4 months old

Lilli had her four month birthday yesterday. She is now able to roll over from her back to her tummy which she does sometimes in her sleep. She probably wakes up wondering who put her in that position and starts crying because she doesn't really like to be on her tummy. I have a feeling that she is getting better with it.

She recently learned to shake her head. We ask her a question like "Are you tired?" and she is just shaking her head and laughing. It is adorable and so funny.

We went swimming with her last week in our apartment building. She really seemed to like it. A friend of ours is just in town with her baby boy who is just two months older than Lilli and we spent a lot of time together last week. It was wonderful to have someone to spend the days with.

I realize that sometimes I feel a little bit lonely. Of course Lilli is always there, so I am not really lonely in the classical sense. But I really miss having people around me during the day. When I worked, I had such a structured day. I had a certain time to get up and a certain time to go to the office. Now I don't have that structure anymore. I still try to get up early, usually when dh is still around. It is nice to have someone to watch Lilli when I take my showers. She is usually wide awake and gets bored after a while and starts screaming. After I get ready, I get her ready and then we are just hanging out. Usually she goes down for a nap between 10:00 and 11:00 a.m. and then we go out and run some errands after I have a quick lunch. But I still miss the interaction with people, especially with new moms that I can relate to. It is the first time in my life that I haven't really worked for more than 4 months (technically I did work until mid September, but in reality I didn't). I miss working, having something meaningful to do.

But I realize that it would be difficult right now. It would take away time from Lilli. And she needs a lot of my attention all day long. She is growing up so quick and is only little once. Therefore I want to take this time to be there for her. And because of the transition we are still in, it wouldn't make sense to start a job anyway. But I really hope that this state doesn't last that much longer. I am really looking forward to getting to Venezuela. Unfortunately we don't have our visas yet.

I have decided to take Lilli to see her grandparents in Germany as soon as possible. I will try to book the flight after Thanksgiving. We will go up to Upstate New York for Thanksgiving to see dh's family. While I am not looking forward to the snow and the cold, I am glad that he will have a chance to see his mom and grandparents. Fortunately we are not driving up there. We have booked our flights for tomorrow night. A Happy Thanksgiving to everybody!!!

Still here...

No news on the visas. We are still hanging out here, waiting in Limboland. Who knows how long that state is going to last. We had a friend from Germany in town the last two weeks, which kept me busy.

Today Lilli and I went into my old office to babysit the telephone. My successor is out of town and had asked me to come by to make sure, there were no unanswered calls. So far it has rang only once. My former colleague was on the line to chat about life. She is due in about three weeks with her boy/girl twins. It is so much easier for me to hear about pregnancy and related stuff or go to babyshowers now that I have a baby. This Saturday we will have to go to a babyshower for a good friend. I am a little scared and nervous, but I know that we will be alright. Lilli will be there with me, smiling when my thoughts might drift to a dark place and I will be reminded of how blessed we are to have such a wonderful and beautiful baby.

By the way: if you are looking for a great gift for new babies. I have a tip for you. My realtor's daughter has a business called Hootcouture where you can order embroidered onesies or burp clothes or bibs. I love that store and I buy always things there for new babies. I love the idea that I am able to give something personalized to the baby and not just a pair of onesies that nobody remembers who has given them later...

Proud to be an American!!!

I am so proud to be an American today. We spent the evening with friends at their house and were hoping for a change we can believe in. When we took a sleeping Lilli home I whispered in her ear that she could become whoever she wanted to be. If she decides that she wants to be president one day she can become the president. I am excited that she never will remember a time where African American's weren't able to achieve everything in this country.

We are still hanging out in our corporate apartment. We haven't heard any news on our visas, yet. I wonder how long we will have to wait until we can move... It is a little frustrating to have all those beautiful summer dresses for Lilli for the Carribean when we are sitting in a cold Virginia. But what can we do? The good thing about all of this is that we have lots of opportunities to say goodbye to everybody several times. And to spend the election night in the US was very special to me, too. It was my first presidential election in the US and my first time to vote as an American - in a swing state.

On a side note: My brother is celebrating his birthday today. Happy Birthday, uncle A!!!

Isn't that the cutest pumpkin ever?