"Be the change that you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandhi

Today I cracked.

I'm fed up. I'm upset. I'm so angry that this is the world we live in.

While my feeds on social media and the headlines on the news are overrun with debates over coffee cups and Christmas sweaters and ridiculous things and people that don't deserve our attention, there are SO MANY other important issues we should be feeling more passionately about. It seems the world is divided on EVERYTHING and it's causing some serious negative energy that I have overwhelmingly felt recently. It's a real downer.

I've been saying it all day and I'll say it again: if we cared as strongly about REAL issues as we do about coffee cups and Kardashians, the world's problems could be fixed.

Recently I've been thinking a lot more about this. I always talk about a want and need to get involved in some cause to better one of the world's evils, and that of human trafficking is one I am particularly interested in combatting. Well, today I'm done talking and I'm taking action. I'm trying harder to be the change that I wish to see in the world.

Today I became an abolitionist.

A real, live, 21st century abolitionist, committed to the freedom of human slaves and their subsequent rehabilitation.

There's an organization called Operation Underground Railroad. It is founded by Tim Ballard, a former CIA then Homeland Security agent who worked for years rescuing children from child sex tourism. He retired from that position in 2013, and since beginning O.U.R. in 2014 has rescued nearly 300 victims and assisted in the arrest of about 50 traffickers in various missions. Not only are they committed to these rescues, they have merged with the Elizabeth Smart Foundation to help in the rehabilitation of all those that are rescued. They have become a powerful force for good and need help and support to keep up the amazing work they are doing.

I'm tired of whining about the stupidity of the world and what they find issue with, yet not spending my time fighting for a cause I think to be noble or worthy of attention; so, I enlisted in O.U.R.'s corp of abolitionists today. While it's just a small step, I'm doing something. Finally. I am serious about this cause and want to do more. No human being should be kept from the freedoms that I enjoy. I am an abolitionist because innocence must be protected. The basic human rights of "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" are deserved by all. Freedom for all.

Freedom can be taken away, and it is taken away from 10s of millions in our world right now. We look back on our history as an American people and feel ashamed for the years that slavery was allowed to persist in our nation, but what are we doing now to combat the atrocity that is more prevalent in the world today than it has been in its history?

"Those who deny freedom to others, deserve it not for themselves." - Abraham Lincoln

If you want to get involved in Operation Underground Railroad, check out their site.

I've picked a REAL issue to fight for. What will yours be?

Here's a link from the US Department of State on "20 Ways You Can Help Fight Human Trafficking."

Here's a link for World Vision, where for $39 a month you can sponsor a child and provide them with access to clean, safe water, improved nutrition and basic healthcare and quality education that can help break the cycle of poverty.

Here's a link to Footsteps for Africa, a non-profit started by a friend of mine to surpass the corruption that sometimes overtakes humanitarian aid, to provide support for the well-being of children and their education.

There are so many ways we can change the world, even if we don't have a lot of money to spare, there are things we can do. Pick a cause. Fight for it as passionately as we let ourselves get over the trivial nonsense. Let's just get rid of the negativity that seems to be overtaking us and fight the good fight. What goes around comes around. Whatever energy we put out into the universe, it comes back to us. Let's keep things positive, everybody.

Let's unite on at least that.

Adulting

Hello blog-world. Blogosphere. Whatever the kids are calling it these days.

So, there has been an outcry from friends and family (especially the westerners) to know what is going on in my life. While I have been horrible at regular updates, this post is an attempt to catch you up on at least one aspect and give you all the deets.

So I got a job.

An adult job. With a salary. Full time. Monday-Friday. Job.

I'm pretty excited about it. This job came about after a couple months of continual rejection. Apparently in order to get an entry level job in the art market world in NYC you need to have a few good years of experience in the market (preferably in the NYC scene). Most people do a whole bunch of internships (mostly unpaid or just barely paid). I did 2. But let's be real, aintnobodygotmoney/timefodat. Or at least I don't. So I was beginning to get frustrated thinking I would have to leave NYC or shift focus to expand my horizons outside the art world. Luckily, that isn't the case anymore.

Lawrence Steigrad Fine Arts. A gallery started by Lawrence Steigrad and his wife, Peggy Stone, in the 1980s specializing in old master paintings (primarily dutch) and British portraiture from the 16th-19th century. It's in the Upper East Side so it's one of those older classy joints with wood panels and floors and a fireplace. It's a gorgeous space. I was invited in for an interview on Wednesday, received a call for an offer on Friday, and I start working tomorrow. Whirlwind week! It's crazy how fast things can change.

I will be the gallery assistant. It will just be us three at the gallery, so eventually, with some time and training, I will be assisting in every aspect of running a secondary market gallery. It's kind of the best entry level position a girl could ask for. GUYS. I will actually get to handle the art. Because I'm a nerd, that's one of the things I'm most excited about. Also, Larry and Peggy are so incredibly kind and wonderful and I can't wait to learn from them and work at their side. I know they will teach me a lot. When Larry called me to offer me the spot, his first words were "Are you ready to make a career move?!" I, of course, exuberantly replied "YES." Then when discussing the details of the offer it came down to this: "You take care of us and we will take care of you." I knew then that this was going to be an amazing opportunity and experience with them and I couldn't ask to be taken under the wing of better people. And I can't wait to take care of them!

So I start tomorrow! I'm nervous. I guess that's normal, right? First day of my first grown-up job... I'm adulting. It feels real nice. And, I GET TO STAY IN NYC INDEFINITELY!!!

Memorable moment: Tonight I got invited to one of the ward dinner groups that I forgot to sign up for (cuzofcourseidid) by my roommate and her friend Brian, who was hosting. Brian lives in this great apartment a few blocks from me and has a rooftop terrace(! those are a big deal). We were just sitting at the table on this rooftop terrace, there were string lights around the edge, the city lights were all just coming on and the moon was right above us, and Frank Sinatra "New York, New York" was lightly playing in the background while we were all talking/laughing/eating, and I just had this magical moment where I felt like I was completely in the right place at the right time. New York is my home, and I love it. I love the amazing people I have met here and love hearing their stories of life in this crazy place. I wish I could fully describe how perfect of a moment it was, but alas, I am left without words. It just felt real nice. Fin.

Someday I'll tell you about the giant thesis I am working on that I turn in next month, but right now the level of anxiety that surrounds it is almost unbearable, so I'm not going to ruin this great weekend with talk of that right now. To be continued...

Life is good. GOD is good.

Back at it again

Hello, world of the interwebs. It's me again. Just over a year again I wrote this long post about how I was recommitting to the blog thing. Well, as you can see, that didn't really stick. It may appear I have commitment issues (which I think we knew...). I'm trying again. Emphasis on the trying. Let me explain why.

Last night I went to FHE with my ward (Family Home Evening was designated by my church as a time to set a part exclusively for family every week on Monday night, and since I don't yet have my own family, my small congregation of single peeps get together every week to have some fun and create uplifting experiences). Last night was the first night I went to FHE in a really long time. Perhaps since I've moved to the city (Oh yeah - I have moved to New York City since my last blog post). It was at our bishop's house with his delightful wife and kids. The topic of discussion? Recording memories. The bishop and his family shared some personal experiences they've had with journaling and how it enriches their lives. Their two kids shared entries from their journals that were incredibly detailed and quite hilarious. The thing that I loved about these entries were the incredible details these kids included. I'm sure at the moment they probably seemed mundane or unnecessary to include, but believe you me it allowed for some good laughs and some keen recollection for this family. Bishop asked us to think of an experience we have had recently, whether it be sad, happy, funny, whatever, and asked us if we had written these things down. Immediately several experiences came to mind. I've had a fantastic year, have met some incredible people, been extremely lucky in my travels and schooling... and I haven't written anything down. As I was trying to think of something I could share, I had a hard time recalling some of the little details similar to those that were so prevalent in the writings of an adolescent boy, that I knew he would read with fond memory in future years. It's kind of upsetting, to realize you're forgetting your life.

So, in an attempt to right this wrong, I want to do better. This blog is mostly for me to record my thoughts and musings and complaints about life, but I love to share those things with friends and people I love. So, read on, if you choose, because my life is sometimes a joke. It should make for great entertainment. But also life happens, things get hard, and I really enjoy when others share those hard experiences because it allows me to find strength and rely on the experiences of others for help and reassurance. I'm hoping this here blog can do the same for others, if not just for my future self.

Looking back at my post from a year ago, it really explains the theme and title of this blog. If you're interested, I refer you to my last post from March 2014.

I'm back! (to blogging, that is)

Ciao tutti! Hey y'all! I decided to get this blog up and going again, finally. Partly because the BYU ISP is having a blog contest for those currently participating in study programs abroad, and there is a prize. But mostly because I need to. And I've known I needed to for a long time. I just tend to put things off sometimes. And with this I just didn't even know where to begin, so I didn't. But I have a lot of thoughts A lot of thoughts with little capacity to translate those thoughts into spoken words, or in this case, written. I used to be good at it when I was frequently posting on my blog and writing several papers for school. So this blog will be, once again as it once was, an attempt to better express myself and my many jumbled thoughts that are up there in my brain into words. For my own good and probably for that of others in my life. I just KNOW you all want to know what I am thinking all the time. 

To start I want to go back a ways and explain, once again, the title of this blog: "Live Living." The end of my sophomore year of college, I was enrolled in an American Art class to fulfill a requirement for my major, Art History and Curatorial Studies. Our professor, one of my favorites, Professor James Swensen, assigned us the book "The Art Spirit" by Robert Henri. Robert Henri was an influential artist and teacher in the early 1900s, based in the northeast. I absolutely loved this book, and it was full of great insights into the mind and techniques of an artist. But not only that, I found it quite inspiring for my life, one who has no artistic skill whatsoever (unless we're talking about choreographing a hip hop routine... then we'll talk). One of the quotes that stood out to me most was that of (now I'm quoting this from memory, so it might not be exact. I don't have the book with me at the moment) "The reason that most artists live to such a great age is because they live living, rather than live dying." Got it? LIVE LIVING! I kept running that through my mind, and eventually I decided to make it a new life motto, title my blog after it, and share it with the world (or at least those in my small BYU, Utah world...). Ever since I was little I've loved the quote by Thoreau (I think) that said "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined." I remember it was on a magnet that was stuck to the moniter comm. unit in our laundry room growing up. And I still carry it with me on trips on an embroidered pillowcase made by my mother as a gift before I set off on an 8 week study abroad in Europe Spring of 2010, followed by my 19 month mission to Italy, and again here on an international internship in Siena. 

Life should never be wasted. Not even a second. We all have dreams, goals, things we want to accomplish, and there is no reason not to accomplish them. I honestly and sincerely believe that if we live our lives right and WORK, all of our dreams we have for this lifetime can and will come true, even if a lifetime is what it takes for it to finally happen. 

As a 24 year old BYU senior graduating in April with a degree of Art History returned missionary having seen 15+ countries aunt of 9 (almost 10) and being surrounded by a myriad of wonderful people that I have met and loved all throughout, it is safe to say that many of my dreams have been accomplished. But I ain't done dreamin' yet.

So hold tight and bear with me as I am recommitting and as I continue to document and record my attempts to make all my dreams come true, whether they are actually accomplished, or only temporarily postponed. 

I LIVE LIVING.

Arrivederci e ci vediamo!

Welp, here we are. This is it. My last night at home. It feels surreal. I have nervous butterflies, but I'm so excited. I report to the MTC tomorrow morning at 12:40. And I'm leaving in 45 minutes to get set apart. Aahhh! Sometimes you just need to yell. But it's a good yell. I can't wait for tomorrow, to get to meet my new companion, get that name tag, realize that I'm really doing this thing... haha.

Thanks to everyone who came to my farewell on Sunday. I was overwhelmed by all the familiar faces I saw and can't believe how nice people are. I love all of you!

I know that this is THE true church on the earth today, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (or as I'll be saying for the next 18 months... La Chiesa di Gesu Cristo dei Santi degli Ultimi Giorni!) I am so grateful for the Atonement, and that because of it we have a chance to return to live with our Father in Heaven. I know that Joseph Smith restored this gospel and that The Father and His Son appeared to him in the Sacred Grove. I know that Thomas S. Monson is a real and true prophet and that he gives us the guidance our Father wants us to have. I love this gospel, and I am so grateful for the opportunity I have to share it with the people of Italy. I love all of you!!! This is my testimony, and I share it with you in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Wish me luck! Ready or not...

Follow me during my 18 months at this blog over here: http://sorellaforbesinitalia.blogspot.com/

Next week!!!

AAHHH!!! Next week is the week. I am kind of freaking out. But in a good way. I've had all my nervous panic attacks that I think I will have (I hope...) and now I'm just ready to get out of here. It is crazy how fast the time has been flying. But I get more and more excited everyday.

A few things you might want to know before I go:

- I set up another blog that my mama will be updating with letters and photos and other tidbits while I am out there doin' some good. The URL is http://sorellaforbesinitalia.blogspot.com/ Follow it! I mean, only if you want updates on how things are going across a continent and a half and an ocean...

- My farewell is this Sunday if you are in Utah and would like to come. 9 AM at the CC Stake Center at 13400 S. 1300 E. in Draper. I would love to see your shining faces. I am really getting nervous for that...

- I got my hurr did today. In case you wanted to know. It's shorter.

- I AM SO EXCITED!!!!

That's all folks. I love you all! I'll probably post at least one more time before I peace out. In case you were concerned...

Warning...

So, I just want to warn all of my peeps out there that I'll have to say goodbye to in 3 weeks: I'm really bad at goodbyes. I kind of become an emotional wreck. I really learned this when I said goodbye to my two sisters and their families last week. It was horrible. I cried. A lot. I'm sure I'll cry when I have to say goodbye to you. I know it's only 18 months, but I'm learning it's going to be a lot harder to say goodbye than I thought. Even though I know what I'm doing is the right thing and I'm very excited for it. So, just wanted to warn you. Be prepared.

Another thought, I really love this song. My sister showed it to me while I was staying with her. I also have an unusual fascination with Lady A's "Just a Kiss" and "We Owned the Night." I normally don't like country very much, but I love these guys. Just thought I'd throw that out there...

Oh! Also, I've always loved Ingrid Michaelson, but the words to this song are absolutely amazing. Love it:

Boy, how I'm going to miss my music...

Friends

This post is dedicated to friends.

I have been blessed with some of the greatest friends a gal could have.

I thank all my amazing friends for being there for me when I needed you most.

You know who you are.

To the friend who I called crying, missing so desperately that someone I had tragically lost just months before, and you showed up 5 minutes later with ice cream, a movie, and a shoulder to cry on. And you cried with me. I'll love you forever for that.

To the friend that came into my life at precisely the right moment, and made my life a little brighter than the darkness I had felt I was in. You told me I did the same for you, and that made me feel even happier. It seems like I have known you forever, and I will love you forever.

To the friend who was there when I suffered my first broken heart. I didn't need to say anything, you just knew I needed you. And you knew exactly what to say to ease the pain. And didn't mind me boy bashing your ear off...I couldn't help it...

To the friend that sat in the car with me and talked about missions for over two hours after I told her I was seriously conflicted. You really eased my fears and helped clear up the fog that was holding me back from making the decision, which I know for a fact is the right one. I will forever be grateful for that.

To the friend that I treated horribly after being told you had done something to hurt me, and I didn't even think to come to you to find out the truth because I was so blinded by my infatuation with the one who told me. You took me back as if nothing had happened when I finally talked to you months later. I'm so glad we are back to being the good friends we were before, and thank you for forgiving me.

To the friend who I called after having been flaked on by a substitute for my classes when I was out of town, asking for help, and all you said was, "I have a date, but you sound troubled and like you need me so I can push that back. I'll do it. Because you're my friend." No lie. How great?

To the the friends that love me unconditionally, and forget the stupid things I do in the instant I do them.

To ALL my friends: I love you and am so grateful for you.

On friendship:

A good pal and I were recently talking about our histories with friends, and we have had similar experiences throughout recent years. We both have at some point in our lives decided that we have had good friends, but also bad ones (or not really bad, just not the greatest...). We know what it is like to be let down, and to be in need of a friend and they don't come through. Which is why we have both decided to be the best of friends we can be so as OUR friends never feel that way because of us. I really try to be there for my friends. If a friend called me in need, or even if they didn't call but I still know they need me or something is up, I want to be able to say I did everything I could to be there for them.

Friends come and friends go, but boy am I glad to have known all of those friends that have made an appearance in my life.

To friends!