New Blog!

Hey friends,

We are now blogging at: http://kcbutlersatimetolaugh.blogspot.com/. C'mon over. :)

Love,

Staner :)

The Butler Family Travel Adventures

Okay.... so we had planned on coming home from North Carolina yesterday afternoon/evening. We went to the airport in Greensboro, NC, went through security, which, let me tell you, is quite a process with a newborn and ALLLLLL the gear that a newborn requires. (Can't believe we did this last year with Hayleigh AND Tali.) We got down to our gate, to find out that our flight to Cincinnati was delayed an hour, which would have put us into Cinci AFTER our flight to KC would have already left. The other flight options we had yesterday would have ultimately put us into KC around 11pm or midnight. No bueno, especially with Isaac. Sooooo..... we called my mom, who turned around and came BACK to the airport, despite the rapidly deteriorating weather conditions in Greensboro (well, deteriorating depending on how you feel about snow.... it was actually VERY beautiful), and rescued us from the airport. So we spent an extra night with my family last night, which was actually a blessing. It was fun.... though we were sad too not to get to worship with our ROCK family this morning.

So.... on to today's adventures. We made it to the airport, through security (AGAIN... such an insane ordeal), and onto our first flight (we connected in Atlanta this time) without a hitch. Isaac did GREAT on the plane.....slept through take off, talked and just "hung out" during most of the flight, and had a bottle during the landing process to help his ears. It was quite perfect. :) Grabbed pizza in the Atlanta airport and got on our NEXT flight.... on which we became.... THAT FAMILY. Yup, the one with the screaming, inconsolable baby. Oh man.... I remember having one flight in the past like this with Tali. SO not fun. :( Poor Isaac was having tummy troubles apparently, because in the first 20 minutes of the flight, amidst all his crying, he had 3 (yes, THREE!) poopy diapers, which we changed with Isaac across Stan's and my laps, (thankfully the other person in our row was very understanding), and spit up (not just a little) multiple times. My poor little buddy. :( Stan and I took turns "bouncing" him (sitting down in our seats, which is quite difficult) till our shoulders were cramping and our arms felt like they might fall off.... Then, finally, about 30 or 40 minutes into the flight, he fell asleep. Whew. He slept through the rest of the 2 hour flight like a champ. It was such a blessing.

And THEN..... oh yes, it gets better.... We get to the Kansas City airport, get off our plane, Stan gets our luggage while I feed Isaac, and he goes and rides the bus waaaayyyy out to the parking lot where our car was parked. As I sat (and sat, and sat) in the terminal waiting for him, Isaac grew fussier and fussier until I was pretty much exhausted and my muscles were cramping again from bouncing and swaying and swinging him and doing anything I could to try to help him feel better and calm down....And in the midst of this, I get the call from Stan: The car won't start. "WHAT!?!?!" Oh man... for REAL?! I was desperate to get home with Isaac....so this was amazing timing. :) Ha. So Stan finds someone in the parking lot to give him a jump....and it STILL won't start. After trying to get a hold of a few friends, we decided it'd be quickest to just take a shuttle home, so we found a shuttle service, loaded our stuff up, and FINALLY came home. Finally. (We left the car at the airport, so we will be going back up there tomorrow, calling AAA, and having the car towed to the dealership to be worked on. Fun times. :) ) And THEN.......

We walk into our house, and it STINKS. Straight up stinkage here. Bleck. Backing up about a week.... Stan had had a dream while we were in NC that we came home and our house reeked and all of the fish (we have tilapia in our basement because Stan has a small aquaponics system down there) were dead. Annnnd.... it really happened. Yup, DEAD FISH. Thankfully we only had 5 or 6 fish down there. Apparently all the water had either evaporated, or there had been a very slow leak that Stan didn't know about.... so yeah. Gross. 'Nuff said.

And in the midst of all of this, as we're airing out our house (despite the fact that it's like 23 degrees outside), unpacking our mountains of luggage, and dealing with dead fish yuckiness, Stan starts telling me how thankful he is. He goes on and on about how he totally sees the goodness of God in all of this stuff, how he sees God's hand providing for us in all these little ways....even IN the events that have been so INCONVENIENT (to put it mildly). So we ended up worshiping together in our room while we unpacked, and I found myself being led by my husband OUT of a place of being kinda bummed out and stressed and overwhelmed, and into a place of peace and gratitude to the Lord. Wow. Such a sweet experience. And when I look back on the last couple days, it's actually kinda funny, everything that's happened. Ha... I think it's kinda cool that I'm only a few hours out from all of this insanity and I can already laugh about it. THAT...is a God thing.

Soooo.... that's our crazy story! We're happy to be home....thankful for a great time with my family... and exhausted too. And I, for one, am going to BED. G'night all. :) God is good.

Another One...(or 2)... Because I Can't Resist

(Photos by Lindsay Cloer)

Wordless...um....Friday Night?

(Thanks to Lindsey Cloer for this photo. http://cloerphotodesign.com/)

Hey everyone! Merry Christmas! So fun to say that. I love this time of year.

I am writing from my parents' house in Greensboro, NC! We were here for Thanksgiving last week and have been able, thanks to Stan's new "work-from-home" status, to stay an extra week (he can work from anywhere that he has internet access)! We will be back in Kansas City this coming Saturday evening.

We have had a wonderful time with family and gotten to spend time with a few friends to boot! It has been a blast getting to introduce my family to Isaac. (My parents were the only family members on my side who'd met him previously.) Here are some pictures from our time together:

Stan and I (and half of Isaac's head) with my Grandma Kiser

Isaac with my cousin Amy

Isaac with Great Grandma and Grandpa

Gigi making Isaac smile :)

Meredith, my brother John's girlfriend

My sis-in-law Paige, and my sweet nephew Will

Stan and I, along with my brothers, had a great time going

through our old toys from when we were kids.

This puppet's name was "Oscar." Why? I dunno. Aaron is imitating Oscar's face.

My youngest brother, "Uncle" John. He fell in love with Isaac.

"The fam" hanging out at my parents' house.

My dad and his brother, my Uncle Larry

We had a dinner to celebrate my birthday (I turned 30 this past Sunday! :) ), along with my Grandpa's, my brother's, and my dad's, all of whose b-days are within a couple weeks of mine.

Isaac and Uncle John again :)

Our entire Thanksgiving crew - my dad's side of the family -

at my cousin's house for Thanksgiving Day.

Isaac, by the way, is growing incredibly quickly... more quickly than I remember Tali growing. He is already filling out his 3-6 month clothes (he will be 3 months December 13.), has outgrown some of his 3-6 mo. onesies..... Crazy. He is so much fun, talking and babbling all the time, just a blast to be with. His reflux/digestive issues are still a struggle but they are more controlled than before, so he has lots of "happy awake" time now. He is enjoying looking at toys, and starting to be able to control his arms and hands enough to touch and even grab (occasionally) them. He loves toys that play music. :) We are in the process of getting him on a routine so that our days have some structure (so that I can actually kind of plan out my life again! :) ) and he is responding WELL! (Yay for Baby Whisperer! http://books.google.com/books?id=Gc0cGZpcfH8C&printsec=frontcover&dq=baby+whisperer+tracy+hogg&source=bl&ots=zeyaL1VNwX&sig=47OAc_2zlrcbBgmOHYGhSE5JBZU&hl=en&ei=iAb4TMKvOMT_lgfwg_GKAg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=7&ved=0CE8Q6AEwBg#v=onepage&q&f=false)

Here are a few recent Isaac pics. :)

Hope you all are enjoying your Christmas season and remembering to slow down and enjoy the things that are really important....and to meditate on the ONE we celebrate during this season.

Love to y'all! (Yes, I'm a southern girl at heart.)

Isaac: The AWAKE Version :)

Annnnnnd, really quickly....

I realized that in all of the pictures of Isaac that I posted last night, he's asleep! So I wanted to post a few AWAKE pictures of him. Here ya go!

Catching Up....

I meant to write this post a good 6 weeks ago.... but time has escaped me for obvious reasons! :) I wanted to post these pictures from when my cousin Chrysti and her new hubby Leon visited us the week before Isaac was born. We had a good time hanging with them and getting to know Leon. They were on a support-raising trip, preparing to return to England where Leon is on staff (and Chrysti soon will be) with Operation Mobilization. It was great to have them with us for a night! :) It was also a blessing because I was too far along in my pregnancy to attend their wedding in August, so I was excited to get to meet Leon even though Stan and I couldn't be there to celebrate with them.

I took Chrysti and Leon up to the top of the Liberty Memorial here in KC. It's an inexpensive, fun way to get a sweet view of the KC metro area.

At the bottom of the memorial.... my VERY pregnant self in the last few days before Isaac decided to show up. :) This picture was taken ON my actual due date.

The newlyweds. :)

Sea Lions, Kangaroos, and Polar Bears! Oh My!

Pardon the cheesy title - I couldn't resist.

This past Saturday we had Tali, and Stan and I decided to take our little crew to the Kansas City Zoo. I haven't decided if we were brave, crazy, or both.... but our adventure that COULD have been semi-disastrous (because Isaac is pretty unpredictable and Tali is still a little extra emotional) actually ended up being a really fun day! Isaac slept the ENTIRE time we were at the zoo... about 4 hours. It was so wonderful... and Tali enjoyed helping Stan push her stroller as much as she enjoyed seeing the animals. :) I think the kangaroos were her favorites - same as last time she and I were there together. She loves to hop, hop, hop like a kangaroo. :)

The new polar bear exhibit at the zoo (new as of this past July) is REALLY cool. The polar bear (Nikita is its name, I think.) is absolutely magnificent.

As a side note, Tali is doing better and better every time we babysit her. (We are keeping her every Saturday while her mom works.) We had her both Saturday AND Sunday this past weekend because her mom worked some overtime. Sunday she successfully NAPPED at our house (she has had a hard time doing that the last few times we've had her). Praise the Lord! Huge breakthrough. She is still more emotional than she was when she lived with us, but getting less so, and more like her normal, happy-go-lucky self every time we see her. She still SPRINTS to us when she sees us, and still cries when she has to go back to her birth mom, which breaks our hearts. Our relationship with her birth mom has improved dramatically and I feel like we've built a good deal of trust with her. We are trying to be supportive of both of them and just be a consistent source of stability and safety for Tali as much as we can. It is still really hard, to be honest.... Our hearts, and our arms, still ache for her every day....we miss her so much. As much as we adore our sweet Isaac, our family feels incomplete without our Tali-bug. We trust that God will continue to heal our hearts, and hers. Hard journey. But He is faithful. And we are thankful to get to still be a part of her life as much as we are now.

Anyway... here are some pictures from our zoo day. In case you're wondering, it's okay for me to post pics of Tali on our blog now. :) Sooo, here ya go!

Stan = Super Dad! He should have a cape! :)

The monkey says, "Ooh ooh, ah ah!"

The polar bear swam right by us! So cool!

The polar bear's habitat is soooo beautiful!

You can see him up on a rock in the background.

Checkin' out the kangaroos. It's so cool because there's nothing separating them from us. They just stay back in their little area somehow. :)

"Push! Push!" (Which translates, "Let me push! I wanna do it!")

The aftermath! :)

More aftermath. We are exhausted! :)

Time is flying...

Wow. It's been a month since I posted last. It feels surreal that Isaac is already over a month old. The last 5 weeks have been full of nights with little to no sleep, trying to figure out breastfeeding (Isaac had some relatively unique issues that now finally seem to be resolving - a huge victory!) which was massively overwhelming for several weeks, trying to get Isaac's skull, spine, etc. back in order after the intensity and trauma of his birth via cranio sacral therapy and chiropractic care, trying to get his acid reflux issues under control with dr. visits, medications, and probiotics.... Need I go on? And in the midst of all of this, trying to REST and RECOVER?!?! Ummm.... yeah. Not so easy. Oh, and 2 weeks ago our church had our annual "Tribal Gathering" where all of our extended spiritual family comes in from various parts of the country for some awesome family play time and encountering the Father's heart together. It was an amazing week..... though not very conducive to rest. :) So worth it though.

So, as I write this, Stan and I are fairly exhausted. Adjusting to having Isaac has been difficult - I'll be honest. Tali was an incredibly EASY baby, and we knew already that we had been spoiled by her.... we just didn't know how much. Isaac's acid reflux and gas issues (hard to tell for sure what's what - but we know he has both going on in a pretty major way) have pain super painful for him and there are lots of times where he just screams and cries inconsolably.... I know other parents have dealt with similar, and even worse, issues in their children but I just have to say - it is SO, SO HARD to watch your child be in lots of pain and not be able to do anything about it. We ask God to heal him, ask Him to take the pain away, we call Isaac's body into divine order in the name of Jesus.....and still he's in pain. I hate it.... and Stan and I have lots of questions for the Lord about why we ask and He doesn't heal and other things along those lines. It has been pretty difficult...

And YET.... on the days when I can push through the fog and exhaustion and unanswered questions and WORSHIP God just because He's worthy, worship Him even when I can't understand His ways or what He's doing or what His purpose is in allowing pain....on THOSE days I can sense His favor, His pleasure, His smile in a way that is so sweet. I've learned this before and am RE-learning it now in a deeper way than before: It touches and blesses God's heart in a unique way when we choose to worship Him in the midst of suffering that we can't understand. When we say like Job did, "Though You slay me, I will trust You," (Job 13:15) we encounter His grace that enables us to keep walking and keep learning to trust Him more deeply.

Anyway.... not every day is like that for me. Some days are just plain hard and I don't do a good job maintaining that perspective. But I know that this is the invitation that Jesus has for me in this season....and my heart's desire is to say yes to Him.

In the midst of all of the difficult moments, we have had lots of moments also of really enjoying our sweet boy.... Oh my GOODNESS his cuteness MELTS my little heart! :) I am blown away by how much I love him and how he already has my heart wrapped around his little finger. :) He is such a sweet, sweet baby. He is starting to smile at us a little bit, usually much too briefly to even think about snapping a picture, so you'll have to wait for "smile" pics. However, here are a few pictures from the last few weeks. He is growing and changing so much! How time is already FLYING! (Sorry these are blurry - most of them are cell phone shots.)

Going home from the hospital!

Tali has grown more interested in Isaac every time she's come over. More on our bug and how she's doing in the next post.

I love my Moby Wrap! (http://www.mobywrap.com/)

WHY is this picture so huge?! and WHY did my text suddenly become blue and underlined?!?! Augh! Technology!

Soooo, What Happened?! (Isaac's Birth Story)

Hi friends! Sorry it's taken me several days to get this update published. Our world has been turned upside down -- in the BEST of ways, but upside down nonetheless! :)

We now have our sweet baby boy, who I am now able to hold in my ARMS instead of my belly! Finally! :) Isaac Patrick arrived Monday morning, 9/13/10, at 9:39 am. He weighed in at 7 lbs, 12.9 oz and is 19 & 1/2 in. long. We had quite an intense labor/delivery experience, which I will try to explain here. "TRY" being the key word. :) There are a lot of details, I'm sure, that I don't remember.

Our plan from the beginning was to have a home birth, in the water. I have believed firmly in home birth (not that some pregnancies don't require hospital births, but I believe that most healthy women with normal pregnancies should be able to deliver at home if they choose. I'll save my home birth soap box for another time. :) ) for about 10 years, ever since I was present at the home birth of my friend Andrea's son Josiah in 2001.

Anyway, so we planned a home water birth, interviewed and "enlisted" our midwives, Suzanne and Sarah, and went ahead with all of our prenatal care taking place in our home. It was wonderful. Sarah and Suzanne have done an amazing job taking care of us, teaching and coaching us, etc.

Saturday night the 11th, I went into labor around 5pm, with contractions becoming more regular and intense around 7:30 pm. We *TRIED* to sleep that night, with me having to get out of bed every time I had a contraction, stand up to breathe and work through it, then getting back in bed and waiting for the next one.... this continued all night, and then around 5:30am we decided we really needed some support so Sarah, our doula (who is nearly finished with her own midwifery training) went ahead and came over. Soon after, I was in the water birth pool in our living room and, with the help of Sarah, Stan, and our friend Camilla, focused on breathing through my contractions, which by that point were becoming very, very intense.

At some point that morning Suzanne came over also....AND my mom arrived via plane from North Carolina (thanks to Tracy for picking her up from the airport!!), and from then on things are really a blur to me. I remember standing outside on the front porch with Stan sometime Sunday morning and working through several contractions out there, with Stan holding me up and me virtually hanging on him through the contractions. It was a gorgeous morning.... I remember the morning air feeling really refreshing to me. I was already pretty exhausted. I remember being in and out of the water during the day on Sunday, just trying to find positions that would help me cope with the pain. I remember laboring on the birth ball (like an exercise ball) for a while, kinda on my knees with my upper body hanging over the ball. Our midwives had me try all kinds of different positions... I had no idea you could labor in so many positions.

At some point I took them up on their offer of a medication for pain that lasted about 2 hours and allowed me to sleep between contractions.... but only between them. Stan and I went to bed and during the contractions, which by this point were agonizing, he would push on my hips to take some of the pressure off of my pelvis....and between contractions we slept.

Sometime Sunday evening I remember asking our midwives if I was in a normal amount of pain for a first time mom...or if what I was experiencing was abnormal. They said it seemed to them like my contractions were more painful than they are for other first time moms.

I won't go into all the details of the next several hours (for the sake of anyone who is of the male gender who might be reading. :) ), but suffice it to say we tried several different things to get my body to continue progressing, dilating, etc....to bring me to a point where I could push the baby out.....and push I did, though without much success. It was by far the worst pain I have ever dreamed I could live through. Holy cow. But I had such a phenomenal support system around me (Stan, Suzanne, Sarah, my mom, Camilla, and Tracy), and the grace of God really carried me through those few hours. But WOW, it hurt. Sometime around 3am, they checked me and I had REgressed dilation-wise, but was still in absolute agony with every contraction. At that point I knew I was at the end of what I could handle and still have anything left in me to be able to push....and so.....

I had this inner conversation with the Lord about going to the hospital. I have believed so firmly in home birth, and there are things about giving birth in the hospital that I really did not want Isaac or myself to be subjected to. So it really tore at me to have to consider transferring. However, I felt the Lord challenge me, basically speaking to my heart, "You have to trust Me and LET GO." So I did. It was so hard for me.... Wow, I'm almost in tears as I write over how hard it was for me to "give in" and go to the hospital.

Anyway...so a little after 3am Monday morning we quickly packed a few things and our whole crew drove to Shawnee Mission Med Center. The car ride was horrible for me... I was stuck at 9 centimeters.... and the pain was just insane. We anticipated a looooonnng wait before I would be able to receive an epidural so that I could rest in order to have any strength at all to push. BUT.... our midwife Suzanne had gone ahead of us and by the time we got there, there was a wheelchair waiting for me. They rushed me PAST the front desk where they normally stop you and make you fill out all kinds of paperwork....straight into Labor and Delivery. It turned out that Isaac was facing the wrong direction as he tried to come through the birth canal, which apparently was the cause of some of the extra pain during my contractions. He hadn't BEEN positioned wrongly, but had done a ton of moving around during my labor (the OTHER cause of the extra intensity) and had somehow gotten himself turned around. The L & D nurses were absolutely great...I got my epidural in what seemed like maybe only a half an hour, and at that point was ready to go to SLEEP....which I did. I don't know how long I was asleep, but it was the BEST thing in the world. While I slept I dilated to 10 cm (finally!!!) and around 7:30 Monday morning I was ready to push....and push....and push....for about 2 hours. Whew. FINALLY, at 9:39 Monday morning, Isaac was born with the help of a vacuum (only took one push with the vacuum, for which I was so thankful, since I HATED the idea of Isaac's head being "sucked on" by a vacuum).


As I lay in the hospital bed after he was born, I watched Isaac while the nurses toweled him off and suctioned him out. He was beautiful. I remember thinking, "If we were at home, he'd be in my arms right now." The thought tore at my heart. It may have been the longest 15 minutes of my life, waiting to hold my son, knowing I was missing out on precious bonding time with him. Finally, they placed him in my arms. He was so perfect. I couldn't believe he was finally here....


I'll go ahead and stop for now, and try to write another post in the next few days to bring you up to the present. I wanted to go ahead and get this out there so our friends can know our birth story. It was definitely the most intense 38 hours of my entire life, but Isaac is so, so worth it. He is amazing and we are falling madly in love with him. :) More to come.