I know there are certain things I wanted to write about. I even had the thought, "I should write this tonight," but... I've forgotten what it is about, darn it. I recall as much that one of the things I want to write about has something to do with cars, or driving. Just what did I want to write about?
I've been so lazy lately, I haven't ran for 2 weeks now. It comes and goes with my mood, you see. I've done as much as bringing my gym bag to work so I'll see it and remember to get changed before going home, so that, I can go for a run, but then I think... nah... I do have one virtual run lined up for March, and the thing in Geongju, South Korea in April... oh I did register for the Shanghai Marathon but I didn't manage to get drawn in the lot.
So we finally had that birthday lunch. Coming to think of it, my cousin hasn't paid me yet. huh. I'll have to double check. My Aunt said she wanted to invite her friend (someone that I didn't know either) and that she's more than happy to pay for the guy. I wouldn't have minded any way but I didn't know if cousin wanted to bear the cost. In any case, Aunt hasn't paid back either.
So I know we're eligible for an annual bonus thingamajig and I've been in the lookout for a new travel backpack. I do have one currently, but I think it's too big; for my trip to Geongju, it's on a budgt airline. I paid for check in luggage, but did not pay for a hand-carry, but it did say one free personal item (handbag or something)... my current backpack is a little too big. Found this interesting looking one, but I still want to see the actual item before buying. It costs a bit of a pretty penny (for a backpack) so it will be a little gift for myself from the bonus.
A couple months back, when the visiting artist was in town doing supervision work at the workshop I go to, I saw her very pretty apron and asked her where she got it. She said it's from The Walking Apron. I looked it up and oooh, it costs a pretty penny too, but it gives very good coverage. After much ruminating, I got one for myself and am going to gift one to my bestie. I also used an iron patch and ironed a racoon peaking out from the pocket. That's because she has been buying clothes from a particular website that has cute racoons in the design. I also got one for myself and put a cat there (to denote "Kat").
We went hunting for good naan bread (I still can't forget the good naan I had in Japan)... still doesn't compare to the one I had in Japan. But, Justindia is pretty good. I think taste-wise it's better than Woodlands. I find Woodlands too herb-y and spice-y.
Still bringing Frankie out to Coloane once in a while. The most recent time, there were some wild dogs and again for unknown reasons, Frankie didn't bother with them. I wonder why.
I've been so lazy lately, I haven't ran for 2 weeks now. It comes and goes with my mood, you see. I've done as much as bringing my gym bag to work so I'll see it and remember to get changed before going home, so that, I can go for a run, but then I think... nah... I do have one virtual run lined up for March, and the thing in Geongju, South Korea in April... oh I did register for the Shanghai Marathon but I didn't manage to get drawn in the lot.
So we finally had that birthday lunch. Coming to think of it, my cousin hasn't paid me yet. huh. I'll have to double check. My Aunt said she wanted to invite her friend (someone that I didn't know either) and that she's more than happy to pay for the guy. I wouldn't have minded any way but I didn't know if cousin wanted to bear the cost. In any case, Aunt hasn't paid back either.
So I know we're eligible for an annual bonus thingamajig and I've been in the lookout for a new travel backpack. I do have one currently, but I think it's too big; for my trip to Geongju, it's on a budgt airline. I paid for check in luggage, but did not pay for a hand-carry, but it did say one free personal item (handbag or something)... my current backpack is a little too big. Found this interesting looking one, but I still want to see the actual item before buying. It costs a bit of a pretty penny (for a backpack) so it will be a little gift for myself from the bonus.
A couple months back, when the visiting artist was in town doing supervision work at the workshop I go to, I saw her very pretty apron and asked her where she got it. She said it's from The Walking Apron. I looked it up and oooh, it costs a pretty penny too, but it gives very good coverage. After much ruminating, I got one for myself and am going to gift one to my bestie. I also used an iron patch and ironed a racoon peaking out from the pocket. That's because she has been buying clothes from a particular website that has cute racoons in the design. I also got one for myself and put a cat there (to denote "Kat").
We went hunting for good naan bread (I still can't forget the good naan I had in Japan)... still doesn't compare to the one I had in Japan. But, Justindia is pretty good. I think taste-wise it's better than Woodlands. I find Woodlands too herb-y and spice-y.
Still bringing Frankie out to Coloane once in a while. The most recent time, there were some wild dogs and again for unknown reasons, Frankie didn't bother with them. I wonder why.
I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki: Conversations with My PsychiatristBaek Sehee
Amazon Product Link
The New York Times bestselling therapy memoir translated by International Booker shortlistee Anton Hur.
PSYCHIATRIST: So how can I help you?
ME: I don't know, I'm-what's the word-depressed? Do I have to go into detail?
Baek Sehee is a successful young social media director at a publishing house when she begins seeing a psychiatrist about her-what to call it?-depression? She feels persistently low, anxious, endlessly self-doubting, but also highly judgmental of others. She hides her feelings well at work, but the effort is exhausting, overwhelming, and keeps her from forming deep relationships. This can't be normal. But if she's so hopeless, why can she always summon a desire for her favorite street food: the hot, spicy rice cake, tteokbokki? Is this just what life is like?
Recording her dialogues with her psychiatrist over a twelve-week period, and expanding on each session with her own reflective micro-essays, Baek begins to disentangle the harmful behaviors that keep her locked in a cycle of self-abuse. Part memoir, part self-help book,I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki is the first book in a duology to keep close and to reach for in times of darkness.
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I was really looking forward to this book, but apparently it was just transcripts of her (her?) sessions with the therapist. By the end of the book there are essays/paragraphs of different topics. I’m disappointed, sorry to say.
It was time to sort out my nails as I'm planning to work on clay at the workshop tomorrow, so I went for a manicure. That's around 5 weeks of growth.
I'm still liking what they call the cat's eyes style. It's not just a plain colour and has an interesting shine depending on which angle you look at them.
My "Car park" cats. I can touch and sometimes pick up the black and white one now. The other one though, still skittish around me, but the bloody cat would sharpen her nails on my shoes!
Just this morning, my Mom saw me taking some supplements. She said "I read an article, you're so young, you shouldn't take so many supplements."
I replied, "when I'm not taking supplements you say I should take supplements. When I'm taking supplements you say I'm taking too much supplements. Make up your mind."
She goes "I never told you to take supplements."
And that is bullshit. If you read an article and changed your mind, fine, it's fine by me, just be honest about it. Do not try to gaslight me and say you never told me to take supplements. She's been in my hair about bone and cartilage and bone supplements, and some other sharp brain thing that she's taking for SO MANY YEARS.
I've studied the supplements I'm taking and after a long time of trial and error, those are the supplements that I know work for me, so I'll continue. I don't even take that many, it just looked that many this morning because today I wanted to take some extra probiotics as I was feeling bloated and wanted to get my bowels moving.
I'm still liking what they call the cat's eyes style. It's not just a plain colour and has an interesting shine depending on which angle you look at them.
My "Car park" cats. I can touch and sometimes pick up the black and white one now. The other one though, still skittish around me, but the bloody cat would sharpen her nails on my shoes!
Just this morning, my Mom saw me taking some supplements. She said "I read an article, you're so young, you shouldn't take so many supplements."
I replied, "when I'm not taking supplements you say I should take supplements. When I'm taking supplements you say I'm taking too much supplements. Make up your mind."
She goes "I never told you to take supplements."
And that is bullshit. If you read an article and changed your mind, fine, it's fine by me, just be honest about it. Do not try to gaslight me and say you never told me to take supplements. She's been in my hair about bone and cartilage and bone supplements, and some other sharp brain thing that she's taking for SO MANY YEARS.
I've studied the supplements I'm taking and after a long time of trial and error, those are the supplements that I know work for me, so I'll continue. I don't even take that many, it just looked that many this morning because today I wanted to take some extra probiotics as I was feeling bloated and wanted to get my bowels moving.
Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism
Amanda Montell
Amazon Product Link
What makes “cults” so intriguing and frightening? What makes them powerful? The reason why so many of us binge Manson documentaries by the dozen and fall down rabbit holes researching suburban moms gone QAnon is because we’re looking for a satisfying explanation for what causes people to join—and more importantly, stay in—extreme groups. We secretly want to know: could it happen to me? Amanda Montell’s argument is that, on some level, it already has . . .
Our culture tends to provide pretty flimsy answers to questions of cult influence, mostly having to do with vague talk of “brainwashing.” But the true answer has nothing to do with freaky mind-control wizardry or Kool-Aid. In Cultish, Montell argues that the key to manufacturing intense ideology, community, and us/them attitudes all comes down to language. In both positive ways and shadowy ones, cultish language is something we hear—and are influenced by—every single day.
Through juicy storytelling and cutting original research, Montell exposes the verbal elements that make a wide spectrum of communities “cultish,” revealing how they affect followers of groups as notorious as Heaven’s Gate, but also how they pervade our modern start-ups, Peloton leaderboards, and Instagram feeds. Incisive and darkly funny, this enrapturing take on the curious social science of power and belief will make you hear the fanatical language of “cultish” everywhere.
I planned this to be a slow listen-when-I-have-time for background noise but parts of the book had caught my attention, so this was a very pleasant surprise.
Reading the other reviews, maybe because I listened to the book, so the “getting back to this later” didn’t quite get me (though I know I’ve heard that at least thrice), there were parts of the book that really caught my interest.
Not sure if author meant as a tongue in cheek or in all seriousness, but on why some people are more susceptible to these cult bs language is when you’re in a good mood… and when you’re in bad mood you catch the BS more easily, so ergo, stay grumpy? I guess. I wonder if that’s why I can catch these cult-ish vibes so early on.
I also never thought to class fitness groups into cults but it seems to make sense.
Pretty eye-opening as I haven’t read that many books on cults yet. I felt like this was a good intro to it.
Amanda Montell
Amazon Product Link
What makes “cults” so intriguing and frightening? What makes them powerful? The reason why so many of us binge Manson documentaries by the dozen and fall down rabbit holes researching suburban moms gone QAnon is because we’re looking for a satisfying explanation for what causes people to join—and more importantly, stay in—extreme groups. We secretly want to know: could it happen to me? Amanda Montell’s argument is that, on some level, it already has . . .
Our culture tends to provide pretty flimsy answers to questions of cult influence, mostly having to do with vague talk of “brainwashing.” But the true answer has nothing to do with freaky mind-control wizardry or Kool-Aid. In Cultish, Montell argues that the key to manufacturing intense ideology, community, and us/them attitudes all comes down to language. In both positive ways and shadowy ones, cultish language is something we hear—and are influenced by—every single day.
Through juicy storytelling and cutting original research, Montell exposes the verbal elements that make a wide spectrum of communities “cultish,” revealing how they affect followers of groups as notorious as Heaven’s Gate, but also how they pervade our modern start-ups, Peloton leaderboards, and Instagram feeds. Incisive and darkly funny, this enrapturing take on the curious social science of power and belief will make you hear the fanatical language of “cultish” everywhere.
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I planned this to be a slow listen-when-I-have-time for background noise but parts of the book had caught my attention, so this was a very pleasant surprise.
Reading the other reviews, maybe because I listened to the book, so the “getting back to this later” didn’t quite get me (though I know I’ve heard that at least thrice), there were parts of the book that really caught my interest.
Not sure if author meant as a tongue in cheek or in all seriousness, but on why some people are more susceptible to these cult bs language is when you’re in a good mood… and when you’re in bad mood you catch the BS more easily, so ergo, stay grumpy? I guess. I wonder if that’s why I can catch these cult-ish vibes so early on.
I also never thought to class fitness groups into cults but it seems to make sense.
Pretty eye-opening as I haven’t read that many books on cults yet. I felt like this was a good intro to it.
Meh. Life has been uninspiring. Nothing bad, just nothing special. It's going as well as it can be.
Birthday passed, no mood at all. Big fight with Mom. She's upset with me that "I'm not generous enough to understand my Sis needs help", and I'm upset with her "with this reasoning, never ever for the rest of my life will you include me for fun stuff." Now it seems like... nothing happened. There's an invisible line of politeness. Is that what people say an impasse? Sure, that's great. I don't need to try so hard anymore to get on her good side. There's no place for me on her any side anyway.
Mechanic booked the annual inspection for my car early. "But my car is schedule to be inspected in March?" I asked. "It's fine, January-March inspections can be booked any time within these 3 months," he replies. I never heard of it, but okay, he's the specialist.
Mechanic threw in a car cleaning for me, haha, apparently my car was too dirty for his liking. But hey, his cars aren't that much more cleaner, so I don't get why he's so ticked by my dusty car. The inside is clean, it's just the outside that's dusty and leafy because I park outdoors. But I've started a new ritual now. I use a feather duster to swipe over the leaves and dust every morning before I leave for work now.
Korean classes have started. Korean vowels are weird. It's not an actual A-E-I-O-U by sound. It sounds like A-Oh-Ou-Uuh-Eh-I. I don't mind so much the Korean writing. We're still going through the "alphabets" and maybe next week will finish the basics. Then we'll go to "combination alphabets" I guess.
Chinese class structure is better this term than the last term. But the admin part of it is terrible. The teachers keep forgetting to upload course materials, update assignment dates (they're still using the due dates from the previous semester for this semester), so it's vexing in another way.
Birthday passed, no mood at all. Big fight with Mom. She's upset with me that "I'm not generous enough to understand my Sis needs help", and I'm upset with her "with this reasoning, never ever for the rest of my life will you include me for fun stuff." Now it seems like... nothing happened. There's an invisible line of politeness. Is that what people say an impasse? Sure, that's great. I don't need to try so hard anymore to get on her good side. There's no place for me on her any side anyway.
Mechanic booked the annual inspection for my car early. "But my car is schedule to be inspected in March?" I asked. "It's fine, January-March inspections can be booked any time within these 3 months," he replies. I never heard of it, but okay, he's the specialist.
Mechanic threw in a car cleaning for me, haha, apparently my car was too dirty for his liking. But hey, his cars aren't that much more cleaner, so I don't get why he's so ticked by my dusty car. The inside is clean, it's just the outside that's dusty and leafy because I park outdoors. But I've started a new ritual now. I use a feather duster to swipe over the leaves and dust every morning before I leave for work now.
Korean classes have started. Korean vowels are weird. It's not an actual A-E-I-O-U by sound. It sounds like A-Oh-Ou-Uuh-Eh-I. I don't mind so much the Korean writing. We're still going through the "alphabets" and maybe next week will finish the basics. Then we'll go to "combination alphabets" I guess.
Chinese class structure is better this term than the last term. But the admin part of it is terrible. The teachers keep forgetting to upload course materials, update assignment dates (they're still using the due dates from the previous semester for this semester), so it's vexing in another way.
The Wedding People: A NovelAlison Espach
Amazon Product Link
It’s a beautiful day in Newport, Rhode Island, when Phoebe Stone arrives at the grand Cornwall Inn wearing a green dress and gold heels, not a bag in sight, alone. She’s immediately mistaken by everyone in the lobby for one of the wedding people, but she’s actually the only guest at the Cornwall who isn’t here for the big event. Phoebe is here because she’s dreamed of coming for years—she hoped to shuck oysters and take sunset sails with her husband, only now she’s here without him, at rock bottom, and determined to have one last decadent splurge on herself. Meanwhile, the bride has accounted for every detail and every possible disaster the weekend might yield except for, well, Phoebe and Phoebe's plan—which makes it that much more surprising when the two women can’t stop confiding in each other.
In turns absurdly funny and devastatingly tender, Alison Espach’s The Wedding People is ultimately an incredibly nuanced and resonant look at the winding paths we can take to places we never imagined—and the chance encounters it sometimes takes to reroute us.
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This was a quick fun listen. My friend did not go to the pottery workshop the other day, so I put a book on as I worked on my pottery stuff.
The book itself was pretty engaging. I was able to kind of relate to Phoebe, perhaps I'm also feeling a little down?
Though I felt it was a stretch that she would rely on her cat's painkillers, but that also reflects how she wasn't thinking right.
I wonder how the hotel managed to slip in an outside reservation if Delilah had "made sure to book out the hotel" the first time around (but had to go and book out Phoebe's room after she found out Phoebe was not part of the wedding).
I liked that the story did not revolve around Phoebe in that she did out of character things (think Mary Sues kind of thing), so making it a tad more believable. Winter housekeeper sounds like an amazing job too.
.... I don't know, YOLO? FOMO? But I thought it so interesting. I already have an Apple Watch, so I don't know why I was so pulled by this analogue watch.
It's Snoopy!
I purposefully only spoke English in this shopping trip and the guy was spinning a story that Snoopy is actually first to the moon. A quick google search says that it's true. Huh. Cute. This watch can only be bought when it's snowing in Switzerland, so the website does show the weather forecast. The moon phase complication also features a unique snowflake on the moon... they say there's no 2 same watches. I wonder just how many designs there are.
No full moon yet, so I'll wait until it's the full moon to see what mine looks like.
There's a page of sample snowflakes. My friend C also bought this watch (we bought separately) and she complained that her snowflake was a thin ugly and sad design, but it's not in the page, so I guess they really are unique. Can't wait to see mine.
Besides, it's really a strange positioning. It's Swatch, you know, everyday sporty watch, and Omega, what I understand as classy premium watch.
It's Snoopy!
I purposefully only spoke English in this shopping trip and the guy was spinning a story that Snoopy is actually first to the moon. A quick google search says that it's true. Huh. Cute. This watch can only be bought when it's snowing in Switzerland, so the website does show the weather forecast. The moon phase complication also features a unique snowflake on the moon... they say there's no 2 same watches. I wonder just how many designs there are.
No full moon yet, so I'll wait until it's the full moon to see what mine looks like.
There's a page of sample snowflakes. My friend C also bought this watch (we bought separately) and she complained that her snowflake was a thin ugly and sad design, but it's not in the page, so I guess they really are unique. Can't wait to see mine.
Besides, it's really a strange positioning. It's Swatch, you know, everyday sporty watch, and Omega, what I understand as classy premium watch.
There goes the first weekend of 2026.
So I did the 108 Sun Salutations on Thursday, Friday I was fine-ish, Saturday I was dead, today I was still so-so. But yesterday I kept up with my ceramics workshop and today I kept up with my 2-hour yoga. My arms are so dead.
I sort of binge-bought a lot of different types of cat sand LOL we have so many boxes and packets of cat sand now! I also scored a nice-ish thermos flask and a pair of shoes. I doubt the shoes will last too long, they were pretty cheap to start with, but I can see from the materials.
I know I said my running friend is a little hard on the travel friend part, but upcoming we are planning to join the run in Gyeongju as I mentioned. I think I've sort of... managed to understand her thoughts and way of travel, so I should be able adjust my expectations. Besides, Gyeongju sounds like a place I wouldn't just suddenly decide to go nilly-willy, so it's a good excuse to see some other won't-easily-go-explore place.
I've got a busy week ahead. Got a few task items to complete so hopefully I can get stuff done.
I should start reading another book, got so many books on my TBR. I'm curious about I want to die but I want to eat tteokbokki... let's do it! Will be meeting my friend J tomorrow for lunch, so won't be able to read over lunch tomorrow, but should be fine for the next few days.
So I did the 108 Sun Salutations on Thursday, Friday I was fine-ish, Saturday I was dead, today I was still so-so. But yesterday I kept up with my ceramics workshop and today I kept up with my 2-hour yoga. My arms are so dead.
I sort of binge-bought a lot of different types of cat sand LOL we have so many boxes and packets of cat sand now! I also scored a nice-ish thermos flask and a pair of shoes. I doubt the shoes will last too long, they were pretty cheap to start with, but I can see from the materials.
I know I said my running friend is a little hard on the travel friend part, but upcoming we are planning to join the run in Gyeongju as I mentioned. I think I've sort of... managed to understand her thoughts and way of travel, so I should be able adjust my expectations. Besides, Gyeongju sounds like a place I wouldn't just suddenly decide to go nilly-willy, so it's a good excuse to see some other won't-easily-go-explore place.
I've got a busy week ahead. Got a few task items to complete so hopefully I can get stuff done.
I should start reading another book, got so many books on my TBR. I'm curious about I want to die but I want to eat tteokbokki... let's do it! Will be meeting my friend J tomorrow for lunch, so won't be able to read over lunch tomorrow, but should be fine for the next few days.
I seem to say the same thing every year (in recent years)... my new year's resolution is to sign off and write the correct year in documents this year. Got to remember to update my date chop too.
New Year, New Me? No thanks. But, I did go for a new challenge. The Yoga studio I go to had this 108 Sun Salutations for the new year, so I naively decided to "Okay I go!" Geezus it was brutal. 108 repetitions of the Sun Salutation (back bend, standing forward fold, one leg back, other leg back, plank, chaturanga, down dog, one leg front, other leg front, hold the ankles, stand up and back bend, standing forward fold, repeat.
I found that it went a little too fast. I didn't have time to do each pose properly. By around the 60th repetition, my arms were numb. At around the 70th repetition, one of the masters walked around and chuckled at me. I knew I wasn't doing the poses properly - there wasn't enough time for me to do the pose right! But it was funny, and while I started to smile, soon I don't know why I started to tear up. I don't know what I was upset about. But I guess it's also some yoga thing to "let your emotions out" so I let that mysterious upset run its course.
Next was the annual family 1-January buffet lunch. The gossip this time was one of the cousins didn't give presents for Christmas (said she was going home to pick up the presents but didn't have time to get home before coming over to ours) and everyone expected her to give out the presents today - but she didn't either. I dunno. I don't mind the not receiving it, but I mind the headache she avoided by not having to think about what to gift to who.
Then I took Frankie to my the only (?) pet-friendly mall in town. Dogs need to put on a diaper, so I put one on Frankie. Funny thing is, at the end, as we were leaving, he found a lamppost to pee on. I didn't want him to pee event though he had a diaper, but, I noticed his pee coming out. At home, I checked the diaper, but it was dry! But I also know the diaper DID cover over his wee wee! How?????
Maybe because he didn't park exactly IN the box, so he didn't get treats, hahaha.
When we got home, because Frankie had been having some skin issues, and we heard the cold was coming this weekend, we gave Frankie a shower, and blow-dried him too.
I went for my first run as well. I'm going to put in a lot of effort into training - my running pal and I are thinking about a race in Gyeongju, South Korea. I think i'm going to train for the half marathon (21km, time limit of 2H30M) but I will only register for the 10km (time limit 1H30M). My fastest half marathon was 2H38M and I don't think I'll be able to train and reach 2H30M in April. But I'll still be training for it.
The cold has not arrived yet!
It's back to work tomorrow (Friday) and then the weekend again. Why didn't I take the day off?
New Year, New Me? No thanks. But, I did go for a new challenge. The Yoga studio I go to had this 108 Sun Salutations for the new year, so I naively decided to "Okay I go!" Geezus it was brutal. 108 repetitions of the Sun Salutation (back bend, standing forward fold, one leg back, other leg back, plank, chaturanga, down dog, one leg front, other leg front, hold the ankles, stand up and back bend, standing forward fold, repeat.
I found that it went a little too fast. I didn't have time to do each pose properly. By around the 60th repetition, my arms were numb. At around the 70th repetition, one of the masters walked around and chuckled at me. I knew I wasn't doing the poses properly - there wasn't enough time for me to do the pose right! But it was funny, and while I started to smile, soon I don't know why I started to tear up. I don't know what I was upset about. But I guess it's also some yoga thing to "let your emotions out" so I let that mysterious upset run its course.
Next was the annual family 1-January buffet lunch. The gossip this time was one of the cousins didn't give presents for Christmas (said she was going home to pick up the presents but didn't have time to get home before coming over to ours) and everyone expected her to give out the presents today - but she didn't either. I dunno. I don't mind the not receiving it, but I mind the headache she avoided by not having to think about what to gift to who.
Then I took Frankie to my the only (?) pet-friendly mall in town. Dogs need to put on a diaper, so I put one on Frankie. Funny thing is, at the end, as we were leaving, he found a lamppost to pee on. I didn't want him to pee event though he had a diaper, but, I noticed his pee coming out. At home, I checked the diaper, but it was dry! But I also know the diaper DID cover over his wee wee! How?????
Maybe because he didn't park exactly IN the box, so he didn't get treats, hahaha.
When we got home, because Frankie had been having some skin issues, and we heard the cold was coming this weekend, we gave Frankie a shower, and blow-dried him too.
I went for my first run as well. I'm going to put in a lot of effort into training - my running pal and I are thinking about a race in Gyeongju, South Korea. I think i'm going to train for the half marathon (21km, time limit of 2H30M) but I will only register for the 10km (time limit 1H30M). My fastest half marathon was 2H38M and I don't think I'll be able to train and reach 2H30M in April. But I'll still be training for it.
The cold has not arrived yet!
It's back to work tomorrow (Friday) and then the weekend again. Why didn't I take the day off?
Fair PlayEve Rodsky
Amazon Product Link
A revolutionary, real-world solution to the problem of unpaid, invisible work that women have shouldered for too long.
It started with the Sh*t I Do List. Tired of being the "shefault" parent responsible for all aspects of her busy household, Eve Rodsky counted up all the unpaid, invisible work she was doing for her family -- and then sent that list to her husband, asking for things to change. His response was... underwhelming. Rodsky realized that simply identifying the issue of unequal labor on the home front wasn't enough: She needed a solution to this universal problem. Her sanity, identity, career, and marriage depended on it.
The result is Fair Play: a time- and anxiety-saving system that offers couples a completely new way to divvy up domestic responsibilities. Rodsky interviewed more than five hundred men and women from all walks of life to figure out what the invisible work in a family actually entails and how to get it all done efficiently. With four easy-to-follow rules, 100 household tasks, and a figurative card game you play with your partner, Fair Play helps you prioritize what's important to your family and who should take the lead on every chore from laundry to homework to dinner.
"Winning" this game means rebalancing your home life, reigniting your relationship with your significant other, and reclaiming your Unicorn Space -- as in, the time to develop the skills and passions that keep you interested and interesting. Are you ready to try Fair Play? Let's deal you in.
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hm... actually a DNF but I think I had finished the "theoretical" parts of the book, I had to stop when it was just a continuous listing down of specific examples because it was just getting my blood boil and annoyed and I DO NOT NEED my mood to be affected on this fine day.
If I have to read... "pun intended" one more time........
IMHO, you don't just breakdown tasks into sub-tasks. Nice of her to add sub-tasks to her tasks, but his tasks are just the one task... which, objectively AND subjectively can be broken down into several sub-tasks as well, so why do only her tasks get the sub-tasks? Is that to inflate her number of tasks? Is THAT considered fair?
In a way these feel like... "people with money" (first world?) problems. The never-ending chicken-or-egg question... yes, you have the home making mental load, yes, he is the breadwinner, but hey, he does have his mental load at work. He can just not work, and there will be totally no money, and with no money, you have a different set of problems.
I'm not saying I agree that the breadwinner is the total winner here. The breadwinner should also be compassionate about the home maker's mental load, just as the home maker should show compassion to the breadwinner's mental load at work. You think sitting there in the office/workplace is such a stress-free no-need-for-mental-gymnastics job?
Alright, I'm not married, don't have kids, and I do not live in the US, so I can't really comment much on the specific tasks and way of doing things and such. But hey, it comes down to respecting your partner's (be it life partner, work partner, colleague, friend, spouse, whatever) work and time and whether or not they are putting the time and thought to be considerate of the other.
Maybe I'm naive and don't get the real issue because "you don't see the problem until it happens to you" but, I think it's all about being respectful to each other's time and effort.
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