I was contemplating leaving this for the end of the year, but I got my notification just this afternoon that everything here has been properly imported to the new place so I'm saying my farewells now.

I've been on LJ since 2003 and in the years since then, this place has served not only as a place to air my thoughts and ideas, fic, shenanigans and whathave you -- it has also been my home in this wide, wide world called the Internet. It's no small matter to say that this place had as much to do with my growing up as the rest of the stuff that's included in my life dear lord, what the hell is with that first entry, anyway.

Most of the time, when we refer to the Internet we say "online" and then for things not on the Internet we chuck them under the heading "Real Life". For me, both were/are real. It's just that sometimes, I go meet my friends for tea and cake at the mall or food strip, and then other times, I log in and join the crazy epic community that uses words and emoticons and gifs and links to supercede the fact that we have miles between us.

I made lots of friends here, gained confidence, learned to find my voice, lost myself along the way and then found myself all over again. For that, thanks, LJ.

Some things don't last forever, though.

In the same vein as the move that some other people are doing, I am officially migrating over to Dreamwidth. mlina will remain up and mostly intact provided LJ doesn't do anything that will prompt me to lock things wholesale. My stand on keeping my entries public remains the same, I'm just doing it somewhere else now.

If you have a Dreamwidth account and would like to keep in touch or reconnect, I would quite honestly love it if you added me up. My username is thelittleone. I have nothing to offer as a lure except myself and the amount of lulz I am capable of generating at any one time.

For those of you who don't have a Dreamwidth account but who would like to keep in touch anyway, I'd love it if you dropped on by. Like I said, the virtual doors of my new and spiffy home are wide open. I'm usually somewhere in the back, fixing stuff.

Merry Christmas, you guys. Hope to see you soon! --N.

Last Friday, Tropical Storm Sendong (International Name: Washi) made landfall in Northern Mindanao. While the typhoon has since exited the Philippine area of responsibility, the death toll in affected areas has risen to over 500.

One of these areas is the hometown of gilgrado, who some of you on my flist might be familiar with for her work on the Indie Comic, Life As Viciously Impossible. While Dan is safe, other families are not as fortunate.

The posters/information I have shared below have been cross-posted from twistedfork.tumblr.com and alekibutt.tumblr.com. If you could reblog/repost/share/spread the word, that would be amazing. If you could help contribute to the relief efforts, that would be even more fantastic.







Also, if anyone outside of the country is interested in helping, you can follow the link on this Tweet for more information.





MORE INFORMATION:
How to donate, voluntee for Sendong victims (via pinoytumblr.com)

Help for Typhoon Sendong Victims from Ateneo de Manila University (via ateneodemanilau @Twitter)


Retweet, Replurk, Reblog, Repost. Spread the word, donate what you can, contribute.

Again, I would greatly encourage anyone who is inclined to signal boost, to please do so. It will only take a minute of your time. Thank you.

her: people love you <3
me: i know
me: it makes me cry
me: like my heart is fit to burst
me: this year was a good year
me: it went by, really quickly
me: but this was a really good year
her: you see how precious you are to everyone?
her: never forget that
me: never
me: never again
me: it just
me: idk
me: you guys see me
me: you really _see me_
me: that means so much
me: haha noey such a ball of weepy
me: always a ball of flail and weepy
her: :)

me: i want it
me: really badly, sis
me: i want to make it
me: so badly
her: you WILL have it sis
her: i know it


I remember when Sis and I were high school brats passing letters to each other between periods because we could never seem to get the class lottery right. We were never in each other's classes in high school, never in the same groups when it came to the batch camping trip or whatever else. It makes me think a little about the rest of us; about the way the Universe has contingency plans because oh no, they have FOUND EACH OTHER.

Whenever I think of live musc in open spaces, it is always that evening in our senior year when she tells me to look up because she saw a falling star. We are both tired and come Monday we will have no voices to speak up in class. And in the midst of all that bittersweetness because we are fighting a little war between ourselves; a war that hurts because we love each other so much... I am happy. Happy to sit with her on the steps right outside the college department. Happy to rest my head on her shoulder.

We have had ridiculous ups and downs. There was even a time that we went without talking to each other for months. At one time, even more than a year. I have felt the whole range of emotions, both good and bad and we have raged at each other and cried buckets of tears and looked into our own abysses and come out alright.

And tonight she is at work and I am at home, but talking to her in a way that marries late night phone conversations that our parents used to yell at us because don't you girls have school tomorrow it is already past 3am and the letters we would pen to each other.

My half sits on the bookshelf, in a box that supports all my Holly Black books. I am not sure if Ketsana washed away the letters I gave her. I hope not, but that's a lot to hope for.



Today is a good day. The roosters are crowing in the distance and I swear, this neighborhood does not know the meaning of silence in the early hours (there goes a recording opportunity lost again because people keepn on vroom vrooming at three am). But yes. Today is a good day, even if the sun isn't up yet.



I should sleep soon. Presents shopping in Makati later and dinner with Judith either before/during/after the lights show in Ayala Triangle.

This comes late, because work sucks and my memory is even worse haha. But like they say, better late than never -- and somewhere in the world it is still the 14th.

Let's pretend I'm in a different timezone for the duration of this post.


My darling, dearest, beautiful bbgirl Marsky,

It's been less than a year since we were introduced but in the short span of time that I have been given the opportunity to get to know you bit by little bit, one thing is clear:

You are an inspiration and I am so privileged to have you in my life.

I am so proud of you, bbgirl. There are actually no words to express just how proud I am of all that you have accomplished. I just know that my heart feels fit to burst. You are a trooper, my love -- don't let anyone else tell you different. And when doubt sets in and you feel unsure, just remember that evening in Katipunan and then think about today. Right here and right now. Nothing ever worth having comes easy. More often, we lose sleep over the things that matter most to us; those dreams we cannot give up on. And if there is anything I am sure of, it is that you will get yours because you work hard and play even harder.

I linked this video on Plurk the other day, but I think it's only right that I link it again given the message of the song. Truth: I was listening to this on the way home from work tonight and I thought of you. We dreamers have to stick together. This is why we are family.



I love you. Very, very much. Happy, happy birthday, my love.


<3,
Mama

Posting this here. As a reminder. First received as a response to this week's offering: a cover of Matt Nathanson's "Kiss Quick".




Twin. How did I get so lucky to have you in my life at the right time?

cross-posted to the tumblog



So I go down to have brunch with Mom and as soon as I slice and dice my sunny side up she looks up from her book and says: “Oh, you have mail.”

I LOVELOVELOVE COMBO? mail. I love sending (though I don’t do this as much as I probably should hahaha… hah /)_-) and receiving mail because the Internet is wonderful and a brilliant way to keep in immediate touch but nglkjhsdfgkjntlkjhsdf actual physical mail that I can hold in my hands and turn over and keep.

Dear Philippine Post. Okay, maybe I like you a little better now. You see, this is why you need to stop eating people’s mail. Mail = happiness, okay?

It was a bit hilarious. The dogs nearly tripped me up when I made a dash for the table by our door where we keep stuff that comes in.

Anyway: the biggest envelope is from Umi and am just asldfkjhasldkjh BB WHAT IS THIS I FEEL SOMETHING INSIDE OF IT asldfkjhsdflkjh okay I will tie a ribbon around it and put it under the tree because asdfkljhasdlkj;sdlfkh.

The second one is from Hiei and I am resisting the urge to open it because it is a week to Christmas come Saturday and I want to hoard and hold off until then. And you will probably tell me that this is just a Christmas card but anything from you always makes me happy happy happy. The end.

The last one is kind of killing me, which is why I’m flailing at Twin right now because I have an idea of what it could be but those two are estimated for the 21st and asdflkjhaslfgkj :|

So I will go dig up a valid ID, sign off on this and pray I get this soon because Mom’s going to ask someone to pick it up on my behalf (lolworklifewhat).

Today is fantastic. This week. I think it will be fantastic.


P.S. How is everyone? Good, right?

Dear weather,

So you finally clued in that it's December, huh?

/gigglefit



【THE TIME CAPSULE MEME】


Leave me something? Link me yours, I'd love to leave something too.

LISTEN TO THE SONG | cross-posting from my tumblr


i should be turning in for the night. i have work in a couple of hours.

except that… i have all these emotions running through me right now.

there are days when i am very bad with words. these days are usually when they matter the most; when i really, really want to say something and have people get what it is i’m trying to express.

days that i’m afraid i’ll say them wrong and then no one except me will understand what it is i wanted to put down. because it means to much to get it right. to reach out and say: hey. you mean the world to me.

i had a conversation with one of my longest and oldest friends earlier yesterday aftenoon. she and i have known each other since we were kids hammering out songs on two different pianos in an auditorium that is there still, but not quite the same. our conversation went like this:


Her: one song can change you
not everyone gets to go to narnia
you know
some of us get to listen to a song
or a band
or read something
and get transformed
while being in the same place
it may take months?
but it’s pretty much
the equivalent of any change you can find in a story book
i don’t know if i’m making sense
but

Me: no you are
and i am a mess at work
haha my makeup
(don’t say sorry)

Her: i just know that things can change you
when people can’t reach you

Me: (i put this on so that the damn thing could be ruined)

Her: ahahah, make-up
there is nothing wrong or weird with wanting to tell them
that their song made things happen for you
there is nothing wrong with having to sing it
there is nothing wrong with being touched


=====


months ago, a health scare in the family got me thinking: it’s been over a decade, noelle grace. maybe you’ve got it all wrong. maybe you… maybe you’re pushing for something too hard. something that’s not meant to happen. maybe you should just stop and give up. set aside that keyboard. put away the words you match to the white and black keys.

and then. well. hey. the universe throws a curveball in the guise of five amazing boys. and then something somehow clicks into place. and you realize: you can’t. not yet.

how can you when you see them push and push and go out there, focused on their dreams. how can you say that you find them that amazing and not try.

again. and again. and again. until you get to where you need to be.

so, yeah. no cover this week from me.

just a thank you. and a song.


=====


[original] “SALISI”
music: Noelle Pico ; lyrics: Noelle Pico, Mags Forto

just like a wake-up call two seconds too soon
when i am startled out of sleeping and washed over in blue
and my heart’s chasing this unnamed, fleeting feeling
that’s gone off there with the evening
as the sun peeks all over you

and like a half-remembered dream i keep on thinking
that i’ve messed up all the details that brought together truth
and this ‘we’ of ours, a word left untranslated
i wish i’d seen it, i would have seized it
freeze-framed it so i wouldn’t have had to fall

it was all sleight of hand, accidental trick,
this crime of opportunity,
my pockets emptied of affections
i cannot really afford to really feel
and what is worse is i can’t blame you,
i can’t get mad or even shame you
for an unintended something
that neither of us would have known

and i wonder do you see a half-made memory of me
your eyes, that smile, your voice — calling out my name
and i — i wonder how it’s fair at all to want to say goodbye

we’ll chalk it up to déjà vu
this love from me
to the ghost of you
and me and everything
that we could have
ever tried to be

let’s not define ourselves
by what we’re not,
maybe one day
we’ll time it right
but for now let’s breathe
and let go
at the count of three

I've always loved this poem. I try to live by it.



Not doing covers this week. It's high time I get back on the horse for real.

Strange, the things that motivate us. That propel us forward even if they sometimes hurt.