moriendum est

(from here)

1. Scrounge for change (couch, ashtray, etc.) to make a purchase?
it's been a long, looooong time... the last time I had cash in my wallet was maybe at the start of the pandemic, so even longer for coins. it's all digital now.

2. Visit a dentist?
december! or... wait, was it january? I thought I had written about it here but I can't find the post now...? anyway, it was recent-ish! for the first time in my life I heard that I need braces (not gonna get them, sorry) lol and something I already knew, that I grind my teeth like crazy. also not gonna address that now, thank you very much.

3. Make a needed change to your life?
for the last few months I've been trying to do some minimal skincare (?!) and also being a little more patient with my hair. I even bought a hair dryer this month! crazy stuff happening, never thought I'd see the day.

4. Decide on a complete menu well in advance of the evening meal?
I don't usually have dinner but last week I decided three days prior that I would order pizza on friday lol

5. Spend part of the day (other than daily hygiene) totally/mostly naked?
maybe last month? to sleep!

*debatable

jokes aside though, I'm glad I managed to accomplish what I set out to do with the deobi fic exchange fic. I was actually a pinch-hitter! so that was fun, especially because I got some great prompts to work with. the result was milcob royal au, with soft-spoken prince jacob and devoted guard/knight hyunjae. the actual prompt asked only for the tags childhood friends + power imbalance + prince/royal knight, the plot itself was all brainworms on my part.

and that was invigorating, because for a while there, I was a little too... empty-headed. stress, and the whole situation with tbz last year, and just not really having the passion to create made it so I barely wrote anything for the second half of 2025. as usual, fests are a great motivator because I'd rather eat dirt than lose a fest deadline - after losing many deadlines years ago due to self-confidence issues, now I *know* I can do it, and I don't want to leave people hanging, so I do my best to deliver despite everything.
( thoughts on the fic )

I came across this essay on heated rivalry and thought it was nice, so I'm linking it here too: Heated Rivalry and the Art of Anti-Dystopia

last time I mentioned I was gonna watch HR, right? well, I did. in like, three days. I had to marathon the last episodes because they were SO GOOD. it started a bit okayish to me, I couldn't quite grasp the vibes for the first two episodes, and paused halfway through scott's (I was dreading heartbreak and gloominess, basically), but the second half ot that episode, and then episode 3, pulled me in. episode 4 was flawless and episode 5 had me yelling. so I definitely loved the show!

and while I've never ventured into hockey rpf tags, I've read enough m/m smut to be thoroughly amused watching the tropes and cliché lines in a TV show format. so this is what all the one direction fic adaptations felt like to people who read 1D fic???!!! because it was cute! and so well done, all things considered. (I never expect much respect for the original material in adaptations like these, but I guess the people behind this show really believed in this story. for good reason!) of course shane says "I have a thing" and ilya is like "what thing?" and shane is embarrassed to say "A DILDO, OK?". that's peak ao3 fic!!! of course one of them has a momager and the other has a difficult relationship with his parents, of course the last episode includes an awkward lunch with shane's parents asking awkward questions and a "your boyfriend is here" "my boyfriend?" dialogue, and of course the queer guys have hot, badass women friends who aren't written maliciously. excellent, 10/10. my fic reader heart is happy.

the essay adds a valid point, though: this show is a hopeful one. scott wasn't an asshole (like I feared he might be for a good chunk of his episode), kip didn't suffer any tragic accidents, ilya had a complex backstory, shane was the actual best player for the entirety of the show. it wasn't a coffee shop au because there were real, complex issues being discussed, but it wasn't grimdark either. and GOD, that's truly such a breath of (canadian) fresh air, indeed.
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(title refers to this banger of an opening)

there's been a lot of me questioning why I like some stuff and dislike some other stuff lately. I guess I've been trying to figure out what I like as a rule so that I don't need to venture out of my bubble too often, but I've also been such a hater that I'm just like... mhm. interesting! I wonder why the entire world loves this thing I find mediocre at best! why do I dislike it, anyway? which in turn makes me wonder why I like something too.

case in point: I'm a casual enjoyer of critical role. it's a piece of media I really, really enjoy, sort of a comforting thing I have on the side, somewhere I can take refuge in when I'm not in the mood for anything else, or when I'm REALLY in the mood to watch the +4 hours long episodes. I've been watching the campaigns for nine-ish years? oh my god, nine years?! and that's it, I don't (or rarely) engage with the fandom or with fanon content aside from fanart.

tlovm, though? eh.
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it's christmas, I've eaten too much to sleep just yet, so lemme just do all of these at once lol

#22 - a song you think everybody should listen to

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#23 - a song no one would expect you to love

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#24 - a song that reminds you of summertime

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#25 - a song that makes you laugh

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#26 - a song you love from the 70s

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#27 - a song you wish you could play

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#28 - a song you listen to when you're happy

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#29 - a song that makes you think about life

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#30 - a song that describes you

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