north-40 . mechanica . We Killed the Hubble . friends . userinfo
FFFFUUUUUUUUUU--
- You know what's the most unbelievably painful thing? Trying to do Brazilian jiu jitsu with an ovary the size of a baseball. Yeah. I know pain is supposed to be your body telling you to slooow dooown, but when I'm aware that it's not something that's actively trying to kill me, I have a hard time doing that. Did you know I was ready to start MMA training back in 2006? I just had to solidify my job situation and get some health things in order, and I'd tentatively scheduled the end of that summer as my start date. And then I woke up one weekend in April thinking my appendix was trying to explode, got diagnosed with endometriosis, rapidly declined, had surgery, moved to another town, and spent the better part of 3 years apathetic on pain meds instead of doing something productive with my free time. Didn't actually get around to joining a team until early 2009.
So...I'm a bit stubborn/angry/stupid when it comes to slacking on the mats because of gonads and strife. Injuries, sure, I'll take it easy. Infectious diseases, no way I want to give that to my teammates, so I'll stay away. Gut pain? No. Fuck that. I'm gonna be rolling, even if simply doing drills feels like I'm being torn apart. Fuck you, gut pain. I'm over being controlled by you. Go to hell.
...and then I ended up in the ER because I couldn't deal with it anymore, and not being able to sleep past it meant I got a vicious cold that stole my voice and took me out of the office for several days. I'm exhausted as hell. It's been over 2 weeks -- this shit can go away any time now. Would be pleased if it did so soon, before I talk someone into punching me in the pelvis until the cyst bursts so I can get on with my life without being hunched over and high on vicodin every day. I don't think that's too much to ask. -
Launched Friday, the 8th of July, @ 11:50 AM
- GUTUPDATE
Apparently the combined contraceptive pill can cause strokes? I mean, duh. Of course you knew that. It's all over the literature for The Pill, practically part of a black box warning and everything. But when you're under 35 and a non-smoker (and have a Mysterious Past, lulz), nobody brings it up with any seriousness.
Until you have a full-scale aura-and-blind-spots migraine after changing pill formulas. Apparently that's bad on the "SWEET MERCIFUL FUCK, STOP TAKING THE PILL RIGHT NOW" level. I'd probably have been less concerned, but two women I know ended up hospitalized with clot-tastic embolisms in the past month, and I am so not fucking around with that.
Which means no more estrogens for me! Just progestins. Taking a progestin-only pill for 3 months to see if it handles the endo symptoms, and if it works, I can go with one of the more long-term dosage progestin delivery systems (shot, implant, or IUD). Apparently the downside to the progestin-only pill is that it has to be taken at the same time every day, +/- no more than 2 hours. We'll see how that goes. Technically, I'm supposed to be doing the same thing with my other medications anyway, but it's the sort of thing where they get taken at the same time on weekdays, but weekends are a big lazy crap-shoot. You know that whole "go to bed and get up at the same time every day, even on weekends" thing? I guess I should try that, huh? Bleh.
In other medical news, seeing a physical therapist for my hand. (She has a very subtle Canadian accent. Heeeeee.) Now I play with this neon-orange putty goop 3 times a day, and she gives me an ultrasound massage once a week to try and break up any scar tissue and adhesions that have formed in the joint. Exciting shit, I know. Have no idea how long it'll take to get things back to normal, though. Well, my normal, which I'm starting to learn is a lot different from other people's normal. It's like:
"See, my finger only does this."
"And your problem is..?"
"It should do THIS. All the way from here to here and back again, plus some of this in between."
"Are you sure that's what it should be doing?"
"Well, the same finger on the other hand does this."
"Holy crap!"
"Except that's not my dominant hand, so the fuxx0red one should be like that but moreso."
"Right. Well, we'd better get started, eh?"
"Shit yes we should." - 1 Frequency
Launched Tuesday, the 21st of June, @ 10:34 AM
- work_Susan's printer stopped working, and she said she "heard through the grapevine" that another legal assistant's printing was down. That lead to the following exchange of YouTube videos:
Timeline:
Scott: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZe9OtFNt_8
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pM2OK_JaJ9I ("I see your CCR and raise you...")
Susan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hajBdDM2qdg ("No, the classic.")
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kn481KcjvMo ("You just went all-in and won.")
Susan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bESGLojNYSo
Scott: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xy5JwYOlgvY
Susan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vNk4K3YaIc
Scott: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCDIYvFmgW8
Susan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgZOYt5kH9Q
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcsW9pdSKMs
Scott: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kokm6ACqvB8
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OcsW9pdSKMs
...after which, work_Susan emailed, "I CAN PRINT!!!"
Our work here is done. -
Launched Thursday, the 16th of June, @ 9:30 AM
fenrirvallin: LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE. I AM GETTING NOTHING ACCOMPLISHED AT WORK TODAY BECAUSE OF YOOOU.
(Context, for those of you who aren't Fenrir: There's a new SSX game coming out. He just sent me the info last night. I am giddy with fangirlish glee, as SSX3 is arguably my favorite game evar, and this one seems like a proper return to form for the franchise.)
( Videos and links beneath the cut for courtesy's sake:Collapse )
...well, technically, I'm getting nothing done because of SSX. Which is also your fault. Srsly, from the beginning? Your fault. Me buying a PS2? Your fault because YOU were playing motherfucking SSX3 that one evening, and I didn't even PLAY it, and I went back to Bozeman and bought a goddamn PS2 the next fucking day JUST FOR THIS GAME YOU WERE PLAYING ON A TINY TV IN THE DARK FOR LIKE AN HOUR. That's probably why my college GPA went to shit, and why my hand tendons are all torn to shreds, and why I spent good fucking money on SSX FUCKING BLUR, WHICH IS FUCKING TERRIBLE, BY THE WAY, AND OH YEAH, I DON'T EVEN OWN A WII IN THE FIRST PLACE. Also, On Tour? Mediocre, but I bought it anyway. Oh, and I bought a copy of SSX3 for the Xbox for...well, no good reason. Probably because I had better output cables or something on the Xbox and wanted to play on my parents' giant HDTV. Gonna admit that was worthwhile, though.
Anyway. ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT. THANKS, ASSHOLE. <3- 2 Frequencies
Launched Wednesday, the 8th of June, @ 11:21 AM
- Got a fair bit I could write right now, but I don't really have the energy.
Short version: the endometriosis is back in full force. The meds I've been taking since late 2008 quit working sometime in March, and I've since had two of the most brutal periods of my life. Considering what the previous ones were like, that's saying something. Thought at first it was an anomaly, maybe related to missing two pills in a row or taking antibiotics or whatever, but apparently it's not. And that's, well, it's bad. On multiple levels. Am worried about getting called in front of a firing squad at work, seeing as I've been an utter bitch between the pain, the exhaustion, and wanting to fucking kill everything that pisses me off, which currently includes everything in the fucking world. And I've had to avoid practice, seeing as I can barely stand up straight and am losing an unconscionable quantity of blood (and not just from my uterus -- OMG TMI LOL -- and I'm not apologizing for telling the world that cuz, LOL, I'm an utter bitch right now).
Have I mentioned lately that none of this shit should be allowed to happen without actually killing a person? Cuz srsly. These shouldn't be run-of-the-mill symptoms. I should be in the fucking hospital, except, oh wait, this shit is routine. Because...endometriosis. LOL. There's no fucking cure, or even an established treatment regimen, but there's pills for boners! GOD FORBID DUDES CAN'T GET BONERS! THE WORLD WOULD END, DON'TCHA KNOW, WITHOUT TURGID FUCKING COCKS!
There's a secondary rant here in support of Planned Parenthood, who have been far more awesome than every fucking OB/GYN I've seen since I started fucking puberty, but again...tired. And under-medicated. I wasn't aware someone could run out of several prescriptions worth of Tylenol #3, naprosyn, and Vicodin in under a week when they're specifically taking it for therapeutic purposes and not to get high (SURPRISING, I KNOW, GIVEN THAT IT'S ME AND ALL), but it seems that can happen. Wow. Magic. Kinda, only not.
AND I JUST GOT A GODDAMN SEXY NEW GI, AND I'M NOT USING IT BECAUSE I'M TOO SICK TO FUNCTION, WHAT THE MAD FUCK, PEOPLE.
I'm seeing a GYN on Monday, and hopefully will get on a new plan that might kill the symptoms again. Fingers crossed.
Sorry for the emo bullshit post, but...I'm not dealing with this well at all. Will try to keep from being a fucking downer in the next post, I swear. - 4 Frequencies
Launched Sunday, the 1st of May, @ 12:32 AM
