Hello, dear writer! Thank-you so much for writing for me!

I'm so grateful you've taken the time to read this and write something for me - I know these exchanges take so much effort and time, and I really hope you enjoy the process of creating it as much as I'm sure I'll enjoy unwrapping the gift!

I'm fairly easy to please, so I've listed (in addition to everything on the Sign Up), what I like and don't like below:

Things I love:

1. AUs! I love AUs. I love canon too, but AUs are my absolute weakness - high school, fantasy, dystopia, anything. I'm not a huge fan of sci-fi but other than that, please go nuts!


2. Angst! Not angst for the sake of angst, but angst that makes me feel something or learn something about life or love or whatever, angst that feels real. Angst that feels like somebody might be going through that right this moment somewhere out in the universe. I don't mind how the fic ends, it doesn't have to be a happy ending, but as long as the journey feels realistic I'm all for it!


3. Misunderstandings, miscommunications, people misinterpreting other people's feelings.


4. If you want to just write smut, I'm all for it! But I prefer smut with a side dish of feelings or angst, too.


5. Complex characters. I really love it when characters have multiple layers, or motivations, or contradictions, or are just really very human. They don't have to be good people, but they have to be people! Would really love if you could explore this!

Things I love a little less:

1. Heavy kinks. I'm okay with light stuff, but anything heavy - sounding, roleplay, watersports, etc. - isn't my cup of tea.


2. Crack!fic. I'm sorry, I just prefer either fluff or angst, crack!fic is always so hit-and-miss for me!


3. Shock factor. Please no character deaths just for shock, if there's a reason it's there or if it is important to the plot then that's alright, but please no suicides or car accidents or previous sexual abuse or anything just to create a reason for OTP to be together ;___;


4. Please please no bashing of other characters or of any OCs in the fic, especially if they're female! I really don't enjoy it when female fans, or female characters in general, are presented as rabid awful one-dimensional human beings, it really upsets me.


5. I haven't listed Underage as a squick for me, just because it's a very broad sort of tag, but no huge age-gaps with one participant underage please ;____; I kinda categorise underage as <15yo, if they're teenagers I don't mind so much. But if there is an age-gap then please no pastel characters, it's really not my thing /o\


6. I'm not a huge fan of ABO, it just isn't something I enjoy, sorry :(

That should about cover it! Thanks again so much for writing for me, I can't wait to read whatever you come up with!

With so much love,
Melanie.

I had a super eventful Valentine's Day celebration with the boy, and not for all the good reasons, either!

The date with the boy went well, at least. We went and had high tea in the city, then wandered around for a while, looking at books and so on. He bought me a potted orchid instead of a bunch of roses, which caused me much angst because the last plant I had to take care of was my mum's cactus and I still managed to kill it! I can't even imagine an orchid lasting more than a week in my hands. Fingers crossed, I suppose.

( Then, when I got back home, I realised that my ruby earrings were missing.Collapse )

Today, as I was scrolling my way through Tumblr, I came across a blog called Women Against Feminism. Being curious, I clicked on the blog, and was instantly baffled by the multitude of things being discussed and derided by these women. Some of these attitudes are just so confusing, such as this one:


( Excuse me, but what?Collapse )

I know this happens to everybody - but for some bloody reason, I can't seem to write any more.

I don't know why. This is a really awful kind of Writer's Block; when you have all these ideas, all these things that would have once upon a time inspired you, but you just can't write. I recently asked for prompts in my Tumblr Askbox, and I got heaps - but after writing one or two of them, even though several others inspired me lots, I can't seem to get any words out. I start a piece, get frustrated, and stop.

I think the problem is I've lost my voice. I've lost who I am, when I write. Once upon a time when I wrote the style would just come to my fingertips, the phrases and sentences, the paragraphs, everything would just happen and I wouldn't have to think about it. People would say things like "oh I love how you crafted this sentence!" and I'd just be like "wow, I didn't even... craft it, really. It just came out that way. Wow, how did that even happen?" But now... that isn't happening! When I sit in front of my laptop the words don't come. Everything in my head just feels so stale.

At times like this I feel like, perhaps it's time. Perhaps it's time for me to stop writing, full stop. I've always thought about it; I put a lot of time into writing and reading fanfic, and it takes up a huge part of my life, and stops me from doing a lot of other things. Perhaps it's time to break the habit? Perhaps fandom was just a phase in my life, and this Writer's Block is the clue that I need to move on?

I don't know. I just feel so defeated right now. Why are words so difficult :(