Little girl: I’m gonna… I’m gonna cut off your head with a knife!
Mother, shocked: Where did you hear that kind of language?!
Little girl: Ummm, I don’t know…
Mother: You must have heard it somewhere!
Little girl: I made it up! … Is pepperoni meat?
Mother: Yes.
–Oceanside, California
Overheard by: kafrin
- Posted on
- California, Moms, Should've used a condom, Threats
Little girl, playing in pool at hotel: Nana, what beach are we at?
Older woman: Myrtle beach.
Little girl: Murder beach!
Rest of kids in pool: Murder beach! We're at murder beach!
Little boy: Hey, let's play murder beach. I'll kill you and rob your dead body!
–Myrtle Beach, South Carolina
Overheard by: Marisa English
- Posted on
- Uncategorized
Salty sea dog: And the new LED Christmas lights? They’ll never burn down your Christmas tree. You’ll have to do that yourself.
–Morro Bay, California
Overheard by: Colin
Girl #1: Don’t go skinny dipping here.
Girl #2: Why not? That blind person is the only guy around.
Blind guy: I’m blind, not deaf. Now I can use the sound of your voice to project an image of you naked in my head. [He pauses for a moment.] It’s not pretty.
–Westhampton Beach, Long Island, New York
Overheard by: amanda fox
Man on cell: Yeah, Paul* and I aren't friends anymore. He used my credit card and owes me $4000. Plus, it probably doesn't help that I've been having sex with his mom… repeatedly.
–Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Amused Passenger
- Posted on
- Family, Guys, Money, On the phone, Relationships, Sex, Wisconsin
Blond waitress to patron: I’m like one of those, you know. The kind that don’t make mistakes.
–Santa Monica Pier, Santa Monica, California
- Posted on
- Baristas, California, Compare and contrast, Compliments, Guys
Teenage girl: I can't wait to get a tattoo on my lower back.
Tween boy #1: Why would you want a tattoo there? How are you going to be able to see it?
Tween boy #2: It's not for her, stupid, it's for the dudes she lets do her in the butt doggy-style.
–St. Simon's Island, Georgia
Overheard by: John
- Posted on
- Ass, Backdoor, Body parts, Georgia, Insults, Physical Appearance, Questions, Teens, Tweens, Wishes
Tiny mullet kid: Spank the hiney! Spank the hiney!
Surfer passerby: Spank the hiney? Awesome!
–Robert Moses Beach, New York
- Posted on
- Ass, Glad the condom broke, New York, Stoners
