I’m not going to throw a cliché “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take” quote at you. Instead, let’s talk about economics. Let’s talk about the Pareto Principle.

The Pareto Principle (or the 80/20 Rule) states that roughly 80% of your results stem from just 20% of your causes. When I look back, the anchor points in my life — critical 20% — were results of pure, unadulterated audacity. And honestly? The 80% payoff turned out to be pretty great.

Those 20% moments were the times I took a massive chance. Maybe it was because I had nothing to lose, maybe a misogynist bruised my ego and I had a point to prove, or maybe the concept of failure just didn’t cross my mind. These were the choices that ripped me out of my comfort zone, prompted my friends to say, “Go easy on yourself, you Capricorn,” and demanded massive, uncomfortable change.

The Brutal Truth About Change

Change is difficult. I could dump a list of motivational quotes here to sound wise and all-knowing, but the candid truth is that there’s no easy way to handle change, and no quote will actually do the work for you.

That is the entire point.

Change is not supposed to be comfortable. You are not supposed to find a shortcut or a life hack to avoid the struggle. Whether personal or professional, change is what forces you to grow. You struggle because you are in unfamiliar territory, and making that territory familiar is the literal definition of growth.

I could offer you empty comfort and say everything will be okay. But the reality is that you just have to work through it — all while maintaining the constant, slightly delusional belief that you will come out the other side just fine.

Your Toolkit for Navigating the Mess

I can’t give you a WikiHow article to simplify your life, but I can help you navigate it with some tools:

• Focus on the payoff, not the pain: Is it a personal mess that’ll leave you with stronger sense of self, or a new team where you’ll learn cool new stuff? A difficult manager? Maybe you’ll end up figuring out how to handle difficult people, or you’ll brush up your resume and move on. Keep your eyes on the prize.
• Identify your point of control: Is this change intrinsic or extrinsic? If it’s intrinsic (you chose it), revisit your original motivation for change. If it’s extrinsic (forced upon you), it was never in your hands anyway; you might as well go along for the ride.
• Find the friction: What is making this change difficult? Is it the environment, the workload, or specific people? Once you identify the friction, you can minimize it. Can a mentor help you navigate office politics?
• Get an Outside Perspective: It is easy to go down an overthinking spiral during a change. Some problems just need a second set of eyes. Share your experience and difficulties with your people (*before things escalate).

The Sanity Check

My love language is pushing people to become the absolute best versions of themselves. I could write another 500 words about how the worst situations are just good changes in disguise. At the end of the day, you’ll only be able to figure out your shiz if you’re sane.

You might think everything will work out if you just push yourself a little longer — next thing you know, you’re burnt out and crying a river in the middle of the night with your best friend on a call. Been there, done that. It’s not a pretty road.

Give yourself a break. The fact that you’re going through a change is enough of a reason to be proud of yourself. You do not have to handle it perfectly, because there is no “right” way to do this. It is going to be messy, chaotic, and difficult — that’s why it’s a change, and that’s why it’s good.

Living life on autopilot is easy, but it won’t take you anywhere. Have the audacity to make the mess. Your 80% is waiting.

Originally published by the author at https://substack.com/.

Adulting Era | Avishi | Substack

Why Delusion and Audacity Are Your Best Growth Strategies was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

“Anxious woman in tech — who strives for excellence but is too stimulated to stick to a hobby” — written by me, about me, 1 year ago.

I’m looking at this quote at 1AM, thinking: God, how did I ever get time to stick to any hobby?. I made a 2026 vision board last month, and I am already tired of thinking about the empty promises I made with myself. Between a full-time job and a part-time master’s — I barely have the energy to socialize. How am I going to balance my life to realize these “side hustles” I’ve signed myself up for?

If you’re not a member yet, you can read the story here.

Myth of Work-Life Balance. Maybe that’s the problem: the futile effort to “balance”. Trying to balance my different personalities — the corporate baddie, the nerdy student, the reader, the ambivert, yada yada yada. Shaming myself for failing at being someone else instead of accepting the person I am. Starving myself of contentment with self for an ideal I keep changing.

“Maybe you don’t notice your progress because you’re always raising the bar.”

Adaptability is the key. Instead of glorifying the hustle culture, embrace the art of sitting with “what is” — making intentional choices based on what truly matters in the moment. It’s time to move from balance to adaptability. Unrealistic expectations from self was not the only source of my fatigue, I was not allowing myself to enjoy the moment. I kept thinking of the next thing I’m “supposed to do”.

Some weeks demand ambition. Others demand rest. Forcing balance only led to exhaustion. Why do I need to limit my work hours on days I don’t have plans to hang out? Work when there’s a family reunion? Reluctantly go for the team dinner when I’m exhausted? Now I’m adjusting different pieces of life as and when necessary. Life doesn’t move in equal parts, why should I?

Living without a checklist. There’s a fine line between high-passion engagement and exhaustion. The moment my back started hurting is my cue to close shop for the day. Still working on myself to ensure I stop before the pain starts, rather than using pain as the metric for amount of work done.

Ambition also needs an exit strategy to maintain sanity.

Hustle culture romanticizes doing everything alone. Robots work alone, humans need support — from people, systems, and ourselves. Friends who don’t take it personally when you go quiet. Workplaces that allow flexibility without guilt. Most importantly, self-support — allowing myself to rest without explanation.

Hustle culture brings burnout, harmony promotes reframing your ambition. Maybe the vision board isn’t about the “side hustles” for 2026. Maybe it’s learning how to live without a checklist at all.

Originally published by the author at https://substack.com/.

Adulting Era | Avishi | Substack

Why You Should Ditch Your Pursuit Of Work-Life “Balance” was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Why I walked away from my team, after 1.5+ years, a major promotion, and a big project milestone

Fueled by lofty aspirations and a hunger for growth — this should have been a good way to start the article. No filter? I was done. The environment no longer fit me. Work didn’t excite me. The future felt uncertain. I got my promotion, and I felt I squeezed the most out of my team. So I decided: it was time to move on.

Deciding to change teams was the easy part. Choosing which team? That’s where I got neurotic. TL;DR is that I broke my decision-making down into two parts: career growth and technical growth (overthinking with structure helps me tame my insanity).

Career Growth

📈🌱🎯: Role progression, skills, capabilities, impact, goals

How do you see your role in next 5, 10, 20 years?

(My reflection) I plan to stick with a SWE role long-term. Management? Not anytime soon. The goal is to grow into a senior technical lead.

Which field do you see yourself working in?

I liked backend work in IoT in my former team. Did it make my heart sing? Meh — not sure if that’s the field I want to stick with. I’d like to browse around before settling into a niche.

What kind of projects interest you?

I enjoy solving problems with open-ended implementation paths, where the outcome is clear, but the “how” is up for grabs. I love to figure out different approaches and comparing their user impact, cost, scale, latency, etc. I love cross-team collaboration — it’s chaotic, but somehow, that’s where I find my rhythm.

Technical Growth

🧠🛠️🤝: Expertise, skillset, problem-solving, learning, collaboration

What skills do you want to develop for your aspired role?

I’m staying with the tech track, but niche is TBD. My plan? Expand my skillset and get my hands dirty to find which field excites me the most.

What are your project expectations?

I want a project with uncertain implementation, clear expectations, and visible impact. The design shouldn’t be narrowed to specific needs, but something in infrastructure — where I can work on generic designs that can be scaled to specific use-cases.

Team Charter & Values

The team’s charter and values played a big role in helping me evaluate both my old and prospective teams. Even though new projects were coming in my former team, the work was still backend development in IoT. I had to be honest: did my team’s technical direction align with my aspirations? The answer was no.

Career growth helped me understand that I needed change; technical growth helped me figure out where that change should take me.

Stepping Out of Comfort Zone

Leaving a team is tough. I had incredible colleagues, meaningful work, and supportive leads. The bottom line was I was staying because it was comfortable, not because the future excited me.

Finding a new team was easier said than debugged. It felt like a full-time job. Nothing humbles you like pitching yourself in a company filled with brilliant minds. It’s a draining process — going through job descriptions with intimidating requirements and thinking “Okay but… what’s the catch?” Starting with my internal résumé helped me remember what I bring to the table — and gave me just enough confidence to begin phase two: messaging people and stalking about a billion teams (not in a creepy way, I assure you).

Starting again is cute until you realize there’s no Ctrl+Z here. But taking the risk only made me stronger by forcing me to introspect on my strengths, weaknesses, and motivations. In hindsight, what felt like chaos at that time was actually an important lesson in personal growth.

If you’ve made it this far, you’re probably thinking about making a change. So, here’s a simple question that helped me get started:

Do you still feel excited about your work (or did you ever)?

If not, maybe it’s time for your own chaotic growth journey. Grab a pen and coffee — you’ll need both :)

Stability Is Overrated: Adieu to My “Perfect” Team at Google was originally published in Code Like A Girl on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

I’m an anxious overthinker. At the *grand age* of 23, I have struggled with it for as long as I can remember. My mind is a whirlwind of “fixate until perfection or procrastinate until last moment.” It’s a ping-pong match between the two extremes, and it’s been overwhelming working in corporate (to say the least).

But after a year of swinging back-and-forth, I’ve developed a few ways to tame this thunderstorm in my head 🌪✋:

Never-ending Tasks

(Maintain a work list) I start off my day with a calming cup of tea to make email-reading bearable😮‍💨. While going through mail, I add, remove, and shuffle tasks according to shifting priorities (and bandwidth). This helps to set my priorities straight and know when to delegate or push back timelines.

Analysis Paralysis

(Track your progress) When I am working on a design, I find myself going down the rabbit hole of endless artifacts. I start with one doc, go to a reference doc, then another, and then three hours later, I have my browser begging me to close some tabs.

To stop myself from blowing away my sanity, I started writing down important info with references (mind you, not plagiarizing). This not only helps me select and discard info, but it also gives me a visual of what I’ve already gathered, so I can stop reading and start working for once.

Overwhelm and Distraction

(DNS: Focus time — Great way to avoid meetings) I’ve blocked off “Do Not Schedule” blocks on my calendar. With multiple projects, especially the ones that require extensive cross-team collaboration, I was drowning in the sea of meetings, messages, and email threads. I lost track of tasks and priorities. These no distraction blocks are usually when I code. They help me focus on just one thing at a time.

Handling Setbacks

(Talk it through) When something goes wrong, I go into panic mode, torturing myself thinking horrible scenarios. I tend to exaggerate situations (“exaggerate” doesn’t do justice to what goes inside my head). Discussing the situation with peers helps me snap back to reality. Things are almost never as bad as my mind makes them out to be. Discussions with peers bring in different perspectives with practical solutions. I am either left with reassurance or an actionable task that can help me get out of the spiral.

Burnout

(Breaks are important) I’m all for giving my best effort, but I’ve learned that knowing when to step away is just as important. I pushed myself too hard and it eventually took a toll — mentally and physically. I ended up taking a week off, catching the next flight to my hometown for some much-needed head massage from my mom.

Instead of pushing myself to the breaking point, I’ve learned to recognize when it’s time to pause. I’ve learned to draw a line between work and insanity. It’s hard to relax when work is piling up. So when the work gets overwhelming, I strictly adhere to my official working hours. Once the clock hits 5:30, laptop is closed, work notifications are off ⛔️. This pushes me to be productive during working hours and also ensures that I get a real break.

What difference does it make anyway? — My biggest takeaway from therapy sessions. When I start to panic, I pause and ask myself, “How will this situation affect me after a day, a week, or a year?” This helps me zoom out, regain perspective, and take control — rather than letting the situation take over. While the overthinking storm will likely never fully subside, these habits have made it easier for me to navigate. I continue working on my anxiety with the help of therapy, but these small practices have helped me gain control of an otherwise chaotic life (not that I’m complaining).

“Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” — Albert Einstein

An Anxious Person’s Corporate Survival Kit was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

This is neither a motivational story nor a to-do list. I don’t have any secret recipe and I have no plan of being modest in this article.

I started my FTE journey by hearing “Google is a company where people come to retire”. For a while, I embraced that mindset. If you’re still thinking I had a roadmap on Day 1, sorry to disappoint, never had one.

For weeks I told my team I am learning the tech stack (I had already used it in my internship before). In my defense, I was still learning — going through (unrelated) documentations, connecting with people, understanding and enjoying perks, etc.

The first bug that I was assigned had been pending for months 🫠. I worked on it for a month (or two) and eventually closed it. Fixing that bug is where it all started.

As luck would have it, a high priority and high visibility project came to the team shortly after. The designs that I worked on somehow ended up getting more complex than anticipated. This helped for the majority part — cross-team collaboration, high visibility, complex design, important launches, blah blah blah.

Again, never had a roadmap. Never could. I am too anxious of a person to stick to a roadmap. Or even come up with one. I would keep trying to perfectly plan every step that I would miss out on the task at hand. My approach is simple, give your best to the current task. That’s all I did and the rest followed.

Well, I did that and made connections (lot of connections). Having mentors at the start of my career gave a huge boost to my knowledge, skills, and confidence. I regularly discussed my work and progress with mentors to get feedback.

I started promo discussion with my manager roughly 4 months before the application date. It was not an “I want to get promoted ASAP” conversation, but a “What can I do to get there eventually” conversation.

I had solid code metrics, impactful projects, and strong peer feedbacks. Sure, I had my doubts before applying. I was skeptical if I’ll get promoted within ~1.5 years of joining. I didn’t have a grand plan, and there’s always uncertainty. This is not a motivational story but your sign to go for that promo :)

Shoot your shot, what’s the worst that can happen?

Shoot Your Shot: My No Plan Promotion Journey At Google was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

As I celebrate my first work anniversary at Google, I find myself reflecting on this journey and looking back at the lessons learned. This year has been a whirlwind of experiences, filled with exponential growth and lots of fun.

(Here’s the link to the full article if you’re not a Medium member.)

One of the highlights has undoubtedly been the people I’ve met and lost along the way. This year helped me grow personally and professionally in ways I never anticipated (or even wanted). This has been a year of firsts, including the unforgettable experience of breaking code in prod 😛

Someone recently asked me, “What excites you the most about working at Google?”. My answer was a no brainer. The impact.

When you deploy code and see the graphs rise up with the sheer number of users engaging with a feature YOU built, it is incredibly rewarding.

Of course, the culture and people are huge factors as well. The people at Google are amazing! I have met folks that go above and beyond to help others. Maybe because they are excited about technology but majorly because they are awesome. It’s amazing to be a part of this exciting community with infectious passion for science and technology.

I am constantly inspired by how people here are always looking for ways to grow. Not necessarily in a competitive-drag-you-down sort of way, but in a I-love-technology-what’s-next way. People have this shared passion for technology and a hunger to discover what’s next.

Step out of your comfort zone. My #1 learning is to always look for opportunities to grow and contribute — in tech and non-tech. This year, I hosted an event which was wayy out of my comfort zone. I have always been a person with crazy stage fright and now, the task of presenting my work to a big group does not seem like a I’ll-just-take-a-sick-leave kind of idea.

Plan. Execute. Achieve — learning #2. Earlier I was just focusing on tasks at hand without any goal to improve any particular skill. With help of mentors, I started setting goals for each quarter. This helped me quantify my growth and track my progress instead of aimlessly completing tickets.

This brings to learning #3 — personal board of directors. A personal board of directors could be your group of people that you can reach out to discuss any difficult situation. These people can be from varying aspects of life that give you fresh perspectives and help you see the bigger picture.

I found turning to a friend or mentor in a difficult situation equips me to deal in a better way. I often look at a situation with bias or exaggerate it in my head. My personal board of directors are people that inspire, motivate, and empower me — people I can rely on, even at my lowest. These people tell me what I need to hear instead of what I want to hear.

#4 Embrace the corporate chaos. I learned the hard way that there is a false sense of emergency in corporate.

As an anxious perfectionist, I used to panic because of timeline (pseudo) pressure. After a while, I learned to understand the actual deadlines. This came from setting estimates beforehand so that I can pushback when someone starts pushing for early deliverables.

It’s not bragging if it’s based on facts. #5 — Share your achievements.

Visibility is an important aspect of corporate. Make sure important stakeholders know about your work. There are different ways to gain visibility, choose the one that is healthy, friendly, and empathetic.

During my internships, I was meticulous in documenting my work and keeping track of tech discussions. After joining full-time, I slacked off. Perhaps the drive for a return offer fueled my aggressive documentation during internship. This is a to-do for me — #6 Document your work.

With multiple projects, you’re bound to slip on your contributions at work. Documenting contributions helps to ensure that you don’t overlook important achievements during performance review.

Before wrapping up this already longg article, I want to stress on how important it is to take care of your mental and physical wellbeing.

Somewhere between coaching classes and coding contests, I lost sight of the value of taking breaks for myself. But regardless of where you are in your life, taking a break is not a waste of time. Step away from perfectionism and live life at 80 percent.

My first year at Google has been memorable, to say the least. Success and failures are going to come and go, but the memories, learnings, and connections will go a long way.

This year, my greatest struggle was to pick up pieces of myself that I lost in the pursuit of career, and heal my inner child. In this seemingly cutthroat competitive world, try to be someone who is here to just enjoy the journey.

Thanks!

LinkedIn | Twitter

Breaking Code to Building Myself : Six learnings after a year @ corporate was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Outset: City Blues to Sense of Belonging

When it all began, I wasn’t a big fan of the new city. Moving to a new city brought its share of challenges and drama, but now that I have settled down, the city has started to grow on me. I think more than the city, I have started enjoying the independence and even the responsibilities that came with it. Exploring aspects of life other than work/ career became an important aspect of this transition. When you spend 8 hours (or more) at work, you start to value the remaining hours in a day more. The value for time and your attitude changes in a way that you start to relate more to your parents than your younger cousins — a shift that carries a tinge of nostalgia but is bound to happen in life.

Adapting and Transforming: Making a Home

For the longest time, I lacked the social energy and mental capacity to even step out of the house. It may sound silly but it took me months to even figure out what login/ logout time works for me. Setting up a flat by yourself is no easy feat either. Transforming the flat into a home became a quest — just for a small sense of belonging. I felt lost in the city. Struggling with adapting to new cultures, schedules, and priorities. It took a considerable amount of time, but finally I find myself at peace with this new life — well, sort of at peace with this.

Teaming and onboarding: Navigating Corporate Realities

Shifting focus to the corporate aspect, I want to emphasize that I am not trying to be political here. I genuinely love my team. The onboarding process was remarkably smooth, with my team guiding me through the technical and political ways of corporate life. Speaking of political, I learned the importance of being political at the workplace — drawing boundaries and watching your words to avoid unintended consequences.

Chai pe Charcha: Candid Conversations

Real glimpses of corporate culture came to me during tea breaks with colleagues. Candid and insightful conversations during these breaks provided practical takeaways, stimulating personal growth. The conventional view of corporate life is to finish the tasks at hand and go home. I found taking the additional step to find or make opportunities helped me explore more areas at work and figure out my interests. Taking time to understand how things really work and not just finding a solution to complete the tasks has helped me grow professionally. It helped me gain confidence about my work and come up with alternatives to problems at hand.

Year-End Revelation: Goals for Purposeful Growth

At the end (or during my year-end review), I understood the importance of setting goals and expectations, not just with your manager, but also with myself. Aimlessly ticking off tasks makes it difficult to quantify impact, growth, and achievements. Setting clear goals or just identifying areas of improvement helped me give my work a sense of purpose, guiding my professional journey in a more meaningful direction.

Epilogue: Seeking Support & Acknowledging Personal Growth

What helped me through difficult times was knowing that I am not alone. Every fresh grad was going through a similar journey, if not worse. In the pursuit of understanding myself, I ended up on the doorstep of therapy. The list of goals that earlier only included milestones for a successful career now includes additions like “building emotional resilience” and “escaping escapism”. I will continue hustling in my professional life as before, with the new acknowledgment that I need to work on myself too.

“Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths.”

Feel free to reach out to me on LinkedIn :)

Navigating the Transition: A Fresh Grad’s Reflections on the College to Corporate Move was originally published in Women in Technology on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

I completed my first internship a few weeks ago, and this is an account of my learning. I was a software intern at Google this summer. It was both fun and enlightening, and it was definitely more than what I expected. More fun, more enlightening, more overwhelming, more caring.

About my internship

I interned with a front-end team in Google Cloud; built user experience for a Backup and Disaster Recovery solution. My internship started by getting familiar with technologies, then I dove into my project, concluding with a presentation.

I’d be lying if I said technical work was the highlight. We (interns) had lots of fun, interactive, wholesome sessions!

During the internship, we had plenty of opportunities to grow professionally and personally.

My reflections

Keeping manager in the loop

You might be wondering, “I already knew that.” I’m adding this to my list anyhow because it’s REALLY important.

Whatever you do, be it a successful attempt or an unsuccessful one, share it with your manager. They should be aware of the fact that you put effort into something. No one expects you to know everything; it’s okay if it’s taking some time or if you are unable to figure something.

Share your problems

If you’re not already familiar with Imposter Syndrome, I urge you to read about it. It is okay to ask questions from your manager and share your problems. Just attempt to figure it yourself first. If you still have doubts, just ask them.

If I was unable to figure something, I used to ask the question from my manager, telling them how I approached it and the links I referred to.

Documentation

Document everything! I mean it. Your work, thought process, challenges, learning, approaches — EVERYTHING. Believe me, it really helps.

I used to maintain weekly logs, in which I briefly wrote what I worked on, sometimes random notes, the links I referred to, etc. It helped me track my progress and share my work at the end for a returning offer.

Prepare agenda for meetings

Be it daily, weekly, or monthly meetings — write down the points you want to discuss beforehand. Don’t make mental notes; you won’t remember everything.

I maintained a doc for this — things I want to give updates on, things I want to ask, and things that are pending.

Taking the first STEP

Don’t be afraid to break the ice or to take the initiative. In fact, it is encouraged; it displays leadership skills. Reach out to new people. Network as much as you can — you’ll learn amazing things from various people.

Bonus Tip: Work on your introduction before your first day. You will have to introduce yourself in every meeting, and you don’t want to try to remember your hobbies on the spot :D

I don’t have cool office pics for you because of WFH :( But I do have pics of cool schwag-

P.S. — Check out my article on interview preparation here.

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