bigjohn

“Old age ain't no place for sissies.” .. Bette Davis

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  • My Life and Times

    I was born in 1939 BC.
    That’s ‘Before Computers’.

    Luckily I survived the following events in my life, such as

    World War II, The London Blitz, Rationing, and worst of all… Archbishop Temple’s School.

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    During the mid 1950s I was enjoying Rock ‘n’ Roll and being a first generation teenager, when suddenly, just like Elvis, I found myself in uniform during ‘The Cold War’…and then

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    I became ‘a family’. Which meant that I sort of missed the ‘swinging sixties’, but still managed to look a complete prat in the 70s, just like everyone else.

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    During the ‘Thatcher Years’ I lost my hair and a lot of people lost a good deal more. My career fluctuated to say the least as I was demoted, promoted, fired and hired a number of times, but still I managed to stagger on into a welcome retirement and to celebrate 60 years of happy marriage.

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Archive for February 1st, 2007

‘Trolley Trance’ III

Posted by Big John on February 1, 2007

They are still after me, those Sainsbury’s supermarket ‘zombies’.

Today I had a total of 76 items in my trolley (cart) when I reached a checkout which was free of customers.

I had no sooner placed half a dozen things on the conveyor when a creepy little bloke shuffles up behind me, ignores my overflowing trolley, puts a ‘next customer’ divider behind my first few items and proceeds to load his purchases on to the moving belt, leaving no room for my goods.

“I think that I am going to need a bit of space, mate” I say pointing to the ‘mountain’ of groceries still in my cart.

His eyes turn towards me and I see that ‘the lights are on, but nobody is at home’. I then notice that he is accompanied by a little grey haired old hag, who mumbles something into his ear. He grunts and moves his items back a few inches, but does not take them off the conveyor. He just keeps sliding them back as I pile up my purchases.

I load my bags into my trolley and turn to put my credit card in the machine; and guess what ? … This brain dead creature has pushed his cart into the space where I need to stand to enter my ‘PIN’ number. In his dark world I do not exist !

Perhaps I should start shopping at another store ?

I wonder if they have ‘smarter’ ghouls  … at ‘Tesco’ ?  

Posted in humour, rant | 6 Comments »

 
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