Ask Dr. Wrong

Frequently Misanswered Questions:
Are you people for real?
Yes. Each member of Doctor Wrong Global Enterprise, ISP, Bait and Tackle (collectively known as Team Wrong) has been tested and found to be composed of three-dimensional matter.

Is this a cult or something?
We are from the cult of glorbflutzen, sent by our high priestess to your planet to verify your compliance with galactic law. No.

How can I be sure the answers I receive are actually wrong?
Team Wrong strives to give each customer the wrongest answer possible. Not just incorrect, but truly wrong. Should you ever receive an answer containing any accuracy, veracity, credibility or correctness, we will refund your money plus 20%! *

Is Dr. Wrong actually a doctor?
We attempt to charge outrageous fees. Does that count?

How can I contact Dr. Wrong privately?
Go to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, Washington DC 20500. The gate's broken, so just come through the fence. Wave your arms and shout; Dr. Wrong will come out to answer your question personally. (Speaking Arabic will get you extra points - that really turns her on!)

Where is this 'Any' key that everyone keeps telling me to press?
'Any key' is actually a reference to the mystical Egyptian symbol known as the 'Ankh'. Every computer running Windows has this symbol hidden somewhere inside. You need to find this symbol and press it. It will be hidden very well, so look everywhere. Take the computer apart if necessary. It may be very small so look in all the corners and pull out all the detachable pieces to make sure it isn't hidden behind them. If you still can't find it, call Microsoft.

*this guarantee only applies to customers who have paid us nothing.