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NEW ALBUM ‘HORSEMAN’ OUT NOW

DEEZER

SOUNDCLOUD

The Anks’ 4th album, Horseman, will release on April 14.

TRIVIA!
1) The album name was going to be ‘F is for Missile’, but an epiphany occurred one bright morning, when a Horseman bus drove by!
2) The artwork was excellently crafted by the infamous Blank Plank!

SONG GRAVEYARD: Honouring those who sadly didn’t make the cut
🥀Blog Song
🥀LIMIALONE
🥀Toronto
🥀Rabbit In My Bag
🥀Squirrelzone Cheesechunderbucket
🥀Pebbledevil

Horseman

TIDAL

Christmas Day (Open Your Presents) (2025)

A Single Christmas Single (2025)

The Anks released their debut single, A Single Christmas Single, during the 2025 holiday season. Christmas Day (Open Your Presents) was the A-side, with Grontus El Festive B-ing the B-side.

The Singles

A mysterious untitled, unfinished guitar-based album has been in the works sporadically since mid-2023, with much speculation from fans flooding the internet in recent months. One fan, who asked to be referred to simply as ‘Bogus Joe’, claimed to have found two leaked tracklists: 

ALLEGED TRACKLIST 1 (2023)
1. The Opener
2. Dorothy My Cat
3. John Ham
4. Car Insurance Hair
5. Jeremy Wingus 
6. Grumbus El Monte
7. Shovels In The Sand
8. Bad Time Charlie 
9. The Hills Of Neptune
10. Disco Gerald
11. Don’t Get Confused
12. Shoes I Like Shoes

ALLEGED TRACKLIST 2 (2024)
1. Dorothy My Cat
2. John Ham
3. Auntie Susan
4. Don’t Get Confused
5. Mouthwash Man
6. Snoozy Business
7. Michael McDonald
8. Bank Holiday Jordan
9. Cookie Battle
10. Pasty Man Redux
11. Britpop Ian
12. Horace Oak

‘Bogus Joe’ was later found to have Labrador DNA in his urine.


Untitled Guitar Album

There Was A Funeral (2024)

The fan-dubbed ‘Warbatious Trilogy’ concluded with the bands’ third album, Surplus Volume, recorded throughout the entirety of 2024 and abruptly released to a lukecold reception on Boxing Day. With a fresh new production style (there is now a slither of production), this album promises to entertain / un entertain all 6 fans of the band! 

A tiny EP, Surplus Surplus Volume, would release the following year, and with it coming in at just under 7 minutes, critics were quick to criticise. Notorious music critic Ankony Anktano labelled the release ‘a single, except that it isn’t” and was reported to have felt a harsh ‘High 6 to Low 7’ score. The ‘EP’ saw The Anks delve into previously unexplored genres, such as shit grime.

TRIVIA!
1) ‘There Was A Funeral’ was recorded just 4 days before the albums’ release date!

SONG GRAVEYARD: Honouring those who sadly didn’t make the cut
🥀Plucky Number
🥀There’s Plenty of You
🥀Pork Pie Jerry / Constipated Dog
🥀Micro Rain
🥀Robo Funky Cop


Surplus Volume

Pineapple Chunks (2024)

The following January saw the release of its follow-up, ‘Partial Groove’, which also boasted 13 tracks. Critics have labelled the album ‘At least the 2nd best album by The Anks out of their first two albums.’ The album saw co-writes from Frank McCrank and Independent Bank, and a saxophone solo from the former. The album achieved a 1.9 score from underground music magazine Pitchfunk.

TRIVIA!
1) The album was delayed due to a pesky kick drum mixing error in ‘Maynard Goo’. The Anks, founder of The Anks, noticed the error during a listening ‘sesh’

SONG GRAVEYARD: Honouring those who sadly didn’t make the cut
🥀Cosmic Microwave
🥀Stubby’s Pizza
🥀Disco Gerald
🥀The Hills of Neptune
🥀Bleventeen
🥀Fork Shaped Elephant
🥀Shoe Shop
🥀Cactus McGuffin
🥀Gordon Pistachio
🥀Hummus Cuboid
🥀Space Baguette
🥀Leaves
🥀Crab Dancing Crab Bouncing
🥀Mr Hornet


Partial Groove

Frank Tar Tar Sauce (2023)

The Anks recorded their debut LP ‘Floor Warbling’ from January through May of 2023. Boasting 13 tracks, with at least 2 that are actually pretty nice, this album is bound to knock off your socks! The album includes a Blank Plank-penned song, and a guitar solo from Frank McCrank.

TRIVIA!
1) The name ‘Floor Warbling’ comes from the fact that the album was recorded entirely on the floor! The computer and keyboard sat atop cardboard boxes of varying size
2) The albums’ release date was meant to be (and is stated as) July 9 2023, when it in fact released on July 26 due to unforeseen delays!
3) A handful of songs were formed years prior to release, such as Salmon Lasagne (2021) and Lonely Pringle (2020) 

SONG GRAVEYARD: Honouring those who sadly didn’t make the cut
🥀Funky Trousers
🥀Doctor Robot
🥀Cash
🥀Small Cab Rocker
🥀Only Lonely Blues
🥀If Bees Have Knees Then Why Don’t They Bend
🥀Watering Can
🥀In The Shop
🥀Come To My House Right Away (Bonus Track)

Floor Warbling

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Tales of Ank - A Digestible Blurb 

Born from the ashes of the great bus crash of 2022, The Anks set out to achieve one thing: making silly little somgs. So like it’s going pretty well

THE ANKS HALL OF FAME

The Anks (duh)

Frank McCrank (Features on: Lonely Pringle (2023), Joe Baloney (2024), Unpopular Cup (2024), Co-wrote many Floor Warbling tracks)

Blank Plank (Writer - Plates Are Our Friends, 2023, Album Artwork - Horseman, 2026)

Independent Bank (Co-writer - Zoo Closure, 2024)


Origins & Hall of Fame

The Anks

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The Anks

plop/rock band

MUSIC! STREAM! LISTEN!

Tales of Ank - A Digestible Blurb

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