Parent and sex educator Catalina is in a terrible situation. Long story grossly oversimplified, Catalina used to work for a school that is now trying to use her daughter's future as a pawn for what I view as emotional blackmail and thinly veiled extortion. (You can read about the full situation here. )

Anyway, she's running a raffle to raise money. The grand prize is one of three limited edition three 5×7 museum signed prints by lochai. (His work is nothing short of stunning). Catalina helped Lochai organize a similar fund raiser so he could launch his exhibition at the World Erotic Arts Museum. The prints are from that exhibition. (Above links NSFW)

One of the other prizes is a custom necklace and earring set lovingly hand crafted by yours truly.

So buy raffle tickets, damnit! I'm looking forward to having a new jewelry project.

Buy raffle tickets here.

They're 10 dollars each.

1. There are 25 horses. Each horse runs at a unique constant speed. You would like to determine which are the three fastest horses. You are allowed to race 5 at a time. You cannot time the races; you can only observe relative order of finish. What is the minimum number of races necessary to identify the top 3 with certainty? How?


2. You are given the opportunity to play a game that begins by flipping a fair coin. If it comes up tails, you lose. If the first flip comes up heads, your prize is $2 and the coin is flipped again.

The game continues until tails comes up, and your prize doubles on every flip, paying out when tails appears. So, for the sequence "heads, tails" you are paid $2 and for "heads, heads, heads, tails" you are paid a total of $8.

What is the Expected Value (EV) of this game (the amount you should mathematically expect to win or lose for each dollar risked)?

How much would you pay to be able to play this game one time?

Crafts are the way my mom and I bond, as I think I've mentioned. So on Saturday, my mom and I met up in midtown and pillaged a couple of bead stores for shiny things. And oh the shiny things that there are! I really need to start selling some of my necklaces...

Mom bought pretty crystal beads and pretty pearlescent beads and really cool thread. The two of us were like kids with a blank check in a candy store. When Dad picked us up, he saw our bags of beads and rolled his eyes. So yesterday, I picked up a dress for my cousin's upcoming wedding, and spent hours beading. I even experimented with a new necklace design.

( Behold the fruits of my labor!Collapse )

The green one was the last one I made. It matches the dress I'll be wearing to Justin's wedding. As I was going to bed, my mother was calling after me, suggesting the various color combos I can use for the necklace. Eventually I had to cut her short so I could go to bed... I didn't. I stayed up till 4 AM beading without realizing it. Oops...

*sigh* I've become an addict.

So apparently, I'm in arib's subconscious trying to break into a seder.

Especially strange since I have not actually seen or hung out with arib in, like, five million years.

How odd.

I value ____________________ in the people I'm close to.

This afternoon, I stopped by a cosmetic/drug store by my house to pick up some dishwashing fluid and some other sundry items. When I walked in the door, I was greeted by a small team of sales reps, passing out flyers for the various sales they had going on.

I thought nothing of it and headed towards the detergent aisle. As I was browsing, a soft voice came from behind... in Russian.

"Devushka, you know we have a sale going on today, so if you buy this lavender detergent, you get a free gift." The lady to whom thie voice belonged shoved yet another flyer under my nose.

I thanked her and kept on shopping. Time to buy dishwashing fluid. I picked up a bottle of Fairy cleaner... And the voice came from behind me again.

"You know devushka, if you buy this fabric softener, then you get the fairy for free. It only costs 2 extra hryvnas"
"But I don't want fabric softener. I want dishwasher fluid."
"But why just buy the Fairy? You'll get it for free with the fabric softener?'
She tried to take me back to the fabric softener aisle. She seemed absolutely adamant that I buy the damn softener.
"Why would I spent two extra hryvnas on something I have no use for?"

She finally gave in.

"Whatever you want, devushka"

*Sigh*

I really should have pulled the stupid American "I can't understand a word you're saying card." My shopping experience would have been much more pleasant.

It's amazing. Kiev seems to have gone a complete 180 from the soviet times. Marketing and advertising are everywhere you look! They have no idea how to direct it, focus it, or scale it back as needed.

The other day, Nadya bought tickets for herself me, and her mother to see the Russian language version of The Importance of Being Earnest at the Russian Drama Theater. Oscar WIlde seems to be very popular in Russia and Ukraine. I saw a fantastic production of Lady Windermere's Fan in Petersburg and absolutely adored it, and I'm fascinated by the way that Russians translate British stuffyness and high society.

This production was completely underwhelming. My first issue has nothing to do with the performance itself, but the translation. In Russian, the play translates to "Kak Vazhno Byt' Sereznym" (How important to be serious). However, the characters continue to call themselves "Earnest" (Well, Ernst. But close enough). It completely loses the play on words. There is a Russian name, Seryozha that sort of works and would retain the meaning... Although it would be wierd to have Gwedolyn, Cecily, Algernon, and Seryozha.. but still.

Now to the performance itself. The show completely missed the point of Wilde's play, which was to mock the haughtiness and overpropriety of British society. The music did the play no favors. Occasional spurts of music played on a piano in serious need of a tuning. Little melodic spurts of scales or the first few bars of a wedding march would follow bits of dialog, used the same way that comedians use a quick drum and cymbal combo to indicate a punch line.

The actors went for the overdramatic silent film school of acting. Algernon slouched around the stage like he was an extra on Friends And Cecily... Dear God I wanted to strangle Cecily. Cecily acted like a bunny rabbit on speed. The actress spend all of her time on sprinting back and forth on stage, watering imaginary plants and shrieking her lines excitedly. I don't think she stayed still for more than five seconds. There was some line about Earnest having been sent to Australia. She cupped her hands and jumped up and down like a kangaroo to illustrate her point. I don't think this is what Mr. WIlde had in mind. The director seriously needed to read a few Jane Austen novels, or at least see the movie versions of them. Because dear lord!


We decided to leave at intermission. It's not like we don't know how the play ends...

Nadya and I left musing if it was an issue of cultural misunderstanding, bad direction, or a little bit of both.

As per request,

A taste of Ukrainian fashion. I don't get it either.

I made the mistake of going to one of the Underground malls in search of a shirt.

These overlit ant tunnels where you can buy anything under the sun... except a decent solid shirt. I've decided that, at least in those malls, clothing can be divided into three categories: Frumpy, Tacky, and Hoochy (with much overlap of the last two categories). Seriously. I'd look at some of the clothes being sold.. blinding patterns and gold adornments and wonder who the hell buys that shit.

Then I see tiny little things strut past me in stilettos and skirts that barely cover their ass and realize "Oh that's who!"

It's almost impressive, really.

The aprtment we are renting is on Druzhbyi Narodiv street, friendship of the people's street. I find it at once amusing and appropriate.

Flash back to the day before yesterday. I was hungry and wanted to buy some yogurt and sausage to have around the house. I needed munchy bits. So I dropped buy a little gastronom near the Druzhbyi Narodiv train station. I was absolutely embarrased at way I studdered and resorted to hand gestures while ordering. Then the lady asked me how much cheese I wanted. I had no clue... So she cut a small piece for me, which looked about enough. This was less of a language problem and more of an I don't think in grams problem.

Shit. I thought. I'm here and speaking Russian and I can't even buy yogurt! The other issue is my accent. I don't have much of one in Russian. Therefore, when I screw up, people don't assume "Oh she's a foreigner trying to learn the language." People just assume that I'm stupid.

Then, I went out with Nadya, her brother Kostya, and Kostya's wife Masha. Masha drove us all through the center of town... They showed me the Golden Gates, the church Sofia, and the square where the Orange Revolution took place. Kostya was telling me about how he and Masha were some of the first people out there, and they were constantly scared to death of getting arrested. It wasn't until a few days later when the tent city went up, that they thought maybe they had a chance at not getting locked up. But even then, there was always the fear.

I asked them all sorts of questions about the Politics of Ukraine, what they thought about the dismissal of Parliament... Where they think Ukraine is going. The politics of Ukraine right now are absolutely fascinating... Moreso than I had even expected.

I can talk about politics in Russian till the cows come home, but I can't order yogurt. Behold the story of my life.

I have a big old crush on ____________________!

(Anonymous commenting is, as always, on. But you're not required to use it!)

Dear lord... So much to write about, and so little time that I can keep my eyes open for.

I met Nadya's older brother and his wife yesterday. They gave me the driving nickel tour of central Kiev, which is actually quite beautiful. I took my camera, but in my infinite wisdom, forgot to put my memory card in, so I only got a few pictures. Meh. I know where it is and will come back...

More about that trip later... and my adventures buying yogurt... I promise.

You know I've been griping about my not having met anyone outside of Nadya? Today, the universe decided to give me a boost.


Before I left for Kiev, my mother mentioned a Yiddish word to me.. Beshchert... meaning destined or somehow meant to be. This whole experience smacks of it. Not just today. The circumstances of my even being here in the first place. Like the universe deciding to swerve in my favor for a spell.

( Case in point, what happened to me today...Collapse )

I can't help but feel grateful. I'm grateful for all of the happy coincidences that brought me to this time and this place. I am grateful for all of the successes and all of the failures that have shaped my path, and will continue to shape the person I will become. I am right where I need to be, doing this wonderful, crazy thing, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

We just had a cable modem installed in our apartment! Go team us!

We've been needing to email files back and forth, which made going to internet cafes a royal pain in the ass.

My impressions of Kiev so far... The joy of soviet housing is that the ouskirts of town look exactly like they do in Moscow and Piter, which lends itself to some familiarity. A lot of the brands are the same here too. There is clearly some population here with money... What percentage is unkown, but when you walk down the streets, you see high end clothing stores and the like all over the place. There are also tons of sleek underground shopping malls. I got lost in one yesterday when I was trying to buy a razor. I need to reacclimate myself as to what products are sold where. Aptekas (Pharmacies) are only for vitamins. Beauty stores are for eveything else. It's a learning curve.

Yesterday, I experimented taking the metro. Nadia is very much a New York cosmopolitan, so to get into the city, we had been calling cabs to get places. To get from our house in the immediate suburbs to the center, a car costs about 20 grivna (five bucks). A train ride, on the other hand, costs 50 kopecks. There's a train stop about ten minues from our flat. I think I'll be taking the train from now on.

Again, the joys of Soviet uniformity, the metro system is the St. Petersburg system in miniature. Not quite as pretty, but it has the same semicircular ceilings and train cars... although there are television monitors mounted in each train car that flash each train stop and then show pictures of women walking down a runway in tacky dresses and sparkly underwear. Maybe its a post Soviet aesthetic thing that I just don't get.

Maybe its a metaphor for life in New Ukraine. There is money to be spent, but people don't know what to do with it yet... So, what the hell! Lets put TV monitors in train cars!

I'm still soewhat reliant on Nadia to connect with the outside world. I'm perfectly comfortable walking around and exploring on my own, but I still have no concept of orientation or how each part of the city connects to the next.

I've sent a few emails out to some contacts given to me over here... I still have yet to hear back from them. I think I'll feel a little less isolated.

Right now I'm in the apartment working on some of the material we want to put on our site. Nadia is very much concerned with branding and making our product look sleek and "cool". The idea being that we want to be the ipod of Ukrainian Test Prep. I'm a little more concerned about making sure that our product lives up to our hype. We shall see. So far the plan is to get a solid concept together and then fill in the details once we have our tag line and our site put together.

Happy Valentines day everyone.

I know it's a bit late, but if you want to leave a note, anonymous or otherwise, go to town.

Since I'm currently halfway across the world, I'm really out of the loop, ergo I yank a meme from aroraborealis. Anonymous commenting is on and IP logging is off. Tell me a secret! Tell me a not-secret! Express your maddest crush or deepest curiosity!

Happy birthday to
dietrich and dreams_of_wings and everyone else who has a birthday type thing

Ignoble Prizes at Harvard. Who wants to go with me?

*smiles winningly*

Poor

Stolen from many people...   Ask me a question.  Any question.  Strange, personal, whatever.  I will answer to the best of my ability.  All comments are screened to protect the innocent.  I will assume that you wish to remain anonymous unless you tell me otherwise.  I'll post the answers in my LJ as I get them in locked posts.

Happy birthday and soforth to minerva42 ! 

I actually had a decently pleasant experience dealing with Verizon Wireless' customer service.  They made my bill all cheaper and stuff and didn't make me want to gouge their eyes out with a spoon. 

I am in shock.

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In May I ruled Canada as a kind and benevolent dictator (700 points). Last Saturday I ruled Duluth, Minnesota as a cruel and heartless dictator (-700 points). In September harisma and I robbed a bank (-50 points). Last month I caught a purse-snatcher who stole pigfish's purse (30 points). In April I helped duncan041 across the street (6 points). Overall, I've been naughty (-14 points). For Christmas I deserve a spanking! Sincerely, Quem98

Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:

Submit your own plea to Cthulhu!

So, yeah... I've decided to do the friends only thing from here on out. If you want me to add you, drop me a comment. That's it, really.

When you see this entry on your friends list, post and quote Firefly!

 Kaylee: "Everybody's got somebody..." (wistfully) "Wash, tell me I'm pretty..."
Wash: "Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion."
Kaylee: " 'Cause I'm pretty?"
Wash: " 'Cause you're pretty."

and for good measure:
"What did you order a dead guy for?"

You are: "Which Soviet Minister Are
You?"

Just remember, in Soviet Russia the quizzes take
you!


Which Stupid Internet Meme Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I don't know if anyone remembers Really Rosie, or the Alphabet book who did where the wild things are. This is my interpretation of "Alligators all Around" as illustrated by Buffy and everybody.
Teasers:
Standard Icon taking rules apply. Please no hotlinking. Comments make me warm and fuzzy inside.
( A... Alligators all aroundCollapse )

And for things of actual interest to people...

New York was a lot of fun, although I seemed to completely miss a lot of people do to some stupidity or another, but I got to play tour guide which is my most favoratist game ever in New York city. So I got to be in the company of two very beutiful boys from the UK for a whole weekend! Granted, both of them were taken... But still it was fun. We went to a comedy club on saturday night... the one I take all of my out of town friends to... We were, unfortunately sitting in the front row. And two of the comedians made fun of my kitty shoes! One of them had me take the shoe off and show everyone how silly they were. I like my kitty shoes damnit! ... Anyway. We then closed out a nearbye bar talking with a very sweet former stripper from Florida who is now selling handbags who happened to be at the table next to us at the comedy club. She was very sweet... Dumb as a post... but very sweet. I'll post more about it later, but I need sleep now. So... night.

Icon tutorial is bad for my productivity...
Standard Icon taking rules apply.

Teasers:
( EnjoyCollapse )
Standard icon taking rules apply.

A bunch of Icons that I've made over the past few weeks:

Teaser:

( lots of buffy and some other stuffCollapse )

1 2

( The rest are hereCollapse )

Comment. Credit. You know the drill.

Since I've had way too much spare time on my hands as of late...

Teasers:

( look at the prettiesCollapse )

Usual icon taking rules apply. Comment, credit, no hotlinking, and enjoy!