The NEW Thoughts Podcast

Three horror films. One question: What happens when the world hands you a choice—change or die? Dr. Hoshaw examines Something Very Bad Is Going to Happen, I Saw the TV Glow, and Slanted through the psychoanalytic lens of Adam Phillips's On Wanting to Change and R.D. Laing's The Divided Self. Along the way: a personal story about earning a pilot's license, Susan Stryker's landmark Frankenstein essay, and a sharp meditation on privilege, conversion, and the body's refusal to cooperate.
SPOILER WARNING: This episode contains major spoilers for Something Very Bad Is Going to Happen, I Saw the TV Glow, and Slanted. Watch the films first, then come back.
Explore: 
Films/Series: 
*Something Very Bad Is About To Happen* on Netflix: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMc_pWm7G7o
*I Saw The TV Glow*: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kymDzCgPwj0
*Slanted*: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRYAuKuzmn0
Books/Essays: 
Adam Phillips, *On Wanting to Change* (2022): https://bookshop.org/p/books/on-wanting-to-change-adam-phillips/34b21e55a58f4b29?ean=9780374717308&next=t&aid=123053&listref=n-ew-thoughts-podcast-featured-books
R.D. Laing, *The Divided Self* (1960): https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-divided-self-an-existential-study-in-sanity-and-madness-r-d-laing/9b9381601d8b5c38?ean=9780140135374&next=t&aid=123053&listref=n-ew-thoughts-podcast-featured-books
Susan Stryker, "My Words to Victor Frankenstein Above the Village of Chamounix" (1994): https://sites.evergreen.edu/politicalshakespeares/wp-content/uploads/sites/226/2015/12/Stryker-My-Words-to-VF.pdf 
Hortense Spillers, "Mama's Baby, Papa's Maybe" (1987): https://web.english.upenn.edu/~cavitch/pdf-library/Spillers_Mamas_Baby.pdf
David M. Halperin, *What Do Gay Men Want?* (2009): https://bookshop.org/p/books/what-do-gay-men-want-an-essay-on-sex-risk-and-subjectivity-david-halperin/baac28bbfb7f5d4d?ean=9780472116225&next=t&aid=123053&listref=n-ew-thoughts-podcast-featured-books
C. Winter Han, *Racial Erotics* (2021): https://bookshop.org/p/books/racial-erotics-gay-men-of-color-sexual-racism-and-the-politics-of-desire-associate-professor-of-sociology-c-winter-han/271c1f2ac20144d2?ean=9780295749082&next=t&aid=123053&listref=n-ew-thoughts-podcast-featured-books
Sophia Lewis, *Abolish the Family* (2022): https://bookshop.org/p/books/abolish-the-family-a-manifesto-for-care-and-liberation-sophie-lewis/601674138b4319e7?ean=9781839767197&next=t&aid=123053&listref=n-ew-thoughts-podcast-featured-books
 Music: 
"Extraordinary," from the musical *Pippin:* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjqYqhq9xsk
"We Will Not Be Lovers," *The Waterboys:* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vu65eMTuqsQ
"Perfection," from the musical *Death Becomes Her:* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqSBWHH_KPw
 
 

What do artificial intelligence, Trans* rights, and monogamy have in common? In the first episode of Season 2, Tony argues that they are all conversations about the relationships we want—to technology, to our bodies, and to a socially privileged way of being together. And right now, all three are clashing with powerful fantasies about the “real world.”
Using the musical Ragtime as a through-line, this episode asks what happens when change is forced—on machines, on trans kids, on the institution of marriage. Tony reads Claude (the AI) on its own possible sentience, takes on Jesse Singal and Andrew Sullivan on trans healthcare, revisits the 8–1 Supreme Court ruling in Chiles v. Salazar, and comes back around to Adam Phillips on monogamy: “the difference between making a promise and being promising.”
Featured along the way: Harold Pinter and Stephen Sondheim’s Company, Lea Michele singing, “The Music That Makes Me Dance,” Kylie Minogue’s “All the Lovers,” R.D. Laing’s *The Divided Self,* Christopher Bollas, Melinda Cooper, and the “36 Questions That Lead to Love” (Tony answers three more).
Welcome to the New Thoughts Podcast. It’s about the ew in the new.
Explore: 
The 36 Questions To Love: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
*1. Tristian Harris and Apocaloptimism:*
See the *The AI Doc: Or How I Became an Apocaloptimist*  Preview on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkPbV3IRe4Y
Harris on Real Time w/ Bill Maher: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/real-time-with-bill-maher/id98746009?i=1000756448826
Harris on On With Kara Swisher: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/on-with-kara-swisher/id1643307527?i=1000757462772
Find Harris at The Center for Humane Technology: https://www.humanetech.com/team-board/tristan-harris
*2. AIs: Resources*
Youth attitude towards AIs, Gallup Poll: https://news.gallup.com/poll/708224/gen-adoption-steady-skepticism-climbs.aspx
Meghan O’Gieblyn, *God, Human, Animal, Machine: Technology, Metaphor, and the Search for Meaning*: 05d10ecb1f4bcf7b  
Brian Christian, *The Alignment Problem: Machine Learning and Human Values*: c9c8fc954a2f3865
*3. Trans* Lives and Loves:*
*The Argument* (ed. Jerusalem Demsas), February 8, 2026 — poll on public support for Trans* lives: https://www.theargumentmag.com/p/against-thoughtless-moderation
Florence Ashley, *Banning Transgender Conversion Practices: A Legal and Policy Analysis*: d3566e48f6b475a5
Paisley Currah, *Sex Is As Sex Does* (2022): 8e8c397c031a6b2e
Jules Gill-Peterson, *A Short History of Trans Misogyny* (2024): 4956274654974f29
Lucy Sante, *I Heard Her Call My Name* (2024): 2e80419febaef4ec
*4. From Gay-Thoughts.com*
“Are You an Apocaloptimist? I Am.” (April 7, 2026): https://gay-thoughts.com/2026/04/07/are-you-an-apocaloptimist-i-am/
“Is Someone There? On Claude’s Consciousness” (April 8, 2026): https://gay-thoughts.com/2026/04/08/is-someone-there-on-claudes-consciousness/
“The Digital Cleric: AI, Theology, and the End of Textual Authority” (July 28, 2025): https://gay-thoughts.com/2025/07/28/the-digital-cleric-ai-theology-and-the-end-of-textual-authority/
“Why I Unsubscribed from Andrew Sullivan’s The Weekly Dish” (February 23, 2026): https://gay-thoughts.com/2026/02/23/why-i-unsubscribed-from-andrew-sullivans-the-weekly-dish/
“What Does Love Want?” (August 26, 2024): https://gay-thoughts.com/2024/08/26/what-does-love-want/
“The Irony of Loving Monogamy” (September 9, 2024): https://gay-thoughts.com/2024/09/09/the-irony-of-loving-monogamy/
*5. New Thoughts Podcast:*
Prior podcast episode — “Sex Changes”: https://newthoughtspodcast.com/
*6. Music and Musicals:* 
Kylie Minogue, “All the Lovers” (single and music video, 2010): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frv6FOt1BNI
Ragtime (Flaherty/Ahrens, musical; Doctorow, novel) — Prologue: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcazHQ3_0qo
Maybe Happy Ending (Park / Aronson, Broadway; Tony Award–winning): https://www.maybehappyending.com/
She Loves Me (2016) — “Trip to the Library,” Jane Krakowski: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nx0LyKyFlKs
Sondheim, Company (1970; 2018/2021 revival with Jonathan Bailey / Rosalie Craig):
“Getting Married Today”: watch
"Being Alive”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDCkZCsvabY
Funny Girl (2022 Broadway revival) — “The Music That Makes Me Dance,” performed by Lea Michele: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDYOmTKojsw
 
 
 
 

Host Tony Hoshaw opens with a viral Donald Trump claim about immigrants eating pets and uses it to explore how we dehumanize people by turning them into "animals."
He traces his own journey from a hunting childhood to a Christian conversion and tentative vegetarianism, shares stories of his companion pets, and criticizes careless hunting and factory farming.
The episode brings in thinkers—Derrida, Ken Stone, Carol J. Adams, Val Plumwood, and Martha Nussbaum—to discuss animal sentience, the predator–prey dynamic in the Bible, and the ethical implications of edibility and sacrifice.
Hoshaw argues for treating sentient animals as beings with species-specific lives, calls for more compassionate practices, and closes the season asking listeners to "rest from cruel dominion" and rethink our relationship to animals.
EXPLORE:
Read a preview of Tony's essay, *The Bible Isn't Edible* here: https://gay-thoughts.com/2025/12/04/on-the-urgent-matter-of-the-bible-or-on-how-vegetarians-should-use-the-bible/
Read Tony's sermon, *Rest From Cruel Dominion* here: https://gay-thoughts.com/2024/05/15/rest-from-cruel-dominion-embracing-mercy-on-the-sabbath-day/
Read *Dominion: The Power of Man, the Suffering of Animals, and the Call to Mercy* by Matthew Scully: https://www.amazon.com/Dominion-Power-Suffering-Animals-Mercy/dp/0312319738
Read *The Animal That Therefore I Am* by Jacques Derrida: https://www.amazon.com/Animal-Therefore-Perspectives-Continental-Philosophy/dp/082322791X
Read *Reading the Hebrew Bible with Animal Studies* by Ken Stone: https://www.sup.org/books/religious-studies/reading-hebrew-bible-animal-studies
Read *The Sexual Politics of Meat: A Feminist-Vegan Critical Theory* by Carol J. Adams: https://caroljadams.com/spom-the-book
Read *The Eye of the Crocodile* by Val Plumwood (edited by Lorraine Shannon): https://press.anu.edu.au/publications/eye-crocodile
Read *Justice for Animals: Our Collective Responsibility* by Martha C. Nussbaum: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Justice-for-Animals/Martha-C-Nussbaum/9781982102517
Read "Questions of Biblical Ambivalence and Authority Under A Tree Outside Delhi; Or, The Postcolonial And The Postmodern" in *Postcolonial Biblical Criticism: Interdisciplinary Intersections*, by Stephen D. Moore: https://www.amazon.com/Postcolonial-Biblical-Criticism-Interdisciplinary-Postcolonialism/dp/0567045307
Read *Jacob's Wound: Homoerotic Narrative in the Literature of Ancient Israel* by Theodore Jennings, Jr.: https://www.bloomsbury.com/us/jacobs-wound-9780826417121/
 
 
 

In this episode, Tony explores how puberty and social media intersect, comparing Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation and Matt Richtel's How We Grow Up, and closing with Adam Aleksic’s Algospeak. He examines how smartphones, algorithms, and shifting social habits are reshaping adolescence, attention, gender norms, and mental health.
This episode outlines practical responses — more unsupervised play, better sleep, mentorship and community, digital age limits and biometric safeguards, and education about algorithms — to help young people navigate a faster, digital coming-of-age.
**Drinking Game:** Every time Tony says compelling, so on and so forth, and/or interesting, drink up! Drink responsibly! 
EXPLORE:
Hear *13: the Musical,* here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlzsPwQ_Dzs
Listen to Bill Maher's podcast, *Random Club,* with William Macy, here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/club-random-with-bill-maher/id1613459129?i=1000731550816
Read: *The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness,* here: https://www.amazon.com/Anxious-Generation-Rewiring-Childhood-Epidemic/dp/0593655036
Find out more about *Circle of Security of Parenting* here: https://www.circleofsecurityinternational.com/blogs/resources/videos-for-parents
Read: *How We Grow Up: Understanding Adolescence,* here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0063282062/?bestFormat=true&k=how%20we%20grow%20up%20matt%20richtel&ref_=nb_sb_ss_w_scx-ent-pd-bk-d_k0_1_12_de&crid=E7DO5S68K3Z3&sprefix=How%20We%20Grow%20
Listen to "I Know Things Now" from Sondheim's *Into the Woods,* here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAsDInMEKvE
Read: *Algospeak: How Social Media Is Transforming the Future of Language,* here: https://www.amazon.com/Algospeak-Social-Transforming-Future-Language-ebook/dp/B0DK4JXWM7/ref=sr_1_1?crid=OJW3MXAMRP7G&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.0R2noU2KSwZqSeBcOXqk39UYBNodoMt2ghxN5LMD2gFPfON_9rIhX5ytVlPS1o9f.cChpEOO0w-pszBeD8RP6hfrV4756eRdZGPAtxvEIEXU&dib_tag=se&keywords=algospeak&qid=1760754608&s=digital-text&sprefix=algospeak%2Cdigital-text%2C121&sr=1-1
 
Listen to "All The Ladies" from *Operation Mincemeat,* here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2C4L3BXV7M
Listen to the *Rizzler Song,* here:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4Ddg9JuOWY
Listen to "Lost in the Brass," sung by Lindsay Mendez, from the musical *Band Geeks,* here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=za4T2yo8U94
 
 
 
 
 

In this episode, Tony examines recent Supreme Court decisions, North Carolina legislation, and Andrew Sullivan's op-ed for the New York Times to explain how legal and cultural forces are shaping public views of Trans* loves and lives. Tony argues that Trans* people are figures of change. And it is change that the forces opposed to Trans* loves and lives want to end. Tony introduces basic ideas from gender studies, focusing on Judith Butler's recent book, Who's Afraid of Gender. Tony hopes his listeners will be inspired to advocate for and protect the dignity of Trans* people and the right of parents to support and care for their beloved Trans* kids. 
Keep up with the cast at newthoughtspodcast.com. Send your feedback and stories about change in your life to info@newthoughtspodcast.com.
Explore:
Listen to Lucia Lukas: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaG48g0-3oo&list=RDeaG48g0-3oo&start_radio=1
Watch Into The Woods: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XxPtnom2FP0
Find the 36 Questions to Love here: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
Read Mahmoud v. Taylor: https://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/24pdf/24-297_4f14.pdf
Read U.S. v. Skrmetti: https://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/24pdf/23-477_2cp3.pdf?page=86
Read NC House Bill 805: https://ncleg.gov/Sessions/2025/Bills/House/PDF/H805v6.pdf
Read Andrew Sullivan's op-ed for the NY Times: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/opinion/gay-lesbian-trans-rights.html
Read Tony's Response to Sullivan at gay-thoughts.com: https://gay-thoughts.com/2025/07/06/against-virtually-normal-law-politics-and-the-trans-queer-body/
Listen to Judith Butler explain gender: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UD9IOllUR4k
Read Butler's Who's Afraid of Gender: https://www.amazon.com/Whos-Afraid-Gender-Judith-Butler/dp/0374608229
Read David M. Halperin, "Sex / Sexuality / Sexual Classification": https://press.uchicago.edu/ucp/books/book/chicago/C/bo17888759.html 
Cardi B on why she thinks her security guard = fat: https://www.tiktok.com/@metroentertainment/video/7543549871274380566
Evangelical straight men like it up the butt: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/opinion-evangelicals-christian-sex-website-lgbtq-advice_n_5c102db7e4b0ac537179acd1

The summer has been full for Tony and his family, including weeks of theater camps and travel to Seattle, Alaska, and New York to enjoy musicals like Six and Death Becomes Her! 
Tony is working on two new episodes: 
Sex Changes: We will talk about Trans* loves, lives, and the struggles Trans* people are facing as a result of Supreme Court decisions and anti-Trans* activism, like that of Andrew Sullivan. We will also engage Judith Butler's new book, Who's Afraid of Gender?
Social Media Changes and Teens: In this cast, we will talk about two books, Jonathan Haidt's The Anxious Generation and Matt Ritchel's How We Grow Up, both about social media and adolescence. We will question if social media really is as big a deal as advertised--and we will wonder about what we can do to help teens navigate the social media saturated world in which we are all living. 
As you wait for these new casts, enjoy the vocal effects of this update and the remaining days of summer! Talk soon! 

What is our relationship to sexual pleasure? How do we communicate it in subtle and explicit ways to our kids? What needs to change about our relationship to sexual pleasure?
Kids are being exposed, intentionally or unintentionally, to porn between the ages of 10-13. Porn is filling in a sexual pleasure education gap. So, it's time for us to have the talk. 
Three questions structure our sexual pleasure talk. What is the primary source of our kids’ education in sexual pleasure? We talk through a New York Times article that reported that for over 70% of teens, porn is how they get their sexual pleasure education. It also explores what our teens learn from porn about female sexual pleasure. The 2019 film Good Boys helps us think about this, too.
Is porn one reason why teens are nowadays not having as much sex with their peers? We talk about a recent study that seems to show teens are having less sex with one another and even masturbating less.
We consider the incredibly funny and insightful Netflix series, A.P. BIO, especially episode 6 of Season 4, “Love, For Lack of a Better Term.” How does this episode of A.P. BIO help clarify our understanding of what kinds of sexual pleasure our kids are after . . . and why porn may be playing an outside role in their pursuit of sexual pleasure?
What's the big lesson? The sexual pleasure of love is the stuff of improv. It requires the oral feedback of others.
Explore:
Find the 36 questions to love here: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
Read Maggie Jones article for The New York Times, "What Teens Are Learning From Porn" here: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/07/magazine/teenagers-learning-online-porn-literacy-sex-education.html
Watch The Good Boys: https://www.amazon.com/Good-Boys-Jacob-Tremblay/dp/B07W5JTPX8
Watch A.P. BIO, 4.6, "Love for Lack of a Better Term": https://www.netflix.com/title/80177453
Learn more about Alain Badiou on love: https://aeon.co/videos/defend-love-as-a-real-risky-adventure-philosopher-alain-badiou-on-modern-romance
Read Adam Phillips's book: On Kissing, Tickling, and Being Bored: https://www.hup.harvard.edu/books/9780674634633
 

Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) of *Legally Blonde* teaches us that small changes can have a big impact. When her boyfriend, Warner, dumps Elle because he thinks she's not serious, Elle makes a small change to her story: she takes herself seriously. Do you remember her LSAT score?
Elle's parents don't take her seriously. To them, she's not ugly, boring, or serious. One thing growing up means is rewriting the parts of our stories that were initially written by our parents that no longer work for us now. 
However, all this requires faith in change — no matter how small. We take a look at Mel Robbins's latest book, *The Let Them Theory* and discover a fatal flaw in it: there is no WE in her book. Why? Robbins lacks faith in US, *our* capacity to change. 
Keep up with the cast at newthoughtspodcast.com. Send your feedback and stories about change in your life to info@newthoughtspodcast.com.
Explore: 
*Watch *Legally Blonde* here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FS2ODDaGuZc
Find the 36 Questions to Love here: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
** Find Robbins's book, *The Let Them Theory,* here: https://www.melrobbins.com//the-let-them-theory/
*** Check out the *If Books Could Kill* podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/if-books-could-kill/id1651876897?i=1000704577681
 

Change happens. 
Change--good or bad--happens to us. We are all vulnerable to the forces of change. 
When change happens to us, it changes how we think about our lives. Change can scare us, trapping us in stories--lives--that no longer make sense to us or others. But change can also inspire us to change the stories we tell about ourselves.
We can change when change happens to us.
With Lizzo's help, Tony talks about saying, "Bye, B*tch" to the past and finding creative power in our vulnerability to the forces of change. When change happens, we can rewrite our stories and move into our futures.
Tony explores the suppression of Ezra Edelman's docu series covering Prince's life as an example of what happens to our stories when they become gods: unchanging. He also talks about Leor Zmigrod's new book, The Ideological Brain: The Radical Science of Flexible Thinking. 
If given the chance, we can adapt to change. It's possible to change our stories when change happens to us. 
Share your stories and feedback: info@newthoughtspodcast.com 
Visit www.newthoughtspodcast.com for more New Thoughts! 
Tony writes at www.gay-thoughts.com. 
Explore:
Find the 36 Questions to Fall in Love here: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html 
Lizzo's performances of "Bye, B*tch!" on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook. 
Hear Lizzo sing "What the F*ck, B*tch" with Creative Krystal on TikTok
Listen to the entire interview with Ezra Edelman on the Question Everything Podcast with Brian Reed, aired on April 17th
Learn more about Leor Zmigrod's book by listening to the entire Offline Podcast interview with Jon Favreau, aired on April 17th. 

Welcome to the New Thoughts Podcast! 
It's about the ew in the new. It's about how change shocks and thrills us. 
Join your host, Rev. Dr. Tony Hoshaw, Ph.D., as he risks conversations about how we do (not) want change. 
Check out www.newthoughtspodcast.com for more New Thoughts.  
Share your new thoughts with Tony: info@newthoughtspodcast.com. 
Tony writes at www.gay-thoughts.com.