Mignon Coombs Funeral

Funeral video here.

Mike's Remarks:

What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet. Shakespeare would have you believe that the name is irrelevant – a rose by any other name is still a rose. So, again, What's in a Name? Maybe Nothing.... Maybe Everything....

As many of you know, I did not join the Coombs family in the traditional manner. I arrived as a foster child at the age of 11. This presents some rather stressful challenges. As a child experiencing a second divorce of parents and being placed in a few different foster homes over the previous two years, I can tell you now, we go into survival mode. What can I do to stop the madness? How do I present myself as someone they want to keep around? How can I tell if they are being genuine in who they are and not harboring resentment for my intrusion?

Now, I may not be the first to have realized or said this, but I firmly believe it to be true. "Anyone can present themselves as someone they are not in the short term. In the long term, they will always reveal who they are."

My remarks will reflect on both Art and Mignon. For me I see them as One. While individuals and certainly not without faults, they were the perfect pair. A team that worked together with one common goal. To build family ties that bind us together. We have a profound tendency as human beings to recreate, in our own adult lives, the kinds of relationships we observed as children.

As an old school child, we were taught to never call an adult by their first name. That would be disrespectful. It was Mr. & Mrs. or Brother & Sister "so n so".

The first couple of weeks with the Coombs, I found myself always seeking out my parents in person so as not to have to call out a name that I or they might find uncomfortable. At one point, I was having very little success and resorted to calling out "Yoohoo". Yes, I can laugh at that now. Mom figured out what was going on and had a very frank conversation with me. I am certain I dont have the exact wording, but it was something like this... "You can call me Mignon, Mrs. Coombs, Sister Coombs, or mom, it doesnt matter to me, but understand, we want you to be part of our family just as if you were born to us."

I refer you back to my earlier comment about survival mode. Ok, I can do this. If I call them mom and dad, maybe it will make it true. About a year later as dad and I talked about and agreed on adoption, my first thought was would it be offensive to take on the Coombs name? Would the Rogers' think it disrespectful? I even proposed changing my middle name from Lynn to Rogers. As the adoption paper work was started, dad asked me what I wanted my name to be. My survival mode kicked in... I need to go all in... and I agree to be Michael Lynn Coombs

A couple weeks after Chrissie and I were married we were having a wedding reception in Cupertino. Chrissie parents had traveled from San Diego to be part of the reception. At some point during that time, Mom overheard me call Chrissie's dad, Sherman. She pulled me aside and chastised me for not calling him Dad as a son-in-law should. From that day forward Sherman and Lynda Gibson were now mom and dad as well. I am grateful for her counsel at that time, as they truly have earned the right to be called mom and dad by me and deserve the love that it implies and means to me.

I have had the opportunity to reconnect with my natural father and mother since I came of age. They are referred to by me as Fred and Marie. No disrespect and with love for both.

Labels are personal, very personal, for both the giver and receiver. Each can have strong emotional reactions to any changes in those labels. But I think names provide us an opportunity to show love. Everyone can call you by your first name, but only a few people can call you "Mom" or "Dad." Let me be clear, what once was done to effect "survival" I now consider a privilege.

What's in a name? Montague, Capulet. Maybe nothing… Mom, Dad. Maybe everything…

Art & Mignon, It is an honor to call you mom and dad.

Logo

Family Picture 2016

Does this thing still work?

It's been FOR-FREAKING-EVER since the blog has been updated. A new age is upon us - Mariah is driving a car and applying to college summer camps as a precursor to actual college enrollment!

Mariah dreams of a career in the fashion industry. My bet is she makes it - somehow, someway. She is applying for a scholarship to attend a fashion design camp at University of Cincinnati this summer. It's a bit pricy so we're hoping this 500 word essay hits the mark and reduces the fee.... every penny saved means another bolt of material for a pretty Little Black Dress.  The prompt was to write about something that had an significant impact in the industry (you could choose a person, an object, architecture, fashion, art, etc.). 

 

 

The Little Black Dress

            The Little Black Dress – everyone knows it. With elegant and bold simplicity, the Little Black Dress has been a fashion staple since Coco Chanel coined it in the 1920’s. The positive impact of this iconic dress is admirable. The style changed as each decade influenced fashion, but the idea remained: chic and sophisticated.  Never out of style, the Little Black Dress has influenced fashion for nearly a century.

            Making its debut in The Roaring 20’s, it wasn’t widely accepted at first. The original Little Black Dress was a pull-on frock, straight lined, calf length, a simplistic beauty designed in a time of bold prints and bold colors. However, in the Vogue issue of 1926 it was described as a dress “that all the world would wear” and they were right. While affected by the evolution of fashion, its revolution couldn’t be stopped. No longer was black worn just for mourning. Chanel said, “Women think about all colors except the absence of color. I have already said that black has it all. White too. Their beauty is absolute.” Black became a color of power and fashion. Chanel gave women confidence to challenge fashion trends and look great by going simple in a Little Black Dress.

            In the 1930’s, designers made the Little Black Dress a standard in women’s evening wear. The dress went from a gamine silhouette to one that accentuated feminine curves. In a nod to the conservative times, the hemline dropped to the calf.  Necessity changed the Little Black Dress in the 1940’s. During WWII fabric was rationed, so once again, the Little Black Dress was little. With a simple silhouette, the Little Black Dress now performed double duty as evening and day wear due to its ability to be played up or down with accessories. Post-war affluence and Hollywood brought glamor to fashion in the 1950’s. Notably worn by Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn Monroe with a full skirt and nipped waist, the Little Black Dress as predicted by Vogue, was seen everywhere, and it had yet to hit its peak.

The next decades would ensure the longevity of the Little Black Dress. In the 1960’s celebrities like Twiggy brought back a boyish silhouette with new hem heights. The Little Black Dress reached a high point in fashion. During the hippie movement of the 1970’s the chic Little Black Dress remained popular in Paris while in America, it took on a plunging neckline and thigh-high slits, and was also worn as a simple wrap dress designed by Von Furstenberg. The design of the Little Black Dress became form-fitting, sexy and short in the 1980’s; and this cut remains a classic version today. The grunge trend of the 1990’s challenged chic sophistication but paired with flannel and combat boots, the Little Black Dress adapted as always.

In this new century, it is in fashion season after season; a confidence inspiring essential in every woman’s wardrobe. Always evolving, the impact of the timeless Little Black Dress is stunning.

 

Works Cited

Alvarez, Juli. Daily Worth. 31 October 2013. 7 April 2014 .

Chanel Collections. 12 March 2010. 7 April 2014 .

Glamourdaze. 17 August 2012. 7 April 2014 .

Salvadori, Irene. Vogue. 7 April 2014 .

Plans? What Plans?!

Today is one of the first cold Monday's of the fall. The kind where you just wanna stay in bed all warm and cozy. At least it was a high school power Monday which means an extra hour of sleep.

Instead of a do-nothing day off, I had on my itinerary yet another visit from the AC company that services mom's 1 yr old unit. Honestly, it's one of those companies that make you want to pull out your hair. There should be nothing wrong with an AC unit that's a year old! Why oh why have they been out several times already? Oh wait, I know.... because they're idiots. Installation errors, call back appointments that accomplished nothing, parts ordered again, and no-shows. So today I was to hang around for a valve to be put in the AC which is now on HEAT. They will eventually put in the supposed fix-it but who knows if it works because it'll be winter! Luckily, mom says the warranty is 2 yrs. Oh goodie - another year of these bozo's getting nothing done in 3 visits or more.

So from 8-12 today I was grounded. I decided to make the most of the time by getting an early start on a crock pot roast for dinner. Then I decided to roast a bunch of veggies - especially the kohlrabi from the CSA farm share that needed to be cooked asap. Those are scary looking little things. I kept giggling thinking of Sputnik and alien life forms while chopping them. I roasted them with peppers & tomatoes because I had to use those up or toss 'em too.

While it was cooking I decided to find a recipe to use them in or I was just going to toss 'em in the roast in the crock pot.  I found an interesting Kale & Roasted Vegetable Soup recipe on simplyrecipes.com so I switched gears and started on that. I got very brave and decided to taste the roasted kohlrabi before puree-ing the whole thing. Wow! Now that was tasty. Who knew?! I kinda got excited for the soup then. I couldn't follow it exactly (mostly because my carrots & onion were already in the crock pot) but it was great! Mike came home for lunch as I was taking snickerdoodles out of the oven and had soup ready to ladle into a bowl! Score! It was so good it could have been ordered at a restaurant! Somewhere in between all that, I also cooked a pound of pasta, and hardboiled some eggs - all for use later this week. By the time all that got done and the kitchen cleaned up for the 3rd time today, the AC man missed his window of opportunity.

Too bad the AC guy didn't show up. Or answer his phone. If he had come somewhere in his 4 hr window and wasn't as big of a bozo as the last guy he might have scored a few cookies.

Now I'm going to pick Mariah up from school. She's been on quite the soup kick lately so she should be pleased with me today... IF she doesn't realize she's eating weird vegetables and beans until after the first bite. All is forgiven then.

Kale & Roasted Vegetable Soup
 - a hearty winter soup recipe with kale, white beans, and roasted veggies.

Preheat oven to 400 - brush a baking stone with olive oil. Chop into large pieces veggies to be roasted and toss in the oil then sprinkle with salt. I did kohlrabi, peppers, tomatoes. I would have done more if I'd had known before roasting what I was making. heh heh.  Roast veggies for 30-40 minutes, tossing occasionally. Puree them in a food processor. 

Put in a soup pot with the rest of the ingredients: bring to boil and simmer 30 minutes.  Note: I made about a 1/2 size recipe, loosely based on the recipe below which I'm including for you rule-followers.  While it was cooking I was making other things and decided to toss in some bow tie pasta. That's when I thought to myself (pasta fagioli?!) and served it with parma cheese. Yum!

The Real Recipe (vs. Chrissie)
3 medium carrots, peeled & quartered lengthwise  (didn't use - carrots were cooking in another dish)
2 large tomatoes, quartered (I only did 1 - would have done 2 if I'd known)
1 large onion cut into wedges (didn't roast any so I didn't use)
1/2 small butternut squash, peeled, seeded, cut lengthwise into 1/2" thick wedges (didn't have - wow what a shame)
6 garlic cloves (I used abt 3 tsp store bought minced)
1 TBSP olive oil
6 or more cups of broth (I used 2 cans of chicken broth)
4 cups of finely chopped kale (or less... I think I used about a cup. It had a pungent smell so I went with "sparingly")
3 large fresh thyme sprigs (I used dried basil leaf)
1 bay leaf
1 15oz can Great Northern white beans, drained.
*  (I used southern style which is spiced up deliciously and doesn't need to be drained).
*  (Add pasta & parmesan cheese - trust me!)

SUB!

First day of the school year that I subbed today. It was in the 4's room, where we have a new teacher. I was pretty certain it would be a bit of a hardship since her routines are not as familiar to me as the teacher's for whom I've subbed many times over the years. Also, 4's are notorious for their weird speech-habits and I pretty much have to guess at what they are saying most of the time. Luckily, I had the chance to bone up last week (haha nod to Halloween skeletons everywhere) and the extra study paid off.  I even forgot to take my preemptive ibuprofen and do not have a headache.  Now, the real test will be when I try to get up and walk after sitting down for the first time all day.  On Thursday, I get to go on the annual Pumpkin Patch field trip with 27 kids and 15 chaperones. It is supposed to rain tomorrow so we'll either get super muddy when we go or it'll be cancelled. Ya never know which it will be!

One of my favorite things to do when I sub is to surprise the teacher and go off track from the carefully laid out lesson plan for the day. Either the other teachers told on me or this gal was all like "ehhh, just have fun!" I came in to find CDs set out with a list of songs the kids like, a couple books to read, and an art project to paint 2 plates each orange to become jack-o-lanterns tomorrow. As I told my director, "I would've liked to SEE a lesson plan so I would know exactly WHAT I was disregarding!" So to surprise her, I took an informal lunch-time poll of what we thought their teacher should be for Halloween. Note: Lunch-time polls are written down on a paper plate and taped to the door. The boys' responses: a carrot (it WAS lunch); a train engineer; a beanbag, a bad guy (as opposed to what it sounded like the first time he said it - a black guy....a what?!). The girls' responses: a unicorn; a butterfly; a dragonfly; Belle or Ariel. The difference between the lovely artistic imagery that comes from the girls thoughts vs the boys looking around the room and yelling out something they see just cracks me up. Then I added my answer: a teacher. To which they all said NO!!! she already IS a teach-cho!

I was exceedingly happy to discover that one little guy dropped the word POOFY from his vocabulary after last week (or he just forgot it today) when we had a talk about how I knew he was really using poofy as a potty word and that calling a friend poof-head was still rude. Since he had been yelling poofy at the top of his lungs for a couple weeks I told him no more. I gave him a new word to use - SUPER because I knew he was a super kid who could take those inappropriate words for school and "zip it, lock it, put it in your preschool pocket". Then all the kids wanted a new word too.  I went down the line giving them words of reaffirmation (except for one little guy who we both knew WILD was the premier choice). With Super, Awesome, Brilliant, Amazing, Kind, and Wild...the last little guy holds up his hand and goes, "I'm COMPLICATED".  I am still laughing at that one!

We enjoyed our weekend because for Gib & Mariah it was Fall Break. Gib came home late Wednesday and returned Sunday afternoon. He enjoyed sleeping in his bed and playing Xbox. For added excitement Gib went to the dentist, the chiropractor, got a haircut, and got his 2nd Hep A shot! He also added a nice little message to the box I was mailing to Taryn with some halloween candy in it. Before leaving on Sunday, we loaded the car with bags of food & candy, some new clothes, and the dude's clean laundry that Grammy did for him this time. The only bummer was that the Titans played at 3pm and so the guys couldn't watch the game on TV together.

Mariah had her Fall Break with days off on Friday & Monday. That makes today feel like a Monday. Tomorrow she has to take the PLAN test so doesn't really have any classes. The entire week is just going to be odd. Mariah also spent her vacation in exciting and exotic locales such as: the doctor (Flu Shot & Hep A), the chiropractor, the dentist, and getting her hair tip-dyed blue! Amazingly enough, despite the similarities in how Gib and Mariah spent their Fall Break they did NOT visit any of the above mentioned places on the same day!

While the dude was here, Indie made arrangements for the guys to bring home her bday present: a new sofa! Now we can visit with and everyone can sit on furniture, and she can read, study, watch TV & have 2 cats settle in with her. Her little loveseat was not doing it! They all stretched out on the 7' sofa and had room to spare. Aussie has claimed the armrest on one side of the couch and Lillie gets the middle or under the sofa!

The Difference of Days

Oh what a difference a few days makes! Between one weekend and the next I'm back to nearly 100%!  My eyes are still a little red and they itch a bit, but otherwise driving went fine the past 2 days! It felt good to get out of the house. Tomorrow I return to work.

Gib has a fall break coming up so he will be home for a long weekend. Mariah will also be on fall break. Gib is off Thurs/Friday and Mariah is out of school Friday/Monday. Since Gib doesn't have classes on Friday he doesn't really have more than an extra day off, but luckily for him I filled it with exciting things like chiropractor and dentist appointments. Maybe we'll get him another haircut too while he's here!

Mariah had a brutal end of the first quarter with all sorts of big assignments due at once. It really wiped her out and when she came home last Thursday she went straight to bed. We spoke briefly later than night and she went back to sleep. Early Friday morning she was still feeling exhausted so she stayed home from school. She's doing well in school though and it's good to learn to pace yourself and that all-nighters are not as glorious as some people lead us to believe. I kind of wish her English teacher had assigned the essay for the independent reading project at the beginning of the year when she finished it. I also kind of wish he had sent the email stating a deadline had been extended BEFORE Mariah stayed up until 2 am to finish it.

I spoke to both Taryn and Gib on the phone Sunday! Considering I also spoke to Indie and Mariah in person, that was like a mini-mom's day for me! It was good to hear their voices and catch up on their lives.  Taryn is doing well, has a lot of homework! Gib is doing well, has a lot of fraternity homework! He went to two dances over the weekend - his frat dance and then her sorority dance. But he reports that there is no girlfriend. Taryn has the month of October in our family gf pool and he says no way -  no time.  Mike is hopeful that during the January explorations term he has the time. It's amazing what people will do to win bragging rights around here.  We won't get to see Taryn until November. I know she will love meeting Lillie.

I can't remember if I posted about Indie adopting a new kitten....  Taryn asked how it happened. I saw her at the pet store - she was 1 of 3 kittens rescued with their 3-legged momma. She was the only one left and had a very sad look on her face. She and I had a discussion about how I just knew she'd get a good home and not to worry. She just kept looking me straight in the eye. I thought about her all day long. Mariah and I were nearby that evening and I told her about the kitten and we went to see her. I later found out that she had actually been adopted with her brother but the people decided adding 2 kittens to their house was too much so they kept the brother and brought her back. :(  So anyway, we texted Indie while we were there that I had fallen in love with a kitten. She came and decided to think about it. Indie adopted Lillie the next evening.  Aussie loved her the very second she came out of the kitty carrier. She is very social and had no fear whatsoever. He started off right away teaching her to chase him. They have that down good now and he's working on teaching her better defensive skills. He corners her, and if he gets her down he puts a paw on her until she figures out how to get out from the pin. She doesn't like these games much. But Aussie feels it's important to have excellent wrestling skills and therefore Lillie has no choice but to be little Grasshopper.  Otherwise, they both play, play, play!!! They are both chirpers and it's fun to listen to them "talking".  Since Indie is gone for long hours it will be good for both kitties to have companions.  Aussie is having a sick day today but I don't think it's major - sure  hope not! We love that kitty!!! He had a rabies shot last week so maybe that is causing him some problems. Or maybe he ate a bad bug. Who knows. He saw the vet on Tuesday and was 100% fine so hopefully this works out in by tomorrow.