New Year's Eve

Every year my whole family goes to my great-aunt Kim's place for Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve. We come from about a 2-hour radius -- Aunt Kim's kids and their kids, then my grandma, her kids, and their kids. The rule is, once you're in college you can come. It's wild, crazy, and mildly embarrassing ... but it's a BIG deal. We had so much fun this year. We order chinese food, play bunco for two hours or so before the ball drops, go wild with streamers and poppers and all manner of other mess-making gimmicks, clean it all up, and play mafia for another two or three hours after that. The games are always the same, the food is always the same, but somehow the stories are always different. When my dad and his brothers and cousins get together anything can happen. This year was the first year Shauna was old enough to go, so that was fun. We brought Chiara, but she slept in the spare bedroom the whole time ... until Daddy joined her at around 1:00am. :)

A few minutes before midnight ... and already WAY past our bedtime. :)

 

 Shauna, I apologize for including this picture. But I loved it. :)

 Bryce and Haley ... and Everett's in there somewhere.

Mom and Dad ... and Bryce in the background.

 

Cousins with Grandma.

 

Next year wherever Eldon and I are, we've decided to sleep through the New Year celebration. Parents of a toddler need their SLEEP! We should have taken pictures of our faces the next morning ... that would have been the real story. :)

A Very Lowder Christmas

I loved loved LOVED being home for Christmas. This is the first time we've all been together during the holidays since before Kev's mission. Our traditional morning festivities took like 8 bazillion times longer than usual, mostly I think because we were all to happy to be together. And out of the goodness of my heart, I did not wake Shauna up by jumping on her bed at 5:00am ... though it would have been just retaliation. :)

Christmas breakfast -- biscuits and gravy (which was a blessed and inspired change from the traditional cinnamon rolls ... you should only ingest so much sugar in the space of two calendar days).

 

 

 

Story: Eldon gave Kevin (who is also pre-med) a bag of textbooks he knew Kevin would need. He "wrapped" them in a plastic bag because he heard that's how Kev wrapped our presents for years. That cracked all of us up.

The gratitude ... or the commiseration of needing such textbooks.

My parents found Haley pirate slippers ... she has a pirate fetish of sorts.

Yes, Bryce and Haley gave Shauna a pillowcase with David Archuleta's face printed on it. HILARIOUS!

Bryce and Haley made Kev a thumb wrestling mat -- complete with mini leotards (sorry, Kev, I know that's not really what they're called) they made out of those plastic sheathes you can buy for finger injuries.

A little something for baby Everett, who is due on Chiara's birthday. :)

Our little thugs in their BYU paraphernalia.

And of course, the little lamb, who slept through most of the festivities. She'd never seen so much cool stuff in one place in her life. :)

It was a great day. I'm so grateful for family, and for MY family. If our children can love each other the way my siblings love each other I can die a happy woman. It wasn't the gifts themselves, of course, but the thought behind the gifts and the love and consideration they showed that made the day so great. I think heaven will be being surrounded by people who know you REALLY well and (still) love you unconditionally. It's the best.

The Snyder family took pictures as they drove ... and drove ... and drove ... and drove

We decided to move to California before the holidays, so on December 22 we drove our little 2001 Honda Civic and a HUGE moving truck over the mountains and into Concord. My goodness, what a terrible ordeal.

The day beforehand was the worst, though, because Eldon and I packed up, loaded, and cleaned our entire apartment 90% just the two of us. Yes, I carried couches and bookshelves and desks (etc) because I'm so, so buff. I cried a couple times, but mostly just because I was still so tired from my shift the night before. Eldon was amazing, and by the end of the night we were so grateful to be done. My dad flew in that night so he could help drive the truck the next day (and by help I mean drive the truck the whole time by himself so I could stay in the backseat of the car attending to Chiara). The pass was so snowy and awful coming back that we actually stayed in Circus Circus overnight and drove the rest of the way the next day. SUCH a good plan, because it lessened the stress and gave Chiara a break from the car. She was a little angel traveler, though.

 We took this picture of ourselves in the hotel lobby.

I know, wow. I don't want to talk about it. :)

The important thing is that we got home safe. The next day we unloaded all our stuff -- having a child increases your "stuff" by about 200% -- and took the truck back. Eldon followed me in the car (I wanted to drive the truck because I'm classy and feminine) and I lost him because, according to Eldon, I was driving "like a bat out of ... somewhere." What can I say? Yes, I took pictures:

Eldon and I will never, ever do that again Holiday moves are too hectic. But thanks to my dad we pulled it off. Yay for Dad!! :)

Some last pictures before we go ...

Mary came to visit us before we move ... GOSH I love her. We were roommates in college - ages ago - and we'll be friends until we're old and gray and can hardly hear or see. She's such a blessing in my life.

A Christmas photo shoot ... Chiara was much more interested in the light reflector than the photographer, so we were hard pressed to get her looking the right way. :) My friend Jenni who took the pictures kept calling Chiara's name but I was thinking she should try to call things like Precious Lamb, Angel Sweet, and Honey Love because we never actually call her Chiara ... she might not know her name yet. :)

And here's one of Chiara just for fun. She is getting around so well these days ... crawling, climbing up stairs,  walking along the edges of couches and coffee tables ... She is quite the mobile little lady. I love her curiosity and the fact that she loves to chat all day long. I wonder where she gets that. :)

Heavy eyelids

For those of you who don't already know, Eldon and I are moving to California next week. His last final (of his undergrad career!!) is tomorrow morning, and it's a doozy. So I've been working by night, packing by day, and trying to keep my wits about me ... and keep them pleasant. :) This morning I literally turned on cartoons, put Chiara in her bouncy chair, and laid on the couch for a good half hour before moving on with the rest of my day. It made me feel like a stellar mother, but it couldn't be helped. Not without death, anyway.

I recently read (as in two days ago) Impossible by Nancy Werlin. I loved it. It's so fun for me to read YA fiction sometimes ... I love faerie tales and myths and folklore. This story took the song "Scarborough Fair" and gave its history as a family curse with three impossible tasks to complete to be free.

You know what bothers me, though? I don't like how they glorify the hero figures in books and movies. I know I'm not going to explain myself well on this idea, because it's 3am among a plethora of other reasons, but I want to try. Men are wonderful. They make our lives complete and fill our hearts with joy and desire and hope. They have varied but often predictable strengths ... like fixing things, logical thinking, determination, thick skin, etc etc. What I don't really appreciate about current publications is that these big strong men are portrayed to be so sensitive, perceptive, observant, intuitive, nurturing, and soft. Please don't misunderstand, I don't think those are bad characteristics. And I love Eldon's sensitive gentleness. But I didn't marry him because he's sensitive and gentle - though it was a perk. I just don't think it's his greatest strength. And while the heros in books fill the pages with knowing looks, furrowed-brow compassion, and superhuman almost-mind-reading capacities to know their significant others' emotional needs, is that why we need men? I say no. We have girlfriends for that. What we need from men is for them to be MEN.

I want to read about how he's getting good grades so he can further his education or get a good job. I want to read about how he works so hard he was promoted. I want to read about how he loves kids, his own or not, and teaches them to fish or helps them with their homework. I want to read about how he sacrifices his own comfort or preference for the good of his family. I want to read about his ability to be the rock, the anchor of his home. He can be sensitive and soft-spoken and endlessly patient too ... those are good things. But his first responsibility is to be all the things his companion isn't, to do the things she doesn't do.

In short, or maybe not so short, I wish we'd glorify men for the things that make them men. Our roles are so beautifully different. I worry sometimes that with all the talk about masculizing women we overlook how much we're feminizing men. Please don't misunderstand me and think I'm saying men shouldn't be sensitive etc. Of course they should. I pray to a very, very sensitive Father. But the best thing about being married to a man is that he's tough and capable and determined to fight to provide for his family. The best thing is that he brings a different perspective to problem solving. The best thing is that he's not a woman! Sometimes in books and movies the best thing seems to be how womanly he can be ... and I don't care for that.

Maybe I'm too tired for this to make sense to anyone but me. I may read this after a few hours' rest and be confused myself. :) Thanks for keeping me company while I try to keep my eyes open.

No one told me! (revised with Eldon's input)

There is a typo in my header, and I've been staring at it helplessly from my desk at work. I can't believe no one told me about that. Yes I can. You probably didn't notice. Or if you did it wasn't a big deal to you. Congratulations, you're all normal.

"Oooh, I can't stand people ... " :)

I had the BEST day today - other than the typo realization. I cleaned, I made dinner, I did the dishes after dinner, I fed Chiara solids - carrots, yum! - like a responsible mother, I showered, I put on jeans (I know ... woah), I did laundry, I gave the FHE lesson, I did a little reading, and now I'm about to go home from work. Life is good. And Eldon, my analytical, scientifically-minded husband, commented before I left for work tonight that I seemed happy today.

"How can you tell I was happier today, Honey?" I asked him.
"You cleaned and cooked." he answered - hesitantly, because he knows what's good for him.
"What do you mean I cleaned and cooked?" In hindsight, not the most articulate, effective question.
"You know, you usually only clean and cook when you're happy."
I pause here, because the wheels in my head are spinning too fast to speak yet.
"So," I begin, "You're telling me that that's why it's so important to you that I cook and clean? Because it's evidence to you that I'm happy?"
"Well, yeah, Shell."
Another pause.
"I never would have thought you'd pick up on that."
"Give me enough observations and even I will pick up on emotional things." he replied, laughing.
"Hmm." ... was all I could come up with in the moment.

I never knew. Communication does wonders. What a darling man I married. Eldon are you reading this? I'm so in love with you!!

Blah blah blah

It's day #2 of playing with my scrapbook stuff. How have I never thought of this before?? :) Note that the bag of scraps is tied shut this time ... And no, she's not wearing the exact same outfit two days in a row. Yes she is. Those are super warm pants, so unless they get poopy dirty or something, I let her wear them as long as they last. :) The hair is WAY sticky uppy this morning, too. Love that. I'm trying to get three baby albums done before Christmas, so the table is definitely not going to stay that clear. I've been thinking about going digital with my scrapbooking efforts. Do any of you do digital scrapbooking? Eldon and I are going to have to get a new computer soon because this one is about to crash, and we're planning on getting a Mac because all of my hobbies have more potential with Apple software. We also want to invest in a great camera one of these days, because having beautiful, clear pictures of our children is one of the most important, lasting investments we want to make. And if I do digital scrapbooking I can do quicker, easier layouts without making a mess! Gotta love that. Last night after Chiara went to bed we sat on the couch and watched videos of her from the NICU and her first few months at home. That was so fun for us. It's amazing how quickly your kids grow, and you wonder how you never noticed how big they'd gotten. We're in size 3 diapers because she weighs almost 18 pounds now. Sheesh. Nine months old ...

It kind of breaks my heart, to be honest. Soon she's going to be talking and going to Kindergarten and growing into her independence. On the other hand, I can't wait to see who she becomes, either.

One mommy's junk ...

... is another baby's treasure! Chiara loved playing with my scrapbooking scraps this morning. It was so darling. Until she started ingesting the paper. Not chewing. Ingesting. She'd swallowed a little chunk of pink paper before I realized what was happening. Mother of the Year award to me.

I've been letting her roam the house free lately - due to Eldon's insistance that 1) she enjoys it, and 2) she needs it. Okay. I'll let her wander as she wants. She stood there under my scrapbooking table for a good 20 minutes just playing with my throwaway scraps. Every now and then she'd turn to me and smile with delight before resuming her exploration of new, previously forbidden things. How did she get this big? My goodness. I know she looks like a scraggle-muffin but I love her nap hair ... how it sticks up everywhere and falls haphazardly over her forehead. She is just the sweetest thing.

bloggers annonymous

I've become obsessed with my blogs. Truly. I spend more time and energy designing and organizing them than almost any other recreational activity. Granted, I do it from work between phone calls, but it's still unacceptable.

I'm not going to do that anymore. I'm going to put in a picture for the header on this one and leave it. No playing with html code, no google searching new background sites, no playing with paint.net (a fantastic application, if you don't know about it), and NO searching for color palettes on Colourlovers. None. Oh, and you know what else I did on this thing? Only roommates and close family members will have already assumed this about me, but I edited every single picture on my sidebar to be the same width because it drove me crazy to see them all uneven. Seriously. I have to get over that. And other things.

(Quick aside: At the bank today I deposited a check for $38.99. I literally handed the lady a penny so the deposit would be an even amount. And then I literally fidgeted in my chair, reeling with regret that I didn't give her $1.01. I'm not even making this up ... it's a problem.)

I also decided that by calling this Eldon and Shelli's blog I was being unwittingly deceitful. Eldon doesn't exactly contribute to this blog. He doesn't even always read it. So it's my blog. That's all.

So, what am I going to do with my time instead of OCD blogging? I'm going to read. I miss reading. There was a time in my life when I read a book every few days, quickly becoming 10 and more a month. Yes, I had (past tense) a blog where I wrote book reviews. Isn't that ironic? I imported it into my journal blog. Along with my scripture study blog, my running blog, my creative writing blog, and my mommy blog. :) Now I'm all streamlined and ready to release my mouse and grasp my mortal probation with both hands. For the love.

Happy birthday, Eldon!

My husband is 24 today. What was I doing when I turned 24? I was single at BYU, and fully anticipating that I'd remain that way forever. I was planning on going to nursing school after graduation so I could work hard for the next two decades, retire early, and adopt a baby. :) I'd met Eldon, but I don't think we'd had enough of a conversation for me to be interested in him yet. He was just the kid who sat next to me and wore dress clothes to class every day (he had a ballroom dance class right before Italian class). Oh, how things change.

We went to Children of Eden this afternoon for our date segment of the birthday. That is such a fantastic show. BYU always does well with musicals, but I was floored by the talent in this one. I wanted to be Eve from the moment I heard her first note. My gosh. It made me miss performing so much I almost cried. Well, I did cry, but it was due to what I was learning and feeling during the show. There was a roundtable after the performance for people to ask questions to the producers / directors about thematic interpretations and content. Eldon leaned over to me and said, "That's for the uppity Mormons who had problems with the false doctrine." Yes, there will always be those. I thought it was great. Another interpretaion of Bible stories just teaches me more in principle, it doesn't threaten what I already know in my heart to be true. Good for BYU for doing the show knowing there would be objection, and then offering an outlet for that frustration to be satisfied.

My favorite part of the show was watching Eldon's face in the dim lighting as he took in the performances. When a soloist was particularly good I looked over at him just to see his smile. When he 18 he played the part of God at a junior college production of Children of Eden. Lots of people don't know that Eldon was offered a full-ride scholarship to study vocal performance at Northern Arizona University, which has the best music program in the state by far. But he made the decision to leave his passion for music behind and pursue a secular career. As I watched him today, though,  I could see how much he misses it. I'll always appreciate the sacrifice he made to offer his future family the kind of security and lifestyle atmosphere he wanted us to have. It's a hard thing to give up such a huge part of your heart. Now he sings lullabies to Chiara ... and sometimes I listen to him from the next room with tears in my eyes. Last year we went to Aida. Going to a musical on his birthday will be a yearly tradition.

(After nearly 30 minutes of trying to edit the picture so it looks like we're the same distance from the camera and I'm not a big white snow beast I give up. I don't know how to do it. Grr.)

It has been a good day. I love you, Honey, and I love being your wife. You have used the last 24 years to become a truly magnificent person. I'm so honored to get to share your journey with you. You have my heart.

Peace and Blessings

Don't watch it if you're going to judge me.

But if you promise to still love me you can watch it. :)

Comfort food

For the love. I've been dragging my spirit on the ground behind me for a week, and I broke down tonight and made myself a lemon tart. I plan on consuming the entire thing before church tomorrow.

There is something poisonous about self pity. I always knew that, but I've never been so sorely tempted by it than recently. I feel like I'm surrounded by other people's sob stories. And rather than be compassionate and kind about it I roll my internal eyes and think, "I'll raise you a night shift and a teething child." That is not the kind of woman I want to be. But it's the kind self pity has made me.

I love the story of Sarai. She was barren for so long, and in a moment of heartbreaking selflessness gave Abram a chance to have a son. But soon that act of selflessness became a burden greater than she thought she could bear. I can relate with that. I often repent my good deeds after the spirit that moved me to such action is drowned out again by my own weakness. What gives me hope is that a few pages and a few mistakes later she becomes Sarah, a woman worthy of emulation, joint-recipient of the covenant of Abraham. Sarai was always Sarah ... The Lord just had to prove it to her first.

So here I am, in a less-than-ideal season of my character. But I have every confidence that if I keep moving my feet toward my Savior He will rescue my heart from the hold of its own weakness. In the meantime, I'm going to eat my lemon tart.

The name is Bah. James Bah.

Eldon and I found this on a friend's blog and we can't stop watching it, or laughing about it. Enjoy!

For you, Baby ... I'm so that.

Picture the two of us in the kitchen. I'm getting a hot, homemade, totally from scratch pizza out of the oven because I'm a domestic goddess of biblical proportions. Eldon is watching from the doorway.

"It smells so good, Honey." Eldon tells me.
"Thanks, Love. Did you see that I did all the dishes too?" (That's usually, and I believe rightfully, his job.)
"I did see that. I'm so proud of you."
I stop what I'm doing to give him a none-too-pleased look.
"Proud is the wrong emotion here. Happy is fine, grateful is better." I say.
"Oh. I'm ... happy for you. For me. Grateful for me. I'm ... just ... Whatever you want, that's what I am."
By the end of his sentence I'm shaking my head and laughing. He's just so dang adorable. Then he comes up behind me, wraps his arms around my waist, and in a voice that is completely out of character for him he says, "For you Baby, I'm so that."
I just about wet my pants. Who is this man?

"Look what I can do!"

How did this happen? No way do I have a child old enough for this. I took this video last Friday and since then Chiara has applied her new skill to every single thing / person she can get a hold of. She's fallen multiple times, but I can't see a way to save her from that short of nailing her toes to the floor. :) Oh we-ll!

P.S. I graduated from college

Because I could still hardly walk when the graduations were happening in April I decided not to do the whole ceremony thing. I sat in my tiny, beautiful apartment with my tiny, beautiful new baby and I was completely content. BYU mailed me my diploma about a month later and it's sitting in our filing folder, congratulating itself in the darkness. So be it.

So on Sunday my cousin Kristen (who is darling and fabulous and amazing, etc) took some faux pictures of me for my mom and grandma. :) She graduated at the same time (yes, she's like three years younger than me ... shush) so I donned her robes and tried to look like it wasn't totally old news that I graduated from college. :) Because my grandma reads my blog, and my mom will get the pictures the fastest this way, I'll post some here while I'm getting hard copies sent to them.

The obligatory solo shot. Let's get that over with first.

 

My face: "I hope she's smiling." Chiara's face: "I hate this."

See the symbolism here? Huh, huh? 

 

Chiara was not a fan of this activity and needed a little reassuring. Poor babe.

 

There you have it. And despite the fact that my otherwise-darling husband teases me that English is a fake major and that they should do away with it, I am quite pleased with my choice. There are few majors you can admit to and receive such a high assumption rate as English. People think I must be able to do one or more of any of the following things:

• correct any sentence, citing references to grammar or vocabulary usage authorities
• edit any paper
• define any word
• spell any word
  
• recall every book ever written
• read every book ever written
• write a rockin' document of endless variety
  

You get the idea. I've seriously and honestly gotten full-time job offers at companies I've worked for on a temporary basis simply because they liked me and my major was English. It's hilarious to me. So my theory is, I got the most bang for my buck of any other undergraduate degree that can sit on a shelf and not rot away. Other things get outdated or need recertification; English never goes bad. My major is the twinky of majors.

When reading disappoints

I love Shannon Hale. I've read her YA fiction, and I've gone through the Bayern books more than once. I hold her on a high I'll-read-this-aloud-to-my-babies pedestal. That being said, her adult fiction stinketh. The Actor and the Housewife was such a disappointment.

If you're planning on reading this book don't read this post. I hope my not liking it doesn't ruin your experience. There are several 5-star ratings on goodreads for this book.

I gave it a 2-star rating. It made me laugh and cry, and that's why it got an extra star. I like books that can do that. But there were so many things that bothered me I would never recommend it. Unless you're simply curious ... and you're a fast reader. :)

Can a married woman be best soulmate friends with a man other than her spouse? Possibly. Should she? No. Absolutely not. Why marry a man you're not compatible enough with to have a real friendship? Eldon and I aren't exactly peas in a pod, but we laugh and laugh and laugh together. We're such good friends I wonder how any friendship before him fulfilled me. The fact that Becky "loves" her husband Mike and is "committed" to her marriage while flying off for weekends with another man makes me gag. Are you reading this, Honey? I'd never do that. Or want to do that. Or admit it if I were even remotely tempted to do that. :) And if you ever wanted to do it, or asked me if you could, or anything remotely similar to those two things I think I'd laugh. I wouldn't realize you were serious. If you didn't laugh with me you'd be in big trouble. :) Mike tells Becky, "I'm having a hard time with this." and "I don't understand." and "I trust you. Do what you feel you need to do." And she DOES it. Sheesh. What are her kids thinking, watching all this?

AND, and, Hale plays it all up like it's some kind of gift from God that she had this special friendship with a man because Becky's husband dies later in the book and Felix helps her through it. Moral of the story: Make friends with a backup man in case you need "platonic" comfort later in the form of cuddles on the couch and long, hand-holding conversations? I just threw up in my mouth. Honey, are you reading this? I would never, under any circumstances, do that. If you're going to move on and date, then move on and date. By all means. But don't sell it to yourself and to your kids that that's what a platonic relationship is like. For the love.

AND AND AND, no amount of token kissing etc. will ever make it up to a spouse if you tell them another person of the opposite gender completes you. Seriously. Eldon, I love you and I'm so glad I married you and you're the man of my dreams and I can't imagine a happier life than the one we share together ... but in order to be 100% honest with myself and my personal needs I need to have an intimate, talk-all-night-on-the-phone, take-weekend-holidays-alone-together relationship with a man who's not you. But don't worry, if it bothers you I'll stop, but I'll become a shell of the woman I once was until you tell me I can again. Can you imagine treating your spouse that way? Honey, are you still reading this? I hope you already know I'd never do that. Or want to do that. Ever. Worlds without end. :)

I recently got back in touch with an old ex, and while I liked it the first couple times we chatted online, I'd rather just talk to Eldon. Nothing against the guy, it doesn't make him a bad person or mean that his friendship isn't worthwhile ... for someone else. But I can't imagine needing him - or anyone - the way Becky needs Felix. I do support the idea that women and girls need other women and girls as friends. I will probably always need a handful of ladies I can welcome into my heart and trust them to tread kindly. But I don't need guy friends.

Anyway, back to the book. Shannon Hale is entertaining, but her adult fiction is very unrealistic. I think this book was marketed to a general audience too, and it's so full of Mormon-ness I wonder what a non-LDS person would think. "So that's how they get through polygamy." Wrong. Wrongwrongwrong. And I don't like that Becky's supposed to be the epitome of a mainstream, typical Mormon woman. No, some of us actually do really love our husbands, thank you.

NOW we can vote for her ...

I just got the stamp of approval from GAP so we're free to vote for Chiara ... if we want. :) Here's the link:


http://www.gap.com/castingcall/

You can search for Chiara S. with ID #250676920 and you'll find her. I hope. The winner gets a trip to see The Lion King on broadway, oh, and lots of gift cards, so Eldon and I are more than enthused. Thanks for your support! Anyone can vote once a day until November 17th, so I'm not sure how many votes we can get in that time, but we'll try. After that it's up to the judges.

Oh, I just reread the rules and she doesn't need votes to win the whole competition, just the fan favorite category. There are kids with over 30,000 votes, so don't bother voting. :) Thanks anyway!! 

Photo Shoot at the Park

This last one wasn't at the park, but she woke up so happy that the mommy in me had to take a picture of that cute face framed with that darling nap hair. I am so pleased with Eldon and me for creating such a darling specimen of babyness! Good for us!! :)

Help Chiara Win!!!!

We entered the GAP casting call contest with this picture of Chiara. I don't know how the judging works, exactly, but she needs votes. :) You can go to this link:

http://family.go.com/gapcastingcall/?cmp=OTC-Gap-BabyGap-HPBanner-Entry

Search for Chiara S. or ShelliEldon. We're not sure which one will get you there ... but when they tell us for sure, we'll be sure to let you know! :) We're shamelessly hoping her cute face can win us something. :)

Wish her luck!!

Morning happies ...

... and mommy groggies. This was taken this morning at 7:30am. That may not seem early to some of you, but when you get home from work at 4:15am, and feed her before going to bed, it's early. :) My favorite aspect of the video is her cute bed hair. She's been having a rough week, so the fact that she woke up happy and willing to play on her own was a big deal. She's been kind of clingy for the last few days. She's a full-blown crawler now, so I'll have to post another video of that soon for her four eager grandparents to watch.

Oh, and I would like to publically thank my friend Mary for giving Chiara her favorite doll of life. Please don't take the head-grabbing and biting the wrong way; in this [dark, chilly, spider-infested, basement] apartment, it's a token of affection. I'll love you forever, Mare ... and not just for the doll. :)

P.S. This is our little one watching this post on the computer. I had to turn on the flash to actually capture her facial expression ... otherwise all you see is the giddy bouncing. :) She cracks me up. Can you see her smile behind the bink? I hope so ... We joke that she's our little narcissist. :) She is her favorite baby, that's for sure.