Paris: Day One

We left town after Seth got home from work. We were expecting the drive to take about 9 hours, knowing that we have six kids and we would never make it in that time, but hoping that it wouldn't take much longer. The GPS is super bossy and she kept recalculating our route based on traffic conditions. We ended up taking a few detours through some pretty places that were not quicker than a traffic jam. The drive in the dark wasn't very fun, we couldn't see anything, and the toll roads in France were killing us. We knew about them, but we drive a van that is over the 2 meter limit and cost extra at each toll. Ugh. When we finally got there the reception was closed, we knew it would be, and had called ahead to get the access code to the gate. We tried to check in via the kiosk and apparently after Seth paid for the first room the credit card company put a hold on the card so we couldn't pay for the other one. That was after we called before we left to let them know we would be living in Europe for six months. So we all crammed into one hotel room for the night. I think we did Me, Seth and Grace in the queen, Sariah, Ammon and Ada in one twin and Caleb and Arch in the top bunk. Luckily, Seth was able to sort things out in the morning.
Finally we were off to Normandy. We first stopped by the recreational part of the beach where the kids could play a little.

What a great experience it was to go to Omaha Beach at Normandy. It was awesome walking onto American ground and feeling such patriotism. America really is the greatest nation in the world. It was wonderful to learn about the brave  men who sacrificed their all for the greater good of mankind. I learned so much about the war and how critical this battle was and what it really meant in the fight of good and evil. It's astonishing to see what humanity is capable of, both good and bad.

After a somewhat somber visit to Normandy we headed to Mont Saint Michel. This place was amazing also. There is this little island at the very North of France. It has a monastery on the top and a little village around the bottom. You can climb up to the little lookouts and see the ocean or English Channel of whatever body of water it is that surrounds the little island. Okay, technically it's not an island, maybe a peninsula. The kids got a kick out of exploring, but it sure was cold and windy. We found a cute Japanese couple to take our family photo. They agreed if they could take one with us too. So we posed with them. I love that we will be the random American family that had six kids they met in France in their scrapbook.

 Check out Arch's shoes! He found some ground he thought was solid enough to walk on. He was wrong.

Munich

Tuesday was an event filled day. After the kids came home from school we headed to Munich for an appointment at the US Consulate. We needed some closing documents notarized for the sale of our home in Utah. We left a few minutes late and then were stuck behind some slow traffic for a while so we were late. As we pulled up to the building Seth dropped me and the kids off so he could go and find a place to park. I guess he dropped us off behind the building. I was just going to step over the little gate thing that was there but then thought better of if when a man with a machine gun started approaching us. Another guard seemed to materialize out of nowhere and asked if he could help us. I said we had an appointment and he told us we had to use the sidewalk and go to the front of the building. When a guy has a gun, you do what he says. Especially a man in a military uniform with a heavy German accent.
The visit to the Consulate was pretty non-eventful. We signed the papers, but had to pay a pretty penny  for it. $50 a signature. Good thing we only needed four signatures notarized. You can do the math. I told Seth we should send the receipt to the real estate agent and make her reimburse us for it. I  don't know, can you make them do that? For all the money they make off the sale you would think it wouldn't be that big of a deal to her.
Then we needed to find a UPS drop location. Plus a place where we could buy an envelope and some tape so we could put it all together. Luckily we found that all on one street, right where we wanted to go sightseeing. After we found a place to park, we were trying to figure out the parking meter, (We realized we had parked right in front of a sex shop. We tried to keep the kids looking away in another direction.) and as we were loading the kids in the stroller a man that was walking down the sidewalk stopped. He just stood there looking at all the kids. It didn't bother me, until he turned to Seth and said something. Seth is getting pretty good at saying a few things in German and said he didn't understand. So the man said in English, "Little children are the worst kind of people." What??? We shrugged it off and went on our way.
We walked into the old town and saw some pretty cool buildings. The town hall where they have a super old glockenspiel. Too bad me missed the show by about half an hour. We were busy taping a label to an envelope. Then we walked over to a huge church to look around. After we carried the double wide strolled up the stairs we went in to find out they were having a service and there was no looking around. Darn those religious people. Who goes to church at 6:30 on a Tuesday evening anyway?
So we walked around some more. Some kids were tired and wanted to go home. Some kids were hungry and only one kid was actually enjoying herself. I had left the guide book I was so carful to bring with us in the van so we didn't even know where to go next. As we were walking we passed a little nut stand. Yummy. So we got some to share. So much easier than sharing just one ice cream cone.Grace decided she was done with the stroller so she got out. As we were strolling and munching on nuts we were deciding what to do. Our parking meter was about to expire...do we just go home, do we put more money in and stay for dinner? Do we want to eat in downtown Munich which will cost a fortune, do restaurants allow families with six kids in? As we were debating we realized that Grace had wandered off. There was an elevator from the subway by where we were standing and we assumed that she was on the other side, just out of sight. As Seth ran over there and saw that she wasn't there and that she wasn't visible in her little pink coat he started shouting. I was not too worried yet, but I was also trying to keep an eye on all the other kids so we didn't misplace another while we were looking for the first. Seth shouted a few times. I was thinking, "How do we even ask for help? Not everyone speaks English. I don't even know how to call 911!" I guess there were some people that pointed Seth in the direction they saw a crying little girl. So he ran off with Sariah and Arch. As they started running there were a group of "interesting" looking guys, (mohawks, tattoos, chains and piercings) that started running after them. I hoped they were trying to help and not take advantage of a very scary situation. I followed Seth with the stroller and Caleb and Ada. We got to the next little opening and she was still not there. Seth had started off in one direction. A lady approached me. She was holding a phone and I heard her say "kinder" "rosa jacket" and she pointed toward Seth and then said "man leuften" I said in English, did she go that way? At which point she replied in English. "The man ran that way." I asked again, "Did SHE go that way?" I wanted to make sure I was following the child and not the running man who may or may not be following the child. She replied, "Yes, a little blonde girl in a pink jacket. She was crying and running and I tried to stop her but she just kept running." A few seconds later I saw Seth carrying her back toward us. All was okay in the world again. It couldn't have lasted for more than a few minutes but it was terrifying. I have had kids wander off before but not in such a big foreign city. So scary. As I was putting Grace back in the stroller I saw the group of punks give the thumbs up and all head back to the park where they were hanging out. Of  all the people to jump into action it was the least likely, in my eyes. Just goes to show. I felt badly that I had judged them as they were the first to help.
After that fun time we decided we needed to sit down for dinner.
We headed to a brewery and ordered some authentic Bavarian cuisine. I ordered half of some poor old farmer's duck and Seth got the pork knuckle. It was expensive and the kids barely ate. Part way through dinner Ammon knocked Seth's expensive small lemonade (with no free refills) all over his pants and shirt. The old men sitting at the table next to us were playing cards and one of them had a little dog on his lap. Ammon was so excited. He loves dogs. I'm not sure the old guys were comfortable with all our children staring at them. I know I wouldn't be. The servers were kind and patient as we tried to keep our kids in line. After we were done one of the servers asked if all the kids belonged to us. We said yes. He just nodded. I was almost expecting a response like the man on the street gave us, but he just gave me a grin.
We left Munich, made it home about an hour and a half later and crashed into bed.
All the crazy anxiety I should have felt after losing Grace I have felt today. It's been a hard day.

(Sorry about all the typos, it's late and I don't feel like proofreading this thing.)

Salzburg

This trip was a little disappointing to Seth and myself. We must be getting old or something because we wanted to see old buildings like where Mozart was born and where they filmed the Sound of Music 50 years ago. The kids didn't.
We spent most of the beautiful day indoors looking at really cool exhibits. And the kids had a blast. Being a parent is give and take.
The parents give and the kids take.
I do think this was the most fun all the kids have had since we have been here.

They got to look at the inside of some animals with an interesting lift-the-flap display.

 Try skiing.

 Do a wheelchair obstacle coarse.

 Try ski jumping.

 Watch a skeleton ride a bike.

See how big a life size whale heart is next to Papa.

 (With a photo bomb from a random kid.)

 

After the museum we headed outside, after it had cooled off a bit and a few clouds had rolled in, we did get to see some neat things.

 Some random painted cows.

A giant chess board.

 Some old buildings.

 The inside of a beautiful church.

 The outside of a different beautiful church.

And the place where Mozart was born.

 

All in all it was a great day. Salzburg is only an hour drive. It's closer than Munich. So we will probably go back. I am learning why there are peak seasons for traveling. Buildings here are really cool, but the grounds look so barren with all the snow and ice. I would love to see these places in full bloom. On the plus side there weren't that many people to witness our six kids fighting over the one ice cream cone we bought.



Longing or shorting

I live in Germany. I know, that's pretty cool.

But can I complain for a minute?

***Before I start, let me just say, life here is good and I really am enjoying this awesome experience. I have learned so much, unfortunately speaking German is not one of those things.

I miss English. There are plenty of people here that do speak English, for which I am extremely grateful. But little things like reading labels. I was trying to buy some shampoo for my curly hair for a week or so, every time I walked down the shampoo isle I realized I still hadn't looked up the phrase for curly hair. So finally I looked it up and then couldn't find a single bottle with those words. I also bought some gel. I missed that it was for men so my hair has been smelling pretty manly. It's pretty nauseating with the amount I use on my long hair. I do appreciate marketing tactics that use pictures and fonts that are clearly for the target audience. I never realized how much you can tell about a product  by its packaging.

I miss the Utah Indoor Clean Air Act. I don't think smoking inside is legal here, but RIGHT outside the door is. It's only now I realize how spoiled I have been.

I miss sour cream. I miss fruit snacks and graham crackers. (Thanks to my mom who shipped me some.) I miss American size bulk packaging. Gallons of milk and blocks of cheddar cheese. Big refrigerators and my kitchen in which to put all those giant packages.

I miss fountain drinks from the gas station and free refills at restaurants. Diet Pepsi that tastes like real Diet Pepsi. Ice cubes.

I miss wide streets and parking stalls. I miss turning right on a red light. And my automatic
transmission. Street signs I can read. I miss the convenience of stores open 24 hours. And drive-thrus! The bank doesn't have a drive through. UGH! (The McDonald's does, it's called McDrive.)

But the chocolate makes up for it all!

Sprechen sie English?

I haven't learned much German since being here but I have perfected one phrase...Sprechen sie English? Wouldn't you know that the first time I got a "Nein" was at McDonald's.
The few places I go (the store and the school) there are people who speak English. At least I don't have to communicate a bunch. At the store I just buy what looks familiar. Bread looks like bread so I buy it. Fruit looks like fruit so I buy it. Milk, well that's not quite the same. They have what's called H-milch. It doesn't need to be refrigerated until you open it. It's not very good. We learned that one the hard way. Luckily with eight people we can blast through a liter in no time. People will buy H-milch by the case, usually about ten liters at a time. I buy fresh milk by the case. I have received a few looks from the cashiers that seem to say, "I don't know if this stupid American knows this stuff isn't H-milch and won't last." Yet not one has ever mentioned it to me.
There are a few interesting things about the grocery stores here. To get a shopping cart you have to use a one euro coin or a token and put it in a slot that unlocks it. After you are done shopping you have to take the cart back to the front of the store and lock it back up to get your coin back. The store doesn't bag your groceries for you and they don't provide plastic bags for free. They charge 10 cents per bag and have a variety of reusable bags for sale at the checkout, if you need them. So it's a good thing I brought all my reusable shopping bags that I never remembered to take into the store with me when we lived in America, but I am learning to take them in now. The stores also close at 8pm and are closed on Sunday. They expect you to be gone before 8 or they give you really dirty looks. (Which aren't that different from their normal looks.) Luckily, the cashier only says the total and while I still can't understand the numbers when they speak so quickly I can read the screen with the total. Phew! A few things we can't get here, brown sugar, sour cream, and Ranch. I don't love Ranch but I was missing it. Luckily one of Seth's co-workers brought us a few bottles. We tried some "American" salad dressing. I didn't even know there was such a thing. The vinaigrette wasn't what I was expecting either. I also haven't seen sugar in more than a 1 kg package. Really? It almost takes the whole bag just to make a pitcher of KoolAid.

Everything here is small. Here is a picture of our fridge. There isn't even a freezer in it. We have a mini freezer down in the basement along with another fridge that our relocation agent rounded up for us, along with the washer and dryer. They are tiny too. Not used to doing so little laundry at once.
One thing that is not smaller is tiny cars. I didn't know Fiat made a van and that you could get a Smart Car with four doors. It's a good thing that the cars are small because the streets are crazy narrow. There are places that I see people driving that I don't think they should be driving. Also, parking. They just park on the side of the crazy narrow street. Add to that the plowed snow.  Luckily the people are relatively patient. Meaning they don't seem to get road rage and honk their horns, but if you take your time and there is a gap they will take it.
So I may not have learned much German but I have learned quite a bit since I have been here. Unfortunately, it won't be very useful after I leave here. Unless one of you fine readers happens to move to or visit Burghausen. Then I would gladly unload my wealth of knowledge onto you. Wait, I just did...

Hello from Germany

We are here. We have finally recovered from jet lag (I think.) The kids have started school. We got another refrigerator to store all the liters of milk we buy. We go to the store usually everyday. The bread and cheese and milk and chocolate are yummy!!! I was hoping to come here and lose weight. But that's just not going to happen.
Today we headed out on our first excursion. Before we left we had to drive all the way to Austria to get gas. It's quite a bit less expensive there. Good thing it's just across the river. Then it was off to Passau, only about a one hour drive. It is a town where three rivers converge. The Inn, the Ilz and the Danube. We stopped at St. Steven's Cathedral, it has the largest cathedral organ in the world with almost 18,000 pipes. That's about the same number of pipes if you combine the Tabernacle and the Conference Center organs. Unfortunately it was not being played while we were there.
Grace had to go potty so we found the bathroom and there was a lady standing in the bathroom with one euro. She looked at me hopefully. I looked at the stalls and saw that you had to have a fifty cent piece just to get the stall door open. So I gave her some change. She looked relieved. (See what I did there?)

After the church we took a little stroll through town. There are some crazy narrow streets and alleys. Cute little shops and bakeries. We headed to the Glass Museum. It really is just a museum filled with things made of glass. The perfect place to take six kids. Actually they were very good. And it helped that we were the only people in the whole place. I think Passau is more of a summer destination. It looks like it would be lovely without snow. We are definatley going to go back because we ran out of time. There is a fortress there that we only briefly saw. We would like to go to the museum inside but our littles (and me) were kind of tired.

 

Not a bad place to start. I was super happy that we had Seth's phone that works in Germany. The GPS technology is invaluable. Although we need to get a translator app on it. We got a parking ticket because we couldn't read the sign that said we couldn't park there. Oops.

We made it home in time to make some spatzle for dinner. It's the German version of mac n cheese. Today we made it with mozzarella. Again, yummy!



Serenity NOW!!!

I don't even know where to start. It's been a crazy night.

Seth stayed home from work today so he could work the night shift. We had an appointment to feed the sister missionaries at 5:00, (who eats that early?), as we were getting ready for them to come Grace woke up from a nap, I had Ada go open the bedroom door. When Ada returns she informs me Grace had a stinky diaper, decided she wanted to change it herself, made a mess on the carpet and Ada stepped in it. She is washing her feet in the bathroom sink as I was trying to get dinner finished so we can eat when the missionaries arrive. They come, we chat. Half way through dinner Seth has to leave for work, meanwhile Caleb is getting ready for a soccer game, so we send the sisters on their way, I drive Caleb to said game (which is literally around the corner) and return home. The other kids decide they want to go to the soccer game so they can play on the playground. It's a beautiful evening so we decide to walk. The stroller has two flat tires, but that's okay because at the store today I bought Slime to fix them. As I am making a quick repair, Arch decides he wants to ride his bike, Ada wants to ride hers too but it has a flat tire.So I fix that too. Sariah decides on roller-blades. The quick repair turns into us missing the whole soccer game, but I had already promised the kids they could play on the playground, so we still walk to the park. Time to come home, Caleb starts to cry because I didn't bring his bike, Sariah falls hard on her bum, we are stopped by several neighbors to chat. When we finally do get home the kids remind me that I promised them snow-cones. It's much later than I would like it to be, they are never going to get to bed on time. But school's almost out so what the hay! I try to multitask so we read scriptures while eating snow-cones. We are having a nice discussion when Ammon pulls a bar stool over on himself. As I am comforting him his diaper leaks so I go to change him. Still multitasking we are discussing Christ and his roll as the Messiah when Ada (5) looks at Ammon (1) and says, "What is that?"
Like every other time she has asked, I answer frankly, "It's a penis. That's what makes him a boy. You don't have one, that's what make you a girl."
"I know that's a penis, what's under it?"
"It's called scrotum."
"Well, what is it for?"
Then Caleb (7) chimes in, "I don't know! But there are two little balls in it and if you squeeze them it HURTS!"
Everybody is laughing.
Sariah (11) red-faced says, "I didn't need to know that!"
Arch (9) says, "Well, it's true!"
I'm totally ready to end the conversation, and even the scripture discussion and send everyone to bed, but Caleb has a question, "What are the little balls? And why are they there?"
Me: "They are called testicles and they make sperm."
C: "What is sperm?"
Me: "Sperm is what fertilizes the egg."
Ada, who has been involved in conversations about why eggs that we eat for breakfast aren't baby chickens, draws a conclusion, "That's what makes baby chickens?!?!"
Me: "No, no, no! The boy chickens have testicles that make sperm that fertilize the girl chicken eggs."
As Ada is processing this information, the others bombard me with questions so quickly I don't even know who is saying what.
Arch: "So do people girls have eggs?"
C: "Do they lay them like chickens?"
Me: "Yes, girls have eggs. No, they don't lay them like chickens."
C: "Well, if they have eggs, where do they come from?"
Me: "Just like boys have testicles, girls have little balls that are called ovaries. They are inside her body, not on the outside like a boy. They are what make the eggs."
C: "But if they don't lay them what do they do with them?"
Me: "The eggs just stay inside their body."
Then come the golden question, "How does the sperm get to the egg?"
Since I'm completely outnumbered I decide it's time to end the conversation. "You know kids, that's a really great question and we can talk about that another time."
Caleb says, "Fine, then I'll just go ask my teacher tomorrow."
We've come this far. Why not?
Me: "Okay, the sperm has to come out of the boy through a hole."
Caleb points to his bum.
Me: "Nope, wrong hole. What comes out of there?"
Sariah being the wise 5th graded she is says, "Solid waste!"
Me: "Great! Caleb, is there another hole it could come out of?"
He points to his penis at the same time Sariah and Arch are thinking, "How on earth can that hole be used for more than one thing?"
S: "Is sperm liquid waste?"
Me: "Well, it does come out in a liquid."
C: "Ohhhhh, so the girl just drinks it and that's how it gets to the egg?"
Wow!!! Am I really having this conversation? With all six of my kids present? Luckily the two littlest don't understand. On the other hand, if they did understand I wouldn't have to have this conversation ever again.
Sariah is gagging. "Yuck, why would anyone drink something that came out of that hole?"
C: "If the girl doesn't drink it then how does it get to the egg?"
Me: "If the sperm comes out a hole, how do you think it gets in?"
Arch: "Through a hole?"
Me: "Yep."
Caleb points to his bum again.
Me: "Nope, wrong hole again. Girls have another hole that the sperm can go in."
C: "But how does it get from the boy hole to the girl hole?"
"You have to put them together.It's called sex. Have you ever heard of sex before?"
Arch comments, "Ya, but I just thought it meant if you were a boy or a girl. It has more than one meaning, doesn't it?"
Caleb makes a comment about how a girl hole would have to be bigger than a boy hole. I can just imagine him thinking how he might aim toward a girl hole.
Meanwhile, Sariah says, "Well it would have to be bigger if a baby is going to come out."
"It stretches."
"Well, you would know. You are like an expert."
Ada, who is the most 'aware' of all my children giggles, "So you put your hole on Papa's?" Then just busts up.
I'm feeling a little more than awkward at the moment. Everybody is laughing. I'm bright red and I think Sariah scooted away from Arch and said, "Stay away from me!"
In an effort to make this a learning experience I settle everyone down and try to explain that we don't talk about sex with friends or teachers. Not because it's bad but because it's special and private.
Ada, still making connections, "So that's why they are called private parts?"
I asked the kids if they were going to go tell their friends about what we had just talked about. The older ones had a mortified look on their faces. I continued, "We don't need to tell our friends about this. Their parents can tell them when they think they are ready. Sariah, Arch and Caleb all said simultaneously, "ADA!!"
I guess I'll start informing the parents of her friends first.

At this point I sent the kids to bed. As I was giving them kisses and tucking them in I realized that I still hadn't cleaned up the poop off the floor.