Reading in Review

 Oh dear, this was a sad year for reading. I only read 31 books. I think I might have forgotten to list some, but the truth is that my reading was sorely limited this year, partly because of teaching full time in the spring, partly because of moving, partly because my attention and will are weak, and I watched more movies and scrolled through more media. Should I give myself grace for having weakened in my consumption of good literature? Or should I be honest about my failing and charge myself with the task of applying more self-discipline next year? 

Granted, I dedicated a lot of time to teaching, grading, and planning. Much of my reading was for school, either researching for class, or prepping to teach. My list includes rereads like The Outsiders and The Diary of Anne Frank and Night, which I will miss reading. They deserve regular rereading.  

In addition to the books on rhetoric and public speaking on my list, I also did quite a bit of reading online about teaching these subjects. I spent a lot of time on the American Rhetoric website reading classic speeches, as well as googling around for other good examples of the use and abuse of rhetoric. I read a bit about logic and fallacies.  (But I also spent much too much time on Facebook marketplace reading ads - an interesting study in rhetoric in itself. In the language of the amateur marketer.)

Now that we don't have such a comfortable place for watching tv (our new couch in the basement is not nearly as cushy), I suspect our tv watching will decrease. And I no longer need to scroll Zillow as I did much of the spring nor Facebook marketplace as I did much of the summer and fall nor shop for presents as I did much of December.  So I will have more time to read!

What were the highlights of my reading year?

I am glad I finished The Hunchback of Notre Dame, although I did not enjoy it very much. It was long and wordy, although I appreciated some of the descriptive parts and wish I had read it before our trip to Paris this summer. The characters were flat and static. Very little, if any character development - except to descend further into darkness, as Claude Frollo and his brother Jehan and the soldier Phoebus did. Esmeralda seemed to grow more stupid in her love for Phoebus. Gringoire became more of a caricature. And Esmeralda's mother seemed more insane that wracked by grief. No one seemed to have any interior life or sense of faith. Although the hunchback was the most sympathetic character, and he seemed to have the most virtue of any of the characters, Hugo made his virtue seemed almost more unintentional, like a blind loyalty or innate passion.  But I'm glad I stuck with it as a piece of literary history, and I feel some sense of accomplishment for finishing this classic, even though I found all of the characters disappointing, and none seem to be redeemed by the end of the novel.  Hugo's outlook seems to be similar to Thomas Hobbes' "life is nasty, brutish, and short." While the book was billed as an encomium to the Cathedral de Notre Dame, it made the cathedral seem a dark and foreboding place that hid misdeeds by the misguided and eventually corrupt/evil curate Frollo and a prison more than a place of refuge for Esmeralda and the hunchback. 

One book I enjoyed that was new to me was Giants in the Earth by Ole Rolvaag. This also was a book club pick, and I liked this one better than some of my fellow readers, although I did feel exasperated with the blindness of some of the characters. I always enjoy a story about the hard lives of pioneers on the prairie, though, and this one seemed to be a very true to life account of the harsh aspects of that time and place.  I reread Persuasion for this book club also- can't go wrong with Jane Austen! My brother, who is into online auctions now, bid on a set of 3 Jane Austen editions from the late 1800s- the ended up selling for around $700, so he didn't win the auction, but it shows the love her books deserve. 

My reading of young adult books has also trailed off, although my reading for class the first half of the year, which seems a lifetime ago now, was primarily middle grade fiction. I miss reading aloud with my daughter, a habit we dropped when we moved. She was tiring of listening to Anne Shirley novels, but I would be happy to pick them up again. Perhaps another resolution! I'm sure she'd love if we returned to that habit. We didn't keep the comfy folding papasan chair that I used to sit in to read, but now she has her sister's full bed, so there's plenty of room to cuddle up on a cold winter's eve. I just need to prioritize the practice. I did finish listening to The Hobbit in the car with her, as she was reading it for her 6th grade class, and I always enjoy the dramatized version, which we found on Internet Archive. 

Although my spiritual reading was primarily reflection pieces - I spent a lot of time finding prayers for the season for my class - I did do some reading related to our travels. I read Christy Wilkin's book about Lourdes, but perhaps my favorite spiritual reading was Plough magazine. I included these issues as books because I read each issue, 4 per year, cover to cover. The essays range from historical to theological to cultural and issues include art and poetry and a biography of a holy person. Although published by the Bruderhof, many of the writers are Catholics.  The Winter theme was Beauty and Work was the theme for the fall. It's the one print periodical I'm still subscribing to right now. 

I skimmed through a number of books on rhetoric before starting teaching this fall, and I did actually enjoy my close read of Aristotle's Art of Rhetoric. It is concerned as much with the nature of being human and being moved by emotions, motivated by virtue, and attracted to beauty, as with "rules" rhetoric and logic. Although some sections get bogged down in lists and definitions, it includes a number of observations about human nature that provide for good class discussions, such as what is happiness and what things inspire it? And what are the characteristics of a good life which are worthy of being deliberated? Justice and the characteristics of a government ruled by law are also topics of interest. A lot packed into a short book, and a reminder of how public speaking and writing form the character of our nation.  Although much public discourse is colored by incivility and ad hominem attacks and other fallacies of logic, learning about rhetoric perhaps can resolve some of that divisiveness as ideas are shared and thoughtfully debated.  One of the first books I finished for 2026 is John Duffy's Provocations of Virtue, which considers the rhetoric classroom as a learning lab for practicing ethics through discussion, debate, and learning to communicate ethically. It gave me a lot to think about at the opening of the semester.

Now it's time for me to get back to planning for this semester.  The recognition that my reading was severely diminished this year is a wake up call to dedicate myself more to intellectual discipline - turning off the phone and picking up the book. Of course, the goal isn't a number, but a growth in knowledge, understanding, curiosity, empathy, commitment, imagination, faith, motivation, etc. May the books I read be more than just a competition to best myself. Here's to turning more pages, but also turning over more ideas, in 2026!

From the Indianapolis Museum of Art

Hopes for the New Year

 Happy New Year, everyone!

Nearly two weeks into 2026, and I just learn that Wendell Berry has a new novel out - since October! Joy! How was this not on the top of my Christmas list? How did I miss this?  It's backordered now, but I've reserved a copy. 

Let me tell you, I have been disconnected from news that matters to me for some time. Unfortunately, I hear too much disturbing news on the national and local front, but I haven't kept up with news in arts and culture, or rather, that small niche of arts and culture that appeals to me. 

One of my new year's resolutions is to seek more reliable sources of information for my news of the world and the good, creative people in it - and to avoid social media and its commentators. Although there are real reasons for outrage over the travesty that is American politics, engaging - or even just observing - the outrage on social media is unhealthy, even if outrage is the appropriate response. Of course, social media is a big part of the problem. Although I signed up as a way to keep in touch with family and friends, it has now become a morass of clickbait and advertising, both of which are often false or misleading. 

Additionally, random scrolling has lessened my reading - not just my reading time, but my attention span. I'm just like a teenager! (Other than my gray hair, wrinkles, and saggy body . . .)

Woe! I am often a hypocrite! I tell my students to read real news, but I myself have fallen out of the practice since we moved.  Sadly, this is largely because I let my subscription to the WSJ lapse.  My kids tired of me telling them about something I read in the WSJ.   I don't know if the WSJ would have highlighted a new Wendell Berry book, although they should have. 

What I really miss is going to the library and seeing what's on the "What's New" shelf and picking up the new book review magazines to browse.  So perhaps another resolution - more trips to the library - or at least read more real books.

The library is not far from our house - less than 10 minutes. But my first two visits were not especially pleasant. The layout is rather broken up and not welcoming - the stairs are hidden, the reading rooms are all tucked away in corners, the division of genres is not intuitive - meaning I don't know where the books I typically like (fiction, theology, children's lit, lit crit, books of interest) are.  Also, there are a lot of people who haven't bathed recently using the reading chairs as nap spots. I didn't feel like I could let my 11 year old out of my sight. 

I haven't been back since late summer. Thus, I haven't been keeping up on what's new, although much of it is dregs.

However, thanks to blogs, I now know there is a new Catlett family novel out. I used my Bookshop credit to purchase it, because Wendell Berry would appreciate avoiding Amazon, and avoiding Amazon is another resolution.  This helps with my bigger goal of shopping less in general. We still need some things for the house - the basement and the sunroom remain sparsely furnished, but after Christmas, I need a break from shopping. I finally made all of my returns - almost every time buying something new, unfortunately. The cure is to not go into the shops at all. 

In addition to resolutions to shop less and to read real books and real news more, I'm of course telling myself to eat less, exercise more, worry less, sleep more, write more, pray more, and connect with family and friends more. 

I just need more hours in the day and more will power! Or more grace...

I know I make the same resolutions every year, and I know that I rarely keep them - or I wouldn't have to recommit. I don't even need to look back at last year's resolutions, as I used to sometimes do, because they are always about the same. Nonetheless, I will continue to appreciate the habit of using this time of year to do an examination of conscience for the year - which reminds me that I also need to get to confession. I meant to go the other day, but the line was too long! This was an issue in Texas, too. A good thing for the church, a bad thing for my soul.

So here's to starting over and trying again to be the person we are called to be! And oh, happy failures that remind us of our need to be redeemed! And to the hope that springs anew even in the bleak midwinter that by grace we will someday have that glory.

Christmas Memories

 It's a chilly January morning, nearly the Feast of the Epiphany.  School started today. We just returned from visiting the in-laws in Oklahoma City during the previous week and visiting with college friends and Texas friends (who were in Michigan) over the weekend. The holidays are nearing their end, but we are still celebrating. 

It's been a minute since I blogged - November closed out our college football season of hospitality, much to the dismay of the Notre Dame football fans in our household. (The team was left out of college football playoffs because of some political machinations by the board to allow in more SEC teams. Even I was angered by the slight Notre Dame received by the CFP board.  Our righteous indignation was tempered only by the outpouring of sympathy the team received - although plenty of people who love to hate Notre Dame football were willing to throw salt in the wounds.) 

Although our social calendar no longer revolves around the football schedule, we had a busy December with Christmas celebrations, including a black tie gala at the art museum, probably the highlight, and several other parties. Our own party had to be rescheduled when a last minute trip to Jerusalem came up for my husband. Although he only had 3 days in the Holy City, 2 of which were taken up by meetings, because of the political situation and the season, there were no crowds or lines to enter the holy sites, and he was able to visit the most notable ones - the Church of the Nativity, the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, and the wailing wall. He has promised to take me there the next time he has to go.  

The beginning of December was consumed by end of the year planning and grading, shopping, and travel planning.  Every year I think I am going to be a more efficient grader and just whiz through grades, but it always takes longer than I think, even though this year I was grading speeches and much shorter final essays - which students wrote in class in blue books because AI is ubiquitous. Even if you don't want to use it, it is built into so many applications now. 

I also resolved last year to be a better shopper and just buy the gifts the kids want without wasting time shopping all around. I did that for a couple of things before falling prey to the "I can find a better price elsewhere" mindset. Then I scrolled for hours before running out and buying random gifts instead of the one prized thing.  The gifts were given, and many subsequently were stacked up to be returned.  

But that's getting ahead of the story. The Christmas celebration began with a first birthday party - "One for the books."  My daughter-in-law did such a cute job decorating for a picture book themed party - there were a very hungry caterpillar balloon arch and lots of snacks from Eric Carle's classic, a Chicka chicka boom boom tree where we wrote guest messages, a table with a station for drawing wild things and another station for looking up phases of the moon on our own birthdays.  Books were stacked on the table as decor.  And cookies as a take home gift were set out under a little sign with a picture of Max and an "I"ll eat you up I love you so" message.  Everything was thoughtfully planned. The birthday girl may have been slightly oblivious, but she loved all of the attention after an initial moment of befuddlement when she woke up from a nap to find a  houseful of family and friends waiting to give her birthday hugs. Her favorite gifts were her cute chair from her mom and dad and her little gold shoes from us. She loves shoes! But of course the highlight of the party was just watching her smile and be loved by all her adoring aunts and uncles.

From the bday party we headed to my parents' farm for an early Christmas with my siblings and most of the cousins.  We had a delicious supper of Guinness beef stew, homemade bread, and plenty of laughs. My mom loves to shop at Goodwill, so she gave all of the young people bags of random things she had found over the last few months, but the real gift was a generous check. (Note to self for next year - pick up some fun stocking stuffers, write some checks, and enjoy the time together.)

My one successful gift was waiting for the kids when we all returned to our home in the north - I finally bought everyone matching pajamas, even the baby, even the dog. My husband was not thrilled about this, and I'm sorry to say I did not get a great photo of the whole lot of us. The kids all posed on the stairs, but you can't really see all the pj's.  We should have set one up in front of the tree, but in the hullabaloo, that didn't ever get staged. 

A random mess-up photo, but no one wants their face on the blog anymore.

Those were handed out on Monday evening - a late St. Nick day gift.  For two days we had all the kids home. On Tuesday we went to the farmers' market (not a crowded day), picked up dinner prep items at the Italian market and the meat and cheese shop, and made an Italian feast. The kids gave their secret Santa gifts which were really very thoughtful and generous.  The next day we went ice skating and had a steak flight for dinner so the kids could taste test different types of steak. We ate really well all week.

Our oldest and his family headed home to do Christmas Eve and Christmas day at their house, but my parents came up that afternoon. We attended the Christmas Eve Mass at the basilica which was beautiful and solemn.  It was so crowded we had to sit behind the altar, but we still felt like a part of the celebration. 

After Mass was the traditional toast and some snacky bites, but everyone was tired so they went to bed relatively early - meaning by 1 am. Meanwhile, I was awake several more hours, sorting and wrapping a few things, and fretting over how to make sure the piles were all even. Most of the presents I put in bags. Another resolution - do that part earlier!  It was a short night.  

Even though the kids slept in, they were up before my parents arrived to watch them open a couple presents and to join us for brunch, which was basic breakfast food; just plenty of it. I did not step up my game this year to make any breakfast cakes, as we had lots of cookies and pies left over and the neighbor sent over homemade cinnamon rolls. What a treat! 

After brunch, the weather was mild enough that we could take a stroll around the lakes, which the dog loved. We lit candles at the Grotto and prayed by the outdoor nativity. Then it was back for another big meal for dinner - beef tenderloin, the favorite of the steak flight (which was just small bites for everyone). Christmas evening we all piled up in the basement to watch Christmas movies, a chill evening after a big eating day. 

Although we still need comfy chairs for the basement and a game table - ping pong, pool, or just a table for board games, which we played a lot at my in-laws, - the gathering spaces in our new house worked fairly well for our large group. The living room was crowded but not cramped. The kitchen was full but not overflowing. Everyone found a spot to lounge for the movie (although I have decided our new couch is not as comfortable as I would like - it isn't deep, so it's hard to curl up on). I wanted to light a fire, but my husband wants to get the chimney cleaned first, and a fire might have made the basement too warm.

The Boston contingent headed back east right after Christmas, while we reset to head to OKC.  Our youngest son ended up getting the opportunity for a special work trip and wasn't able to go with us, but we were all happy for his opportunity to travel.  In between the full first week with all the kids and then the second part of the week with the trip to see the in-laws, this seemed an especially long Christmas break -perhaps because we had the two full weeks with Christmas and New Year's near the end of the week. 

Travels to OKC were nearly interrupted by a winter storm - we had snow before Christmas and snow after Christmas, but no snow on Christmas.  We barely made our connection, but because we were flying through Dallas, we could have rented a car, so stress was minimal.  Which is good because now that we live in the land of winter, we will have to deal with inevitable travel delays - or not travel. 

The time in OKC was similarly marked by lots of laughter and good food. This year we stayed at a hotel while our oldest and his family stayed at my in-laws.  Two of my husband's brothers and their families, including his brother who lives in Germany, and one of his sisters also gathered on New Year's Eve to ring in 2026. We moved the "party" back to the hotel and found a conference room where we could sit and talk until we moved to a window to watch the fireworks downtown. The conversations were long and deep and the laughter hearty. My sister and I agreed that the best part was the laughter that may have smoothed some rough edges between the brothers. Differing political views may have created some distance between members of the family, but this holiday week was a good reminder that human relationships can accommodate differences. 

In between laughing together and then feasting on the traditional white meal - pork, sauerkraut, knepp and mashed potatoes (plus green beans) - we were warmed with full stomachs and full hearts. It's always a little hard to return home after a vacation with people you love, but we capped off the week with quick jaunts to Chicago and Marshall, Michigan, where we met up with friends for end of the holiday visits over lunch - more opportunities to strengthen long relationships. 

A great quote on the beams at Schulers, the restaurant where we met up with friends in Marshall, MI. Reminded me of our Coronado house with inspirational quotes on the beams...

Much to be thankful for this holiday season, although it seems awfully quiet this week as our youngest heads back to school and the two college kids still here are sorting their things and working on some projects they wanted to do. Classes start next week for me, so I still have a week to prep - thank goodness - and some time to reflect and reset. I've got some things to work on in the new year -intentions coming soon. But this post is a work of gratitude - a look back at the many blessings that grace this life. 

 

lots of shoes = a full house = lots of love

Settling in

 Flash forward:

Halloween is over and Thanksgiving is right around the corner.  Most of the leaves are on the ground; a few linger, attached to branches that now are mostly bare. Autumn was glorious and brief.  According to the neighbors this was a more vibrant and mild autumn than some in the past, even though we had 12 inches of snow a couple weeks ago. 

Today was partly sunny and mild, in the 50s. The clouds moved quickly across the sky, giving the sun the opportunity to shine warmly between moments of chilly cloud cover. We raked most of the leaves in our yard to the curb last week, where the city picks them up with big vacuum trucks. Easier than I thought it was going to be. We were going to employ a couple of neighbor boys, but we felt pressured to get them to the curb before the vacuum arrived, and the one weekend we asked for help, the boys were visiting family. In between our old rakes and a new leafblower, we cleared the yard relatively quickly. 

I have not photographed/documented this move very much. We don't have cute kids to photograph any more - the 6th grader is happy to pose, but not always happy to have her poses shared. The days go by quickly. Although I still feel like a new comer 4 months into our stay here, I feel at home. I have a job, a book club, a walking friend, and a neighbor friend.  We have loved having our family and friends visit us for football games. We are happy to sit in the living room with cozy blankets and work on homework, grading, reading, watching a show, etc. It will be even cozier when we get a fire going  - an item on my to-do list is to clean the flue. There are still a LOT of things on the to-do list: lights, rugs, chairs, painting, hooks, pictures, etc, remain to be hung/cleaned/purchased.  But we feel settled in. We have most things put away, although some need to be reorganized, and we need to buy rugs and furnishings for the basement - I spend way too much time shopping when I just need to settle on something.  In the past it has been about six months before we felt moved in; it will probably be about that long at least here before our belongings are where they belong.

But today, I was walking home from campus, and I felt at home. We returned from a visit to San Diego last weekend where we reunited with some old friends and spent time with our daughter, and we reminisced about what a charmed life we had led there. But do we want to move back? We love visiting and having a daughter there, and while I do miss our wonderful friends and many aspects of life near the beach and mountains, I don't feel homesick for California. Rather, when we returned here, I felt like I was coming home. I no longer wake up uncertain of where I am.  

Then today we talked for a while at the football game with someone who is moving to Austin - we raved about the people, the trails, the good schools, the low taxes, the warmth,  HEB, .... why did we leave? they wanted to know. The job... but more than the job. The roots. It's hard to explain, but there it is. 

And here we are, feeling like we belong. 

\ 

Chicks from Ladauto Si class - They grow quickly!
 

Visiting campus

 

 

San Diego

Week 3

Albert the Great ready for winter in his new puffer!

What I want to remember about teaching.

I'm still sifting through memories as I catch up to the present. Presently I am teaching again, part time. I have a seminar and a rhetoric class for college students and a "Laudato Si in Practice" class for my middle schoolers.  I had made some notes about what I want to continue to do and what I want to do differently from my time teaching middle school that I'd like to write out as a reminder to myself. 

First, I really need to do a better job of doing what's important now (WIN). My husband attributes the acronym W.I.N. to a motivational speech given by Lou Holtz years ago when he was coaching Notre Dame football. He may have made it up or borrowed it from someone else, I'm not sure, but regardless of the provenance, it is a guideline I should follow more frequently. Even now, here I am blogging when I should be raking leaves. But it's cold out there! It's important that I drink coffee and write NOW before I go back outside!

Ah, there's the difficulty: there are so many important things! But one of the things I learned over the last two years, was to prioritize my time.  I don't know that I did this well, but I was improving. I needed to get to school earlier to start the day before students arrived - that was important, and I did it. I got up earlier, got ready faster, and readjusted the start of my day by 45 minutes. This is a basic teacher practice, but in my time teaching college, it wasn't as pressing. Having my copies made and my first emails of the day answered before students arrived set the tone for the rest of the day.  Then I could stand at my door where I was supposed to be and greet students and converse with them a little. Was I always successful at this?  Absolutely not, usually because I didn't get myself organized the night before. But I kept trying.

So what is the MOST important thing while teaching? Taking care of the people. Taking time to get to know students and to attend their events and to meet with them. Taking time to support my fellow teachers and to greet the people working around campus in all kinds of roles. I tried to be positive and to be present each day - to not check email when students were in the room. To spend the 30 minutes of lunch duty visiting with students, not checking my phone or talking to teachers - unless something was pressing, like a schedule change or upcoming field trip, etc.  And although I didn't always succeed at being bright and chipper, I do think being optimistic was one of my strengths, although not a natural gift.  Our school had experienced some challenges and morale was low when I first started, so one of the things most needed was a can-do, positive attitude. 

Planning ahead was another practice that always set a better tone for the day. My second year was so much easier than my first because I had a better idea of what we could do in a class period, and I had some resources to use. I didn't reuse many of my lesson plans, partly because we were encouraged to write them differently my second year, and also because my original plans needed revision. But I did spend more time focusing on what needed to be done and how much time it might take. I paid more attention to standards of learning and to scheduling the lesson than I did my first year, when we were always running out of time because I didn't move us along when our 15 minutes, or whatever, was up. 

The challenge for planning was that I often didn't plan enough time for planning. Story of my life. I also needed to remember that less is more and not to let perfect be the enemy of the good. (I am full of clicheed aphorisms today.) I not infrequently set myself back by spending way too much time searching online for resources to teach a concept, when I would have been better served by creating a resource myself or just going with one that was fine.  While there are many amazing English content creators online, not everything works, and searching for just the right thing takes precious time better spent grading, or devising an activity that would work for our specific unit.  I loved looking at other resources for inspiration, but in between the specifics of our standards, our text, and our students, I found that creating my own resources was easier than using someone else's. 

I also learned to try to incorporate a choice activity for differentiation and to incorporate more review opportunities, either for openers or closers.  A single lesson was not enough time for most concepts to sink in, and I had to remind myself that even if a concept seems obvious or simple to me doesn't mean that I taught it clearly or that a single day of practice was enough. 

Another lesson: routine is my friend. Monday vocab. Tuesday grammar. Wednesday writing. Thursday reading. Friday review. Patterns making planning easier and help students know what to expect.  Block scheduling was not ideal, but breaking the block into chunks of time helped.

The biggest lesson I learned was to appreciate teachers more. They have a lot of personalities and problems to deal with. They have admin responsibilities, concepts to teach, parent communications, faculty team work, data analysis, grading, planning, managing dramas and materials. So much stuff. It was exhausting, but also exhilarating. I'm glad was I able to spend a couple of years in a classroom, and I miss it a little now - the involvement in students' and colleagues' lives that isn't present in the adjunct position. I don't miss the exhaustion, but I do miss the mission.  I am enjoying the balance I have right now as an adjunct, especially with the work of moving, but I feel a little like an empty nester twice over - my children are grown and my students have graduated.  Moving on to my next mission.

Reflections on moving, from the summer

Now to catch up on our move and relocation. I started this post back in July, shortly after we relocated to South Bend and were living in a condo for six weeks until we could move into our new home - I'll leave it mostly unedited to remember what I was feeling as we prepared to uproot our lives again after the wonderful trip to Europe. So, from July:

******

The past 2 weeks I have felt like a sloth, moving sooo slowly, sitting in one spot much too long. But the two months prior, really 3 - April to June - zoomed by. I was like a mouse or a chipmunk, a speedy rodent racing to survive: scurry, pause, scurry, scurry, pause, scurry, sleep briefly with ears on alert...

So now it's time to reflect: the school year was a success. I received many sweet notes from my 7th and 8th grade students, notes that I have stashed in an envelope somewhere to read again at some point when I am feeling down. By sleeping an average of 5 hours or less for a couple months, I was able to keep up with the nature writing course online that I thought might have been a mistake to say yes to, but I had the best students yet - they were engaged, insightful, and punctual; they turned things in on time. I suspect at least a few, if not many, may have used AI to augment their assignments. I questioned a couple students who referenced works we did not read in class, works that aren't on the reading lists of anyone but specialists. Unlike regular plagiarism, the use of generative technology is difficult to prove, so I asked for references and got a rewrite.  The bonus, if there is one, is that the longer, more complex discussion posts that may have been AI assisted or generated motivated the students who weren't using AI to write more. 

And then I was able to get everything packed, first for our Europe trip and then for the move. We'll see how much is broken. I paid someone to help me pack the kitchen. Unfortunately, I wasn't happy with his performance. The guy's mother-in-law had been recommended by a realtor friend, but she was unavailable and recommended her son-in-law who used to work for a moving company. He seemed to do good work the first day, fine work the second day, but the third day, he didn't bring extra supplies, he was on his phone every time I walked by, and he smelled like pot. I had to repack half the boxes he packed because they wouldn't shut and the pictures inside weren't properly wrapped. Then I found multiple kitchen drawers that he didn't pack, so I was crushed. Lesson learned: Monitor the work, inspect the work and be honest about work that is not up to par.  I didn't inspect his work the last day before I paid him, but I ended up texting him the next morning and letting him know I was dissatisfied. Happily, he was a honest and perhaps repentant soul, so he offered to refund the money for the last hour, since I had to repack.  

Thankfully, I had wonderful neighbors and friends who came to the rescue. I can't believe how helpful they were. They pitched in and wrapped things, took things to the donation center, brought over snacks and drinks, took away some of my condiments and undonatable food I couldn't stand to throw away, although they might have trashed it all, and our dear, handy, neighbor even helped me reconstruct a crate for our marble topped side tables.  Our wonderful neighbors two doors down offered us their home to stay the night before we left since they were off on their summer vacation. Everyone was just so generous. As I write this, I am feeling overcome with gratitude and loneliness. In my exhaustion and manic work mode, I know I didn't thank them properly. 

The move was challenging - I didn't give myself time to sort and pack properly. I cleaned thoroughly as I emptied each room, even renting a steam cleaner for the carpets and touching up paint throughout the house - using small bottles of acrylic craft paint. But I still left the new owners some cash for cleaning the windows and a first clean because I didn't quite leave it as clean as I meant to. In retrospect, I think I probably did a pretty good job scrubbing out 4 years of dust from under beds, etc. Other than not cleaning the windows, I did get most of the work done that I meant to do, including some yard work and getting a drainpipe cleaned out in the back patio. It was full of mud and roots. I hired a company to come and snake it out, but the guys' power snack broke. He got it mostly reamed out, but it still wasn't clear, so I worked at it with a trowel and pike and eventually got it cleaner, to the detriment of my knuckles and nails, which were scraped and knicked from reaching into the front end and the back end of this drainline.  This was purposeful work, but it was also a distraction from the more pressing job of packing up the house.  

Another thing that set back packing was the visit from college daughter's boyfriend in the middle of all this. It was her 19th birthday week, and she promised to really dig in and help, and she did, if he could come to Austin for a few days before we left the city of fun. Although at the time it was stressing me out a little bit to be unable to pack up the kitchen, the visit did provide a moment to look around one more time - we went to the low water crossing with the paddle boards and spent a few hours doing the very quintessential Texas summer thing - a river float. Well, actually a river paddle... but... I can think of several other things I wanted to do before we left - more hikes! more concerts! wineries in Fredericksburg! the Schlitterbahn! Maybe someday we'll come back as tourists and do these things again.  The fun had to come to an end at some point because there was so much to pack. Sometimes you don't realize how much you have until you start pulling it out. Mountains of stuff had to get packed even after downsizing 4 years ago when we moved from California.

Oh, and we attended our godson/nephew's wedding in Houston!  How could I forget! It was a joyful affair and a wonderful opportunity to spend time with extended family in the Southwest before moving on.  And there were a couple swim meets, a couple dinners and luncheons with friends, and a going away party to attend. 

Although it took some near all-nighters, it all got done because it had to. The new owners had to be out of their place and started moving in while we were still cleaning out stuff. I sent multiple loads of junk to Goodwill with the very helpful college daughter, but not enough. I mourn a bag of ND t-shirts that I was saving for my sister-in-law's kids because they love the Irish, but in a moment of rashness I sent that along to the thriftstore, and of all the silly things to be sad about, I keep fearing that a little tee that was my husband's was in the bottom of the bag. I meant to go through it. I also gave a neighbor a booster chair that would've been perfect for our granddaughter, even though the other neighbor's husband lovingly restored it. I felt awful about that. He did such a nice job, but my dear neighbor who always watched our dog really wanted it for her granddaughter.  Quandary! I hope the gift was not seen as a rejection. Meanwhile, I brought along all these bags of odds and ends but left behind things we might have really used. Ah well. It's all just stuff, I keep reminding myself. I meant to go through old boxes of mementoes and whatnot - that will have to be done on the other side.  Or will be done by my children when I die - I really should do that Swedish Death Cleaning practice so they don't have to deal with it all. 

And yet here we are. With the two youngest girls and the dog, we shipped it all off and drove safely north by the grace of God. Packed it all up, sent it with the movers who loaded it on a truck and took it to storage, drove to OKC for a last visit with the grandparents and then to Tulsa for a visit with the cousins, who just moved into a huge new house with a giant yard.  Made me reconsider for a minute what we were doing buying an old house in an historic district with a small yard. Envy is my great weakness.  I also am sorry to be leaving the in-laws. Although the drive to their home was 5-6 hours, depending on Dallas traffic, we were able to see them every couple of months or so. It was psychologically comforting to be closer, especially after my father-in-law's frightening battle with bladder cancer followed by an infection this spring.  We were able to come up and see him immediately, without having to schedule a flight, although my husband did fly from South Bend a couple of times.

From there, it was on to my parents' farm for a couple days because my dear husband was on a work trip in Oregon that at one point I was going to attend. Sigh. I keep wanting to visit that part of the Pacific Northwest. Again, fighting envy is nearly a full time job for me. Although the days under the care of my mother were a respite. Despite being over 50, I still sometimes just want to be with my mom.  I slept in longer than I had slept in a least a year. 

Even so, I am still so weary. For the past couple weeks, I've been lounging around this condo, walking the dog, shopping for couches and rugs, scrolling Facebook marketplace, looking at paint and tiles for a bathroom renovation, trying to stay upbeat for the daughters who are missing their friends when I'm already lonesome for the life we left, even though I never really put deep roots down. It's surprising how even a place that you didn't choose, a place you resist, can claim your heart after time.  I didn't want a big suburban house with a pool, but how we loved that pool in the end! Floating in the lukewarm water in the evening after a 100 degree day, looking up at the dimming sky and the brightening stars and the swooping bats, is a pleasure I don't want to forget.  The brilliantly colored hues, flaming reds and purplish blues, of the wildflowers scattered through the green belt behind us, followed by the big sunny blooms of the cacti, the shaded walk along the creek to the old stone house that consoled a lonesome heart many days, my thriving rosemary and lavender shrubs, the twisting limbs of the live oaks, the warmth of the walking stones on bare feet - but most of all, the generous friendship of people at school, in our neighborhood, at church, our Navy friends: all of it was a grace I did not appreciate enough. And now the ache of the loss and the uncertainty about the future weigh on me, adding to the exhaustion. 

And yet, I am glad to be where we are. There is the relief of getting through all of those hard weeks - the adrenalin rush has ceased. And there is the consolation of seeing God's hand at work. So many things fell into place - getting the job, selling the house, finding a new one, being welcomed by the community here, even getting another teaching job, this time back to part time for the present while we get settled - that it is hard not to feel Providence at work. I am grateful deep down, even though it is hard to find the energy to show it. 

Goodbye, old house!

A nineteenth birthday for a lovely young lady!

Hello, low water crossing! 

Paddling on the river.

A wedding! Blessings to the happy couple!

Enjoying the pool while we can.

One of several donation loads. Why did I get rid of a bookshelf?!

Taking a break to watch my neighbor reconstruct some crates.

The boxes ready to load.

The empty living room. The new owners plan to put in wood floors, something I always wanted to do. But tile is so practical. 

The load in the moving truck.

The load in the vehicle

Goodbye, stuff. The trash. Don't worry; it's all broken and used up. I've got too much of the hoarder in me to throw away something usable. 

My navigator leaning out the window at a red light to fix the top carrier straps.

Time with grandparents

Travel buddy

Baby time at Nana and Pop's

My plants made it! They were transported by our college son, who rented a minivan after the wedding to move back to SB for his summer job. Another piece of the moving jigsaw that fell into place.

Old pillow gifted by a friend. I could probably collect less. 

County fair time!

.. and hello, new house!