HATING NURSING!

second week of posting!!....

now i realised tat i haf to continue blogging...or else, i will go insane one day soon!!...

1) working wif someone who are selfish is a TORTURE!!! how am i supposed to do communicate to her?why on earth there is someone who is so selfish?!!...everything i have to do either manager or a runner in a cubical...while she is js doing "dunno what"...ish ish!!...ask her to help me to do something, she will only tell me to that other juniors are doing, so she doesnt have to do!...while i;m a manager, she acts as a runner, but she dint..she dint act as a runner!she oly doing one to one nursing care in two cubical of 12 patients!....what the ****!!...it makes me more frustrated with patients who are too overly pampered!...ask to do this and that when i'm so terribly busy, while my partner is not helping at al!!

2)i cant hand in my research proposal on time!...due to my supervisor who keeps changing my subject and minor things around...!what can i do or say?...i haf to just follow?...but tat selfish gal hand up her proposal forms without the whole written proposal.. plus, her supervisor din change anything for her at all!!...what man!...where is the quality of this research or the purpose of it??...why some supervisors can be some annoying??...i hate this part of my life now!!...

now, it makes me thinks that i dun like being a nurse!!...i like to manage the ward provided with good colleagues...if not, i will hate it like now!!....i was so frustrated with the current condition but i cant do anything at all!...I"M STUCKED!

week 4!

these few days....hmmm....soo tired...

everyday is read n read n read...either notes or journals...

im sooo immune in seeing journals d...immune to many many words..tonnes n tonnes of it...

i just finish reading my notes on teaching and file up then, oh gosh im so proud of myself suddenly...i've read more than half of it!!...woohoo~~...okie, for now i shall start on writing my teaching plan d...cant waste anymore time...

people used to say biological clock ticking, but mine conditions are biological clock ticking, and oso my datelines are ticking too...

just now in class, ms siew said, "women are ad started menopause at the age of 30!!...meaning your eggs(ovum) will start to die one by one, slowly....whn u reach 30!!"....oh gosh, it's like 7 years more to go....

today went to see dr kg...woohoo!!...finally-->FINALLY i got his approval for the things i wanted to do!...so now i can proceed further!....got the ohhhmmmm....=)

back to journals...pnee~

no smoking!

saw tis video on youtube...




hmmm, it's quite touching but..as a nurse, i dun see d clear message they want promote no to smoking...because all the three patients' conditions may due to other causes...the last part only shows tat the cigarette pack n ended wif "dun break my heart"...i guess i'm not artistic to interpret this...i'm sooo science based:P

stressor~

lately, been sooo superb busy....i guessed this is the type of workload i'm gonna haf for the whole one year to come...

never i will sleep so late last time but nw had changed...slept at ard 2 plus everyday...reading and reading, either notes o oso notes...or finding and reading journals....it had been so stress for me!...wanted to shout out loud evrytime and cry out soo many times...weeped few times and i remind myself again and again i have to be strong!...strong n strong!....

in d midst of this stress, ning was here wif me...i'm vr glad to haf him but at the same time frustrated...at times, maybe caused im too stressed, i just cant stand the way i'm talking repeatedly to him or asking him again and again...either he dint concentrate well or i din express well...i just hate to talk much tis few days...din noe why, but i reli hate to talk...

and regarding the course workload are reli killing!!...my research title had been banned again and again, more than 10 topics i cracked my head out for him and yet nicely he just told me and janet we haf to read more...read more journals and see wat u can do!....wth, u didnt even tell me wat's d reason my title cant be used precisely and js pushed me away by telling me to read more journals?...*in d other way, i should see it as i dint read enough...* so continue reading!

add oil=GAMBATEH to myself.

Breaking Up~

why everyone is breaking up nowadays??

i open fb, so many from in relationship changed to complicated to single or just delete their status frm being published...

is tis a season of breaking up??

one by one...slowly slowly....

first, i admit myself was one of them....but them after 2months plus, we finally got back together. dont know how or why...i told myself n everyone i can be strong but when i came back for all my classes, i realised tat i cant. stress was one of my major problem, even tho i tell everyone about it but no one could ever made me more relieved than him. d moment i started to talk to him, i felt better. then i decided i should give both of us another chance rather seeing me n him suffering. he has done infinity stuffs to make me go back wif him from begging, crying n evrythin u said he would agree as long as u goes back with him...so wat more i can ask, is another last chance.

and yet, we were happy again even more loving than last time...but one by one around us are breaking up...reminding me of the song...tat once heard few years ago and same situation like now happen...i promise u by bsb~~

wat is wrong wif everyone?why everyone havin n facing relationship problem??is tis a season??season of no "yue lao"...is it yue lao or goddess of relationship thingy?...sigh sigh~~

pnee~

What Learner Are U?

today we haf a questionnaire from ms eliza to identify what type of learner are we...so that we could learn in the better way...

and i'm someone learn best with auditory based learning!...wakakakkaa......and worst reading learner....how should i say?...ms eliza said, i should put all my notes into a form of lyrics!...wooohoo!!....

good enuf of me to help u people identify wat learner are u....

just click here--> http://www.vark-learn.com/english/page.asp?p=questionnaire

well, and see which are u!

MiXeD~

Few more days before gettin back to classes~~ Let's blog something about my current feelings-mixed~

How much i gained and lost from this holiday...

Met good old frens which nv met since form 5?....*Good one*

Being in such a complicated self*Bad one*

I was wondering and been thinking a lot...a lot more about relationship between a guy and a girl.

How many can forgive n forget their loved ones betrayed them even they had changed and realised their mistakes? Forgive is YES...BUT...FORGET?...or shall we give another chance to everyone who realised their mistakes, mistakes that ever hurt YOU so deep, a mistakes that you think you might never forget. Repeated same questions kept pondering all over my mind...Will you regret leaving and being cold hearted?But wat if i did give another chance, does it mean tat i'm opening myself to have the possibility to be hurt once again?How sure are you he had been changing and it's forever he will never repeat it again?Or should i just move on?..I'm so afraid to make decision. *criess*

pnee~

31st for Baskin Robin~

it's 31st July~~!

it's Baskin Robin day...Yeah Yeah...so i went down to town...since i'm in town, i haf my go haf my haircut... i din noe wat or how to cut...basically i js want to cut my hair!!....

i went to the shop tat ade went the other since in DP d, so went in and sit down...duno wat's wrong wif me, i js cant hear wat the stylish asking me and i'm soo blur tdy...all questions were unanswerable to me...eg...

He : wat type of style u wanted to cut?

Me: hmmm, i haf no idea...

He: Huh?*laughed doinkie-ly*

Me: Yes... i duno...

He: Okie...short o long?

Me: Long....hmm...then i finally know wat i want....

Then he started to cut~~....

Turned out....deng dang!!....

my fringe turned to be soo short, like last time d...i guess i need to pin it up~*childish look again!*

after cutting, did some window shopping in DP for a while....but ended up nothing to buy?...

Crossing over to MP...gettin my Baskin Robin....Yeah, been craving for it since soo long and finally today is 31st which means thy haf 31% reduction for all their handpacked~ i bought a pint of peppermint and very berry strawberry!!...yum yum deli deli~~

then HOME i go~~...

peinee~

10 reasons to learn mandarin!

i urgently need to learn mandarin....

10 Reasons for it!:-

1) i duwan to see unknown characters all around when finding some nice dramas o songs online:S

2) i duwan to just look for pictures & roman letters in CHINESE newspaper!

3) i want to sing k in mandarin song precisely clear n understandable!

4) i want to write in mandarin = can be unknown to others = secret!

5) i want to see others' secret!:P

6) i want to communicate in mandarin using their proverbs accurately!

7) i duwan to be left out whn asked to sing k wif my coursemates?*can also be one of the reason*

8) i wana work in places whr mandarin are used more often than others -taiwan, hongkong, etc...

9) i wana learn japanese which required mandarin as a basic requirement!...where made me cant work in japan oso!!

10) my utmost regret i duno hw to read mandarin:'( and now it seems kinda late~!

-peinee~

Emergency Unit~

holiday seems like sooo short tis round....

wake up, eat, watch drama, eat again n sleep...*tis is my daily routine!*

and occasionally...OCCASIONALLY....go out n hang out wif frens in mlk left d only one...tan geowayne:(

my current drama...*teng teng....*

E.U.= Emergency Unit!....

Review: Good n touching undercover cops' stories~...salute their spirit and energy they haf for the police force...they are soooo willing to sacrifice anything, they really mean ANYTHING to get to the things they want...evn families and their loved ones...like one character inside named Laughing, sacrificed 9 years of being an undercover cop and left the one he loved most, Wendy....dont care wat others said and look, sacrifice for the nation...so wai tai...*Almost finish, left few episodes..*

after this...hmm, maybe wana watch great way to care?...hmm,anyone noe whr to dl tvb series?...

-pnee~

NeW LoOk:)

new look of my blog.....

welcome and enjoy!!....

oh ya...special feature, can just click wthr u like the blog o hate it!....no offence so just comment:)

-peinee~

entry 1

another day....in ICU!!

a place whr i found somewhr to love...i really like working there...although, i hated taking vital signs in the ward and serving for soooo much patients...but in ICU is different!!!...i like taking the vital signs and also serving for the patients without any no no in my head....that's reli something tat surprised myself too...probably i really empathy them more than sympathy them...patients there are superb chronic where i felt tat my upmost care are needed here no matter hw painful my hand is....i will do anything to care for them...i found myself as a nurse here...

i cared for a patient wif 60% third degree burn with inhalation injury!....his whole face and abdomen were badly and deeeply burned!...smell and looks like...roasted meat....*arg* i felt so bad for it...it was soooo painful for me to see him...every dr are bringing infections to him whr i needed to remind all of them...making them realize their mistakes and did the best for him....his family members were in trauma and all i can do is gif a pat on her shoulder....especially his wife...its such a pity to get such a burn but still patient's P&C i shall maintain here....

yeah!!...tmr goin somewhr neww...BATU PAHAT!!...for community services...hopefully things would be better after tat...a new beginning....*so random-no connection*

pnee~

decisions.....

these days...been trying to suppress my feelings a lot...

towards EVERYONE~

felt sooo stressed that only a few that would understand how i felt....

i'm on a diverted path now, whther to choose right o left path?...

RIGHT....

OR

LEFT....

which will ended up better??

confused but din dare to decide:(

scared of making the wrong decision....

pnee~

home?

finish assignment!yea...one more to go.....add oil!

shud i go back malacca tmr...a place full wif memories.....

shud i?

or

shudnt i?

complicated me~

pnee!

Kenangan Terindah!

one song that stucked up rite in my head....represents my feelings most~



it's true tat i cant think n reminisce back those times...but this song is js like snug fitly into my heart~...

pnee~

full stop.

i can stil remember d last time when i abandoned my blog for a while...it cause of relationship problem...

and nw it came again...evn more worst than i could imagine...

tis wasnt d same anymore...i wasnt the old me who used to be so nice, tolerant and so on...evrythin happened js like a rupture of a volcano...i din grow and learn frm the past...

evrythin left was js memory to ponder over whnever i'm free?...i wana be like the computer where can js delete things easily!!or full stop to everything....

argh...din noe wat to say o do here...

okie get back to my assignment~

chaoz...pnee.

lazy blogger!

now i was posted in a&e for almost 2 weeks d...

gosh!!!....i love it so much...especially the trauma part...intubating the patients, cleaning their wounds, maximized the usage of everything n anything that are available to save the patients, and lots lots more challenging things!...

seeing patients just after their accidents, cutting their clothes and cleaning their wounds immediately...my friends they just do as what they always do at home, but in my opinion, i reli tink that we should somehow maintain sterility of the wound as possible to prevent further infection....when i pointed out my view, hmmm...i guess, they must be thinking, u think u very smart??...thy ignored me and said hmmm....i guess i offended them...but still i'm on my stand that we have to do the best to protect the patient as we're the first liner in saving them and it is very important...anything that went wrong will cause hurt not only now but sometimes may be forever such as amputation n paralysed!...

AND

especially now with influenza and meningitis outbreak, the a&e department is none the less taking the strict standard precautions as it is the first line in saving the patients..and we were given prophylaxis medication today!!...argh....am i gonna die as there was already a patient passed away due to meningitis today!!and the patient came in to A&E yesterday when i was working and i forgot whether did i attend to him??....A.F.R.A.I.D.

this is the challenging part!!

i was getting lazier to blog nowadays...duno why....:(

rush of adrenaline....

after so long, i'm back wif blogging...

well, first week in A&E dept, indeed reli a great experience for me...from community to a&e dept is a reli different working situation, from the slow moving to the fast fast pace setting!....hmm, i like working in tis kind of situation rather than the slow moving pace....from the adrenaline rush from head to toe keeps me awake n makes the time flies so fast...another week to go, hope to learn n gain more..seeing more more cases and gain more experiences....saw cases which i never seen outside, such as accidents-terribly injured to the necrosis of the limb!...the whole leg is black, i repeat BLACK!!!..

i get the chance to insert intravenous line and draw blood!....some successful and some not, cause some overweight and too old...hehehe....first time poking in the big huge needle seems scary to me...i felt pain under my skin when i'm poking it too..but hope to do more n more to be more expert:P

after so long din blog, kinda lost touch n din noe what to write....

btw, i'm goin back tis week!! but nick is out in hosp due to chicken pox:( his whole face is full wif the vesicles, pity him**....hopefully he can be discharged when i'm back....tho he's out from hospital, he cant go out oso lar...

oh then, i found out so many things in fb n oso reality...a lot of ppl are attached n even married...tis shows how time flies wif us growing up....older n older each day but am i turning wiser each day?

-pnee~

Flash back~

phew....one month plus i abandon i-peinee here....

okie, updatezzz...

i was so busy wif my malaysian studies assignment which was on tun ahmad badawi, we actually made a video of his rise and falls....in d the end, our lecturer, Mrs Phoong praised us for that video and suggested to send him a copy....so we're trying currently~

meanwhile, so many things that had happened made me realised a lot of things...friends are just friends...but good friends always remain true friend!...selfishness is what i realised that most of them have....tho i still have to move on~.....

then, i'm posted to this little small town-Kuala Kubu Bharu, a small town at the downhill of Fraser...aborigines here are our aim here....met a few but still looking forward for more experiences like visiting their homes....PLUS!!....i went to school for dental health and giving injections to the primary students....it reminds me lot when i was in primary~...miss those times when i was pampered by everyone and there's no worries at all...

hmm...till then...chaoz~

Happie Retirement Mdm Teo!

js the moment of flash back after so long...

i opened my long lost friendster....i saw tis-->"madam teo bee choo is retiring on 23rd feb 2009", says ms tan kim guat...

madam teo is definitely d most memorable teacher for me...she taught me mathematics t in form 6...oh gosh, i still can imagine her face when me, jul n daph starts to talk...the way we talks during her classes irritates her...*sad*worst of all, when she called us out to take our test result...she wil insult us like anything...and i still remember how she used to write on the board using her left hand after she injured her right hand and was on POP...so kesian but we can laugh at the way she writes...hahaha..."terrible...*now she finally gonna retire..oh no....kinda miss those times whn we got scolding from her...haha...if we were be better students, she will love us rite?:P

but mhs is gonna lose another good teacher d...she's indeed a good teacher minus....her scoldings:P

anyway, wishes her haf a happie retirement!....

loves,pnee~

Scribbles~

Another new semester...

Finally after a super duper long break...here i am back....in IMU...dunno shud be depressing or happy that i dun haf to rot at home anymore...

A long long break during cny....learned to make dumplings, cookies like pineapple tarts, fried arrow head...

After everyone went back for their daily routine, i'm still rotting at home...but lazy to blog as there's nothing for me to talk about...*so shitty life*...

Then...miserable things cane about, js when i am about to go holiday...my third aunt passed away due to lung cancer...

From there, i realised that i was not committed fully to being a nurse...*how could i doubt a question like tat when i'm in semester 6, third year??*....i'm so dumb rite...when my aunt was admitted to the hospital, it took me so long to think whether to care about her or not...visited her a couple of times in the hospital after i helped her in admitting to ward...hmm, but in the end i dint take the courage to take care of her at all..and when she passed away, i din shed a tear at all..i felt tat i turned into a very cold blooded creature...i reli doubt myself being a good nurse in future...

~pnee!

25 things about me!

Being tagged by ade in facebook but i prefer doin it here....

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you....

1. My name is PeiNee which is very common...
2. I am a future nurse:)
3. I have a very funny, nottie, wild and wicked bf.
4. I am always been mistaken as a Malay or a mixed-chinese or non-chinese....
5. I am a pure chinese-hokkien.
6. I am from a very complicated family...
7. I am J of daJerk. ;) (consists of danielle, adeline, myself, june, eeleen, evelyn, regina and kell ly)
8. I love my moles on my face, and it would be best if it wont be so big:P
9. I haf to like brown and green which are my lucky colours.
10. I love black, red, yellow and white...*in order*
12. I hate liars who lied even when they are being caught and proof are there.
13. I like to day dream~
14. I like to stay in bed whole day sleeping.
15. I love december to january to february to march:)
16. I love puppies...
17. I hate cats!
18. I love to drink teh panas!
19. I love to eat yong tau fu.
20. I am kinda addicted to zen's cakes.
21. I am learning to read mandarin.
22. I love go karaoke to destress.
23. I wanna have lots of money to do so much eg. travelling, shopping, etc.
24. I wonder why sex is a basic need in order to reach the top of the maslow hierarchy.
25. I've once fantasized about being a lesbian...hahahaha...

to tag people....julyn, daphne, eeleen, xiashien, jo-n.

a catch up!

it's been a while since i last blog...even tho i was having my super long holiday...

let's start wif my bday...me n ning went to my haf my fav cake in nadeje...yumm yummy deli~..then it was another surprise by ning...on the 12th, he was called out for duty and left me wif his cousin in is granny's house...before he left, he gaf me a bouquet of roses~...a dozen of total..then u stayed at his granny's house waiting for him to come back...then when he's back, he went to the kitchen to have his dinner...suddenly when i was goin to the kitchen, he is lighting the candles for the cake...i was shocked but all i did was laughed out loud cause i saw everything which supposed to be my surprise...

next..chinese new year~~....went visiting n stuffs....

meeting up wif dajerc...catch up wif everythin...but didnt manage to catch up wif the rest like jul n the rest of f6 classmates:(

well,prob next holi...*look fwd*

on the third day, soohui,mingling,eugene and my doinkie ning gaf me another surprise bday celebration...it was reli indeed a surprise cause i reli dint expect tat...

hmm,still holidaying while the rest is back to classes n works...

time flies...everyone is growing up, i used to wonder how long could we maintain the friendship that was build once long ago?...

till then,pnee~

D-A-Y!:)

another day....

it's my big big day...

hmm, like no other than other day....mornings n nites.....

dunno,no special thing....ntg special tis year...

tis year will also be d same ....

-pnee-