Cám ơn rất nhiều (Thank you very much)

Long time ago

there was an innocent, simple and lovely girl

who waited patiently for the right person to come into her life

One day

she encountered someone in the university

That moment became the first chapter of her love story

her first relationship

The prologue was sweet and heart-warming

but then

the story soon turned into a disaster

that she still could not begin to apprehend

When she finally realised

that she was the victim of an abusive relationship

who had to take in all the command of the domineering and selfish person

two years had passed

She began to stand up for herself

defend herself

have her own opinions on things

And she was labelled

Unfeminine, stubborn, overly strong-willed

The climax of the story was stormy

Violence and vengeance were brewing in the plot

She was no more innocent in her thought

No more simple in her actions

Her heart became more cunning than ever

She found no more reason to love

She would rather be alone then spending time fighting with someone

who was not compatible to her at all

in all aspects of life

She was tired of compromising for someone

She wanted freedom

And this time, after 4 years, she fought for it and succeeded

Her victory came

but not without a huge mess and plenty of scars in her soul

This, is the end of an unhappy story

Out of the blue

came a person

who secretly stole her attention

and transformed her inside out

Her heart which was cold as an iceberg

felt the first warmth after some eons ago

This person

magically restored her back to the person she nearly forgot existed

the innocent girl in high school

whose heart beat crazily over someone she liked

whose mind drunk in love towards someone she had a crush on

whose soul yearns to sing love songs for 'him'

She believes in simple love once again

A passionate feeling that can drive her mad just like that

without having to put in any hard effort

She is happy for now

and she just wants to say Thank You Very Much

for the someone who heals her soul without even knowing

Tiny details

When I look at the time----------minus 1 hr

When I log on to my phone ----------Facebook messenger

When I search for songs----------subtitles

When the night falls----------thinking you should be doing the routine

Before I go to sleep----------Good night!

Let it wait

Let it wait

Let us continue to be sweet everyday

Don't tell me how you actually feel for me

I am enjoying our ordinary conversation everyday

which is coated with some sweetness and fondness for each other

The kind of conversation that we could not longer make

once everything is too straightforward

Sometimes

the world we look through a mist

can be a mysterious and lovely scene

Honestly

this is not the easiest way out

For it splits me into two

one side of me wishes to know if I am the one for you

the other is already satisfied with everything that leads up till today

But this is the best resort for us

I don't want anything to ruin everything that is so delicate between us

I do not wish for my happiness bubble to burst

I cherish every moment we keep in contact

I hold dear to this fragile connection with you

So let's just be like this

for now 

:))

What should I do now?

How should I continue like this?

When I am missing you like crazy every single day

When I care for you above anything else

When I think about the distance between us that makes every possibility so bleak

When I know for certain,

that you've occupied my heart and mind

I still keep learning your language

and sometimes I wonder why I had the chance to learn that in the past

I would like to think that I was fated to meet you

And yes, it is fated indeed

but only to cross path with you

in one of the many junctions in my life

I still keep learning your language and listening to those songs

I sometimes wonder what I am holding on to

I ask myself why I am doing all these

How do I expect our story to end?

Will 'us' ever become a reality?

Will I ever be contented with just being a friend of yours?

We're more than just friends, you know it, too!

Sometimes, I regret knowing you

Because thinking of you and our current conditions makes me sad

However, most of the time, I am happy to have met you

Because the joy that surfaces from all the misery

triumphs all the tears I've shed 

conquered the heart that is bleeding with love

transcends space and time...

And this, is worth everything.

Hello.. it's me

I almost forgot the existence of this space

if I didn't crack my head to find a place to express more privately

So here I am again

And this time

I think I am in a kind of state

I would call

'happily troubled'

I think I fell for someone

Or maybe it is just a crush, I'm not so sure

But these I am certain

I am beyond happy chatting with him everyday

My heart flutters at the sight of the chat notification on my phone

His name, x message(s) received

I'd grin so widely as if I've won a grand lottery

I'd feel so euphoric, so elated

just knowing that we are in contact

even before reading what he writes

A simple 'Hi' would instantly light up my day

I could not remember when I last felt so happy everyday because of someone

I could not fathom the reasons I look forward to chat with him

or hear his voice over the phone

I'd think of him most of the time no matter what I am doing

I wish that I could see him in my dream every night when we bid each other good night

I feel so motivated and energised to be a better person

to improve all my flaws

just so that when we meet each other again

I will be at my best state

in all aspects

But I am well aware

that we are most likely not going to be together

He told me that he liked me

but there was no point establishing a long distance relationship

And I have to endure the heartache everytime someone teases him

with another girl

It certainly feels awful in this kind of situation

I have came across a saying,

"Parting is all we need to know of hell"

I knew this no better than anyone

the night you gripped and shook my hand so hard 

the very last moment I laid my eyes on you

before we each flew back to where we were

Right after that, I went back to my hotel room

and cried like a baby

I could not remember when was the last time I wept so hard

Tears were not shed for just a mere sad feeling for leaving a friend

It was then, I realised that I could not help but

develop a fond feeling for you

I don't expect any romantic outcome between the both of us

I will just enjoy the ecstasy of chatting/talking with you while it lasts

And I think our story is beautiful

And you will always

'Exist in my mind, my dream, my heart and my song'

Our song, forever and always

~~★ Two is better than one ★~~

What do I want for myself?

My first relationship is stained

It is full of negative accounts

I have changed since 3 years ago

into someone who is vengeful, stubborn, hypersensitive, impatient, quick to get mad,

judgmental, incapable of forgiving.

I do not care about a lot of things in my life now

I just want out.

My secret dream

My real dream

is to sing for my life

But this is a dream I dare not pursue

for many reasons and doubts

 I think I am born to sing

And as always,

I am waiting to be discovered

And I yearn for opportunities

to hone my singing skills

and to perform

as a singer

...