the Sarcastic Bastard

Your Superhero Profile

Your Superhero Name is The Android Sailor Your Superpower is Chemical Your Weakness is Body odors Your Weapon is Your Energy Spike Your Mode of Transportation is Skateboard

These are all the states my girlfriend Kim has been to. Yeah, we're bored as fuck on Saturday afternoon. J/k ;D



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

Hey, we've got the website for my TV show in alpha release, and I thought I'd let y'all get a peek at it before it goes public. Any input you've got would be greatly appreciated, and you can mail that to info@35SM.com or leave a comment here.

DANKE

If it weren't for all the thunder and crying in Passion of the Christ, I would have gotten some much needed rest. Too much blood for me, and I'm a fan of good gore. Over the top, too much hype. Who does this guy think he is? Don't even bother renting it unless you're going to vote for Dubya or you want something to balance out all the tentacle porn you've been downloading.

Hero wasn't worth the hype either, though there were a handful of astounding establishing shots and great locations. The characters were mediocre, but the soundtrack was really sweet. Prolly make a crappy videogame for it come 2006.

Alien vs Predator was a bust, but it'll sure make a rad videogame. Actually, the whole thing felt like a really long trailer for something about to come out on XBox. What's with the the guy from Aliens being in it as a human? I didn't quite get that one, but when you base your franchise around a couple of rubber suits and cool gear, you can pretty much get away with whatever you want.

Napoleon Dynamite was great. I recommend it to everyone with a funky sense of humor. Straight on establishing shots, perfect score and by-the-book photography make it stand out as a wonky winner in my mind. Reminds me of those Orbitz gum commercials.

Collateral was gritty and cool, if completely predictable in plot and none-too-flashy in the fight scene department. Cruise cracks that pistol like a real assassin, and walks the walk of a calculated killer. Foxx's character feels like a real person, like someone you might talk to in line at the bank - seems like he'd make a great cross-over into drama.

Call me a geek, but one of my favorites I've seen recently was the Bourne Supremacy. It had lots of good action scenes, felt very true to life, and it was really what the last Bond flick could have taken a page from. I loved all the soggy/shiny b-roll of the cities, and great pains were taken to make every location feel authentic. Good rental if you cant make it to the theater.

I can't wait 'till Garden State opens in a better theater near here, the one theater it is playing at is just a dump. I hate that. Zach Braff rocks my socks, it's got a great theme song, and who can resist Natalie Portman?

Kaywood asked me to direct a commercial for a local Japanese toy store/ fashion boutique, so I have to get down there and scope it out. Brad and James have said they'd crew for me, so I just have to bribe Morgan to run camera. Hopefully the toy store will want to put the ad on TV or at least a website. I have an idea for a sort of macro'd toy teaser spot, but I'll have to talk with the owners before anything like that happens. Maybe I should bone up on my Japanese business etiquette.

Shooting in Goldendale this weekend went well. There were a few snags, but I think for the most part we did really well. The footage looks awesome, and we got enough scenes shot to make the episode work. Brad and I drove Morgan's new baby kitty home and Brad shot some footage of little Hoo climbing all over my car as we drove those 250 lonely miles. Cute little booger, Morgan named her after James' character from this episode, Hoo Sucker the inbred hick farmer.

I blew way too much cheddar this weekend, but at least the shooting went well. Meh, it was worth it. Way worth it.

I just love finding porn series' that feature people I know. I'd say it's more rewarding than when they send you the pics themselves, but that's hot too. God I love red hair.

A Swedish Lutheran pastor, who faked telephone text messages from God to get his nanny-lover to murder his wife and try to kill the husband of a second mistress, was sentenced to life in jail Friday, reports CNN.

The case has fascinated Sweden with its intoxicating mix of sex, death and the workings of an obscure religious sect.

So someone just called my on my cell.. but I'm not really sure who I was talking to. Maybe it was Kat? Khanie? When the fuck is Cooper going to call and come over? He's over 45min late. Fucker.

Twist that nipple for me baby! Thanks for the fun experience!!!

ShawnJ
------
"Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance."
~Unknown

We just wrapped on our third episode, which I helped direct, produce, and rather reluctantly tape. My footage turned out a lot better than I'd hoped for, and producing the damn thing felt like something I could do for a long time.