My eyes look deep into the wall,

A dark deep crevice I notice,

Hundreds of people push past me,

Yet not one stands to notice,

A tiny diligent ant walking in,

Determined and ferocious,

So steadfast in its goal,

Not different from the people around me,

In that one moment.

Is it hunger, I wonder,

Is it a need, Is it fear,

Is it a want, I wonder,

What does keep the ant so ready to walk in a dark dark crevice?

Does the ant know the crevice?

My mind asks, was it born here, inside the crevice, on a big wall,

Or did it shift from a tinier hole somewhere?

How did it adapt, how did it grow,

Did the ant cry, did it laugh,

Does it even have support?

My mind turns morose, I wonder,

Does the ant have love,

Does the ant get appreciated for all it does,

Will it even be remembered in the future?

I then look at the path the ant went in,

And notice another,

This one more determined, diligent, steadfast,

I now wonder if there is a message, they are trying to tell me?

I was happy, Mummy,

For I was created, I expected love Mummy,

Does my existence cause you pain Mummy,

You hated the sight of me.

I smile at you, you hit me,

I cry inside, you hit me,

Am I too much of a burden Mummy?

Did I do something wrong Mummy?

I moved my hands, and you scolded me,

I stretched my legs, and you hit me,

Do I not move Mummy?

I will do as you say, let me know Mummy.

I am growing up Mummy,

Why did you leave your house?

Do I hurt you Mummy?

You look at me in pure pain.

I open my eyes Mummy,

You’re angry at you, Why Mummy?

Is it because of me?

I will be out to comfort you Mummy.

I am coming out Mummy,

I will shelter you under me,

I will protect you Mummy,

Please try and bear me.

Why Mummy,

Have I done something wrong Mummy,

But I just came out Mummy.

Am I a sin Mummy?

Why was I left away from you Mummy,

Did I make a mistake Mummy?

Please don’t abandon me.

~Achuuth Karthick, 4.4.2021

What is it that we need?

What is it that we seek?

Is it money, is it happiness,

Or is it the love of a dear one?

Do we look for appreciation,

Or someone who looks up to us,

Do we seek retribution,

Or someone who loves us,

Why are we lost,

Lightless, damp, and cold,

In a cave of knowledge locked on all sides.

A candle of hope,

A single smile, A praise,

A good word, they all protect,

But do any of us know what we really seek?

Are we all birds, who build nests and fly,

Or queen ants who build their homes, and never do leave,

Do we give ourselves wings, or tie ourselves down,

With unreal chains of affection and necessity.

Tell me, my dearest reader, are we what we seek,

Or are we in a race, with none of us at peace,

Each rushing to follow a lie,

Each blind to the truth in front of us,

Looking for an escape that is not,

Do we even ever find what lies beyond the great divide?

What even is enough?

Achuuth 7.12.2020

I am a MA English student, first year, and I spend most of my time reading, watching a show, or probably talking to someone. If I’m not doing these, I am probably sleeping or eating. My interests are varied, and I hope my writing is relatable to you.

My entire Medium is going to be random pieces of writing, which I hope, someday make as much sense to you as they do to me.

Ganesha has always been very special, a friend more than a God.

This specific piece was written when I saw a post for the Greek god, Dionysus in Sanskrit, and I thought, Wow! That’s some beautiful cross-culture art, and voila, I’m here to share stories from Hindu mythology and shower my praises on the gods I have grown up with. I really hope you like it. This is my first attempt, would love to know what you think.

P.S This is the first post, and Ganesha is considered to be the Harbinger of luck and good fortunes, hence my writing referring to him as a friend, mentor, guide, and divine.

Someone to hide behind,

Big of ears, with tusks,

One and a half of them,

A hand telling me to not fear,

A hand giving me everything I know and don’t know that I seek.

I bow to you,

My dearest Ganesha,

You the one remover of obstacles,

Who protects me without song, lights, or grandeur.

A single moment in my life,

Does not pass by,

When your watchful eyes

Do not observe me,

Your light, grace, and presence

Make me the happy one I am.

You save everyone, regardless,

Protect me, from unrequited needs,

Take me through the right path,

You my guide, and I your follower.

Carry me through,

Guide me by the hand,

My dearest VIgneshwara,

Destroy my obstacles before they come infront of me,

Let me remain hidden, unknown from them,

Basking in the glory of your presence and light.

Lead me through my miseries,

Hand chosen by you,

Let me live upto your beliefs that I will overcome,

Every pain that life causes me,

Protect me my dearest Vinayaka,

For you are the first to be there for me,

Yesterday, today and forever.

Achuuth, on 7–12–2020