Hello! It's been literally years. Just thought I'd check in, and wondering if LJ should become once again my main blog. It is quite the archive of my life already. Thoughts, anyone?

Dropping in to see what's new. I must admit, I've missed this place a bit. Anyone want to enlighten me on spiffy new features since I last checked in, March 2013?

I recently came across a question about why the Pagan community seems to attract socially awkward people. Here’s my take on this.

There’s an “unconditional love and tolerance for all” ideal in the Pagan community at large. Our internal culture welcomes those who have been rejected by more mainstream groups. Sometimes this bites us in the butt, as people are unwilling to point out inappropriate behavior in a polite, direct manner one-on-one, early on. We tend to forget that a good percentage of newbies are coming in with some serious baggage, and we don’t allow for that transitional phase where they’re going to potentially make some big social blunders. It’s a learning curve that can be done in a positive way, yet still firmly with no wiggle room. Also, individuals can have some wildly different social boundaries of what they will tolerate or not. A newbie needs guidance on how to navigate the waters of an internal social structure that really doesn’t have a common set of boundaries.

Pagans are also notoriously more open about relationship structures; for someone coming in blind, from our generally conservative mainstream with more defined relationship rules, we’re a minefield. I believe we all should be firm as to our own personal boundaries up front, so a new person doesn’t get in a fix with all the mixed signals.

I believe that newbies entering ANY new social structure, especially religious or spiritually related, are coming into it with the idea that they want to fit in but have no idea what they’re dealing with yet. They’re going to be very self-conscious, self-judgmental, etc. Being hypersensitive about not wanting to misstep often leads to exactly that. Those of us with children understand this even more; any kid who knows they are in a situation where they need to “be on their best behavior” inevitably ends up at some point dropping/breaking something, or otherwise creating for themselves a socially embarrassing incident. It’s up to us, in the role of those comfortable with the environment, to gently but firmly help others overcome and do better while not treading on their dignity or self-respect.

This doesn’t mean that the “unconditional love and tolerance for all” is in play; if someone is truly a jerk or an actual danger to the community, it should be addressed. But it needs to be done in a way that does not end up ostracizing a good person based on personal bias. You are NOT required to like or accept everyone, even if they are in the same social community; just be astute about how you handle it.

How do we make Wicca and other Pagan religions more respected and accepted in mainstream society? What we need to do is not just kvetch about it; we need to LIVE it. Refuse to use the words "minority," "alternative" and "other" in relation to our spiritual paths. That very action says that we accept another is superior over us. Act as if we are already equal, and stop asking for validation from others as if it's a privilege that we are needing them to bestow.

The San Antonio Pagans web site has been redesigned and uploaded to our new host, A Small Orange. Here's the link: http://sanantoniopagans.us

There are a few changes to simplify things:

1. I have eliminated the "Meet the Locals" section, since my goal is to keep the web site current and most folks tend to forget they have a page up.

2. Created a few major categories on the navigation menu which will group things like Meetups, groups/orgs, discussion forums etc on dedicated pages rather than each one having a separate page. The old navigation menu was becoming very long and cumbersome. Each listing will have a brief description and link straight to the source (outside web site). Good incentive for everyone to keep their own web sites current. ;) I have only created a site page for those who do not have a web site in place.

3. iWeb provides a Blog option, so I will have that on the navigation menu for announcements, items of interest to the local Pagan community, etc. In this light, I'm going to eliminate the S.A. Pagans Twitter account because it's just duplicating efforts. Because you even knew there was a Twitter account, right? ;) This Facebook forum will remain in place.

4. There will still be a 6-months-out "Recurring Events" page for repeat items and major gatherings. PNO page will contain dates/days through 2012 and 2013.

I know many of you never thought I would say this, but I am slowly migrating my primary blogging from LiveJournal to the alternate sites of Wordpress and Blogger. Not leaving Team LJ entirely, but....

In the past year especially, I've found myself not visiting here for longer periods of time. As the Russian spam, etc problems have escalated, it's become more clear to me that I needed to find other options. Also, my blogging is not as extensive as it used to be; most of my interaction is in shorter dialogues such as Facebook. LiveJournal simply doesn't provide the wider range of reaching people that I need for my present-day Craft and Pagan community outreach activities.

I'll keep a free account here to stay in touch with my LJ friends; I don't want to lose those connections. But my paid account is history. No, I'm not interested in Dreamwidth; had one, tried it out, not for me. I have made a solemn vow to never get a Google+, so that's out as well. I'll keep a presence here, mirroring the other blogs, but this will no longer be my primary home.

Remember, each thread of a web is interconnected; we will all cross paths again in other ways. And even if I pop in here infrequently, you can always reach me through my (redesigned) web site, http://seshen.us, Facebook or the new blogs listed above.

And so, I turn in a new direction at the crossroads, towards different horizons. I hope to encounter many of you again on the new paths!

Doreen Valiente (1922-1999) rewrote Gardner's original Charge of the Goddess, and her prose version has been modified and reproduced by the Pagan community throughout the years. There's even a mirror "Charge of the God." To my knowledge, Doreen never said a thing about wishing harm to her spiritual community, or even making claim to having sole authority over her version. She understood, I'm sure, that Pagan practices evolve over time, and religious wording must do the same if needed to avoid becoming stagnant.

Intellectual property issue aside (because the argument is a murky legal nightmare), I wonder if Z. has contemplated the consequences of her adversarial approach? Doreen's legacy remains honored and respected. Z. was a pioneer in the modern Pagan movement, but as they say in the military, one "Oh Shit" can wipe out years of "Atta Boys."

For those who have no idea what I'm talking about, go here:

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/agora/2012/04/we-all-come-from-the-horned-god-possibly-but-dont-sing-it/

Next month's moon phases:

http://www.moonconnection.com/moon-january-2012.phtml

This year's Winter Solstice arrives tonight at 11:30 pm CST. Here are the 2012 Equinox, Solstice & Cross-Quarter Moments across all time zones. The charts go through 2020.

http://www.archaeoastronomy.com/2012.html

There is a photo being shared on Facebook of a lovely French model, along with a story of a gym sign disparaging women who don't meet our "culture of thin" ideal. I think this is an admirable movement, because the quality of a person should not be judged by their weight. However.... there is an ugly side of the coin I've noticed in various comments around FB, which shows that the pendulum swing of judging body image has simply switched sides for some. Just like the feminist movement, which started out with good intentions, it's become socially acceptable to put down others who don't fit the movement's message; the "before" picture, if you will.

As someone who's always struggled with GAINING weight, I find it frustrating sometimes when people tell me how "lucky" I am. Or that I don't understand body image issues because "only fat women get harassed and ridiculed." Or my personal favorite, "just eat a lot of ice cream; at least you CAN. Some of us aren't privileged." But I'm expected to just grin and accept those views, because "thin is in" and I apparently have no right to complain.

The absolute insensitivity and tunnel vision of the "REAL women have curves," in conjunction with the pointedly negative adjectives used to describe thin women in relation to that, still floors me sometimes. I have come to accept that I will never have "real curves." But I am very much a "real woman. I could vent about a lot more, but you get the point.

This is NOT directed at the women, and men, who know that I DO understand and support them, albeit from the other side of the weight spectrum. This is directed at those who cannot see that their words are just as hurtful putting people like me down, in support of THEIR ideal and against the culture of weight/beauty. Respect works both ways, folks. And that's all I wanted to say.

A sister site to my YouTube channel, devoted to public education on paganism.

http://wiccantexan.wordpress.com


Status update: There's RAIN in my area!