A Hard and Hopeful Week

So many things have happened this week!  Mostly great.  But also hard.  When Soren was a baby I was diagnosed with Meniere's Disease.  It is a combination of intermittent and assymetrical hearing loss, tinnitus and vertigo.  The hearing loss and tinnitus had been an issue since Simone was a baby at least.  I would have to switch the phone to my right ear and I felt like there was something in my ear all the time.

But then when I was pregnant with Soren the vertigo started.  The vertigo is the hardest part of this.  And right around when I was diagnosed I got vertigo frequently.  I've not had a vertigo episode or any of the symptoms in about two years.  I thought I was just cured.  I was super happy about that because sometimes the vertigo can be really debilitating.  And in the past there seems to be no rhyme or reason to it.  I can be eating super healthy and I'll still get horrible vertigo.

In most people it is controlled by diet and I definitely feel I can do better right now.  But sometimes it just comes.  Even when I'm eating super, super good.

So what happens is my ear starts ringing really loudly.  I can't hear very well.  I feel annoyed and irritable at loud noises like piano practicing and background noises.  It feels like something is clogging up my ear.  Sometimes it sounds like there is a large shell up next to my ear.  Sometimes I feel like I can't find the right words I want to use.  Like I'm confused and can't think straight.

Then the vertigo hits.  And sometimes its bad (puking for hours, room spinning, have to lay flat and not sway my head at all.)  Other times its just mild and I just have to lay flat and go to sleep and I'll wake up fine.  But I do notice that the vertigo makes me really tired.  My neck and head hurts.  I'm not sure if its because I have to lay in a position and not move for hours or if it is something else.

Anyway, I was so relieved when I stopped getting the episodes.  It was REALLY hard when Soren was a baby.  Starting in December when he was 8 months old I had vertigo nearly every other day for about 6 months.  Jared was traveling a lot for work, and I had a baby.  I can't drive at all and if I try to walk (usually to get to the toilet to throw up)  I look drunk during an episode.  It was stressful and daunting and super inconvenient.  Supposedly the episodes can also be triggered by stress and fatigue.  I don't feel stressed right now, but looking back at when I got it in the past I was definitely stressed!  It peaked right around both of our moves.

When I started getting the ringing again last month I was a little concerned.  But now I've had two episodes in a week of vertigo, nausea and vomiting.  And I have to admit I'm so discouraged.  Usually after an episode of severe nausea and vomiting my tinnitus improves for a bit.  But this week it hasn't.  I know I'll just have to try harder to focus on my diet and eating low sodium.  But I'm sad that I have to deal with this again.  I'm scared because I don't like the idea of having random nausea and vomiting, it can really mess with your life.  And while the hearing loss doesn't worry me THAT much since only one ear is affected right now,  I really don't want to deal with balance issues.

Anyway.  Jared was sweet and got online and was doing some research for me.  And I was able to call Matt and get a prescription for some water pills that help with my fluid balance.  I've just taken one but I feel like its helping already.  I've chugged a gallon of water and have been eating super clean.  So here's hoping I have a vertigo-free Christmas.

Luminaria, Cousins and Basketball!

This was a FUN and eventful week!

Mom was here!  It was fun to hang with her.  She is so easy and fun to be with.

Elise got her Honor Bee for YW Sunday.  Super proud of her for doing those extra service hours coaching Simone's lacrosse team and for reading the Book of Mormon again.  First time she read it she was 11.  How many 11-year-olds read it cover to cover just cause they want to?

We started the week with the Hiking Mamas Christmas Party!  It was a blast.  I really love all these women.  They are a FUN group and so supportive.

We went to Luminaria with the Hales, Atkins AND Morgan and her roommate Maddy.  It was super crowded, but so fun.  Cody is heading out on his mission this week!  That is so crazy.   Wasn't that long ago when we all lived in the same ward in Lehi and Cody, Elise and Sidney all would hang out.  Its a pretty neat thing to have lifelong friends like the Hales.  Its fun to watch our kids all grow up and be friends too.  Sidney is heading to China with ILP when she graduates!  Today was Cody's farewell!  He did great!  They are remodeling and it looks amazing.  Kinda sad that it will be 2020 before we can all do Lake Powell again.  Its been a good week for Simone because we got to hang out with the Hales two times in one week! ;) <3 p="">

We all really were amused by Jared's vintage shearling coat paired with the rabbit fur hat.  LOL.

I want to be a gingerbread artisan someday

One more month and she'll smile again with teeth.  Cant wait for those braces to come off!

We got to watch Travis and Steph's kids for a few days!  It was great to have more time with cousins. Jared and I were cracking up because Sabrina and Lexi didn't realize he was their dad's brother!  I guess when you have 30 something aunts and uncles and like 50+ cousins its hard to keep everyone straight.  Sabrina and Soren had a lot of fun together!  Keagan and Lexi and Miles and Simone all played.  Elise and Monet took Kate to Roxberry and to the store to get a candy bar for her little crush at school.  So cute.  She's such a little beauty.   We took this crew of 11+ kids to Texas Roadhouse.  It was pretty fun!

Love this photo!  This is all of us catching up after a late night.  I love getting the rundown.  

Jared and I are going through withdrawals with only one basketball game per week.  So great that Elise and Monet got on the same team.  They played great this week.  Monet really felt more confident this game and played incredible defense.  Pretty sure the other team was super annoyed.  :)  One big girl kept bumping Monet and setting moving screens and I was realllllyyy  getting bugged by the clueless refs who have probably never played basketball and weren't calling anything.
Elise got fouled hard and got whiplash from her head hitting the floor and has had a headache for a couple days.  So we watched "This is Us" all morning.  I think we needed a morning to just chill after her concussion and my vertigo.

One basketball game wasn't enough for us.  So we went to both Lone Peak basketball games and the BYU/Utah game with the Hendricks.  It was super fun!  Love those games and those friends.  I'm pretty glad we have so many more years of games.  There is really nothing I'd rather do than watch my kids play ball.  But watching their friends and peers is fun too.  I asked the girls if we could go to their friends Junior Jazz games, but they said that was "weird" and "no way." LOL.  The student section (ROC or Roar of Cougars) at BYU looked so fun!  Elise is going to have so much fun in college!  She's going to apply to Utah State, BYU, U of U and UVSC.  She is thinking Utah State sounds fun this past week.  I'm hoping BYU.

I helped at Simone's class party with Minute to Win it games.  She has such a great teacher this year.  She just loves her.  Simone has been helping the Elf on the Shelf to find some great hiding spots when Soren is in bed.  Its so awesome to have a ten year old!

An Xbox arrived at the door this week.  I'm always so curious when a package arrives for Miles.  What could it be?  Flame thrower, salt lamp, collectible cards, Carolina Reaper seeds are all contents of previous packages.  You never know whats going to be in the box, only that it will be something interesting.  Miles bought it to relist on eBay.  He should make about $100 on it and he has this really cool present picked out for Elise that he wants to buy with the profits.  Miles has matured at least a year in the last month.  I'm not sure what's going on but there have been lots of "I love you mom" moments and he's been super helpful.  Its been awesome.  He and his friends made pina coladas the other day.  I love how he never asks for help with anything, just figures it out.

He just came in and saw me blogging and first thought it was kinda cool that his mom is a "Blogger" guess he didn't know that about me.  But then he wanted to know why I'd want to write so much.  Like the blog looks pretty boring to him.  Someday he is going to like that I wrote so much.  I hope.  I look back at my posts from 2007 and 2008 and I'm so grateful I like writing.  It is crazy what we forget.  I love the stories and memories.  So even if he isn't impressed, it brings me a lot of joy.

I'm LOVING Spotify.  My family can testify that there is music playing always and I'm usually singing along.  I have a couple new favorites.  Faith Hill and Tim McGraw "The Rest of Our Life" is pretty amazing.  And I also really love most of Lady Antebellum but the song "Home" just is the best.  Reminds me of my cute husband who is sporting some serious facial hair right now.  I think it looks good on him but he looks kinda intimidating.   He's been so sweet.  When I was puking all night with vertigo this week, his concern was really sweet.  He let me know that next morning that he would get me whatever I needed, etc.  I'm in love.

This week has been full of lots of tears.  So many moments where I really miss my dad.  But I don't know how to explain it.  Its kinda heartbreaking but beautiful at the same time.  Its not an intense sadness for me.  I feel like he's here with us.  Billy Joels Lullabye came on the radio and I was regretting my mascara.  It was all over my face.  Blubbering like a baby.  Then "This is Us" has a lot of things like that so yeah, lots of tears.  The holidays have definitely made all those feelings of missing my dad resurface big time.  I guess that's part of the deal.

Elise's dress for Preference came in the mail.  Its gorgeous.  Now we need shoes.  Real life Barbies.  This is what dressing girls is like.  Its so fun.

Niece Reese, Gingerbread Houses and Cheap Skates

It was so great to see Rachel!  Dylan and Soren had a great time too.  But Reese and her cute chubby were the most adorable thing ever.  Just look at that smile!  She looks like Rachel!

Baby Selfie!

Monet's Gingerbread House

Summer's

Miles's :)

Ugly Sweater Ice Skating Date!  They call it "cheap skates"  This is the nicest boy ever.  So glad Elise and Bryson are friends.  He's a triplet and plays the piano.

The neighbors have an amazing light display with music!  Simone and Maya made about 30 different slimes today.

Its not even decorated but its still pretty!

California Getaway: Disneyland, Beach and Monet's Footlocker Race

Thanks Monet for having a race in California!  We made the most of great weather and had a fantastic weekend getaway.  The timing was perfect.

Jared had an expo in Florida so unfortunately he couldn't come.  But I looked at the weather report and figured we would go anyway and enjoy a couple days of SUN.  after Monet's last race in AZ, and impatiently waiting ALL DAY LONG for results, I decided we were going to go to every meet possible.  I wasn't sure if we should do Disneyland, but Jared convinced me to.  Isn't he sweet?  He's working and can't come, but he loves that we were going to go somewhere and have a good time.  I love that about him.  He always wants me to plan fun stuff with the kids.  I encourage him to do the same.

Skye and London came too!  I have to say, I absolutely adore these girls.  I want as much time as I can get with these seniors before they are off doing their thing.

I love, love, love road trips.  I love to drive and listen to my music.  I love to go somewhere different. It is just a great adventure.  I need more of that in my life.  Just get in the car and go.

Monet went with her team.  Its such a fun experience for them to ride the bus down and get that time together.  So we saw her a couple times at Disneyland but she was mostly with her team.

We got to visit Nana and Papa!  It was fun to have lunch with them!  Papa was holding Soren and asked him, "Soren, whose the fat guy with the white beard that comes at Christmas?"  Soren replied, "Papa!"  lol.  I was laughing all day about that.

Thursday:
It was so fun to bring Soren to Disneyland again!  Last time he went he was only 15 months.  So he didn't even remember what Disneyland or Mickey Mouse was.  I had to laugh at that one.  Its like when Simone didn't know what McDonald's was.

Our favorite rides:  Soarin over California, Guardians of the Galaxy, California Screamin, the swings (Soren was so cute!  He kept saying he was flying and just loved it.  Fun since the swings at Lagoon are my favorite too but he's too little still).  He also loved Pirates of the Caribbean, Space Mountain and Star Tours.  The Water log ride was fun too (can't remember the name)

It was so fun to stay to the fireworks.  They were set to Christmas Music and the castle was all sparkly.  It was pretty magical!

Friday:
Newport Beach!  We had fun laying out in the sun.  It wasn't that hot but it felt good anyway!  Simone and Soren dug for "clams"  (haha no idea what it was that they were digging up really).  Miles was flying a kite on the beach and playing with Soren.  We walked down the pier and took pictures.   Ended the day at the tide pools, watching the sunset and climbing the rocks around Corona Del Mar.

Saturday:
Woke up early and headed to Monet's race!  It was so fun to be there.  I haven't been to a big cross country meet like that before.  I love how Elise, Skye and London and our family was cheering so loud for Monet and their other Lone Peak runners.  They were super impressed with how fit everyone was and how cool the track meet was.

Monet came in 5th out of 260 runners in the sophomore race.  She did great!  It was hilly and a hard course but she finished a 5K under those conditions in 19:30.  A minute slower than last week, but with the hills, that was pretty good!  It was also a little challenging because she didn't know what pace to shoot for because it wasn't flat.  So its always a little tricky.  She beat a few local girls from other schools that are usually right about the same time as her.  So that's good.

Taylor did incredible too!  She got 20:30, which is unreal for starting just a couple months ago.  She has shaved off so much time off her races.  I can't wait to see what she can do next year!  20:30 with that many hills is so good.

We saw Bryce running too but we didn't see him after the race!  He was there with his XC friends too.

Later we brought Monet back with us to the hotel and soaked in a little more sun by the pool.  It felt so good.  I love being warm.  We went shopping at Fashion Island and got Cheesecake Factory.  All of us were so beat that night!

Best thing about the weekend was how cute Miles was with Soren.  Seriously.  Soren is one lucky little dude.  He may get teased a lot too, but Miles was carrying him on his shoulders, flying a kite with him, I was so happy with how respectful, helpful and sweet he was.

I LOVE being a mom.  This is my favorite stage of life so far.  I love it.  All the races, games, friends, dances, school stuff, activities.  It is so much fun.  I love hearing about everything that happens in their day.  I'm probably annoying in that I am overinvolved in some ways.  But they're just going to have to deal.  :)  I've earned it.

I'm super happy with my life right now.