Rain tapped against the window in a rhythm that felt louder than it should. I sat curled in the corner, a mug of half-cooled coffee in my hands, scrolling through my phone. Mostly doomscrolling, if I’m honest.

One by one, I skimmed through comments on recent posts. Most were harmless. A few were kind. But then my eyes snagged on a sentence that felt heavier than all the rest. It wasn’t the first mean comment I’ve ever received. And it won’t be the last.

We live in a world where people feel free to say whatever they want about you, especially when they can hide behind a screen. Most of the time, I brush it off. I remind myself I’ve done the work. That I know who I am. That I don’t need strangers to validate me.

But this one was different. It found me in a vulnerable moment. I was tired, stretched thin and less centered than usual.

And in that split second, the words sank deep. They pulled me straight back into old wounds, old stories, old insecurities I thought I’d buried.

That’s how triggers work. They don’t knock politely at the door. They break it open. And they don’t care how “tough” you are.

My chest tightened. My jaw locked. The words rippled outward, stirring something I thought I had buried years ago.

I kept scrolling, pretending I wasn’t bothered, but my body told the truth. My pulse quickened. My mind spun. My coffee went cold in my hands as the comment replayed on loop.

And in that quiet room, with nothing but rain for company, I realized that this wasn’t about the comment at all.

It was about me.

About all the times I had believed I needed to be enough. Thought I had to be seen to be loved. And about the loneliness that said told me maybe I’m still not.

I walked across the carpet, tracing the familiar pattern with my eyes, trying to ground myself. I could taste the sharp tang of guilt, the acrid sting of inadequacy. And beneath it all, a deeper ache, one I recognized but had hoped was gone.

When the Shadow Whispers

Carl Jung said: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

Eckhart Tolle names this the pain-body, an accumulation of unresolved hurt waiting for a match to flare.

Rumi poetically reframes the sting as something tender: “The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”

What if that tiny fracture in my chest was not evidence of brokenness, but the crack through which something greater might emerge?

Into the Wound

Let me tell you about how triggers feel.

Imagine you’re walking through a dim forest. The path is familiar, the air cool, earthy. You’re steady, present. Suddenly, you step into a patch of quicksand. It’s not deep at first, but you’re sinking. Little by little, panic seeps in.

That’s what a trigger does. It drags you into the past, into stories you told yourself a thousand times: I’m not enough. I’m unlovable. I won’t be held. You reel, trying to escape. But the harder you struggle, the deeper you sink.

Traditionally, we fall into three scripts: fight, flight, or freeze. We lash out, we avoid, or we collapse inside. In that moment by the window, I wanted to do all three.

But instead, as my heart slowed, against my instincts, I paused. I named it: This is shame. I pressed my hand to my chest, as if comforting a child. And I whispered, quiet, shaky, but true “Thank you”.

It felt absurd. Pain doesn’t feel like gratitude. But in that trembling moment, I understood the trigger wasn’t cruelty. It was a calling.

A Practice Born from Pain

Since then, I’ve woven a ritual into the broken parts of my day. When the hurt arrives:

1. Pause. I stop rushing. I breathe into the tightness. I give myself space to feel.
2. Name it. “This is shame. This is longing. This is fear of rejection.”
3. Trace it. I ask, “Where have I felt this before?” More often than not, it’s childhood. It’s old rejections, repeated stories, unspoken needs.
4. Thank it. “Thank you for showing me what still needs healing.” It’s not denial. It’s wisdom acknowledging its own wounds.
5. Choose again. I respond with softness where I once reacted with armor. I speak softly. I set boundaries kindly. I breathe through the grief.

Nothing transforms overnight. But over time, the wound softens. The pain becomes wisdom, the ache becomes awareness. The quicksand loosens its grip.

A Lotus Grows in Mud

There’s a Buddhist metaphor that teaches us that the lotus grows from the mud yet blooms unafraid. Its beauty is inseparable from the murk. Without the mud, there is no bloom.

In my life, the triggers are the mud. The bruises, the voices of fear, the stories I whispered in darkness. And my healing, the flowering of self-compassion, clarity, and peace, only happens when I lean into the mud, instead of running from it.

Triggers don’t mean we’re broken. They mean there’s more to heal. They’re not punishments. They’re invitations to softness, to truth, to reclamation.

A New Relationship with Pain

I will never outgrow triggers. Nor should I. To be human is to carry wounds. But what I’m learning is that I can change my relationship to them.

I’ve stopped fighting the cracks in myself. Instead, I kneel before them. I press my palm into the rough edges. I see the child behind the hurt, still needing love.

I breathe into the tear. Because that’s where light gets in.

So if you feel triggered, tonight, tomorrow morning, in a room where the silence grows teeth, don’t hide from it. Stay. Sit. And ask:

“What is this pain trying to teach me?”

Let the quiet answer. Let your breath be the bridge. Let the pain be the portal.

Because beneath the ache is your teacher. And through the crack, your healing begins.

Why I Thank the Universe Every Time I’m Triggered was originally published in Better Humans on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Experimented with the new GPT Builder to create a GPT this week and had to share a few reflections and observations.

I can always tell when people use ChatGPT to generate content (unless they use special prompting, which is rare). So, I wanted to see if it was possible to develop a GPT that effectively mirrors someone’s personal style of communication, using publicly available data like publications, blogs, social media, and other information.

I was floored by how quickly I was able to turn an idea into a functional solution using only natural language. This is both fascinating and dangerous at the same time.

It’s fascinating because despite few initial limitations (some of which I have listed below), it’s clear that AI is revolutionizing how we approach problem-solving and software development. We are entering a world where ideas can be brought into reality very quickly, within hours or days — opening up limitless possibilities.

Blurring the lines

However, the line between useful and dangerous can blur quickly and I don’t know if we know where that line is yet.

On one hand, this technology can be extremely useful — imagine having your own “mini-me” that can essentially sound and talk like you — from responding to emails, to even engaging in social media interactions on your behalf. This could revolutionize the way we manage our digital lives, offering unprecedented levels of productivity.

On the other, however, just imagine how powerful this capability would be for attackers in carrying out human-exploitable attacks— such as social engineering, phishing, identity theft, impersonation, misinformation and more.

On a more philosophical front, I also can't help but wonder — as we start relying on AI to communicate for us, what does that mean for our own social skills and emotional intelligence over time? Will we become more detached from our own interactions, relying on AI to maintain our personal relationships and professional networks? Will it make us lose sight of the importance of nurturing our basic human qualities, such as empathy, creativity, and critical thinking?

Will it make us lose sight of the importance of nurturing our basic human qualities, such as empathy, creativity, and critical thinking?

Only time will tell, but in the meantime, there is a clear call to action: we ALL must navigate this new AI-powered world with a deep sense of responsibility and foresight.

Understanding AI is everyone’s job

Establishing robust guidelines for responsible use of AI, particularly in areas that intersect closely with personal identity and privacy, is an obvious need. However, as the lines between useful and dangerous get more and more blurred, we need to acknowledge that responsible AI use is not just a big tech problem — it’s everyone’s responsibility.

Whether your job has anything to do with technology or not, you should be informed about how AI works, its potential risks, and how to recognize and protect yourself against AI-generated malicious interactions.

In a broader sense, this collective responsibility means fostering a culture of open dialogue and critical thinking about AI. It involves creating spaces where we can express concerns, share insights, and collaboratively develop solutions that advocate for and promote responsible AI.

This shared accountability is key to preventing misuse and ensuring that AI remains a tool for innovation rather than a weapon for exploitation.

Key takeaways from my experience with GPT Builder

Now I am done ranting about the broader implications that come with creating our own AI doppelgängers, I’ll briefly reflect on the key takeaways from using the GPT Builder pilot.

1. User-Initiated Interactions: One of the primary limitations is that it requires user initiation to work. The GPT Builder won’t let you configure it to send messages on its own; it only responds to user prompts, even if it’s just a single letter or a word. This hinders your ability to offer quality upfront engagement and set expectations with the user.
2. Dynamic Response Generation: The AI is designed to generate responses dynamically, based on learned patterns. This means it doesn’t hard-code text, emulating human-like behavior. However, this can also lead to unpredictability, particularly in situations where precise consistency is required.
3. Security: During testing, I discovered that unless specifically configured, the model could inadvertently leak its configuration settings in response to general queries. This is a crucial security concern, though it’s likely to be addressed by the time you are reading this.
4. Rapid Idea Realization: One of the most impressive aspects was the speed at which I could turn an idea into a functioning AI model. It will also brainstorm ideas with you, which significantly accelerates the problem-solving and creativity processes.
5. AI’s Limitations and Potential: Despite these initial limitations, it’s clear that AI and GPT-based technologies are set to transform how we approach software development. While traditional approaches will retain their relevance for now, the agility and innovation that AI brings can be absolutely game-changing in every aspect of technology as we know it.

If there is one key takeaway from this blog post it’s that the future of AI is not just something that will happen to us; it is something we are actively and collectively shaping every day, with every new idea, every ethical decision, and every conversation about what it means to use this technology responsibly.

As we embark on this era of unparalleled innovation and unchartered challenges, let’s walk with both excitement and collective accountability. Using AI prudently and understanding the risks that come with it are everyone’s job.

Follow Eva on Medium for more thought-provoking articles on self-improvement, future of AI, cybersecurity, women empowerment, and more.

Disclaimer: All opinions and experiences shared in this article are my own and do not represent the views of my employer.

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AI Doppelgängers: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly was originally published in AI Mind on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.