hazevie

I was just musing and thinking, as one does, when I opened bilibili and coincidentally scrolled down to the bottom of my save folders and saw its  title: On JingXi, Lin Xi, and NiF2. 

At the top was this video, a video posted in 2021 celebrating the fourth anniversary of the drama airing and the ship being, you know, a thing. And yes, I'd say this is the best video I've seen of the ship, ever. 

And then, much to my own dismay, my brain did the math for me and now I'm sitting here wondering where all the time went since I've come to know Lin Xi as a character. Yeah, it's been more than 7.5 years. And she's still a character I point to immediately when I'm asked my favorite character in media, and I have to brace myself every single time because everyone's just gonna say, Who's that, or oh, I didn't watch NiF2, or NiF1 was much better. 

Nirvana in Fire 2 was an experience when I was watching it as it aired. It had a terrible schedule - two eps only on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday - which came up to six episodes a week. Add on the fact that its pacing, although still better than the majority of dramas I've seen in terms of development and character arcs, is most definitely flawed and a little bit slow (especially when compared to NiF1), which made for a uniquely torturous experience. Finally, NiF2's tone is pretty heavy; there's a sense of helplessness when bad events happen because our main cast is mostly in the limelight and have to defend themselves against devious schemes, so it wasn't necessarily surprising to see that NiF2's viewership was lower than that of its predecessor. I am proud to proclaim that I was one of the people who toughed it out, and Lin Xi was the major contributing factor to me being able to follow along as it aired. 

Back then, the reason I was first drawn to Lin Xi was very shallow. She's a doctor, a student of the Master of Jifeng Hall, and the audience is immediately introduced to her skill as the first events and battles of the drama unfolds. As the drama develops, there's first an epidemic (a fact that seems quite haunting, actually, since the drama aired before covid) and then during the time when she and Pingjing split due to their differences and all of the unfortunate events that happened in between, she continues traveling the country to find medicinal herbs and create her own records. I was just drawn to all of this because, well, at the time I was going through a self-assured phase where I for sure thought that I was going to be a doctor. So I simply admired her for being a good doctor. 

Through the years, though, I've come to realize that Lin Xi is so much more - she is indeed a great doctor, but now I believe that she is nearly the epitome of representing what an independent woman means in C-drama and c novels, an ironic fact again given that NiF2 is a historical drama/IP that came out 7.5 years ago. 

She is a character that will say to the person she loves that if their ideals and their final destination do not match, even if she loves him, she won't change herself or stop in her footsteps. She is a character who choose her own path, career or relationship-wise. She is a character that states (in the book version, not the drama) that her love was never fiery or passionate like most people describe love is like; her love was simply a stream that carved a valley itself before merging with the stream that originated from her partner's love. Given the historical setting this character is related to, she is a special one that says she cannot be a housewife that stays inside and looks to her husband to be her sky; her wish is to save patients as a doctor, disregarding all fame and fortune. She never loses herself within love, and yet she remains benevolent and understanding; in fact I'd say that she was the individual guiding her love with Pingjing more, defying what's considered 'regular' dynamics. She is that character who helps everyone with their emotions and troubles, and is able to heal herself with her seemingly endless resilience. Sometimes, I wish. I really wish that I could be like her. As strong as her, as talented as her, as understanding as her, as cute as her. 

There was another scene in which I remember very clearly: Pingjing had just finished helping her organize her medicine records into a complete book when he had stated that she was so much stronger than him in every way: that she had the ability to save those of the mortal world while also having the most benevolent heart. And then Lin Xi answered that he shouldn't make comparisons like that, that the most moving aspect of the mortal world is that everyone is different, where everyone can excel at what they are passionate about. 

I've always headcanon'ed that after the events of the drama/book, when Lin Xi and Pingjing are finally reunited and are able to wander the world as they please, their marriage dynamics are more similar to a matrilocal marriage than traditional marriage as was defined by the historical setting. Think about it: Pingjing is by her side as they travel the countryside, where most of their money and travel fees come from Lin Xi helping patients along the way. Plus, given that Lin Xi is literally the XiEO (lol) of Jifeng Hall, her family has more wealth than Pingjing now, haha. So of course it would be a matrilocal marriage, with Pingjing as Lin Xi's assistant as they travel to their heart's content. 

Wherever they are in that fictional world, I wish Lin Xi safe travels, forever and ever. And for her to be happy with Pingjing, a fact I kind of envy Pingjing for (but I love him too so. I won't be the bad guy breaking up them up or whatever, lol). 

So yeah. Coming to terms with the passage of time isn't necessarily easy, but it's easier with fiction and favorite characters by our side. And the answer to the question I've posed: I don't think so. I genuinely think I'll remember Lin Xi for a long time, 20+ years, maybe. Maybe a lifetime. 

Finally, some iconic Lin Xi quotes:

Recently I've been rewatching the Story of Yanxi Palace (延禧攻略), the Qing period palace drama set during the Qianlong Era, I've come to realize that it's really a baihe shipping haven. First of all, Wei Yingluo, the protagonist, is probably one of the most lovable female main characters to have come from c-drama. On bilibili there's always sayings of "爱上魏姐跟呼吸一样简单" (Loving Wei Yingluo is as easy as breathing itself), and I would agree. Omg. Even back when I watched this at a pretty young age when it was coming out back in 2018, I really liked Yingluo, and now, taking another look at it, I love her even more. 

Moreover, Wei Yingluo attracts the attention of both men and women in the plot of this drama (romantic or not, it's some type of love, but because I have a romantic ship oriented brain I will just say ship haha) and I still think the majority of them are all really shippable. In just baihe I currently have four ships:

1. 令后 (LingHou, or Wei Yingluo x Fuca Rongyin, the Empress)
2. 令娴 (LingXian, or Wei Yingluo x Shushen, Consort Xian)
3. 令庆 (LingQing, or Wei Yingluo x Lu Wanwan, Consort Qing)
4. 璎明 (YingMing, or Wei Yingluo x Ming Yu)

And gotta admit, even back then when ya girl did not yet know that she was gay she was also pretty invested in the het ships lol? Like. 
 
傅璎 (Fuca Fuheng x Wei Yingluo) is still a ship that sticks out in my memory of fandom because I shed so many tears when they had to part, and there was an amazing fix-it fanfic that I read back then that still cements the memory of this ship in my mind. 

利落 (Hongli, the Emperor Qianlong x Wei Yingluo), while I didn't really like this ship back in the day, now I can appreciate the tension and understanding they have for each other. This ship is actually REALLy different from my general taste nowadays, especially in comparison to my other favored het ships like Percabeth and 旌奚, but I've def come to appreciate it a lot more... (begrudingly admitting this, argh)

In any case, LingHou is probably my most favorite out of the baihe ones, because it's just so... mutually shared. YingMing are also very cute and sweet, and I keep on holding onto the fact that Ming Yu was truly the last representation of the happy times they all shared in Changchun Palace. LingXian has the most tension and mutual respect, while LingQing is just. fluff. Sweetness. Two women mothering a child. So cute. ahhh. There is still so much I could write about every ship. Might do more later.

I do think the one leg Yanxi has up on 甄嬛传 (Empresses in the Palace) is that all of the baihe ships I've listed here are relatively healthy. The only one I can name in Zhen Huan would be 眉嬛 (MeiHuan), which, to be fair, is also a great ship, but alas there's a lot more women hurting women in that drama compared to Yanxi (not that Yanxi doesn't have this issue, but I think it showcases more personality and difficulties the characters face, and the repression of feudal dynastic society). 

Here's a complete gravestone epitaph analysis that I cut from the main post because archaic Chinese is difficult and I was getting impatient so I posted first haha. 

(Also known as with the help of traditional Chinese dictionaries, Baidu and bilibili, I attempt to read between the lines)

In traditional recorded history, Princess Taiping and Shangguan Wan'er had basically no interaction. However, in Shangguan Wan'er’s gravestone epitaph, there is a specific line that records, 

太平公主哀伤，赙赠绢五百匹，遣使吊祭，词旨绸缪。

Translation: [Upon hearing Shangguan Wan'er's death], Princess Taiping sank into sorrow. She donated five hundred bolts of fabric [for funeral use], and sent a representative to pay respects, the words of the eulogy written with heartbroken longing.

There interesting thing her is that the phrase 绸缪 chou mou comes from a Shijing (The Odes) article Bin Feng Chi Xiao, and it mostly denotes the fierce love between couples, and has many other uses within Chinese literature history describing such. The fact that this phrase is used here is a huge sign that WanPing's relationship went deeper than first surmised. 

Basically, what this line is saying that Princess Taiping donated the capital to make Wan'er's funeral a grand affair, and sent someone before her coffin to pay respects and read the eulogy that she wrote for Wan'er. This particular eulogy had some strong wording that made people describe it as 'chou mou', which in other uses, points to fierce love between regular couples. 


Also, there's the final two lines of the epitaph: