free bike

Stranger

I know, I'm so sorry. It's been incredibly long since I last posted anything here. Maybe that is due to laziness, or perhaps deeming myself overly busy with the daily grind. Either way, it is perhaps inexcusable that I have neglected my three readers for so long (a shout out to my mom and my wife). So I will give you a glimpse into what I have been doing for the last few months. Recently I have taken a job working deep cover for the CIA. I know, none of you were aware of this but I just wanted you to be warned before you witnessed the amazing transformation you are about to witness below. Here are some shots of me preparing for assignment.








Of course these are all closed cases, so I can reveal my identity on these few images, but you should see some of the other!

Buggin Out

Each year I try to get out and volunteer for the local biodiversity free-for-all, lovingly known a Bioblitz. Unlike the good old days, when all that was required for this type of event would have been a couple of bug nets, a stick or two of dynamite and a shotgun (for bugs, fish and birds respectively), today's more Politically Correct scientist has to take a more cautious approach. Not that there isn't ANY killing going on. I'm a bug guy, I'll admit it. Bugs are everywhere and there are so many different flavors that one could never get board of the same ol' thing. And THESE you can kill! Yeah, jars filled with cyanide or high levels of ammonia gas are just the thing that trips my trigger. Move over DEET, ethyl acetate come on in! Plus I love taking their fragile little bodies, colorful and gorgeously patterned by millions of years of natural selection and evolution, and cramming a steel pin through them so I can stuff um in a glass case and stare at them when ever I want. Bugs are neat!




he only tough part is that in order to fit in I've had to totally change the way I look in order to "assimilate". This requires a certain degree of facial hair, as seen on all prominent scientific gentlemen.



So I've been working on that this summer.

Lady Godiva Called...

Phone rang today
caller ID comes up "Godiva Chocolate"
Wife says "should I answer it?"
"Hell Yeah! Here, hand it to me. Maybe it's free chocolate."

"Hello"
"Yeah, is Bob there?"
"Oh, (pause...already seeing where this is going), I think you have the wrong number."
"Oh sorry."
"yeah, me too. I thought we were getting free chocolate."
"Um, no. Sorry"
"If I was Bob could I get some free chocolate?"
"Not unless you're my Uncle Bob."
"For free chocolate...I could do that."
(click...beeeeepp.)

I guess I'll have to swipe some M&M's from the kids Valentines day card stash on top of teh fridge.

-15 and counting

Just wishing it was a bit warmer...that's all.

The Troubadour

I know that years of dancing around and singing children's songs with a group of equally tone deaf and coordinated parents would finally pay off.




Of course watching Animal House 1,500 times growing up helped as well.



Ahh. I know how he feels.

Call me Ahab!

The latest expedition of the fearless, some might say reckless and foolhardy, adventurers has led us to the Great White North.



And like our Scandinavian brethren before us, our quest is to capture the great beasts of the sea, the leviathans of the deep, the great humpback whale! Alas, only too late, did we realize that the fate of our sailing vessel was sealed from conception. Her construction, though wildly innovative was fatally flawed due to a lapse of judgement in material selection. I can safely be said that cardboard be a poor substitute for sturdy planking. AArrgg! So it was to the stitchery with us to bring home our Christmas whale,using miniature harpoons and fine gossamer lines we fashioned ourselves a beast who's beauty would make our ancestors weep with pride.

Thar she blows!

Crafty Bastard

I'm a man crafter, you got a problem with that!

Where else is Santa gonna stick his booty? (uhhh...don't answer that.)






The wife needed a little pick me up too. She likes cherry blossoms so I raided the kids art supplies.