Updates

My blogging seems to have slipped even further down my prioirity list.
Having problems with blogger makes it a chore, its so hard to get in now my browser isn't supported by blogger and I won't be forced to change to 7, not until I absolutely have to, and I won't change to Chrome either.  I hate being told what to do, especially by a computer generated message. Well, thats my gripe over.
Not a lot has happened - had my gall bladder out at the end of November, not quite a painless procedure but I was very surprised how little pain I had and how I was problem free after it, no expected shoulder pain and I can eat almost everything I ate before apart from pastry items and red meat.  It did take a while for my appetite to come back and I have found a lot of food I no longer like anymore.
Crafting, I've been very prolific in the flower department and the rabbits are breeding like mad.  Got orders for two which is good.  Lally Long Legs and Stacey made the front cover of Lets Get Knitting. They had the cover all to themselves and it seems like they are letting the fame go to their heads, the poor snowmen (one who had to share the front cover of Handmade last year) have copped a lot of flack off them.  The bunnies and little petal flower grub dolls are getting excited in the hope that one day they will grace a front cover too.  I've told them not to get their hopes up as I'm thinking of not submitting the designs. 

I had a good amount of orders for the snowmen before christmas and a couple for the dolls so that paid for presents and food,
Christmas came and went, I really still didn't have an appetite so dinner was just a festive ham salad and I actually spent less on food for the christmas period than I would for a normal weekly shop. All the presents were hand crafted and not one complaint, all was gratefully received.  So all in all it was a very frugal christmas. 
My car broke down three times before christmas - I got a new radiator as my chrissy pressie off the sons (it beats the year befores new toilet cistern) and a new alternator belt.
The new alternator belt snapped a couple of weeks ago so I had to bite the bullet and take it in to the local mechanic - $200 later my car is hopefully fixed.
My health is on the up and up, I feel great, the weight is still coming off, a bit too slowly but at least I can see a difference.  I have five big piles of clothes to go to the op-shops, I've dropped 2 dress sizes so far and need to buy new clothes.  But being the tighta*** that I am I will see what the op-shop has in, no point buying new clothes form the stores until I finally get down to my goal weight, unless of course i see something I really like and it is in the sale. 
I'd better get a wiggle on and get outta here, need to dump all this op-shop stuff in town and do a quick trawl of the said op-shops for other stuff.  I decided to take down my old curtains and I need new to me ones, I've changed all the sheers over (unfortunately it also means I have to wash the windows), oh well, its all exercise.

Uhru

Jan

rants,,,,,,,

I used to be a really prolific blogger, was always on facebook, even considered tweeting. But now I seem to have slowed down, Facebook does my head in and the finches and honeyeaters in the tree outside my window are the only things that are tweeting.
My thoughts, feelings, emotions and inspirations stay locked away. OKay, sometimes I do waffle - mainly about everyday things, the weather, my craft. But I've come to realise that in the past I needed to post, I didn't care who read them, it was purely for my benefit. They were words and feelings that I needed to get out, they helped me look at things differently.
I also realise after rereading my blogs that a lot of feelings and emotions (and yes,fears also) are no longer with me, try as I might I cannot feel those emotions. I have let go of so many things. 
Occassionally I do slip back, mainly into worry, but then I give myself a good talking to and let it go. Usually its over money and bills or the car. Things that are material, things I can do something about.  I think about the past and the worst things that could happen to me, and they have happened and I coped, most importantly I survived, so not being able to pay the phone bill on time or having to seriously budget for the next couple of months is no biggy. 
I understand my kids now have their own lives, they are making their own mistakes, I have released them.  They are on their own journeys.  But they all know that I will be here for support if they need it.  My friends are important to me, I appreciate every one. I am so lucky to have good friends, each one of them is different and brings something special to my life.  But I hope they understand that occassionally I like my own company.
My love life is non-existant, if someone comes along and sweeps me off my feet, thats fine.
I've had my big romance, my one true love, the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with so its hard to imagine feeling that way about anybody else again. I'm only just getting used to being on my own finally. I have to take care of myself for a while, but I don't want to become so independant that I can't let anyone else in to my life.
Health - well, thats taken another battering.  I finally found out what was causing the chest pains and stomach burning and pains in my back, not my heart but my gall-bladder, lots of gall-stones. So the whole lot has to come out at the end of November.  I'm keeping to a low-fat or no-fat diet, extremely low-fat.  The weight is coming off and now I have practically eliminated dairy from my diet I am feeling full of beans.  I do miss my cheese though.  No-fat cottage cheese on a rice cake just doesn't do what a cheese toasty used to do. 
So thats your up-date, boring I know. I'm happy with my life, I'm so glad to be still alive to be able to have the odd whinge or two about silly trivial things. I'm open to what the future will bring and accept it all with open arms. Bring it on.........

Jan

July 2011 update

Apologies for not updating more often.  I wish I could say I had been so busy I just didn't have the time to write.
I have been busy though being creative, but not that busy.

 

Nothing has changed - apart from my hair colour. Two times in three months I have had trips to the hair dressers.  I don't think I have ever gone to the hairdresser two times in a year EVER. 

The photo on the left was done in april, can't see the grey wings very much but they are there. The photo on the right was done a couple of weeks ago, grey all gone and almost the same red as my hair used to be many years ago (its natural colour). I've never had straight hair, its always been wild and wavy but I love my hair straighteners. It took a bit of getting used to, some days I am in the mood for straight and some for wavy, in fact some days start off wavy and then end up straight.  Two weeks to my birthday, I'll be 53 and I'm actually looking forward to it..Life has been pretty good these past few months, lots of itty bitty things happening, enjoyable things, scary things and  unpredictable things. 

I hope the next year will be full of nice surprises, I can handle nice surprises.

Jan

Another grey day......

.......well it might be grey outside but inside flowers are bursting out all over - crochet ones that is.  I am on a roll, my mojo is definately back fulll time.  I have a selection of baby beanies with humongous roses on them, garlands  of pretty little daisies entwined around the bookcase and curtain rails, my curtains in the bedroom are now decorated with full blown aqua coloured roses, the dining table looks like florist had chopped all the heads of her blooms and scattered them randomly over the table cloth.   The coffee table by my chair has crochet cotton in every colour, my hooks are stuck into the holes of the throw that is over the back of my chair, multi-coloured orts (?) are all over the carpet, the dog is biting my toes cos I have forgotten to feed her, heck, I've even forgotten to feed myself.
I've just discovered the african flower motif and despite telling myself NO I have started making a cushion cover in cotton.  It is soooo pretty, but I have to discipline myself and get the ordered hats finished and make some flower brooches for a neighbours shop.
But before I do all that I suppose I'd better feed the dog.

A pinch and a punch......

I am being lazy today and I am not feeling the slightest bit guilty over it.   The day is grey, miserable and windy and as I typed that the clouds parted and a tiny bit of blue appeared.
Instantly, my mood has lifted.
I'm a bit incapicitated at the moment, I forgot to bend at the knees, I knew as i was doing it that I was going to rue it, was I arrogantly tempting fate by doing it.  I knew as I felt that ping and twang that I'd done it again.  Straightening up I felt okay then the tell tale niggle in my lower back as I finished off the cleaning.  So I forced myself to pack in what I was doing and take it easy.  I cancelled a job I had to do over in the next town to another day and settled down to an afternoon of crafting.
Feeling a bit better yesterday so I did the job I should have done tuesday, finished off the mopping in the holiday home, went for a walk, picked up my new XD card for my camera, went to the library and had a friend over for a visit. 
Backs eased up slightly today, I can actually straighten up fully now.  I had a great nights sleep and have nothing that has to be done today.  So I am going to read few blogs, finish off a couple of the flower garlands, make a couple more beanies and perhaps make a scarf or two.  I might even put some soup on in the slow cooker - lets hope I don't do what I did last week and forgot to turn the thing on with a casserole inside it, sort of defeats the object a bit.
Well that little patch of blue has disappeared, doesn't look promising for the markets tomorrow. 

Just an old piccy of a blue sky so I don't forget what one actually looks like.

Jan

The year has half gone

........I could tell you everything that has been going on in my life but why don't you pop over to my other blog and read about it there instead.

I've been very scattered recently, unable to put my mind to any one thing, I get bursts of enthusiasm with my crafting and then it goes as quickly as it came.  But these past few weeks I have been getting fired up over things.
I've loosened the purse strings up a bit and actually have treated myself to a few new things, I've spent so long just 'getting by', its been good to have a spend.  I actually bought nail polish - quite a few bottles and had highlights put in my hair.  I'm off to get it cut this week as well.  For some reason I seem to have this thing about buying new underwear - I just love the feel of the pants with aloe vera in them, they are so soft and comfortable, so when I see them on special I buy two or three pairs -  I have now amassed a pair for every day of the month......and not one pair could be called anything like 'sexy' - they are granny knickers. Is this a sign of getting old - going for comfort. Oh well, I suppose it had to happen sooner or later.
I am pondering wether to spend the rest of the day sat out in the warmth of the back porch and crochet more flowers or sit in the cold house, rugged up and watch a movie.  Maybe I'll do both.  I had thought it was a lot later than this, it feels like way past lunch time, buts its only just gone morning tea time.  So I' will go outside and sit with my hooks and yarn and then come inside once the sun gets round that side of the house and warms up the living room.

about time for another post......

.......phew, time certainly is flying.  Like the last post its a beautiful day today. The sky is blue and the birds are singing, bees are buzzing and the grass is growing.  But, give it an hour or two and it will be thundering and lightning and windy.  I've been out and weeded, very carefully around the raised beds, always aware that there could be snakes hiding out in the rockery walls.  I've done a bit of pruning, cleaned the barbeque table so a I can bring it outside to use in my craftroom. 
The dreaded nightsweats are back with a vengeance, so glad I sleep on my own now (apart from the dog), I toss and turn all night and then when I do finally get to sleep I have dreams where I am constantly getting lost. Last night/early morning I was running through a huge university complex that was joined onto a huge amusement park. There were all these tunnels underneath full of las vegas type gambling rooms and pokies.  I was late for class and couldn't find my way to the uni part.  There was a beach off a promenade but the sea was out and there was a heavy mist covering the edge of the sand.  There was also a huge shopping mall with all these olde worlde shabby chic type shops, I longed to go look at them but I knew I would get into trouble with my teacher. Then this man who looked a bit like a smaller version of mick jagger took my hand and said he understood and could help me get back to where I needed to be.  He patted me on the bum (which felt very strange) and then he disappeared and I was left lost again.  I woke up went to the loo and after falling back asleep I was back in the dream again.  This time there was a large train station and a dock area, I was running up and down stairs trying to get to the right floor.  I had a pizza in my bag and I wanted to eat it but I knew if I brought it out everybody would want some, so rather than share I hid it away and went hungry.  When I finally woke up I was wide awake, it felt like mid morning, it sounded like mid-morning but it was only six thirty.  My friend phoned up to let me know she wasn't going to come into town so I made my breakfast and went back to bed.
I've just pottered around all day, doing little bits of things. I might even go have a nanny nap shortly, the dogs already curled up on the bed asleep.  But I have no-one to worry about, no-one to cater for except myself (and the dog) so I think I might just chill out and be lazy.

Uhru

Jan

The sun is shining

No more wet washing hanging all over the place. Scurried round this morning and found all the things that needed washing, who knows how the long the sun is going to be here for.
It felt so good to have that sun on my back as I was pegging the first two loads out. Dare I strip the beds........no, I think that would be tempting fate a little, its good enough that all the towels are out there flapping away in the breeze.

Birthday boy this morning was stamping round the house, muttering and whinging about something. If kids can divorce their parents can parents divorce their kids.  23 years ago my waters broke right in the middle of making breakfast,  told my eldest to run up stairs and tell his dad my waters had broke, he came down the stairs muttering something like "clumsy thing, what have you broken now", the look on his face when he saw me bent over in agony and standing in a puddle was priceless. Grab me a nappy I shouted, he returned with a disposable. I hammered on the wall for my neighbour, she came running in her skimpy nighty and her wrist all bandaged up, hubby running all over the house packing bags and yelling. The phone rang, it was a mate who had just had his  shop window smashed in and needed help replacing it, hubby yelled at him that I had gone into labour and get off the phone. Meanwhile neighbour had phoned the ambulance and was standing in the front garden to wave it down.  I had phoned a friend and arranged for her to have liam till his grandparents could get there, I was standing in the front room with everything I needed. Hubby is still running around, ambulance turns up and tries to cart off the neighbour since she's pacing and in pain from a what we found out later was a broken wrist after a fall the night before.  The ambulance man panics, since I'm in labour and he has never had to deliver a baby.  All the streets out wondering what on earth is going on.  I calmly climb in the ambulance and say right come on then, lets get this baby born. Hubby follows in car as soon as friend picks up son.  Then it hits me, this baby is going to be nearly 7 weeks early, I can't have it now, it has to stay in there and cook a bit more.
Picture Dr. Dreamy from Greys, picture two student midwives drooling over Dr. Dreamy, one panicing hubby and one woman in labour who is also drooling over Dr. Dreamy in between contractions. Picture a husband who is rushing back and forth between his wife in labour and fitting new shop windows.  Out pops baby, its a boy, snatched away from me before I can even look at him and whisked up to SCBU.  Hubby follows baby and leaves me to Dr Dreamy and the two young students who in their eagerness to both hand him the stuff for stitching me together knock everything all over the floor.  He's busy apologising, I'm saying its nothing, don't worry about it. One clean up and a cup of tea later and I'm being wheeled up to see my little boy.  Blond fuzz on his head and looking like a giant next to all the other tiny babies, 2.2 kg at birth, not bad for  7 weeks early.  He was all wired up with connections and tubes but he was beautiful.   Nows he's 23, 6ft 2in and still cute and he has a mum who right at this minute is really annoyed he woke her at 5.30 a.m. but who is still going to bake him a big chocolate birthday cake.

RETURN OF THE MOJO..........

Finally at last and lets hope its back to stay, I missed it so much. I have dabbled but with my heart not in it, my joy had gone from humble stitchings.  The pleasure I got from creating was fleeting, it didn't last. I had to push myself to get anything finished. It was a chore.

This month I have made 30 hats for the Guardian/Salvo's Homeless Appeal along with finishing off three pairs of gloves, 2 blankets and three scarfs to add to the Appeal.  I decided that since the gingham blanket would never get finished because I couldn't get the colours anymore I would leave it as lap rug size, so it is officially off the UFO list and sits over the back of the sofa adding a splash of bright colour to the room.

The yarn stash has been depleted - over 2000 grams of yarn used in the making of the hats and the blankets. Some of the little bits have been used to make little flowers.

I've been designing new stitcheries for christmas and I'm well into stitching up the second one, I'm going to do two more - so it will be a series of 4, well maybe 5.  Can't tell you what they are yet but I will be submitting them for publication in a couple of weeks so it could be a while before they meet the general public. I have so many ideas flying round amongst all the garbage in my head I need to do a bit of space clearing up there.   Maybe now would be a good time to get myself organised once and for all. 

I have to get myself a job, I've been cold-canvassing myself around town and had only one business get back to me - Not now sorry, try later in the year.  I find it so demeaning having to phone businesses up, I'm no good as selling myself and I never know what to say, speaking of which I'd better get back to it and not leave it till the last minute before I have to see my job counselor. 

Jan

SNIFFLES AND SNUFFLES

I need to drag this aching bod of mine off to the shops, I need loo rolls, tissues, vicks vapodrops and I have to post a letter (I know its saturday but I need to get the letter in the box before I forget).  I managed to fold and put away a weeks worth of washing, made my bed, put the pots away and thats it.  I might make a lasagne for dinner with the left over bolognese that Matt made last night or I might just leave it and he can finish it off however he wants.  I can't taste anything anyway.  I'll be happy with just toast.  I might just go out for a short drive by the lake, clear out the cobwebs and get some fresh air. 

Jan