Life in The Circus Ain't Easy

TIME TO MAKE FUDGE.
Yes, I made some vegan fudge. It's delicious. :D

No, but really... the point of this post is to say I'm opening up for some commissions for the Holiday season. I got less than 20 hours on my last paycheck, the electric is due, the dogs need to continue eating, etc. I'm in dire need of some extra funds. So I'm opening up some limited slots for full-color stuff, and un-limited icon extravaganza. All digital.
Color stuff is going to be something like this:
Example1
Example2
Example3
Example4

Starting at 50$ for one character, with backgrounds like shown above. I'm also willing to do something more detailed/painterly looking Like This. That's just a WIP of something I've been working on, but it's a higher resolution than I usually work on and more detailed. I'm starting something like that at 75$ for one character. It's 10$ for each additional character on either detail level. OUTDOOR scenes only at this time. 50$ commissions will be done in time for Christmas. 75$ commissions can be done by Valentine's Day, though I will *TRY* to get them done by Christmas, if they are going to be a gift. Depends on the response I get. Icons will all be completed before Christmas.

Secondly, I'll be taking sketch commissions again. I'm asking 25$ for one character, no background. 35$ for two characters, no background. Or 35$ for one character with a background, 45$ for two characters with background. Sketches will be done in time for Christmas.
Example1
Example2
Example3
With backgrounds:
Example1
Example2

And thirdly, ICOOOONNSSSSSSS. ICON EXTRAVAGANZA. ICONS ICONS ICONS. 5$ 5$ 5$
Okay. :P So, icons for 5$ (plus 1$ for paypal, pls) which include the original 400x400 digital art, and 2 crops of the icon from me. Plus of course you can crop it however you like. Get some for yourself, some for your friends, your girlfriend, boyfriend, brother, sister, pet hampster, grandpa!! Oh, icon examples can be seen HERE.

That said...I'm asking for all payment up front. Paypal is fareme@gmail.com. Comment here or email me if you're interested. :3 I'll be needing written and/or visual character refs if possible, and of course a description of what you want. And as a note, I do accept adult work, but I *really* would rather not do any this time around. My last round of commissions was nothing but adult work and I'm rather burned out on it. x.x

Colored sketch/Detailed color slots:
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6.

Sketch slots:
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6.

Thanks!! <3 <3

Guh, since Kah left it's been one thing after another. o_o My laptop has been totally dead since she left, and I couldn't charge it because my old charger pretty much blew up and wasn't safe to use. I finally got a new (used) charger for it yesterday thanks to one of Malcolm's co-workers. But I'm going to be gone for a while yet, as now our internet will be off tomorrow because we can't pay the bill.
So.. it'll probably be a couple more weeks before I'm back online and around and such. ;_; Sorry guys.

For those of you whom I owe art, be patient, it's in the works! If I haven't responded to any emails it's because I've been offline for a while, obviously. I'm sorry about that. I feel awful that I have such a horrible back-log right now. I'm sorry guys. :{ I swear I am trying to get it all done, but between this that and the other thing it's been hard. I feel like a jerk.

I hope you all are doing alright. I love you guys and miss you.

Well, Kah left yesterday. :((((( I had a TOTAL BLAST while she was here. I think we both really needed it, even if there was a little drama to go along too. Ah well. All in all it was absolutely awesome. I lurves my Kah sister. Thank you for EVERYTHING sis.

I'll make a longer update later with a recap of what we did and post photos and art too. For now, I have to get ready for work. D:
Woooorrrrkkkkkk. D: D: D: D:

I missed you guys, I hope you're all doing well!
Lanakila, I'll also answer your email when I get home, but let me say OMG THANK YOU! ;_; And thank you Likeshine! You guys are the best and I wuvs you both.

Okay, off to sell burgers and fries for another night. *SIGH* D:

Wooot, only about four more hours 'till feralgryphoness gets here!
I spent all day cleaning the apartment today and now it looks so nice, yay. X3
:D I'm super excited, I can't wait to see her again! She'll be visiting until the 4th, so I won't be around much, if at all, until then. I hope you guys all have a good holiday weekend, and take care of yourselves. :}
I'm sure if any of you need to reach me, you know my email. Not that I get that many emails anyway, but eh. :P

Okay then, have fun! I know I will be having tons of fun. :D :D :D Love you guys! And those of you going to AX (which me and Kah were going to go, but decided not to) and AC - have a blast for us! :P

I just got done making a delicious ten bean and barley soup. OMG SO GOOD. Nom nom. :D I was stumped as what to season it with as I'm running low on spices. And then I discovered I had taco seasoning in my pantry. So I put a packet of that in it, and tossed in some salt and pepper and garlic powder and oregeno and YUM. Now I have soup in the fridge to re-heat for dinner tonight and I can see this huge pot of goodness lasting for a couple more days at least. XD I never expected it to make so much, but it's a rather pleasant surprise. This entire pot of soup also cost me less than a dollar, all things considered! Can't beat that. :D

I love my new diet, I really do. I've already gotten a lot of criticizing comments about it from co-workers and such, but I don't care. :P I feel liberated in mind, body and spirit. I feel good. No, I feel great. I think this was the sort of change I've been needing for a long time. And Malcolm has been behind me 100%. As a matter of fact, instead of just supporting me emotionally and verbally he's taken the leap with me and has sworn off meat as well, although he says it's going to be hard to get him to stop eating seafood, at least for now. ;P I'm fine with that, I'm just excited that he's going to be (mostly) vegetarian with me. I had such a hard time getting him to eat fruits and veggies before - now he doesn't have a choice. Bwahaha!

I feel really good today. Even though I'm flat broke until Monday, almost out of cigs, have moon-time cramps and have to work today. Normally, I would be stressed and depressed right now but I just can't be today. Kah gets here Friday, my Mom stopped by my apartment today with stuffed animals (thanks Mom! :P), I have a delicious dinner waiting for me when I get home, friends that love me dearly, and a newfound emotional freedom. I feel like my whole life just took a big deep breath.

Now if this guy who is supposed to buy my car would just BUY it and stop yanking me around so I could get groceries before Monday that would be awesome. :P

I'm going vegetarian. I've turned a blind eye long enough to the incredible creulties in the meat industry, and I've decided not to support it anymore. Over the course of the past week (little more than a week, actually) I've drastically cut down my meat intake - by about 90% if I had to hazard a guess. Will I miss meat? No, I don't think so. Eating almost no meat lately has not affected me in any way but positively. I feel better about myself emotionally, and I feel better overall pyshically. I've been munching on lots more fruits and veggies, beans, and nuts. I actually realized that I had so little of these things in my diet that it was ridiculous - I ate A LOT of meat. An ungodly ammount of meat. Meat in every meal, every day. I ate more meat than anything else in my diet, easily, and ignored many other things or only had them a few times a week. Not nearly enough fresh fruits or veggies. My new diet incorporates the actual servings I need every day of fruits and veggies, and I'm not lacking for any protein (been eating a lot of beans) - which has always been a major part of my excuse to eat so much meat.
But not anymore.

So - I know there are at least a handful of vegetarians (and vegans) on my Flist and I have some questions! My main concern is getting all my essential vitamins - is there a list or website somewhere that I can reference to find out what vegetarian foods have what vitamins and nutrients? Does anyone have some recipes to share, experiences or anything else? As stated - I'm just starting out. Last week I did have some meat (fish and chicken) but from this point forward I would like to stop eating meat altogether, though I may be tempted to have a bit of salmon every blue moon. Or maybe I won't, I'll just have to find out. Mostly I'm curious about grains - I haven't had much experience with them outside of things like oats. What kind of grains are best, how does one prepare them? I know that beans are also a good source of protein - are there other things that provide a complete protein?

Thoughts?

(And just want to say again, thank you, to the good vegans abd veggie folk over at the Gryph Guild, who first inspired me to 'try' a vegetarian diet for a week, and have now inspired me to keep it going. Thanks for the support, guys. :3)

I'm sorry for my earlier post.

All of you, don't ever forget you are loved and cared for. You in particular.

And now I'm going to bed.

I am baking experimental banana muffins right now and MAN THEY SMELL HEAVENLY. If they come out pretty edible or daresay delicious I will share the recipe here on LJ.

OH GOD BUT THEY SMELL SO GOOD. HURRY OVEN HURRY.

*EDIT* OKAY eating one and I think it is safe to say these are pretty damn good.
So, onto the recipe! I modified a banana muffin recipe and cut all the measurements in half because I like baking in small bunches.
So here you go.

( Fareme's Experimental Banana MuffinsCollapse )

Thank you guys for all the earlier support and love. It helped a lot, and I made it through the day with minimal difficulty. I just.. I dunno. This would all be so much harder without you guys, and I want to express that. So many of you have been there with me since day one, and I really, really do appreciate it. ;_; I love you guys.

Work wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be, though when I first got there a few of my co-workers and my manager asked why I was so down. I managed to generally avoid the question, though eventually confessed to my manager (whom I adore) and one co-worker, and even managed to do so (though it was admittedly difficult) without turning into a complete wreck.

On a lighter note - I don't think I've mentioned it here before, but I'm learning Spanish! I've only just started a few weeks ago, and I don't know much yet. I'm learning through an awesome podcast called Coffee Break Spanish, and it's been really fun so far. As of now, I know how to introduce myself and my family, state a few of my likes and dislikes, state my job (and my dislike of it. :P) and I can go through a number of greetings and goodbyes. And of course, I can ask people in turn about their families, where they are from, and what they work in. A few of my spanish speaking co-workers help me practice at work sometimes, and that's really fun as well. One of my co-workers, who is the main one I practice with, has even told me that my pronunciation is really pretty good. I really can't wait to learn more - I think Spanish is a lovely language, with all the rolling R's and such. I love it. Plus it's going to be incredibly helpful once I master it, considering I live in southern California. Although I've only just started tackling the spoken part of it, I hope to pick up practicing my written Spanish soon, as I'm still quite lost on that. It's challenging trying to learn a new language through my own limited resources - I think it would be easier to learn in a classroom setting, but it keeps me occupied and I think I will be more proud of myself if I manage to 'teach myself' through my own means. SO anyway.. I just though I'd share that with you all. If anyone here on my Flist knows Spanish (I know Blaze does, since he LIVES in Spain. ;} ) I would love for you guys to comment and leave some new words for my vocabulary! Perhaps after payday, I'll pick up an english/spanish dictionary. That should also help a lot. I'm still having trouble with the 'masculine' and 'feminine' words, though I'm sure eventually I'll get it.
Anyway.. I'm rambling, so I'll cut it short here.
Thanks again you guys. This is always a hard day for me, but it's a little easier with all your support and love.

Every year I wake up on this day and take a look at the calender, and it strikes me again. Why don't I ever see it coming from yesterday? Why is it always a surprise? :/ I don't get myself.
*sigh*
Today marks four years since Ed died. Four years already. It's almost hard to believe, but at the same time, I can feel the time between now and then like a tangible distance.

Never take advantage of the people you love. I still regret that we were, in essence, fighting when this happened. I had the chance to tell him I loved him one last time, when he called me the night before it happened. That was the only time I didn't tell him that I loved him before hanging up. My petty, selfish actions cost me a lifetime of guilt and pain. And though the ache has subsided over the years, I still feel like I have no closure.

Never go anywhere in a car without wearing a seatbelt, kids.

Here's to hoping nobody will ask why I'm so quiet at work today, as I really don't feel like breaking down there.