought of quitting. He told me that he thought he was holding Carol and I back and was a little surprised when I told him that we were only doing it to support him. [No pressure]  Of course, he kept trying and added hikes at elevation to his plan of attack. In the months leading up to our final race, I made a couple of road trips to accompany him on some training hikes.

Long story, short. HE DID IT!

ImageBut it was NOT easy. His pain was palpable at times. His determination was admirable every step of the way. It was cool to hear him express his thoughts while navigating the steepest downhill sections (with some uphill thrown in for good measure) the final 5-ish miles. He wasn’t planning to do another Beast, so he was really taking in the experience. Being accepting of the pain, he took my input on how to encourage glute activation to heart.

Meanwhile, I learned to be more receptive to the heel pain which decided to accompany us every step of the way. When I felt like complaining, I’d look over at Robert and the feeling would quickly be buried in the heap of admiration that was growing. You see, this race wasn’t about me… or Carol; it was about Robert.

He put in the work and earned his trifecta!

con·sist·en·cy

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A year ago, BoBo asked me to attend the Holiday Party/Awards Ceremony from his work in Reno, NV. That year, the invitation came too late for me to be able to pull off, so I deferred to the next year (a.k.a. January 2019). The 12 months between events passed rather quickly. In that year, I watched my son put all his energy into his career. Chasing the next promotion, he always seemed to keep his long term goal in mind, foregoing many a late night out that would make it difficult to wake up early the next day. Each week, he would write out his goals and send them to his boss and others as a way of being held accountable. He networked with those whom he admired to inquire on ways to overcome the hurdles he was encountering on his entrepreneurial journey, and acted as a mentor to those who were just learning their way in the business. He did this with admirable consistency throughout the year.

At the meeting this year, when the CEO of the company was describing the recipient of the “consistency” award, I had a hunch that BoBo was the one receiving this award after hearing a minute or two of the introduction. I picked up my phone and began recording the speech – hoping that my hunch was right.

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Of course, I was overjoyed when his name was called. Moreover, I was incredibly proud when I heard what my son had to say as he accepted the award. His ability to speak eloquently in accepting the award was excellent. Thanking his superiors for the opportunity, he left everyone motivated to go after their own success. I was in awe at his grace and composure. He certainly didn’t get from me. But I think I know who he did get it from and know that he would be so proud if he were alive to see it.

Personal Best

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ImageAfter missing his vault, YaYa pulled off his spikes and left them lying there. Since he had to clear 9 feet in order to move on to finals, the season officially ended there. Although he wasn’t able to move on, Track and Field ended on a good note, at least in my eyes.

Although he certainly was exposed to running, this was YaYa’s one and only track season. I know if he was given another season, or even month, he would have continued to improve. I cannot say how impressed I am in all that he accomplished in such a short time.

ImageOf course, I LOVED watching him run. Sprinting was never my thing; THIS was truly all him and I was so proud to see him toeing the line. The final stretch of his races were always indicative of how much effort he put forward. Truly, he gave it his all —  no matter how painful. When he was in the 2nd heat, he had the glory of leading the pack but nobody else to push him but himself. And he did.

It was in the first heat where he really showed his mental strength. I know, from my own experience, how hard it can be to keep your head up and continue pushing yourself when your competition far exceeds your own ability. In his final race, he kept pushing right to the end and never let them out of his sight.
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Then there was pole vaulting. When YaYa first told me that his coach thought that although he was such a big guy he might be able to learn the skill, I was amazed that he had the courage to even try. Try, he did — with all his might.

When competing in the 400 meter AND the 800 meter had him too pooped for his vault, he gave it the 800 meter with the hopes of improving his success. He even gave his triceps (and probably more) a little extra attention in the gym.

Often he made it over but failed to get his arm out of the way on time. He didn’t even knew how close he was to making it to finals until I showed him this shot. In the next frame you can see that he pulled his arm over successfully but didn’t get it in tight enough to his body. Of course he had mixed emotions in seeing how close he was.

YaYa’s success was in the journey. I am very proud. I hope that he is too.

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a day at the beach

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It’s been 10 years since Tom’s ashes were scattered here. The spot unfamiliar to me but very special to him as it was where his newborn’s ashes were scattered more than 20 years earlier. Believe it or not, this is the first time I have been back here. I just couldn’t manage to make it happen until now.

We couldn’t have asks for a lovelier day. DD just happened to be in from New York for his [birth] mom’s birthday. I cut the first rose of spring from the garden to toss out to sea  as we did when we sent his ashes out.  An offering, of sorts.

But the day wasn’t really about grieving. It fell into a day of just being us. We found a quiet spot off to the side near the overpass and threw the ball into water for the dog for a while.  Then the boys played a game of baseball and mocked each other as brothers do.

And right before we left, we walked over to the ocean where I tossed the rose in and watched it get taken away. Today, unlike 10 years ago, the rose only had to be tossed once before it was off on it’s journey. I was a little sad to see it go so easily, but after a bit, I felt a teeny bit of peacefulness fill a little bit more of the empty space that was left in my heart the day he died.

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