Winter’s Embrace: January — March

The year dawned with a symbolic journey — a drive from Hyderabad to Bangalore, the city that would soon become home in more ways than one. The skies of Bangalore came alive during Makar Sankranti, as countless kites danced in the winter breeze, painting the heavens with their vibrant hues.

January brought professional recognition that validated years of dedication — a promotion to SDE-3 at Udaan. Achieving this milestone in just 2.5 years spoke volumes about the intensity of my early career journey and the faith my organization placed in me.

February and March marked a defining moment in my life — becoming a homeowner at 25. The purchase of my first flat in Bangalore wasn’t merely a transaction; it was the manifestation of a dream, a testament to perseverance, and a step towards independence. The subsequent weeks of navigating loans and paperwork, though demanding, felt like building the foundation of my future.

Spring of Creativity: April — June

April saw me embracing my artistic side as I launched my photography channel. Through my lens, I began sharing my perspective of the world, finding a community of fellow visual storytellers who shared my passion for freezing moments in time.

May and June witnessed the realization of an adventurer’s dream — the legendary Ladakh bike expedition. The preparation in May built anticipation for what would become the journey of a lifetime. Starting from Manali, I navigated through some of the world’s highest motorable passes, including the mighty Khardung La. The journey tested my limits while rewarding me with views that words fail to capture — endless horizons, stark mountains, and skies that seemed close enough to touch.

Summer of Service: July — August

Post-Ladakh, July offered a chance to ground myself and reconnect with my roots. August bloomed with friendship as weekend getaways around Bangalore created memories filled with uncontrollable laughter and heartfelt conversations.

The month culminated in a profound experience of seva during a week-long satsang in Bangalore. Contributing to the preparation of meals for over 35,000 people in the canteen taught me the joy of selfless service and the power of community.

Autumn Adventures: September — October

September brought moments of spiritual reflection at Adiyogi in Bangalore, followed by the soul-soothing coastal breeze of Pondicherry. The French colony’s charming streets and serene beaches provided the perfect backdrop for contemplation and connection with friends.

October was a festival of firsts. The rhythmic energy of Dandiya night, the excitement of my maiden flight on an Airbus A350, and a unique Diwali celebration — early at home with family, and for the first time, in my own flat in Bangalore, where each diya represented both tradition and new beginnings.

Winter’s Return: November — December

November called me back to nature. The wildlife-rich corridors of Bandipur and Mudumalai during the Masinagudi trip offered glimpses of untamed beauty. The trek to Kaiwara Betta challenged my physical limits while rewarding me with perspectives that only mountain peaks can provide.

December orchestrated a perfect finale. The electrifying atmosphere of Diljit Dosanjh’s concert in Bangalore set the tone for a month of celebrations. The year’s closing gift was a precious family journey through Chandigarh, Shimla, Kufri, and Narkanda. The nostalgic charm of the Kalka-Shimla toy train and the pristine mountain views created a tapestry of memories with my parents that I’ll forever cherish.

Looking Back, Moving Forward

2024 has been more than just a collection of months — it’s been a journey of growth, achievement, and discovery. From the professional milestone of promotion to the personal triumph of homeownership, from the adrenaline rush of Ladakh to the serenity of service, from creative pursuits to family bonds strengthened — each experience has added a unique hue to the canvas of my life.

As I stand on the threshold of 2025, I carry forward not just memories but also lessons in resilience, the joy of giving, the thrill of adventure, and the warmth of relationships. Here’s to another year of dreams, discoveries, and stories waiting to be written!

With gratitude,
CodeAayu

As the years went by, I began to wonder why my search for completeness through another person seemed futile. Why was it that no matter who I met or how deeply I cared for someone, I still felt like something was missing? It wasn’t until recently, after a lot of introspection and soul-searching, that I came to a profound and transformative realization: the problem wasn’t with the people I was meeting or the relationships I was forming. The issue was rooted in my own mindset. I had been approaching relationships with the belief that I was incomplete on my own.

This realization hit me like a bolt of lightning. I suddenly understood that I wasn’t missing a piece of myself. I wasn’t broken or deficient in any way. I was, and always had been, complete in myself. The emptiness I felt wasn’t something that another person could fill; it was a space that needed to be filled by my own self-acceptance, growth, and understanding.

With this newfound awareness, I began to see relationships differently. Instead of seeking someone to fill a void, I started looking for someone who could complement me — someone who could enhance the person I already was. This shift in perspective was liberating. It allowed me to let go of the pressure I had placed on both myself and others, and to approach relationships from a place of confidence and self-assuredness. I realized that a healthy, fulfilling relationship is not about two incomplete halves coming together to make a whole. Instead, it’s about two complete individuals coming together to create something greater than the sum of their parts.

This understanding has been transformative for me. It has reshaped the way I view love, companionship, and my own self-worth. I no longer see myself as someone in need of completion but as someone who is already whole, simply looking for a partner who can walk beside me, complement my strengths, and challenge me to grow even further. This is the essence of a complementary partnership, and it’s a far more fulfilling and empowering approach to relationships.

The Myth of the Other Half

For much of my life, I was captivated by the myth of the “other half,” the idea that we are only complete when we find someone else to fill the gaps in our lives. This belief is deeply rooted in our culture, often portrayed in stories and media as the key to happiness. It offers a comforting narrative, suggesting that our fulfillment lies in finding that one person who can make us whole.

However, this notion can be limiting and even damaging. It implies that we are not enough on our own, leading us to place unrealistic expectations on relationships. By seeing ourselves as incomplete, we risk losing sight of our own worth and placing undue pressure on our partners to meet all our emotional needs. True fulfillment comes not from finding someone to complete us, but from embracing our own wholeness. In doing so, we can form healthier, more balanced relationships — ones where two complete individuals come together to complement and enrich each other’s lives.

Discovering Self-Completeness

The journey to realizing self-completeness is often paved with introspection, self-discovery, and growth. It involves recognizing our own strengths, weaknesses, passions, and dreams. This journey is unique to each individual, but there are common steps that can guide us:

1. Self-Reflection: Take time to understand who you are, what you value, and what you want out of life. This involves looking inward and reflecting on your experiences, beliefs, and aspirations.
2. Acceptance: Embrace yourself fully, with all your imperfections and strengths. Acceptance means acknowledging that you are a complete and worthy individual just as you are.
3. Personal Growth: Invest in your personal development. This could mean pursuing education, developing new skills, engaging in hobbies, or improving your mental and physical health. Growth is a continuous process that enhances your self-completeness.
4. Self-Care: Prioritize your well-being by practicing self-care. This includes taking care of your mental, emotional, and physical health. Self-care is an essential part of recognizing your worth and maintaining balance in your life.

The Role of a Complementary Partner

Once we recognize our own completeness, the role of a partner shifts from filling a void to enriching our lives. A complementary partner is someone who supports, challenges, and inspires us to be the best version of ourselves. Here’s how such a relationship can manifest:

1. Mutual Support: In a complementary relationship, both partners support each other’s goals, dreams, and well-being. This support helps both individuals thrive and grow together.
2. Shared Values and Goals: While differences can enrich a relationship, having shared values and goals creates a strong foundation. It ensures that both partners are moving in the same direction and working towards common objectives.
3. Healthy Challenges: A complementary partner challenges you in a positive way, encouraging you to step out of your comfort zone and grow. These challenges are rooted in mutual respect and a desire for each other’s growth.
4. Inspiration and Encouragement: Being with someone who inspires and encourages you can elevate your sense of self and drive you to achieve more. This positive influence can lead to personal and mutual accomplishments.
5. Emotional Connection: A deep emotional connection fosters understanding, empathy, and communication. This connection allows both partners to share their true selves without fear of judgment.

Embracing Your Journey

The realization that you are complete in yourself is empowering. It shifts the focus from seeking external validation to nurturing your inner self. It also sets a healthier foundation for relationships, where the aim is not to find someone to complete you, but to find someone who adds to the richness of your already complete life.

In this journey, remember that you are your own greatest asset. Celebrate your individuality, invest in your growth, and cherish the person you are. Whether or not you find someone who complements you, this perspective will lead to a deeper appreciation of your own worth and capabilities.

So, the next time you find yourself longing for someone to complete you, pause and remind yourself: you are already complete. Seek someone who complements you, enhances your life, and helps you become more than who you are today. This perspective will not only lead to healthier relationships but also a deeper appreciation of your own worth and capabilities.

With all of this,
Until next time, yours and the only,
CodeAayu

But there’s one question that is now in my mind:

Will I ever go back to Ladakh?

The Perfect Journey

The journey began with the anticipation that accompanies all great adventures. The thrill of the unknown, the promise of spectacular vistas, and the challenge of navigating some of the world’s most rugged terrains filled me with excitement. Each day brought new experiences that felt almost surreal. Riding through the winding roads of the Solang Valley, crossing the seemingly endless More Plains, and finally reaching the bustling town of Leh — all these moments combined to create a tapestry of unforgettable memories.

The high point of the trip, quite literally, was reaching Khardung La, one of the highest motorable passes in the world. The sense of achievement, the breathtaking views, and the thin, crisp air made it an almost spiritual experience. Then there was Nubra Valley, with its sand dunes and Bactrian camels, offering a unique juxtaposition of landscapes that seemed almost otherworldly.

But as I sit back and reminisce about the adventure, a series of doubts begin to cloud my mind. The trip was perfect in every sense — exhilarating rides through rugged terrains, breathtaking landscapes, and a sense of freedom that only the open road can offer. Could a second trip ever match the magic of the first?

The Perils of Revisiting Perfection

One could argue that revisiting a place where memories are made can sometimes tarnish the original experience. What if the roads aren’t as thrilling the second time around? What if the landscapes, though still beautiful, don’t evoke the same awe? There’s a unique charm in the freshness of a first-time experience, a charm that is hard to replicate.

I remember the crisp morning air as we set off from Manali, the feeling of conquering each high pass, and the serene beauty of Pangong Lake. Each moment felt like a scene from a movie, with a perfect blend of adventure and tranquility. Would going back diminish the novelty of these memories?

Then there’s the worry that returning might reveal imperfections I hadn’t noticed before. Perhaps the increasing influx of tourists would make it feel less pristine. Maybe changes in the local environment or infrastructure would alter the very essence of the place I fell in love with. These doubts create a conflict — can I risk tarnishing these cherished memories by seeking to relive them?

The People Make the Place

Then there were the people. I embarked on this journey with a group of strangers, each with their own stories and backgrounds. Over the course of 10 days, these strangers became friends — friends who laughed with me, shared stories around the campfire, and stood by me during challenging stretches of the ride.

Meeting people like Surjit, the local guide with an infectious smile and a wealth of knowledge about Ladakh, and Gautam bhaiya, the solo traveler from Maharastra who had an unquenchable thirst for adventure, and Ajay bhaiya and Vikas bhaiya, who treated me like their younger brother, and the Jain family, who helped me with the veg food and my boring personality, and the Soni couple, who’s newly wed vibes made the group lively and gave me an opportunity for photoshoot, added layers of richness to the trip. We forged bonds that I cherish to this day.

These interactions were spontaneous, unplanned, and added a richness to the journey that went beyond the physical landscapes. The laughter, camaraderie, and shared experiences with people who were strangers at the start of the journey but friends by the end, made the trip truly special. Would a second trip offer the same serendipitous connections, or would it feel like chasing after a memory that can never be fully recaptured?

The Unforgettable Beauty

And yet, Ladakh’s allure is undeniable. The stark beauty of the mountains, the crystal-clear skies, the colorful prayer flags fluttering in the wind, and the serene monasteries perched on hilltops — these are sights that remain etched in my memory. The thought of experiencing these again, perhaps in a different season or with a new perspective, is tempting.

Moreover, Ladakh is vast, with many hidden gems that I couldn’t explore in just one trip. Places like Tso Moriri Lake, the remote Zanskar Valley and Hanley, and the ancient monasteries of Hemis and Thiksey beckon. There is so much more to see and do, and no two trips would ever be the same.

The first time I visited Pangong Lake, the sight of the shimmering blue waters surrounded by mountains took my breath away. Spending a night by the lake under a blanket of stars was magical. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to experience this again, perhaps in the winter when the lake is frozen and the landscape transformed into a white wonderland?

The Call of New Adventures

Then there are the challenges that make Ladakh an adventurer’s paradise. Each trip presents its own set of obstacles, be it navigating through unexpected landslides, braving sudden weather changes, or simply pushing your limits on the high-altitude roads. The sense of accomplishment that comes from overcoming these challenges is unparalleled. Revisiting Ladakh would mean embracing new adventures, facing new challenges, and creating a fresh set of memories.

Exploring the lesser-known trails, visiting remote villages, and discovering new aspects of the culture and traditions of Ladakh — these are opportunities that a second trip would bring. Ladakh is not a place that can be fully experienced in one visit; it’s a land that reveals its secrets gradually, encouraging you to return and delve deeper.

A New Perspective

Another compelling reason to return is the chance to see how Ladakh changes over time. Like any place, it evolves, and visiting it at different times can offer new insights and experiences. Perhaps a future trip would coincide with one of the vibrant local festivals, offering a glimpse into the rich cultural heritage of the region. Or maybe I could witness the stark beauty of Ladakh in the winter, a season I haven’t experienced yet.

Moreover, returning to a beloved place allows for reflection and growth. The second trip would not just be about reliving past experiences but also about seeing how I have changed and grown since the first visit. It would be a journey of rediscovery, both of the place and of myself.

A New Adventure Awaits

In the end, while the doubts are valid, the call of Ladakh is too strong to resist. The fear of tarnishing perfect memories should not hold me back from creating new ones. The first trip was indeed special, but who’s to say the second won’t be equally, if not more, incredible?

I have decided that I will go back to Ladakh. Maybe not every year, but every couple of years, for sure. Each trip will bring its own set of adventures, new faces, and fresh experiences. Ladakh has a way of touching the soul, and once it does, it’s impossible not to return.

So, yes, I will go back to Ladakh a second time. And a third. And a fourth. Because some places, some experiences, are worth revisiting, not to relive the past, but to embrace new journeys.

In the spirit of adventure, here’s to many more rides through the mighty land of high passes.

Ladakh, I will see you again soon.

Until then with warm memories and best wishes,
CodeAayu

The Power Within

Each of us holds within ourselves the seeds of greatness, yet often, self-doubt and fear cloud our vision. To seek our destiny is not just about achieving external success but about discovering our inner strength and resilience. It is a journey that challenges us to confront our doubts and uncertainties, transforming them into stepping stones towards personal growth.

Overcoming Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is a formidable adversary on the path to realizing our dreams. It whispers tales of inadequacy and limitation, attempting to derail our journey before it has even begun. Yet, it is precisely in moments of doubt that we have the opportunity to prove ourselves wrong. By embracing risk and stepping outside our comfort zones, we expand our capabilities and reveal the depths of our potential.

The Courage to Pursue Dreams

Courage is not the absence of fear but the willingness to act in spite of it. It is the courage to believe in ourselves and our dreams, even when others may doubt us or when the path ahead seems uncertain. Each small victory along the way serves as a testament to our courage and resilience, reinforcing our belief in our ability to overcome obstacles and achieve our goals.

Finding Support and Encouragement

No journey is walked alone. Surrounding ourselves with supportive friends and mentors who believe in our potential can make all the difference. They remind us of our strengths, encourage us during moments of uncertainty, and celebrate our successes, no matter how small. Their belief in us becomes a mirror, reflecting back the confidence and determination we need to continue forward.

Embracing Imperfection

Perfection is an illusion that often holds us back from pursuing our dreams. Embracing imperfection allows us to take risks, make mistakes, and learn from failures without fear of judgment. It is through these experiences that we grow stronger, more resilient, and more confident in our ability to overcome challenges and achieve our aspirations.

Celebrating Every Step

The journey towards our dreams is not just about reaching the destination but about savoring every moment of growth and discovery along the way. Each step forward, no matter how small, is a testament to our courage and determination. By celebrating our progress and learning from setbacks, we cultivate a mindset of resilience and self-assurance.

Embracing Change and Growth

Change is inevitable on the path to fulfilling our dreams. It requires us to adapt, evolve, and sometimes redefine our goals in response to new challenges and opportunities. Embracing change allows us to harness its transformative power, turning obstacles into opportunities and setbacks into stepping stones towards greater achievements.

Nurturing Self-Compassion

Amidst the pursuit of our dreams, it is crucial to practice self-compassion. This means being kind to ourselves during moments of difficulty or perceived failure. Self-compassion fosters resilience by helping us bounce back from setbacks with renewed determination and a deeper sense of self-worth.

Conclusion: Believe in Your Journey

In conclusion, the pursuit of our dreams is a journey of self-discovery and empowerment. It is about embracing who we are, believing in our potential, and daring to challenge the limits we place on ourselves. To my friends who may underestimate their capabilities, remember that your dreams are worth pursuing, and you have the strength and resilience to achieve them.

Let us embrace the adventure of discovering our true potential, supporting each other along the way, and celebrating the unique journey that leads us to fulfillment and success. Believe in yourself, for you are capable of achieving greatness beyond your imagination.

Introduction

Self-harm is a distressing reality affecting individuals of different ages, backgrounds, and cultures. It involves deliberately causing physical harm to oneself to cope with overwhelming emotional pain and distress or gain a sense of control. Despite its sensitive nature, understanding the reality of self-harm is essential to foster empathy, raising awareness, and support those who engage in self-harming behaviours. This blog aims to delve into self-harm, shedding light on its prevalence, underlying reasons, potential warning signs, and the importance of human intervention and support.

Prevalence of Self-Harm

Self-harm is a reality that affects a significant number of individuals worldwide. While exact statistics are challenging to obtain due to underreporting and the secretive nature of self-harming behaviours, numerous studies indicate its prevalence across various age groups, genders, and socioeconomic backgrounds. Adolescents and young adults are particularly vulnerable to self-harm, but it can occur among individuals of all ages. Self-harm often emerges as a coping mechanism during intense emotional turmoil or to communicate emotional pain. By acknowledging the prevalence of self-harm, we can break the silence surrounding this issue and provide the necessary support and resources to those in need.

Understanding the Underlying Reasons

To effectively address self-harm, it is crucial to understand the underlying reasons that drive individuals to engage in such behaviours. Self-harm is rarely a standalone act but rather a complex manifestation of deep emotional distress. Individuals who self-harm often struggle with issues such as depression, anxiety, trauma, low self-esteem, a sense of powerlessness, or difficulties in managing overwhelming emotions. Self-harm may provide temporary relief or a sense of control, albeit unhealthy, in the face of intense emotional pain. By recognizing these underlying factors, we can approach self-harm with empathy, compassion, and a commitment to addressing the root causes of emotional distress.

Identifying Warning Signs

Recognizing the warning signs of self-harm is essential for early intervention and support. While self-harm can be a deeply private and secretive act, there are often observable signs that can alert us to someone’s struggles. These signs may include unexplained injuries, the frequent wearing of concealing clothing, changes in behaviour or mood, social withdrawal, persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness, difficulties in managing emotions, or expressions of fascination with self-harm. However, it is important to approach these signs with sensitivity and respect, as not everyone who self-harms displays obvious indicators. By fostering open communication, providing a safe space, and actively listening without judgment, we can encourage individuals to seek help and support.

Compassionate Intervention and Support

Addressing self-harm requires a multifaceted approach emphasising compassion, understanding, and professional support. Creating an environment that reduces stigma and encourages open dialogue surrounding self-harm is essential. Loved ones and peers are critical in providing emotional support by listening without judgment, expressing empathy, and encouraging self-harm individuals to seek professional help. Mental health professionals, such as therapists or counsellors, are crucial in providing therapeutic interventions, including cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) and dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT). These interventions focus on helping individuals identify and manage underlying emotional distress, develop healthy coping mechanisms, and cultivate self-compassion. Additionally, community-based initiatives, support groups, and helplines can provide essential resources for individuals seeking assistance.

Conclusion

In conclusion, self-harm is a harsh reality that requires our acknowledgement and immediate attention. It is a complex issue that affects individuals from all walks of life, regardless of age, gender, or background. By recognizing the prevalence of self-harm and understanding its underlying reasons, we can begin to address this serious concern with compassion, empathy, and effective intervention.

We must break the silence and destigmatize self-harm by promoting open dialogue and understanding. We must create safe spaces where self-harm individuals feel comfortable seeking help and sharing their struggles without fear of judgment. By fostering empathy and providing unconditional support, we can encourage those who engage in self-harming behaviours to reach out for professional assistance and access the necessary resources for their recovery.

Remember, self-harm is not a choice but a desperate attempt to cope with overwhelming emotions. By acknowledging its reality, we can extend a helping hand, offer understanding, and positively impact the lives of individuals who self-harm. Let us stand together, raise awareness, and work towards a society where compassion, support, and mental well-being are prioritized, ensuring that no one faces their struggles alone.

Yours and Always available,
CodeAayu

Maybe we are not searching for life in the universe but an alternative to hiding the fact that we are destroying the one we have.

As I look above, from this wicked city, which is supposed to provide me with my life, I see nothing but greyish black colour with one or two visible stars and sometimes our moon. Obviously, when they should have been visible!

I wonder where all those stars went, to whom I looked to in the clean cold nights from my home in my childhood, or all of that is just a dream, and I have been living in the same type of place from childhood?

Are we really looking for life out there in space, or are we just engulfing ourselves here on earth in the trap of a gas chamber made by ourselves? Are we really looking for life on Mars, or are we looking for earthly life possibilities on Mars? I know that both might seem the same to most of you, but both are really different.

Looking for life on Mars!

It will mean that we need to explore our universe, starting from our closest neighbour, the Red Planet, Mars. We want to see if we are really alone in this solar system or something, but this seems not to be the case. I will tell you why I feel so. If we really wanted to do that, we wouldn’t have SpaceX, but a company that would help NASA to look deeper into Mars to look for underground microbian colonies which the hard, dry surface might be protected from harmful radiations, keeping it cold and protecting it from those heavy dust storms every week. We just saw the surface, declared it uninhabited from life (earthly life, mind this). We still found some salt trails, which meant oceans or rivers in the past. We started making plans, out of which one is still on. And that includes nuclear bombing on the surface of Mars to create an environment colder due to a nuclear holocaust, which will let us live there with an atmosphere and liquid water on its surface in a couple of decades. Now let’s look into the second thought.

Looking for Earthly life possibility on Mars!

When I think of this, it can mean only one thing. We behave like the West of the 18th and 19th centuries, which means that we consider ourselves higher than others (as a dilemma created by some) and try to occupy or colonize Mars. But we all know the reason why the West did what it did to the East. It needed resources; its own land was not enough for them. We are destroying our own habitat and ignoring this. We are trying to find a place as a substitute, and as we know we need to make it livable, we are first trying to find a ready-made place; if not, we are trying to make the nearest place livable. Why do I feel like this? Again because of SpaceX. I have read a line on its website, its slogan, and that was, “Occupy Mars!”.

Now this space travel is here!

As if NASA, ISRO, CNSA and all the other government-controlled and monitored space organisations were not enough, now the private corporations, with CEOs having a wild dream of going to space, are here. If someone got the chance of looking at the launch of the test flight of the Blue Origin, one would see how much emissions that made!

Are we going to this extent to satisfy our outgrown dreams of going to space? And what will we get from this? Some super-rich people satisfying their wishes by throwing in loads of money that will destroy the life we have here faster.

What should be done?

The money and resources that we (as the whole human race) are spending on this stupid space race should be used to make our earth’s life longer. We are investing a fraction of our total space expeditions, in delaying the tipping point of climate change. We should spend more on that than this bullshit that is just satisfying the dreams of riches.

It’s not a bad thing, to do what you have always been dreaming, after all this hard work, and earning everything you have until now. But mind that you are not the only one paying for this, even if the private players do not want to spend on reversing this climate change; it’s just that it should not contribute to reaching that tipping point a little earlier. Instead of colonising Mars, we should help in saving our home first. Maybe those companies are already doing it, but they can do much more by not spending huge amounts on space travel. Let’s focus first on our planet; we saw many cyclones in the Indian subcontinent in the last 12 months and now a flood in Germany, while Iran is facing an acute water shortage at the same time. Let’s focus on the problem at hand before taking up new projects to make space accessible for us.

I have nothing against these companies and those smart people trying their best to make space travel accessible for humans, but we need to ensure that the humans will be here for a long time. It’s the timing of these companies that I don’t like. I was also a space fanatic and still am, but when I look at the world news updates daily, it pains me and scares the shit out of me. I don’t see a good future living condition for myself. I feel like, for what am I doing all the hard work now? What will I be doing with all the money that I will earn and save for the future?

Let’s just think!

So, let’s think for a moment about what should be our priority? Another planet to be habitable in the next 90–100 years or trying to save earth for another 100 years so that we can think of making space accessible later on for a future generation?

Yours,
CodeAayu

What’s actually happening?

We are attending multiple Google meet classes each day, where we just join and sit back. You know, we never learned from the classes itself. We used to learn from our classmates, our fellow students and now it’s all gone. It’s frustrating to the extent that final year students have left attending their last classes of life for good. This isn’t gonna help us in future. We are tired even before starting our work life. You know, I am a final year student of one of the institutions of our country who are known to have one of the best college lives around. But here we are, sitting in our homes, 14–15 hours on screens, getting more and more into something like depression, we don’t know. Maybe this Covid-19 pandemic gave an upgrade to the depression and we need to define a new term for this feeling because it’s not depression but it’s a lot similar, it’s utterly disgusting and exhausting

What’s making it worse?

We are having our placements online. And to make it worse, our education system, that judges us based on a pointer we get from those classes, is making our lives miserably hard. We have tests at 6 PM almost every other day, classes till 6 PM every day, quizzes every second week, assignments and lab work to be written for weekends, attendance to be marked to get our assignments actually checked for scoring. After all of these attempts by our education system, if an android(human-looking bot) somehow managed to pass all this, and gets shortlisted from the test for an interview, they are gonna happen in day-time, during weekdays and no exemptions will be made by our academics.

What am I missing here?

Isn’t the whole point of doing this 4/5 years of an Engineering course was supposed to make us ready for the industry? Then, when I am actually getting some chance to work there, why is the same system making it too hard for me to get in the process of getting in there? The same people, those exactly the same people, who are doing this are gonna give a speech the very next month, when the new entrants will be here, on how they are here to help us and prepare us for the industry. How hard is it to understand that students are there at their respective homes to go through the pandemic safely, they didn’t take a long holiday and taking a salary from you for which you should give them workload!

And all this is happening in October-November. The time of festivals in India. There was supposed to be at least a week vacation this week for Durga-Pooja but as the classes are online, the administration feels that as people are already at their homes, why do they need a vacation? If anyone is reading this, who is at any administrative position, I am calling out to you right here right now and I want you to read the next part carefully!

Why do you need a vacation when you are at home already from past 7 months? How you dare ask us this! We have been attending online classes from morning to evening, we have been writing our assignments on weekends, we have been giving interns/placements tests after 6 PM, we have been giving interviews, and YOU HAVE BEEN USING OUR RESULTS TO SELL YOUR COURSES! We need a break, we have been subjected to quizzes every second week, classes every weekday, vivas in every lab, assignments, non-compulsory yet threatful attendance, shortlisting tests, interviews and whatnot. An average student is spending around 12 hours a day on screen, and this gives depression, we have been unable to meet our friends, chill out on weekends, go on skating at nightfall, go to morning chai dhabas in groups after a whole night movie with friends. And YOU, instead of realising all this and easing the pressure on us because there’s no releasing it out, you have subjected us to even more pressure! How can you be this inhumane?

Let’s stop the rant and suggest some solutions!

First of all, it’s the festive season, it’s been 3 months of regular online classes without fail, maybe give us a break of a week or two.

Stop giving home-work or assignments outside the class period. We all are already going through a lot and the course we are studying is not gonna help us to get a job, and you know it. Give us time to study on our own.

Instead of 5 days week and 2 days off as weekend, spread out the weekend.
Give Thursday and Sunday off. It should be 3–1–2–1 week, not 5–2.

Stop with this idea of quizzes, everyone is getting the exact same marks, you can proctor all you want, but this is not helping you or us in any sense. It’s just teaching you how students can cheat in online exams and teaching us how we can cheat more effectively in online exams. Maybe, learn something from the marks of the quizzes that happened already!

TALK TO STUDENTS! They are the beneficiaries of the education system, aren’t they? So, why are you not talking to them before deciding anything for them?

What should the students do?

Don’t accept just anything, there are good professors, teachers! Talk to them, express your views, tell them what you are facing and then cross your fingers and hope that they will understand. Raise your voice! And if nothing works? Stay there, uphold yourself! Just don’t do anything stupid. Stay safe and healthy. If you are not able to upskill yourself in this pandemic, it’s OK, it’s not a rat race, it’s a pandemic, we need to stay alive and healthy, physically and emotionally! And if you need a place to rant it all out, come to my inbox, we will do it together.

Yours truly,
A human (not a robot) just like you,
CodeAayu!

It’s always a nice thing to discuss. People try to be open about their past, try to do something that will help them in their better future. But, are they really living the present that they created in their past as a better future?

If you are not gonna read it completely, please read the last paragraph at least, it might help someone!

Let’s find out with a story of my friend!

This is the story of a friend, who has no present, has a terrible past and a startling future. Well, this may seem to be a good growth graph in life, but there is one problem with this person. He has the same story, at each and every moment in his life, for the past many years. He seems to miss one point! He seems to miss a line! A line that he wants to cross but as he keeps speeding towards that finish line that takes him to a better future, the line is also speeding at the same rate. And he keeps pushing it harder and harder, and the present that he is present in keeps shrinking and shrinking. This present is what is gonna make his past in near future and when he or anyone will look at it, it will be terrible, because he never got to live it!

Let’s explore his story a bit more!

He is in 8th standard. A bright student for his parents, teachers and classmate’s parents. He completes his Science and Maths textbooks of the academic year in summer vacations and then tries to overthink and cross-question everything that he wants to dig deeper into it. Well, for his classmates like me, he is annoying, he is over-achiever of his classmates and has no social skills. He seems to be disinterested in these things as well, he seems to be interested in getting over it as soon as possible and he takes the high road of competitive exams to spend some time. Result? No friends, no school memories except debates.

Now he is 10th standard. Everyone knows he will go for coaching, will study and gets a good college. But for people like me and all the other classmates, that thing seems to matter the least. Teachers used to say that, study now to get a better future, and he seems to have taken up this deeply. Well, others like me, we were happy with our present. Result? School year passed by, he got highest GPA, along with 7 others, and life moved on.

Now he is coaching for 2 years, in the worst city for such people, Kota. The city that can make lonely people zombies, the city that can find your deepest hidden desires and use that to fuel you to be a robot. Well, for him, it was not a desire but a saying that was told to him like a zillion times. Work hard now to get a better future. In this period, he got into this thing at the level that he lost connection with the only people he actually had one, his parents. He is all alone, clinging to working harder, for a better future! Result? A 60–40 robot-human came to a city and a full robot got selected into AIIMS.

Now he is an AIIMS. A robot, who never had any friend in school, nor in his coaching. A guy who is even now told every day that work hard to get a better future. He started this, but now he is not a school kid anymore, who can do things that he doesn’t like with attention. He started getting disinterested in everything and for the first time in his life, he started failing in things he wanted to succeed. In academics, in his professional career building, in his social skills(which he never had in the first place and college is hell for such people). He came in contact with people he thinks he can be with for his lifetime. But he forgot one thing. It’s not his fault actually, he was always told, work for your future. No one ever told him to live in the present.

Today, he called me. Told me about how he lost a person, that he thought he will be for his lifetime, how he tried to do everything that will help in building their future together but still failed. I asked him one thing, just one thing, how were you both in your present? He was clueless, he didn’t know how was his present and I got him. I knew him from his school-time. He never really knew anything outside the future building part of his life, that was his life totally and I laughed at first when he got into something with the other person. He was the most unbelievable guy that someone can come up with. I knew what made him start to lose things that he should have got easier. He was never truly present in the present. Maybe it’s his fault, maybe not. Maybe he was indoctrinated a lot about building his future. Maybe it was my mistake also, I saw everything but kept silent.

Result?

He is lost now, he has everything that a student at his level can ask for. He has his future secured. But as a person, he is lost. He doesn’t have friends, he doesn’t have a single person(not even me) in his 500+ contact list to which he truly can open to, there was the only person, whom he lost in the present while securing their future.

What can we do?

Well, I and a hundred others in his vicinity were not able to stop him becoming like this. The least we can do is, we can stop others reaching the tipping point.

We can Stop asking to people to secure their future before they can live their present atleast.

We can tell the ones we know who are at this point that living in the present is more important than securing your future.

LIVE THE PRESENT FIRST! FUTURE IS NOT PRESENT AT THE PRESENT!

Let’s see why it is important for you to read this blog completely.

Before we talk about it, let me tell you a short story, unfortunately, it is a true one. There was a 3rd-year student of IIT-Hyderabad who ended his life in the last week of October and it again started all those debates on related topics. I was watching one such debate where one of the professors from another IIT(I will not mention the name) said, “That kid was weak-hearted. If he can’t take such a small academic pressure, which the other 2000 students are taking in and proving to be excellence, then how was he supposed to take the pressure of all the life problems he was gonna get eventually.” Well, some of the people in that debate agreed to him and the debate continued.

What’s wrong with this statement? Why am I writing a blog on this?

First of all, suicide is not an act of cowardice. Going to a ridge is easy, but taking that one step to jump knowing that you can’t undo that is not an act of a coward, it takes a lot of courage. Secondly, it promotes a very bad image of our society in which you are not supposed to talk to others about the pressure on you. Because people will eventually judge you that you can’t take that pressure and stuff like that and if you are going to people like that professor to talk about the situation you are in, you know what you are gonna get as an answer.

Should it be this hard to talk about such a common thing that by now, in the year 2019 alone, there have been 17 suicides only in the IITs? Until and unless we make this easy for people to come to us to talk about their situations, this problem will continue to prevail.

But, before anything else, we need to understand that the problem is there. Most of the time people say that suicides are one in a 10 thousand so it’s not really the problem of the system. You need to understand it first, that the people who are doing such things like suicides are not the only ones who are fed up. Weak people often get into depression, can’t really talk about it to anyone, not even friends because they know that they will not be taken seriously about such kinds of stuff, can’t take extreme steps like dropping off the thing that is giving you such pain in the heart, or suicide as it takes a lot of courage.
Let’s take the example of the IITs. They are supposed to be the dream come true places as this is a dream of each and every student of 11th-12th in Science division to get into one. So, they are supposed to be happy, right? Is it too much to demand, to be happy at your dream place? But talk to people here, you will see dull faces, going to compulsory classes, practicals that make no sense, Computer Programming assignments are written on paper using a pen, etc. 80% of the people are not happy from where they are. But all we see is, that there was 1 guy out of 2000 admitted, who was fed up and did end his life. What about those people who can’t take those steps because of their family responsibilities, fearful nature, or anything of such sorts. Is it worth punishing(yes, it feels like this to almost everyone) the students who did all they could to achieve the dream of their parents, families, society because only 5–10% of people actually wanted to attend IITs to study?

Is it that big of a mistake?

People are just living their lives, trying to spend this time as early as possible because it is unbearable.

So, what now?

It’s always the same. The same ‘My doors are open!’ texts will be sharing on the statuses, posts with #youAreNotAlone will be shared and then what? Will, anyone come to you if you have been nothing but a terrible friend/junior/senior since his/er college life and now just posting this. A person who is actually in need needs to know that you are truly open, not just for the sake of sheep herding that you are copy-pasting such posts and posting them over social media after someone did end his life and your posts will be lost in a week and it will be unavailable when someone actually will be needing it.

So, what actually needs to be done?

Well, I tried to explain that by the title of this blog. Stop considering Suicide as a taboo. It is not. Stop considering suicide as non-existing/too rare. It might be but the depression that leads to suicide is not rare, it’s too common that you need time to find a guy who is genuinely happy. Suicides rates are rising because we are pushing the people in depression to the edge at a faster rate now. And this is not just because of some silly academic system of our society, it’s because of everything that surrounds us. We have become too heartless to understand the people and their plights. We laugh at people in misery, we think that this is not our issue so we don’t need to raise our voice. Well, you are wrong, if the same thinking continues, there will be no one left when it will be your turn and only your voice will not be enough. Be polite, be responsive, be responsible for your own people. Even if you have a slight problem, talk to your friends/parents/cousins/seniors about it so as they can know that you are open to them if in case they need you. Do it for the sake of friendship, for the sake of humanity, or whatever reason you can find to compel you but just do it as it might not save a life but it will surely make some live his/her life like they really should, Happily.

And again, not only for the custom sake, and believe me when I say this, My doors are literally open, don’t think that I have some work that helping you is less worthy than any of my important tasks. Ping me on Facebook, WhatsApp(8873643965), Linkedin, etc. anywhere you can find me and just talk, please talk before taking any harsh steps. I promise to not give sympathy talks or any craps like that, your identity will not be disclosed.

Yours,
CodeAayu

What is this blog about then?

This is about how would you even know that he is telling you the truth? How would you know if he is not just making things up? Asking him to predict(for you, basically telling) the future is not the best way to do it. You know why? Because there are machines, super-computers today which can do that precisely. So, how would you do it? How would you verify if he is actually a time traveler?

Let’s find out!

So, you might ask him to explain time travel first, but that wouldn’t be the best thing to do. It would be exactly the same as an alien asking an abducted astronaut to tell the secret of space travel. Well, my point is, a driver always doesn’t know how his vehicle is made. You might want to try some biological tests on him, but that will not help if he is from the near future as well. So, how would you do it? Well, I would probably ask him to take me with him on the next adventure, if it’ll not break some rules, which might be there.

So, is time travel really possible?

The answer is YES! We actually have time travelers in our time, we just don’t realize it so well. Well, time is considered as the 4th dimension of space-time continuum by Einstein in his relativity apart from the length, breadth, and height, which makes up space. According to his theory, time is a dimension so you can move through it and gravity actually moves in space-time rather than the only space. So, you just need to be near a heavily dense object to travel through time, but as the length can’t be negative, time also moves only forward. yes, it’s true that it can move slow or fast but it only goes in front. Well, this is what Einstein’s theory says. So, pack your bags and move to Sagittarius-A, the nearest black-hole, to travel through time.

Well, when I said that we really have time-travelers in our time, I meant with the astronauts on International Space Station. They move at speed about 8kms/sec, which makes them experience time slowly. Well, it is only about a hundredth of a second but yeah it is true.

Then why was Stephen Hawking’s party not attended by anyone?

I hope you know about the party for time traveler’s was organized by Stephen Hawking on June 28th, 2009 in the United Kingdom for which the invitations were sent out after the party to see if backward time travel is possible, but to no one’s surprise, no one showed up. But, does it prove that backward time travel is not possible? No!

Maybe, are we all wrong?

Maybe, we all are wrong. Maybe, we don’t see what we really want to see. Even if backward time travel is possible, maybe it has some rules. Like, you can’t mess with some other timeline. Maybe, time is not really a single dimension, maybe it’s a set of linear vectors. It’s all a maybe until we see what it really is. Maybe, someone did really attended that party but it created a new branched timeline that we don’t know of, yet!
Or maybe, that no one attended Stephen Hawking’s party is, that time travel may not be that precise. Maybe the guests from the future did arrive, but they were too late for the party. Or maybe going back in time is strictly prohibited for the time travelers, because if they do, they might change their timeline completely and will be in a new timeline where they can’t go back to the time they came originally from.

Now, a surprise!

As you are reading this, you are invited to a reception for time travelers, hosted by Stephen Hawking.
The party will take place at the University of Cambridge, UK, on June 28, 2009. No RSVP required.

And hey, if you have a chance to jump on a spaceship and enjoy the time-traveling effects of a black-hole, DO IT! Just make sure not to fall into that gravitational monster, as your life is not in Interstellar, the movie.

Tell me your views on all of this in the comment section and we will see if we can host something like this and maybe someone from the future will attend, maybe India is far more reachable than the United Kingdom. :P

Yours,
CodeAayu