Whoa, another journal entry! It's only been, like, a month and a half! This is unprecedented work!

Let's talk drugs, motherlovers.

( In which I talk about ADD, and the prescription medication I have been taking for it for almost two weeks now. ) When I started writing this I thought it was going to be a few short paragraphs about the Vyvanse and then I was going to do, like, a Tekken character costume rating. Alas, I have now been typing this post for almost ten thousand years, and thus simply do not care to do something else. Sorry, Tekken Character As Yet Undecided. Perhaps next time I update, it will be to rank your costumes from across the various games. Or perhaps I will never do this at all.

Let's be real. I'm never going to do it. (Sorry FFVIII post I hinted at last time. Sorry everything I've ever considered ever.)

shinsengumi purchased me an entire year of paid time, which means I should actually post updates! Perhaps multiple! I have long since learned that it is fruitless to say something like "I will try to post here more often", because that is always what I say immediately before disappearing for another eighteen months. But! We shall see! What happens! This time!!!!

To that end, I have started replaying a game of my childhood that I reached the final boss of but could never actually beat: Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits. It is apparently the fourth Arc the Lad game, which I sure did not know at the time! I get the impression it is a standalone game, however, perhaps akin to how most Final Fantasy games might wink at one another but are not actually directly connected. Regardless, I've never quite managed to completely forget this very silly early 2000s RPG, and now I have decided it is time to revisit and conquer it once and for all.

A quick summation! Twilight of the Spirits is a fantasy RPG set in a world torn between the humans and the Deimos. Humans look like humans. Deimos looks like just about anything you could conceive of a humanoid demon looking like. There are devilish Deimos. There are Orcish Deimos. Their are bipedal furry werewolf Deimos. There are overweight toad lady Deimos. There are reptilian Deimos who only care about money (YIKES!). There are turnip Deimos. There are lolita Deimos. But don't worry the humans are also totally cool and interesting i swear you guys no please look at our awesome human characters i'm begging you.

Reflective of that status quo, the story is split between two player characters who have their own stories. Kharg is a human of royal descent, though the monarchy was abolished when he was still a baby. He is still treated as a person of importance in the small town where he was raised by his mother, the former queen. He's a normal guy of sheltered privilege, albeit one who lives off the beaten path. Darc is a half-human half-Deimos who has spent most of his life as a slave, haunted by his dead father's lament that Darc will be the one who 'saves the Deimos'. BUT OUR HUMAN CHARACTERS ARE AWESOME I SWEAR PLEASE CARE EQUALLY ABOUT THESE COMPELLING STORIES.

Also they are 100% obviously twins who were separated at birth, like, it's not a spoiler to say this, it is extremely obvious from the outset. WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN THEIR STORIES COLLIDE? WILL THERE EVER BE PEACE BETWEEN HUMANS AND DEIMOS???

I have played the first two chapters so far, Kharg 1 and Darc 1. Thus reintroduced to both main storylines, and both main characters, here are some more initial impressions!

( Does anyone else still type lj-cut when making these or is it just me? )

I didn't even talk about the love interest situation, or the ridiculous sexual dimorphism of the Deimos races. BUT WHATEVER, I HAVE BEEN OFF AND ON TYPING THIS POST FOR A FEW HOURS NOW, imagine having the attention span to really commit to. anything! ha ha! anyway.

Been thinking about how FFVIII is really bad about letting any major character other than Squall score a win (with possibly one single exception). Will I return to make a post about that? No! I will forget! It would be cool if I did, though! Expressing my love for games through tedious complaining, the Gargant way....

Had an ASTONISHING dream last night that Death Note was taking place in the setting of Malcolm in the Middle and Malcolm had found the Death Note. He had used said Death Note, acquired the Kira persona, but due to being Malcolm from Malcolm in the Middle it had all gone horribly wrong (even more horribly wrong?). The dream itself consisted of Malcolm being taken to court and found guilty of the crime of Being Kira, sentencing to occur at a later date. Malcolm left the courtroom, met Lois and Hal outside, then stalked back into the courtroom and started furiously berating each and every legal representative present for all the stupid mistakes they'd made in catching him.

Like, yes, he IS Kira, but the way you all "deduced" it was sheer dumb luck and total conjecture! None of your reasons make sense! You're all so stupid, and the fact that you've caught him is the biggest miscarriage of justice imaginable! This is so totally unfair!

Truly incredible stuff.

In a third but slightly more traceable layer of crossover, Hal was dying of lung cancer. (Breaking Bad. This is a Breaking Bad reference. As funny as that sentence would have been by itself I feel obligated to elucidate why my subconscious would do Hal like that.)

If Malcolm actually did acquire a Death Note, I'm absolutely certain he'd use it. I even think he'd reach the same conclusion as Light about trying to use it for some sort of warped "good". However, I think he would have a peptic ulcer the size of a fist in less than a week. There is no way the stress of having and responsibly using a Death Note wouldn't send him completely deranged in a matter of days.

If Reese found it in their shared room, he would almost definitely write his own name to test it, then immediately panic because WHAT DID HE JUST DO, OH GOD, HE JUST PICKED A NAME HE KNEW HE COULD SPELL, AHHHHH

Ignoring the deeply unfortunate scenario above, Malcolm would eventually (rapidly) break down and confess his murder spree to Lois, who would laugh and say "oh honey, it's just a book, you really think you killed people just because you wrote them down in your little death journal?" and when Malcolm insists YES, MOM, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED she'd roll her eyes and tell him he's being ridiculous and he's still going to school tomorrow so get used to it.

In desperation, Malcolm would confess to Hal instead.

Hal: Oh Malcolm, it's alright—what growing boy doesn't make a few mistakes? A little bit of youthful indiscretion doesn't mean anything!
Malcolm: Dad, I killed people! Don't you think that goes a little beyond "youthful indiscretion"?!
Hal: I said what I said.

(Hal has absolutely killed people.)

Hello once again, fffx, and hello FFFX partcipant! My online handle is Gargant, and my AO3 account can be found under the same name (Gargant). I had a really great time with FFFX last year, and I can't believe it's already time again. But here we are, and here we go! FFFX 2024!

Much like last year, I will be delighted to receive written fiction or artwork. Both are wonderful options! If you would want to take any of these prompts and go the comic route, I'm excited to see what you'll come up with :>

I'm a total video game enthusiast, and my requests reflect that. This year I've asked for: Final Fantasy VI, Final Fantasy XIII, Final Fantasy XV, Tales of Symphonia, Tales of Graces, Tales of Xillia, Tales of Zestiria, and Tales of Berseria. Living that JRPG franchise lifestyle, baybee! If any sections of this letter seem particularly weighted in favour of any particular fandom/request, this isn't intentional or an indication of preference. I'll be thrilled with whatever these options might inspire from you. Follow your heart!

Some sections of this letter have been recycled or mildly edited from last years letter. I am still excited by those request options so I've pretty much copy/pasted them directly. Again, that's not an indication of preference, it's just a timesaver!

I have one universal DNW, which I have outlined in every subsequent section of this letter and I'm going to mention here as well. The one and only thing I would like to avoid in anything created for me are detailed renditions of modern medical procedures, particularly things like cannula insertion and the administration of intravenous treatments. Thank you for understanding.

With this all being said, here's a list of things I generally vibe with. Use this information however you see fit!
( Rest of the letter can be found under here! )

Time to investigate all my dreamwidth usernames in real time in a fun and exciting adventure for me and only me! shinsengumi reminded me that you can ask dreamwidth to send you your own username if you have forgotten it. Having been kicking around on dreamwidth since time immemorial participating in Ye Olde Role-Playing Gaems, lets have a look and see exactly what usernames I have and which characters they belong to!

I say this is an adventure for me and only me because a lot of these usernames are going to belong to original RP characters. There is fandom stuff in here, though, particularly toward the second half of the list. And usernames I have never used for anything despite good intentions, no doubt. Let's Investigate >:(

( there are NINETY-SIX of these things, good god )

This is a stupidly long post that took me almost five hours to type and I am not sure why I even did it, PLEASE ENJOY. Will I come back and make another update about Final Fantasy VII: New Threat? ONLY TIME WILL TELL.

I have been playing Final Fantasy VII: New Threat 2.0!

New Threat is a mod for the original FFVII. To my understanding, it was originally aimed toward making the game a bit more difficult for returning players wanting to change their gameplay experience, while also introducing some quality-of-life changes and rebalancing certain mechanics such as materia. As of version 2.0, changes can also include adjustable difficult settings, more specification aspects for each individual character, and most significantly for Nerds Like Me, changes to the actual story itself. BLASPHEME???

Well, I decided I wanted to find out for myself! New Threat 2.0 comes with two different game modes. Type A has the various gameplay adjustments implemented, but sticks largely to the OG story presented in FFVII. Type B is more malleable, taking liberties with the story and changing events around. It says the basic story beats will be the same, but how we arrive to them will be altered. Of course I decided to go for Type B.

I've not been a huge fan of FFVII:R thus far, and I don't really think Square are likely to turn me around with the final installment. There are things I've liked in both games, but the overall experience isn't for me. I don't like what Square are selling me. But I wanted to see how New Threat made me feel. I wasn't sure what to expect! Was it going to be tryhard, full of awkward shoe-horned references to other aspects of nerd culture? Was it going to represent the characters well, and if so, would it represent the characters equally well? What would it feel the need to change, and what would it keep the same? How would it treat the godawful and infamous Love Triangle Debate? Would a preference become apparent, or would it be even-handed? WHO COULD SAY WITHOUT ACTUALLY TRYING.

I did quickly decide to think of the game as a fanfiction made manifest, a sort of "what if..." scenario given room to breathe inside menu configurations and ATB gauges. I think it's let me have a lot more fun with the experience! I don't think material being cut/changed has to inherently be a condemnation or dismissal of that material. And because I'm thinking of it as someone's fanfiction, someone's "if this one thing changed, what might happen...?" thought experiment, I don't have to sit here complaining about how cutting certain scenes/dialogues changes the whole thematic purpose of FFVII. Because this isn't an official Square product, and it isn't professing to be a Remake while shamelessly tearing out the root of what made the original game the beloved classic of the JRPG genre that it is! Wow! Anyway!

I've been making notes while I play! I've just left Midgar for the first time, and here are some thoughts taken from those notes. I'll keep story-related spoilers behind a cut, and start with things that are purely mechanical.

⦾ I opted to play on standard difficulty, which I'm very glad about because I have definitely had some game over screens already and I don't want to imagine what things might have looked like if I'd been playing on hard. Nothing has ever felt insurmountable, though! But the boss fights make you play hard, no messing around. I like to play defensively, and that has been both a blessing and a curse at different points. It's nice to have to really work, and I've had genuine fist-pump moments of victory. It's a great feeling!

⦾ Every character has a unique innate ability now, which is really cool! Cloud has a sort of Defend and Counter technique - if you set him to defend in battle and he gets physically hit, he'll stick back with either 1x, 2x, 4x or an attempted Deathblow strike. Barret gets increased strength in the front row or passive heals in the back row, and his gunfire can be used like an All attack to strike multiple foes. Tifa has an ability similar to Sturdy in Pokémon—the first time she gets KO'd in each battle, she'll use her Grit to retain 1HP (and keep her Limit and buffs in tact). Aeris has a Geomancer stance when she's defending that allows her to absorb most elemental attacks and gain passive regen, and Red XIII receives gradual increases to his STR and MAG stats over the course of each battle. It's such a simple addition but it really influences my gameplay and how I choose to approach battle! I'm excited to see what the other characters have to offer.

⦾ Materia is available IMMEDIATELY, and you get a much wider and more varied range of materia offered to you much sooner than the OG. There have been adjustments to how stats are influenced when you equip materia as well. More factors to consider for gameplay! It's been fun building different character specs for different boss battles, heehee.

I'm going to talk about some Midgar story/character writing spoilers now, so be aware!

( She seems fine. Very fine, I've noticed. )

All in all, I'm enjoying the experience! Even the parts I feel more critically toward have their own sense of enjoyment, because it makes me engage with why I don't jive with it. Gets me thinking about story-writing, tone, character beats, all the good juicy stuff. What will the rest of the journey hold for Cloud and friends? For once, I'm really not sure!

Greetings, fffx participant! My online handle is Gargant, and my AO3 account can be found under the same name (Gargant). I'm an irregular exchange participant, but I find that I really vibe with long-form exchange writing, so this year seems like a good time to give FFFX a go!

I'll clarify right away that I am just as happy to receive artwork as I am written fiction. If you want to take any of these prompts and go the comic route, please feel free! I can't wait to see what you'll come up with c:

I've requested for a lot of different categories this year: Tales of Symphonia, Tales of Zestiria, the Swordspoint Series by Ellen Kushner, Final Fantasy V, Final Fantasy VI, and Final Fantasy XV. If any of the sections of this letter seem particularly weighted in favour of one of those groups, I promise that it isn't intentional. I'll be thrilled with anything these categories inspire from you. Follow your heart!

I have one universal DNW, which I have outlined in every subsequent section of this letter and I'm going to mention here as well. The one and only thing I would like to avoid in anything created for me are detailed renditions of modern medical procedures, particularly things like cannula insertion and the administration of intravenous treatments. Thank you for understanding.

With this all being said, here's a list of things I generally vibe with. Use this information however you see fit!
( Rest of the letter can be found under here! )

Whichever fandom you end up writing/drawing for, I really hope you have a lot of fun with this. My letter is here to help guide you or perhaps inspire ideas, but please don't feel obligated to stick super close to anything said here! 10k is a lot to write in any given length of time, and comics are always hard work, so please go with whatever gets you excited to hit the keyboard! Also, I'm a writer so I tend to phrase my prompts with writing in mind. That does not reflect a preference! Receiving art would be wonderful, I would love to see any of these ideas translated into a comic format. Go with whatever it natural for you, and know that I will be so excited and grateful whatever happens to come my way!

Just have fun out there, guys, and look forward to seeing y'all throughout the exchange! C:

I signed up at scaldinghotcibingo for a nasty bingo card full of dubious/non-con prompts, and my bingo card is below this cut. Do with that information what you will!

( big narsty )

I was looking at track names from the LOST OST, as I often use OST tracks or episode titles when choosing keywords for my icons. Although there is probably some risk of spoilers and I ergo shouldn't go reading too closely, it turns out that the LOST soundtrack has some remarkable track names. Some personal highlights include 'World's Worst Landscaping', 'Jintimidating Bernard', 'Early Mourning Mystery' (what a title!), 'Death Springs Eternal', 'Sayid After Dentist' (??), and 'Kate Flashes Jack' (?!?!). I love how tasteless some of them are as well. 'Boonearal' and 'Shannonigans' are honestly outrageous. 'Just Another Day On The Beach' as the first track for the episode 'The Other 48 Days' is disgusting behaviour.

So, did you know I have been watching extremely current and trendy hit television series LOST? When it was first airing in the UK back in mumble mumble fucking 2004 I was in college and still living at home. My mother and I watched series one together! Then I started university, and being away from home sort of changed the experience and I idled out early on in season two. It just wasn't the same without mather!

However, it is now 2023 and I live over 3000 miles away from my family (oops). Life in Canada has been and continues to be very wonderful! But fits of homesick melancholy inevitably occur, and one such incident led me to picking up LOST once more. And now here I am, two seasons completed and... god, what, four to go? This is so much television. I do not usually watch live-action television! I don't even watch that much animation, honestly! I could be playing so many video games and yet here I am, letting JJ bastard Abrams take me on another wild ride that I'm sure is going to end in a whimper instead of a bang.

I say that with no particular knowledge of how LOST ends except for a vague sense that it was unpopular at the time. That could mean anything from 'none of the mysteries are solved, the budget disappears, and vincent the dog is killed on-screen', to 'kate ends up with X instead of Y so show bad'. Like, I have no idea. But I do have much suspicion when it comes to Mr. Abrams, and yet here I am. Running this risk. Opening my heart to the madness.

Two seasons down, there's a lot I could say! To try and help that along a bit, the first thing I've done is complete a Character Sorter. Now I can scientifically say michael is my favourite how I feel about each character in relation to each other! Head below the cut to see more of this perfect flawless system and discover who my favourite character is!

( It might be Michael! )

For now, though, this is a long messy disjointed journal entry and I really want to go to bed, so I think I will wrap it here for now. WILL I RETURN WITH MORE THOUGHTS? Who knows! I still haven't finished talking about the fucking Ardyn DLC for crying out loud. I can not be trusted with anything.

me: my favourite character has returned after an extended absence, hooray!

me, one episode later: ahhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHH

Did you know that hit mobile phone gacha game Dissidia Final Fantasy: Opera Omnia recently had Squall and Laguna converse with one another after both being made aware of their relationship to one another?

LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT.

Unlike some folks I see chatting on places like the Opera Omnia reddit, I'm not particularly inclined to accept anything that occurs as DFFOO as canon. It's "a" canon, for sure, but the events and interactions that happen in this money-making gacha phone game are not going to shape or interfere with my previously established interpretations. That is to say, I'm not going to reconsider my view of Character X based on something revealed in any spin-off title or other alternative material. It just ain't gonna happen. (Here's looking at you, Final Fantasy XV.)

That being said, I love canon-based AUs and other forms of canon divergence. DFFOO is fun. I love seeing the sorts of questions this game wants to answer, and the character combinations it chooses to throw together. I might not ever really think of these things as truly representative of the characters, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy seeing what's out there. It's like officially-sourced fanfiction — it's not going to usurp canon, but I might still love it for what it is!

So coming back around to Squall and Laguna! A recent story chapter in DFFOO's third act focused on the Final Fantasy VIII cast, and culminated in them regaining all their memories up to and including the finale of FFVIII. Prior to this point, only Squall, Rinoa and Irvine had their full memories*.

*unlucky Irvine actually has his memories stolen by Ultimecia shortly before this chapter begins, because shenanigans. I could talk a lot about my crappy favourite Irvine and his role as the memory-bearer of his group of friends, but that is a post for another day.

After getting their memories back, Squall and Seifer spar because I guess that's the only way swordboys know how to process their feelings. Laguna cheerfully invites Seifer to come back whenever he feels like it, and Squall thinks about how Seifer's attitude hasn't changed upon getting his memories back. However, Laguna follows this up by being a bit antsy about "all he can do" to help Squall, and Squall quickly realises that Laguna does in fact have all of his memories back too.

And then Squall thinks...

Squall: (Sounds like he has his memories too. And now that he's made it obvious... I don't even know what to do.)

... Which is just so Squall that I was compelled to make this post in the first place. He and Laguna are finally standing face-to-face with full knowledge of their relationship with one another and Squall has absolutely no idea where to begin or what he's supposed to say. He follows up with:

Squall: ... I guess we don't have to do things any differently than we have been.

Laguna is momentarily uncertain, but ultimately responds with:

Laguna: We don't have to pretend to be something we're not. Hope to be hearin' more from you, fairy.

WHICH IS VERY CUTE? The fairy part, at least.

I often find that DFFOO reads like it's accurate to the source material, but it never quite matches the source material. The characters are definitely all in the right wheelhouse, but they often seem just a little bit off. As this conversation between Laguna and Squall continues, I feel like it doesn't quite sound like them. You can read it yourself here if you want to make up your own mind. I do like the idea of Squall mentioning how he and Laguna are supposed to "talk when it's all over", though. Laguna isn't ready for it, which feels frustrating and flakey but also not really out of keeping with Laguna as we see him in the game. Kind of surprised he didn't suffer any cramp.

Slightly prior to this, Laguna says to himself that "that kid [Squall] is my... a reminder of Raine" and considers that he "better come to grips with that", which indirectly raises some interesting questions. When a fictional character has had their memories forceably stolen, and then has them abruptly returned... is that character going to simply return to being the person they were before? Do those regained memories essentially restore aspects of personality that would have been altered by the absence of those memories? Or do their regained memories need to be processed all over again, a huge swarth of regained knowledge that needs time to be sorted and settle. Is there certainty in a memory regained, or a discomfort borne from the sudden revelation of things you've said and done that seem divorced from the self you've been living as for weeks/months/years?

There is no answer, and different media do different things with the concept. Light Yagami says it all went according to keikaku, and immediately picks up precisely where he left off. Laguna, meanwhile, seems as though he needs to process Squall's existence all over again.

When does canon Laguna learn the truth of his connection to Squall, anyway? It must have been after Squall ends up at Garden, but beyond that small certainty do we actually have an answer? Much To Consider....

I have finished my training to become a PSW! And I have successfully interviewed for a job!

I do not have the job yet, as that is pending references and the like. But the workplace honestly looks amazing, and I'm really excited for the opportunity. I also followed all that advice about applying for somewhere even if you don't have the recommended experience and it actually paid off, so that was delightful.

Part of my PSW training involved doing two months in an actual long-term care facility putting all my class education into practice. There were many aspects of my placement that were extremely difficult, for reasons I don't feel completely comfortable outlining here since I might be following some whistleblower procedures to report some of the things I witnessed (y e a h). But despite that, I really connected with this work. I loved it so much, and I'm so excited to move forward with this path!

Here are some short but incredible stories from during my placement! Because my residents were hilarious and I love them.

⦾ I had one particular resident who would call out every single time she saw me, and never liked me helping anyone else or really doing anything that was not specifically spending time and care on her. One time she told me "You are too kind to too many people", which might just be the most charming thing anyone has ever said to me in anger.

Of course, there were other times as well.

Resident: Where are you going?!
Me: I need to go and eat some lunch now, I'll be back soon.
Resident: Go on a diet!

⦾ One day, a resident asked me if Donald had been on the TV yet. When I asked for more detail, she clarified that she meant Donald Trump. I couldn't resist asking if she was a fan of Donald or not; I received the BIGGEST stank face in return, and was informed he can't keep getting away with it. Here's hoping she's right!

⦾ At one point, we had a Covid outbreak that required everyone to stay in their rooms. Not every resident was amenable to this request. When I asked one gentleman if he would go back to his room, he informed me that Covid was something we were making up and he wasn't going to take it. Obviously I listened to this with sympathy, and then I did the most naïve thing possible and asked if there was anything I could do that might change his mind. After a sly moment, he replied, "Show me your body".

Once I recovered from the shock I told him that I was not going to do that, to which he shrugged and carried on his way. I can not entirely fault him for that one.

⦾ I was sitting with a resident during a group activity where everyone was trying to name animals for every letter of the alphabet. My resident was enjoying being part of the social aspect but was not very able to actively participate, so when we reached 'K' and she mumbled 'kitten' I excitedly encouraged her to say it louder. She did so, but still not loud enough that the Activity Director heard her. I called out that Resident had a contribution, and all eyes turned our way as I encouraged her to say it one more time. At which point she loudly proclaimed KIDNAPPER.

Because of course she did. (She also identified V for Violence, which... yes, but also not quite what we were looking for.)

⦾ Over breakfast, a resident looked across the table at me and said something. I thought 'surely I've misheard that' and asked her to repeat herself.

Resident: Hitler.
Me: (um) What about him?
Resident: He's around here somewhere...

I promised her that if I saw Hitler I'd tell him his type wasn't welcome around here and make him leave. She was reassured. (I did not find Hitler.)


I honestly love this work, man. I hope more than anything that my actual permanent position has people even half as wonderful and colourful and full of verve as the people I worked with during my placement. I never imagined I'd be working in this field, but I find it hard to imagine ever going back at this point. This really might be the place for me!

More adventures in Pokémon Infinite Fusion! I know I need to make updates about Fire Emblem: Three Hopes (SO MUCH IS HAPPENING SO FAST?), but that requires me to maturely and intelligently put my thoughts into order, whereas updating about Infinite Fusion requires me to go "ahhh, my children, please look at them!!!', and that is much much easier. SO PLEASE LOOK AT MY CHILDREN

( I have adventured up to the SS Anne! )

After seeing zarla's posts about it, I have started playing around with a Pokémon fangame called Pokémon Infinite Fusion. It's essentially another take on Pokémon Red and Pokémon Blue, except you can fuse Pokémon together. There's an actually ABSURD number of combinations you can make (over 175,000?!), and over 20,000 of those have custom-made sprites that are so full of character and charm! The other billion or whatever have sprites generated via the Pokémon Fusion Generator, so those are naturally a bit more hit-and-miss. But the fun is constant! You never know what's around the corner, and it really scratches that itch of having new little Pokémon friends to cherish and enjoy!

( A few screenshots from my early adventure, currently I am in Mt. Moon! )

hahaha imagine if I didn't update for six months and then updated twice in one evening.... unless.... (⸝⸝•́દ•̀⸝⸝)

Over the last couple of months I have been replaying Final Fantasy VI for the first time in many many years! This was another step along the road of showing shinsengumi all the valuable Final Fantasy games of my childhood; I think we've now played FFVI, VII, and X together, and she has specifically played VIII and IX herself. I also showed her a bunch of FFXIII, although we kind of idled out of it again, and we played FFXV together as well! (Final Fantasy VIII is her favourite, @ her about it.)

But Final Fantasy VI! I last played through this game about... fifteen... years ago. Ignoring how horrifying that information is, I have incredibly fond memories of playing this game with a friend I made in college (still friends!). This was one of the few FF games where you could set some characters to Player One and some to Player Two, so we'd assign all the characters between us and play through the story reading out our characters lines and eating Flumps (back when they cost 10p, sad). Fairly certain we used silly voices for every character we disliked, which was several of them. Characters I now like a lot, in some cases!

It was fascinating seeing this game again with a new perspective, and I played the Gameboy Advance version this time which has a different translation than the PSX version! And, with all the respect in the world to Ted Woolsey who was working under horrible constraints and still brought us iconic lines that persist to this day, the GBA translation is so much sharper. I feel like character motivations and story beats were just so much clearer than they used to be. It really brought me closer to the story than I'd ever felt before!

Playing again also gave me an opportunity to rectify some of the mistakes of the past. ***Incoming spoilers for a game that originally came out in 1994!*** The most significant thing I got to do differently this time was rescue Shadow from the Floating Continent! I never knew this was possible when I played through the game prior to this, and was shocked and horrified the first time I saw this piece of fan art (that I am reluctantly linking to on pinterest because I can't it at a home source, but this is the artists actual page!). Shadow turned out to be one of Fel's favourite characters, second only to the irrefutable Best Boy Gaugaugau, and I really enjoyed finally getting to see his story through this time! More on that in a moment.

I've also never explored the Ancient Castle before, and in fact did not even know it existed, so that was kind of wild. Just an entire optional dungeon with bosses and espers and lore and I just had no idea it was even there, oops. And we did some of the GBA exclusive content as well, like fighting Leviathan, Gigantuar, and Gilgamesh! I think we've Iprobably finished playing through together, but I might still poke around in the two post-game dungeons that were added for the GBA release. And if it turns out those dungeons actually have added story content then I will grab Fel and we'll proceed together again, I suppose!

The ending of FFVI is actually more lovely and more hopeful than I remembered, for all that it's quite simple and abrupt in what it portrays. It's a very immediate finale, focused pretty exclusively on the characters escaping peril and witnessing a new dawn of hope for the world. But it's just full of lovely little character beats, and really wonderful visuals for what they had available at the time, and such an energetic and ambitious soundtrack. I'm really so happy to have played it again!

But yes, Shadow. I was quite taken aback by the ultimate conclusion of his story, especially compared to everyone else. ***Again, spoilers for a 1994 video game!*** When everyone else is escaping, Shadow opts to stay behind. He isn't rescuing anyone, he isn't making a brave sacrifice for anyone else's sake. He just... decides to stay behind and die. Because he's done running from his past, and he's ready to face his mistakes on the other side. That being how he characterises it himself: he says he's finished running, and he hopes Baram - the partner he once abandoned to save himself - will greet him warmly. It's a real sombre note in the middle of everything else, and it's something that isn't touched on anywhere else in the ending.

He does, of course, send Interceptor away. First he attempts to do so more harshly, but Interceptor doesn't leave Shadow's side until Shadow kneels down and takes a longer moment with him.

Interceptor is a really good dog, you guys. And I'm glad I finally got to see this sequence. I'm not sure what my ranking of Final Fantasy VI characters would actually be if I was forced to list them all from favourite to least favourite, but I can say with confidence that Shadow is now much much higher than he ever used to be. The accursed shinsengumi influence strikes again.

I am now playing Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes, which only came out yesterday! Because you know what Fire Emblem: Three Houses needed? It needed a canon AU sequel that plays out the timeline in a completely different way that just so happens to specifically to cater to me. ... I mean, I doubt that developers were actually thinking "let's design this around everything that Gargant would love best", but I'm telling you right now, that is what is happening so far.

I will make a proper update about it soon, with current thoughts, theories, and maybe some early spoilers! I am playing the Golden Deer route first, because I have standards and I know what is up. My god, though. I am being fed so well so far. So very, very well.

(Approximately ten thousand years ago, I started writing a post talking about all the alternate costume options that exist in Dissidia Final Fantasy: Opera Omnia, and giving my opinions on which costume I preferred for each character. I can't remember exactly when this post first started taking form, but I think it was sometime in February. Regardless, it is an endeavour that has actually proven too great for me. I keep not updating here because every time I come to write a post, I see this draft and think "oh, well, I really have to finish that first", and then becoming overwhelmed and walking away instead.

SO, I'm making myself post it right now. Unfinished! Half done! An incomplete concept! And absolutely nothing terrible is going to happen as a result, and I will finally be free to talk about other things. So please enjoy my opinions on about half of the optional outfits in Opera Omnia, and apologies for the semi-abrupt halt!)

LET'S TALK ABOUT OPERA OMNIA, BAYBEE

You would assume I'm going to do another story post, but instead we're going for something much more silly and pointless. Here is a google doc featuring every Opera Omnia characters alternate costumes. I am going to tell you which costume I prefer for every character who has an alternate option available! And I encourage you to share you own thoughts as well!! Let's do this thing!

( There's something like 84 different costumes to talk about. This is a horrible idea. )

KEPT YOU WAITING, HUH

Fancied doing an Opera Omnia post, so here we go! Last time out we covered Act 1 Chapter 3, in which Seifer ran around posturing a lot and actually legitimately not that much else happened. But things are going to be a bit spicier this time, as we come face-to-face with some Final Fantasy VI! And I am going to try and keep this more focused on interesting moments rather than regaling y'all with every detail of every single moment.

LET'S DO THIS THING. Chapter 4 is called Snowy Peaks of Crudelis, and features new characters from Final Fantasy III, Final Fantasy IV, Final Fantasy VI, and Final Fantasy XII.

( ...And the pieces of this puzzle will fall into place soon enough. )

This is arguably a more plotty chapter than the last one, but I think it's a lot less fun all in all. There's something just endlessly entertaining about Seifer and company, I guess! Regardless, though, next chapter includes the introduction of Laguna (which is exciting!), and Maester Seymour (which is seymour), and a few others as well. For now, though...

CHARACTERS INTRODUCED: Terra, Penelo, Kefka, Yang, Onion Knight
*italicised characters not recruited/playable

p.s. I live in Canada now! I've been here for... almost a month?! Almost a month already. My god.

LOOK WHO'S COMING TO OPERA OMNIA, MOTHERLOVERS

I mean, spoiler alert for upcoming JP updates/the future of the Global version, but...! Lord Braska himself, playable for the first time? To be honest he might be playable in Final Fantasy: Record Keeper or one of the other mobile games/spin-offs, but whatever. This will be my first experience with playable Braska, and possibly the richest source of information we'll have ever had for who he is as a person and how he interacts with people. He'll meet grown-up Yuna! He'll meet Tidus, the much-mentioned son of Jecht! And he'll get to see his Guardians again, with Auron now much older and grizzlier than last time they met. Much to think about!

I don't really take material from things like the Dissidia games to have much true reflection on canon, much the same way that I don't take anything from subsequent Compilation games to have anything much to do with Final Fantasy VII. Each game was made at a particular time, in a particular climate, intended to delivery a particular story with a particular message. Five, ten, twenty years down the line? Circumstances change. People change. But that being as it may, I still enjoy seeing what this additional material has to say about the original canon. I might like some of it, I might hate some of it! But it all gets me thinking about the thing I originally loved, makes me contemplate my own perceptions and settle my own sense of what the canon is to me. So I'm looking forward to seeing Braska! And I can't wait to see what wildcard character gets added to the roster next. I can't believe Braska was added before Rikku. I'm not gonna lie, I kinda love it.

So on the note of things that extend from the original canon but don't necessarily change my mind about said canon, I think it's about time we chatted about the Final Fantasy XV Ardyn DLC! Which was probably released close enough to the original source material that I should trust its contribution, except I have approximately zero faith in Tabata's integrity and fully believe he switches direction like a weathervane. I'm gonna give this a reasonably thorough description below the cut, so you shouldn't read any further if you want to avoid spoilers!

That being said, do I actually recommend playing this DLC? Ehhh. It's tricky. I don't think it's really worth it for the story, all in all, which is a shame. And it takes entirely too long before you get to start fucking around as Ardyn wreaking havoc in Insomnia. But when you do get to that gameplay? Damn, but it's so much fun. So much fun.

Also, novelty hats!

But alright, let's do this thing. I actually played the DLC months ago, but I rewatched all the cutscenes today while ironing so that I could write this post. Also because I gotta do something to make ironing work shirts a bit more bearable.

(NOTE: This post is far, FAR too long right now, so I'm going to post this as Part One and continue talking about the rest of this DLC at a later date. Because otherwise it's gonna be another three months and I'm just never going to finish. So! Spoilers for the first, like... thirty minutes or so of the DLC. Also I got a bit hyperactive the longer I went on typing about this, so I apologise for the energy toward the end of this post. Verstael has that effect on me, apparently. I will return to discuss the rest of this DLC at a later date!!)

( 'There is happiness for those who accept their fate. There is glory for those who defy their fate.' - Princess Tutu (2002)' )

And that's as far as I'm going for the time being! There's plenty more DLC left to go, including some insane music choices, the aforementioned novelty hats, fun with Ifrit, actual gameplay!!!, and some more silly flashbacks. If you waited this long for my thoughts and somehow stuck with me this far, let me know your own thoughts on the DLC! I can say with confidence that it is... 100% a thing that I experienced.

I still can't believe there's an anime prologue...

Greetings, highadrenalineexchange participant! My online handle is Gargant, and my AO3 account can be found under the same name (Gargant). I'm an irregular exchange participant myself, but doing Heart Attack Exchange last year was a major highlight for me and I'm really excited to be returning for another round. I hope you're excited too!

I'll clarify right away that I am just as happy to receive artwork as I am written fiction. If you want to take any of these prompts and go the comic route, please feel free! I can't wait to see what you'll come up with c:

I've only requested for three different categories this year: Tales of Symphonia, Final Fantasy XV, and the ever-popular Original Works. If any of the sections of this letter seem particularly weighted in favour of one of those groups, I promise that it isn't intentional. I limited my requests to these three options precisely because they were by far the options that most excited me, and I'll be thrilled with anything these categories inspire from you. Follow your heart!

I have one real DNW, which I have outlined in every subsequent section of this letter and I'm going to mention here as well. The one and only thing I would like to avoid in anything created for me are detailed renditions of modern medical procedures, particularly things like cannula insertion and the administration of intravenous treatments. Thank you for understanding.

With this all being said, here's a list of things I generally vibe with. Use this information however you see fit!
( Rest of the letter can be found under here! )


Whichever pairing you end up writing/drawing for, I really hope you have a lot of fun with this. My letter is here to help guide you or perhaps inspire ideas, but please don't feel obligated to stick super close to anything said here! 10k is a lot to write in such a short time, and comics are always hard work, so please go with whatever gets you excited to hit the keyboard! Just so long as that oft-stated DNW is respected, I honestly don't mind what you decide to create. Just have fun out there, guys! C: