He Knows His Way Around a Master Sword

     From out of the depths of my entertainment credenza I recently fished out my Nintendo Wii, blew off the thin layer of dust it had accumulated, and lovingly inserted my latest Wii purchase into its blue-glowing slot. The game: Legend of Zelda – Skyward Sword. For many reasons I am a fan of the Zelda series. Great game play,  intriguing dungeons to explore, puzzles to solve, an arsenal of fun toys with which to kill enemies, bright characters etc. etc. I appreciate a good video game plot just as much as the next guy, but I’m gonna get real with you; just like most heterosexual male gamers play Tomb Raider because they are crushing on Lara Croft, I too have a video game crush. It comes in the form of a pointy eared heart throb. And this is my list of five reasons why The Legend of Zelda’s very own Link is the hottest video game character.

1.       1. The tunic:

Sure, there are tons of video game characters sporting somewhat skimpy, muscle hugging medieval garb. But I defy you to name a video game ensemble of this time period that is more iconic. The boots. The hat. The green. Simple yet stylish. While simultaneously accenting his golden locks and bringing out his serene blue eyes, Link is always looking his best as he topples evil-doers who should really be concentrating on updating their wardrobe instead of wreaking havoc over Hyrule.

2.       2. Strong and silent type:

Yes, an Italian-accented “It’s-a-me!” may make the ladies swoon, but it lacks the suave nuance of the soft spoken Hylian hero. No need for pretentious one liners or mounds of can’t-hit-the-A-button-fast-enough-to-get-through-this dialogue. It’s all in the eyes and chiseled facial expressions that communicate “I WILL dashingly save you (again) Zelda” and “Time to roast the giant demonic pig!” And let’s not forget the impact of a great smile over talking. Whether it is his bashful grin as he helps out yet another whiney town’s person or the exuberant ear-to-ear as he finds the bow and arrows, his smile is worth a million rupees.

3.       3. Awesome Peeps:

     You can tell a lot about a man by the company he keeps. Throughout his long career as a hero, Link has    had many companions aiding him in his quests. In Skyward Sword he has an enigmatic bond with his crimson Skywing, soaring to cirrostratus heights through respect and friendship. Twilight Princess finds him hitched alongside a feisty little imp know ans Midna. This barbed tongue creature didn’t hold back on zingers, but that didn’t hold back Link carrying her to the threshold of her royal fate. In Ocarina of Time (OoT) he is truly a knight on a noble steed when he finds his beloved horse Epona. Saving her from a corrupt (and quite ugly) stable manager, they bravely ride into danger together, and later, after all is said and done, into the sunset for their next great adventure. The greatest bond Link forged with was with his guiding fairy, Navi. Throughout the entire quest of OoT, all you heard was “Hey! Listen! Listen! Look! Watch out! Hey!” but Link patiently and gratefully heeds the wisdom of the blue sprite that had his best interests at heart. Is there a more heart breaking moment in the Zelda series than when Navi inexplicably flew off, leaving Link with wondering thoughts of “Why are you going friend?” I think not.

4.     4.  Musically talented:

     There is something so attractive about an artsy guy. Link’s musical abilities are most magical: He conducts the wind. He goes through time via instruments. He sings wolfish duets into the twilight. I’m first in line for tickets when he goes on tour.

5.       5.He is the freaking hero of TIME:

     Not the magazine. The very fabric that weaves all existence together. That time. He slays demons, vanquishes bands of thieves and destroys evil. Wielding gadgets that would make Bruce Wayne and James Bond jealous, he saves princesses, sages, kingdoms and parallel dimensions alike. He has mastered the skies, seas and land. The most attractive quality of all of this is that he does so thanklessly. For all his heroic work no one throws him a party or a lavish banquet or even bakes him a damn cake. He does it all, without complaint. Just because it is his destiny. And there is nothing hotter than a man of destiny.

Giving Thanks 2011

Good gravy! It's been six months since I've sat before my blog, fingers pecking away to regale cyberspace with my thoughts and words. I'd like to take a moment to apologize to the part of my ego that likes to be consistent and see things through - the rest of me doesn't give him much of a chance. But I'm back (for now) on my fun-sized forum and what better motivation to return than to give thanks, as today is Thanksgiving Eve 2011.

I may not be conscientious all of the time to give acknowledgment to the things that keep me going on a daily basis, so thank goodness for a holiday that encourages tapping into the recesses of my mind to do so. I am thankful for my health. I may not be a perfect specimen of health, but I am able to do so much. I can make food, I can drive a car, I can dress myself. I'm not a star athlete, but I can do summersaults, victory dances, and jumping jacks. I have muscle enough in my arms to give a hug, muscle enough in my legs to run to friends and family in need, and muscle enough in my heart to love.

I'm thankful for shelter over my head and clothes on my back. 

In spite of troubles and flaws, I am thankful for living in a country of want - to eat where I want, shop where I want, say what I want, believe what I want, love and, in some specific locations, marry who I want.

I'm thankful for games - a social pastime that has turned many strangers into great friends.

I’m thankful for music and art and those that create it.

I'm thankful for plumbing, hot water, electricity, heat in the winter and cool in the summer. Utility bills are a small price to pay for comfort.

I'm thankful for two sets of family. First off, my gay-ming family. These folks started out as friends, but over quality time and cherished memories, they have found a permanent place in my heart. I'm very blessed to have these many, many friends in my life. For the friendships that have gotten stronger and the ones I would like to cultivate further. And of course, the family that has been with me for twenty-two years. My sis and bro who are my gaming buddies and life-long friends. A parental unit whose generosity is only out matched by their unconditional love and acceptance. Uncles and aunts who are inspirations on raising families. Cousins who are confidants and friends. A one and only Gran who is an example of vitality and good humor at any age.

I'm thankful for the fight for human equality and rights to EVERY citizen of the U.S.A. And for the men and women who fight for the freedoms for all, overseas and on the home front.

Specifically for the year 2011:

I am thankful for the purchase of my impractical car. It’s fun and I love it.

I’m thankful I was able to participate in a charity event for Primary Children’s Hospital.

I am thankful for fall trips with old and new friends.

I’m thankful for second chances.

I am thankful for the promises of love, comfort and support between me and my best friend and future husband.

And I am thankful to you, dear reader, whoever you are. I wish you and yours a warm and loving day of thanks.

May the spirit of gratitude be forever in our hearts.

M 'n' M: My Last First Date

 

     On May 31st 2011 my life changed dramatically, wonderfully forever. I got engaged to the man of my dreams. In a gazebo that played an integral role in one of our favorite dates of courtship, Matt asked me if I would marry him. Tearfully I accepted his proposal, my heart swelling with joy. That gazebo now has two very significant memories in the Matt-and-Mitch-dating-catalog. But as I reminisce on all the memories in that precious catalog, the most significant (and my personal favorite) would have to be the date that started it all.

     Now, as a little back story, it was quite a long process for us to get to that first date. One summer a few years back I got a message from a dating site I was on notifying me of a new message. Opening it up, I saw Matt's picture for the first time accompanied by a message with an offer to get to know each other. At the time I was already in a relationship so I ignored it. A few months after that, when said relationship was on the rocks, I sent Matt an email. Which he ignored :P Then several months after that, when we were both officially unattached, we found each other on a different site and picked up where we left off, so to speak. After a few days of texts and chats we finally made a date.

     A part of that night I find humorous (though I'm not so sure Matt does) is that I had actually double booked that night. I had made two dates, dinner with Matt being the first, which I had planned to leave fairly early to get to the second date. But as I ran into him in the parking lot of the restaurant, I was struck a bit by "love at first sight." And as dinner progressed, with lively conversation of being gay in Utah, family, religion, interests and activities, etc. I knew I was NOT going to make it to that second date! After nearly three hours of conversation over chicken parmesan and chicken picatta, I had the tingly feeling that I had found someone really special. So dinner concludes and we both want to spend more time together that night, though both of us played it cool and tried not to show our eagerness. Setting our coyness aside, we decided to go bowling up at the U of U campus. In the middle of the game, Matt turns to me and says he like to make a little wager, winner take all. If he wins, then we go to his place and continue the date. After a few more frames go by I turn to him and say that if I win, he has to take me back to his place and continue the date :)

     Little did I know, back when we were making the date and he told me to pick a day, I picked his birthday. It wasn’t until a week or two later that I had realized this and felt mortified that I didn’t know and that he spent his birthday taking someone else out. But today, he says I was the best birthday present he ever received~ 

     And that, I can happily say, was my last first date.

2 Inches Taller Diary: 3 Stretches in 3 Weeks

     If you ask me, I'm 5 ft. 7 in. If you ask anybody else, they would say I'm 5 ft. 5 in. To those people, I say shut up. Denial can be beautifully cathartic. What ever happened to mind over matter? If I believe I'm 5'7'' then isn't it so? Alright, I give. That's a pretty flimsy line of thinking. But what's a poor short guy to do?

     Apparently exercise. I came across a link that suggests thee stretches that can supposedly give you a couple of extra inches. So I'm going to give them a whirl in the hopes to reach my coveted 5'7'' height. (Hey, it beats wearing top hats and platforms).

     Everyday for a week I'll take on one of the three exercises and see if there is a difference.

     Week One: 5/9/2011 - 5/16/2011  DOWNWARD DOG

     This is a yoga pose that is said to strengthen and lengthen. Straighten your gams to their personal limit, push your tush to the ceiling and pull the lats down by the shoulder blades. Inhale the Dragon. Exhale the Monkey. Repeat the breath 8 times and relax. Keep the posture a recommended 2 more times - bearing in mind to prevent your head from dropping or your back arching. Have your head remain on your spine, making your spine one long line. 

     

     Updates and conclusions on the Downward Dog to come! Arf!

Derailed: Fast Track to Nowhere

April 24th - 30th is National Medical Laboratory Professionals Week. I happen to be one of those professionals for which this week is dedicated to. At a small hospital in the burbs of Utah I am a humble specimen processor. Fluids, blood, tissue, and other various creepy things from the human body come in, I process 'em and send 'em off for testing. It's a behind the scenes kinda job that is an integral part of health care. This gig fell into my lap - the working gears of life synchronized nicely to position me into a good job at a great facility. I am blessed to be working and making money - I'm grateful everyday I'm not in the gaping maw of unemployment.

That being said (and sincerely so) this is not where I want to be in life. Just one year ago, I was on a train heading toward an actual career. Flashback to the Fall of 2009: an eager, ever so slightly younger college student proudly walks across the grounds of Salt Lake Community College. Weighed down by a bundle of text books, but uplifted by the prospect of learning a craft close to my heart, I walked through the glass doors of the Health and Sciences building - my first literal step into becoming an Occupational Therapy Assistant (OTA).

After a year of vacillating between possible career paths (psychology? business perhaps?) a wave of inspiration fell upon me. Following my family down the track of health care, I decided on OTA school, my late grandfather serving as encouragement to the decision. In the last years of his life, my grad-dad suffered a massive stroke, robbing him of his normal day-to-day functions. With the help of an Occupational Therapist to reteach him the tasks necessary to live a normal life, he was able to leave this world with a fair amount of independence and dignity. And that was the mark I wanted to leave on Earth - equipped with tools of the trade and compassion, I desired to enter a person's life at possibly their lowest point, and help them surpass tragedy and illness to achieve an independent, well-functioning existence.

With all my prerequisites under my belt, I was accepted into the OTA program. The only OTA program offered in all of Utah, it was a pretty sweet deal. Only two years of study with a projected base pay of $23/hr out the door. Unfortunately, I didn't make it past the first year. Some might call it cruel fortune, others would say "It's life throwing you a curve ball." Personally, I call it a case of cold-hearted bitchery.

All of my hopes, aspirations and hard work had the life choked out of them by a rampant disease I couldn't have foreseen. The program was plagued by the same person who was deemed its coordinator (and I use the term "coordinator" very, very loosely). Unscrupulous, robotic and at times horribly incompetent, this individual cared more about a glowing reputation - conceived through a facade of fakery - than actually taking pride in teaching those who would eventually become peers. (You may think I am using creative license or exaggeration, but I am actually being utterly real here - just ask the other 18 students who have been bogged down by the caustic tyranny) When this person's methods and motivations were put under scrutiny, a toxic backlash began to slowly and surely rise to the surface. A wrath incurred, grades were hijacked, assignments "lost," time and attention to teaching cast away to languish by the wayside.

I don't know if it was a personal distaste for me, or if it was to prove a point (me thinks a combination of the two), but I was put on "necessary" probation which eventually led to a dismissal from the program. Lured into what I thought would be a meeting of reconciliation, I had to sit through a humiliating prosecution where two "mentors" accused me of slacking, cheating, lying and exercising other sorts of unethical behavior. Injury, meet insult. My good name and self esteem were ran through the mud and trampled on.

So ended my career. And a week from now, my former fellow classmates are graduating (ironic side note: April also happens to be OT month). They survived. I wish I had. It's hard to shake off the brick in my gut, mortared to my insides by loss and disappointment. My peers - and my friends that I miss dearly - have accomplished something great. And here I sit. At an entry-level job blogging about how I'm not accomplishing anything.

I can't say my time in the program was a total waste. I met some marvelous people. Including the woman who I credit with pushing me in the direction of meeting the man I love. I'm not a firm believer in the old adage "things happen for a reason." I believe in "fate" and "destiny" in the poetic sense. It makes happenstance or coincidence seem much more magical. But the cynical side of me wants to think that I was part of that class for the time I was supposed to be. That I met the people I needed to and life - in all it's ambiguous cosmic glory - sent me down a different track. Sure, this track does include the affections of a doctor, which in and of itself would seem like a great accomplishment. Yet I still feel empty. Inadequate.

I wish on my train to nowhere I could see past the unknown void. I need a glimmer of some sort to show me where my next destination should be. Or to know that, just because the horizon is shrouded from view, I am indeed headed somewhere worthwhile.

But for now, it's just the sound of a doubtful "click clack, click clack" and a melancholy "choo choo."

Movie Critique: Water for Elephants

     Going into this movie, I wasn't expecting much. From the previews it looked like the typical "boy runs away with circus, steals the boss's wife while training an elephant" movie. But I was pleasantly surprised that there was much more depth and plot to the story than what meets the eye. 

     What was presented as a tawdry affair beneath the big top turned out to be a sincere love story. Jacob, a man who loses his future at the beginning of the show, jumps a random train in the night only to find himself in the company of circus folk. Taking him under their wing, the crew of Benzini Brothers Circus introduce Jacob to a world of freaks, star-attractions and performing animals. But the real beast of the "most spectacular show on earth" is the ring-leader, August. Cursed with a monstrously bad temper, August runs the circus with an iron fist, taking out his anger by abusing the animals and staff. His cruelty drives the headliner, who just happens to be his wife, Marlena, into the comforting company of Jacob, whose love for the defenseless animals kindles Marlena's attraction to him. The more August's tirade grows, the closer Marlena and Jacob come to find how much they love one another. Like a train that goes from town to town, Water for Elephants starts out slow, but gains momentum as the plot progresses and takes the audience through a journey that is as unsettling as it is sincere.

     Reese Witherspoon gave an honest and understated performance as Marlena. Christoph Waltz did his job well as his interpretation of August led the audience to truly despise him because of his treatment of the animals and his wife. Robert Pattinson as Jacob was sub-par (which seems to be normal for him). The true star of the movie was Rosie the elephant - a lush pachyderm with a big heart.

     Overall grade: B

2011 Eggstravaganza Pt. 3: Judgement Day

Ah, the bitter taste of loss. Oh well. Game over for Mr. & Ms. Pacman. Not that I'm bitter, but the judging was totally messed up. But we won't go into that. This post is to acknowledge the talents of my family that won! Congrats to all my Peeps who's eggs were the best of the best! We are a creative bunch and I love you all.

There were three categories: Contestants under 5 years old. Contestants from 6-12 years old. Contestants 13 and up. 

In the the 5 and under category:

  Second Place: Alien (in the top left of carton)

  First Place: Chia Pet (in the bottom left of carton)

In 6-12 Category:

  Third Place: Angry Bird

  Second Place: Scorpion

  First Place: Dragon

In the 13 & up category:
   Third Place: Ruby Ring

Second Place: Coke Bottles

First Place: Minions (This entry won the grand prize and the Outstanding Eggcellance trophy - the creator was my mom so the trophy is still on our mantel :) )

 Honorable Mentions:
    Mother Duck (Step-dad's entry)

    "Dye-ving" Dudes

    Bert and Ernie (Po's Entry)

    Bee Hive

So ends our 2011 Eggstravaganza. It was a fun event as always. Good food, good competition, and great family! Til next year~

2011 Eggstravaganza Pt. 2: Some Assembly Required

     Can you guess what my egg is going to be?

     How about now?

     Last hint! :P

     Mr. & Ms. Pacman  :D  

 
     Results to come later today. Contest begins in T- 1 hour!

2011 Eggstravaganza Pt. 1: Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% preparation

     It's that time of year again folks. My favorite family tradition: our annual Eggstravaganza. This event is right up my alley -  it's family togetherness that feeds my lust for good competition. A fierce contest to see which family members have the creative genius coupled with the mechanical know-how to decorate the best Easter egg of the year. 

    The challenge: Decorate an egg worthy of awards using dye, craft supplies, food stuffs, etc.

    The payoff: Various accolades, bragging rights (leaving your competition with egg on their face!) and the coveted "Outstanding Eggcellence" award, given to the best egg overall. (Note: The "Outstanding Eggcellence" trophy has graced my family's mantel every year since it's inauguration)

    This year's twist: each family is assigned a color they must incorporate in their concept. My clan's color you ask? Yellow - the color of victory!! Which fits PERFECTLY into my egg idea, even before I knew about the twist.

     Now, I can't reveal my concept just yet. The competition is still a day away and there may be spies afoot. But I'm a generous blogger and will bestow a hint to my readers: It involves two hollowed out eggs, Mardi Gras beads, a nervous bunny Peep, and the secret ingredient, nostalgia. 

     This year the eggs must be completed before the event starts. In years past, the event was decorating your egg in the company of family. But Eggstravaganza 2011 is heading straight to the lightning round. 

     I had mixed feelings about this. I do enjoy sizing up my competition and sabotagi.... I mean, seeing everyone's progress before the judging. On the other hand, many a victory has been lost due to poor time management and lack of preparation. A genius idea is worthless if it can't be executed (or should I say, eggsecuted). So yesterday my humble household began our preliminary preparation. Accompanied by the fizzing noise of dye tablets bubbling with vinegar, we mapped out our designs, our necessary accessories scrambled together and gave a hand to each other when needed. Now, it's not customary for competitors (there are no friends or family in games or egg decorating contests) to assist one another, but my mom, step-dad and I all agreed it was important to keep that gloriously tacky egg-shaped trophy under our roof. So I enlisted the use of one of my step-dad's many, many, many power tools (I forget the name of this particular contraption, so for the sake of this post it will be known as the Egg Cutter). This fantastic piece of machinery cuts with such delicate precision - it took out a large chunk of the egg shell without damaging the rest or causing cracks. With my two identically sized eggs hollowed out, I offered them a soothing soak in the yellow dye. Today I'll buy the rest of my necessary supplies and complete my egg. As well as help my love with his egg! (Sappy tangent: I'm so thrilled to have my Po take part for the first time in this family tradition ~_~  He makes my life sunny-side up!)

   Now I must say, after seeing what my mom and step-dad have planned, I already have stiff competition. My knack for nostalgia has its work cut out for it facing my mom's penchant for pop-culture and my step-dad's craftsman capabilities.

    But with two days prep, my concept should prove to be a Grade A Large contender. Omelet-ting you know right now, I'm not going down without a fight!

    Over-easy and out.

30 things you may or may not know about me

1. I am in love with Kristin Chenoweth. Seriously. I have the most celebrity dreams about her. The perfect day would include me and Cheno on a beach in Boca, piña colada in hand, dishing about music, life and who we hate on Broadway. Oh, and she'd let me wear her Glinda crown ~_~

2. Though I don't drink, I own a continually growing Martini glass collection.

3. My burst appendix is encased in glass and somewhere at the U of U.

4. My favorite flavor is lemon.

5. I played an award winning role as a mayfly in a high school comedy sketch that got great reviews. "BZZZZ"

6. I'm dyslexic.

7. Easter is my favorite holiday.

8. Sunflowers make me happy.

9. I lost a spelling bee misspelling the word "misspell."

10. I'm allergic to fruit. (insert joke at your own convenience)

11. Some of my nicknames include, but are not limited to: terwillerger, pookie, Mutch, Mitchell Delores (coined by my aunt), Little M and my personal favorite, Junior Mint.

12. Cheddar Goldfish Crackers are my ideal snack-food.

13. The first book I ever read on my own was Rainbow Fish. Share your glittering scales!

14. I'm an avid gamer. Card games, video games, board games, mind games.... And I'm horribly competitive at them all.

15. I have two designated "rainy day movies:" Clue and Young Frankenstein.

16. After taking a Disney Princess Personality test (don't look at me like that - we were bored that night and I wasn't the only guy to take it) I found out I am most like Ariel. I can't sing, I can't swim, and I'm not stupidly rebellious. Yes, it is truly a cornucopia of similarities.

17. I am in possession of my very own bowling ball, Pinkiller. (complete with ChainChomp ball cozy)

18. Out of my 114 friends on facebook, I am really only friends with 41 of them.

19. I got the coveted role of Alvin, from Alvin and the Chipmunks, in the 6th grade Christmas Play.

20. I have a phobia of being burned. That's why I don't learn to cook :P

21. Candara is my favorite font.

22. I thank God everyday that my parents got divorced.

23. There is an imprint of an axle from a hot wheels match box car on my forehead, courtesy of my sister. Love ya sis!

24. If I could have any Super Mario minion as a pet, it would be Boo.

25. I only eat pickles one day out of the year.

26. My favorite animal is the Octopus. Followed closely by the Duck-billed Platypus.

27. I'm in love :)

28. I'll take any excuse I can to dress up. 

29. I'd do anything for my friends and family cause they have done so much for me.

30. I don't believe in luck.

Can you hear me down here?

     *Psst* Over here. No, not there - here. Down here. Hi! It's me. Looked right over my head didn't you? That's ok. It happens all the time. What can be expected when I'm a 22 year old guy who stands at a modest 5 feet 6 inches. It's natural to overlook a man who doesn't fall into the typical tier of "manly." Since a young age, my slight stature was always brought to the center of attention.And as I grew older (but not taller) the attention progressed into teasing. "Shrimp" they'd call me. "MiniMe." "Hobbit Kid." Albeit clever, I did my best to let the gym-class-jeering roll off my back. After all, it's easy to let things roll off one's back when they don't have that far until they hit the ground. Yet, a nasty side affect of teasing couldn't help but occur; stifled under the weight of not being taken seriously, I lost my gumption, my fortitude, my voice. 
     Through the years I learned to embrace my diminutive presence. And when I say "embrace" I mean self deprecate. But in the fun, wacky way. Akin to "when the world laughs at you, laugh along." Beating people to the punch of pointing out my own vertical limitations became a nice self-defense mechanism. And while on the surface the self-made jabs were light hearted - created with a smile - underlying was a sense of apology. Like, "Hey everyone! Look at me - I'm short! :D And I'm really sorry you have to interact with me :/" Until one day, in the midst of getting to know a group of people I'd be spending everyday with, my routine song-and-dance-of-shortness was met with a come back that helped melt away the lackluster view of myself:
     "You're just fun sized."
     Fun sized. I like it I thought to myself. All of a sudden, a fact of life I couldn't change went from a punch-line to a niche. Yes, I'm a short, skinny, perpetually awkward young adult, and I'm really ok with it. It's a trait that accentuates who I am and lends me notice. Some people have a third nipple, some women have carnival-worthy facial hair, I'm short. It's something that lets you pick me out from a crowd. (As long as I'm not in the center of said crowd). 
     By this point, you must be wondering: And you're prattling on about your height becaaaaause...... Well dear friend, my point is that the way the world perceives my outward appearance directly affects my inner core. How I feel, think and react to the world around me. Sometimes positive. Sometimes negative. But it doesn't stop at my own transformation. The shape I internalize from my environment can be externalized to shape the things around me. Hence this nifty little blog. A place I can recapture my voice and share my perspectives - from where I stand - of the world we all share. 
     I won't go as far to say that my blog (entitled with clever word play, if I do say so myself) will be earth-shattering and life-changing. To say that would have me cross the line from "Humble Hobbit Kid" to "Captain Napoleon Complex." The Low-Down is an arena in which I can muse. And my musings will range from controversial, to deep, to light-hearted, to frothy whimsy.
     Your job is to just read, whether you are moved to comment or not. Whether my words stick in your head or fall out of memory within the hour. I'm here to stay.


     They say big things come in small packages. Gosh, I hope they're right.