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“Aunt Rhoda’s Really a Lot of Fun”

TV Comedy

In 2025, I watched all of The Dick Van Dyke Show (1961-65) and its spiritual successor The Mary Tyler Moore Show (1970-77), with a chaser of Rhoda (1974-78). That’s such a concentrated burst of greatness that I feel like anything I watch this year will be a disappointment.

So while I scrabble around for something to replace the giant hole in my life – and no, spin-off Phyllis (1975-77) doesn’t quite cut it – I can at least throw myself into the usual behind-the-scenes books and documentaries. Very quickly, you learn all the standard tales which have come up over the years. And with The Mary Tyler Moore Show, one tale looms above all: the disastrous preliminary filming of the opening episode, three days before the real one.

This is probably most succinctly expressed in the book Mary and Lou and Rhoda and Ted (Simon & Schuster, 2013):

“The day of The Mary Tyler Moore Show’s first chance to perform in front of a studio audience began with news of a bomb threat on the lot… The threat was determined to be unfounded, and audience members were herded in. But the folks in the stands couldn’t see the actors over the cameras, which were twice as bulky as the standard kind, so they were forced to try to catch the action on small monitors instead. The air-conditioning broke down, so the two-hundred-member audience and the actors were left to swelter in 90-degree July temperatures while watching a practice run of a series already being promoted to viewers as if it were a done deal. The microphones didn’t work properly.”

The problems continue from there. At times, the stories about this recording take on an almost absurd tinge; everything that could have gone wrong, seemingly did. Showrunners James L. Brooks and Allan Burns did a dreadful job with the warm-up; the actors weren’t quite ready; the director hadn’t had enough time with the camera crew… the excuses just keep piling up. The dodgy aircon and sound system would surely be enough to kill a recording, let alone anything else.

And then there was Rhoda, a character which seemingly made a few people nervous. To be fair, she is set up initially as an antagonist to Mary, and spends the entire episode trying to nab her apartment. But also: never underestimate some people’s unpleasant reactions to a gobby Jewish woman.

Either way, she certainly didn’t test well with the studio audience that particular night. What to do? Back to Mary and Lou and Rhoda and Ted:

“Script supervisor Marge Mullen, who’d held the same job at The Dick Van Dyke Show, stopped by the producers’ office. She had an idea – maybe not the biggest one, but it was something. “People don’t seem to like Rhoda,” they remember her saying. “There’s this little girl who’s Phyllis’s daughter, and if the little girl likes Rhoda, it’ll give the audience the opportunity to love her, too.”

It was the only substantive idea for an improvement Brooks and Burns had heard all evening. They decided to take Mullen’s suggestion, cut a few other lines, and call it a night, putting their faith in what they’d written and the cast they’d hired. Many things had gone wrong with that first taping, but the words and the talent, they believed, were there.”

Come the second recording, three days later?

“The only major change to the script was pigtailed twelve-year-old Lisa Gerritsen as Phyllis’s daughter, Bess, saying, “Aunt Rhoda’s really a lot of fun,” as Mary opened the curtains in her new apartment to see a harried Rhoda on her balcony in the opening scene. Gerritsen was the granddaughter of child actor and later screenwriter True Eames Boardman, as well as the great-granddaughter of silent film actors, but she had now made her own showbiz history.

This time, the audience roared. Gerritsen’s new line seemed to indeed be the magic bullet.”

Unlike all the other problems with the first recording, which was a smorgasbord of failure, this at least is a nice, neat anecdote. One single line changed how the audience felt about Rhoda, Marge Mullen and Lisa Gerritsen save the day, job done.

The problem is, it’s not quite the full story.

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Everything That You Need to Know

TV Comedy

Something unexpected has happened with The Peter Serafinowicz Show over the years.

For a programme which had just eight episodes, one of which was a Best Of, and which has never been repeated by the BBC1, the show has become a fixed reference point for certain strata of comedy fans. When I first watched it back in 2007, I rather liked it, with a few reservations. In 2025, it lives rent free in my head. If you think people endlessly quoting Python are annoying, just wait until I do my Ringo Remembers. “I just thought it was inappropriate. Especially at Christmastime.

But of all the characters in the show, the one with the longest life has turned out to be inept businessman Brian Butterfield. A character inspired by this ludicrous advert, but which became something stranger and wilder almost immediately. A character which ended up going on tour fifteen years after the series was first broadcast, with all the associated paraphernalia. Who would have predicted that back in 2007?

All of which means it’s high time I wrote something interesting about it. So let’s take the second episode of the show, broadcast on the 11th October 2007, and one of the most well-remembered sketches of the lot: the Butterfield Detective Agency.

Of all the incredible moments in that sketch, my favourite might be Peter’s eye-flick upwards on “Australian”, as though Brian has just begun to realise he might have got it wrong.

But if you know this site well enough, you can probably guess where I’m about to go. What about the fabulously inappropriate music for the sketch, trying desperately to give a sense of showbiz that Brian Butterfield is incapable of providing? Well, it probably won’t surprise you to learn that it’s a library track: “Theatre Land”, credited to David Arnold2 and Paul Hart, and first released in 1991 by Carlin on the album TV/Radio/Showbiz/Logos (CAR 188).

Specifically, it’s three different versions of “Theatre Land” bunged together. All three are included below.3 I shall leave where the edit points between them are in the original sketch as an exercise for the reader.

So, job done, yes?

Not quite.

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  1. Aside from the Christmas Special, which had a repeat a couple of days later in a different edit. I’ll write about that one day. 

  2. Ah, the everlasting confusion with there being two British composers called David Arnold. One scored multiple James Bond films. The other did the themes for The Big Breakfast and Live & Kicking. We are dealing with the latter. 

  3. There are nine versions of “Theatre Land” in total on the album. 

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Dirty Feed: Best of 2025

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My plan for 2025: to not just write about comedy on here.

What actually happened in 2025: I mainly wrote about comedy on here.

Oh well.

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The Voice of Youth
The tale of Nozin’ Aroun’, one of the most well-remembered sketches in The Young Ones, and the link between Ben Elton’s time on the Oxford Road Show. By far the best thing I wrote in the whole of 2025, and one of the best things I’ve ever published since the site launched. It’s all downhill from here.

Ben Elton as Roland Tarquin

Marion from A Small Summer Party

A Slightly Larger Summer Party
How the Marion & Geoff special A Small Summer Party changed between its broadcast and DVD release. Writing about a show from 2001? That represents something new and dangerous for this site. (Don’t miss the follow-up. I really should attempt to poke Hugo Blick on all this at some point.)

An Absolutely Fabulous Pilot
This was a mystery I’d been trying to get the full details on for years, and finally managed it: what was different about the very original edit for the pilot of Absolutely Fabulous, which Gold accidentally transmitted for years. See also: the differences between the pilot script and the final programme.

Absolutely Fabulous pilot logo

Fletcher looking at two glasses on the table

“From Here?”
By far the most popular thing I wrote all year, and another thing I’ve been meaning to write about for ages: tracing the origins of Porridge‘s “What, from ‘ere?” gag… to long before Clement and La Frenais. Don’t miss the comments on this one, which takes things well beyond the actual article itself.

Insults, Cups of Tea and Quips
I’ve written an awful lot of silly things about newspaper props this year, but this is my favourite, ending up in a thoroughly unexpected place. Although this example from I’m Alan Partridge is also absolutely bizarre.

Eddie from Love Thy Neighbour reading a newspaper

The Halls from the Fawlty Towers episode Gourmet Night

Lucky Old Bin
If there’s one theme to my writing this year, it’s that I finally got the answer to loads of sitcom mysteries I’ve been pondering over the years. This is yet another one: a cut ending to the Fawlty Towers episode “Gourmet Night”, revealed at last. Kurt, you drunken dickhead.

“There Are Herrings on the Roof Again!”
To celebrate the 50th anniversary of Fawlty Towers, a look at all the various parodies of the show over the years. A little rushed in order to hit the anniversary deadline – I can’t believe I missed the point of the Michael Barrymore bit in the Shooting Stars sketch – but the tying together of so many different shows is unusual for this site, and I really should try more of it.

Harry Enfield as John Cheese-Shop-Sketch

The Major from Fawlty Towers, staring at a rat

TC8, 19th May 1979
Yet another Fawlty Towers piece for the 50th, and yet another piece I’ve been meaning to write for years: exactly what was shot on the pre-record day for “Basil the Rat”. I realised after publishing that I should have just called this “You Dirty Rat!” after Polly’s impression of Jimmy Cagney, so just pretend that’s what I did, thank you. See also: this follow-up, and this further follow-up. Like picking at a scab.

Poor Old Jackie Rae
In comparison to all the pieces I’ve planned to write for ages this year, this one came out of nowhere: exactly how accurate is Bob Monkhouse’s autobiography when it comes to The Golden Shot? And how can you prove anything one way or the other, when most editions of the show no longer exist? Again, well worth reading the comments on this one.

Jackie Rae, hosting The Golden Shot

The Dick Van Dyke Show gang watching television

“I Don’t Own a Television Machine”
After watching The Dick Van Dyke Show for the first time this year, it became my favourite sitcom ever made, leapfrogging over all the shows I’ve loved since I was a kid. I have so much I want to write about it, but this will do for a start. (If you’ve never seen the show, I can’t think of a better way of starting 2026.)

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Various Cutaways of Rat

TV Comedy

(You’ll need to have read this piece on the Fawlty Towers episode “Basil the Rat” and its two-day recording schedule, along with this short follow-up, in order to get anything out of this post. Also, fair warning: we get deep into the weeds with this one.)

Somebody recently emailed me with a reasonable enough question: where do I get all the old television scripts I use in my writing here on Dirty Feed?

You may perhaps expect me to be hanging around various libraries and archives, but for boring practical reasons, that isn’t usually the case.1 Instead, I have various other sources. Some of them are already published in books, like the Absolutely Fabulous pilot.2 Some of them are just sitting online if you know where to search, such as the pilot for Mary Tyler Moore. Some of them I simply get sent by friendly people every now and again. (Yes, I will write about that Love Thy Neighbour script one day, promise.)

Then there’s auction houses. And while I occasionally buy scripts from eBay and the like, I can’t afford to do that too often.3 But just occasionally, you get lucky. As I was when it came to Fawlty Towers, and – you’ve guessed it – “Basil the Rat”, or just “Rat”.

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  1. Oh, you want a longer explanation? Fine. I believe I’m very careful here on Dirty Feed when it comes to copyright and fair dealing. I only use extracts of copyrighted works for the purposes of criticism or review – and the stuff I do here definitely counts as that.

    However, archives are generally a bit stricter than this when you’re actually quoting material they hold, and demand that you get permission from the copyright holder. It’s a) a faff, b) you might not get permission, and c) I seriously want to make sure I don’t upset anyone and make myself persona non grata by disobeying the rules. So with a lot of my stuff, it’s ironically easier to avoid official avenues. 

  2. Though you have to be careful to figure out you’re not working from transcripts, or scripts which have been edited to take all the fun stuff out of them. 

  3. I recently had to stop myself from buying the script for an episode of long-lost Bob Monkhouse sitcom The Big Noise. I still slightly regret controlling myself. 

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“I Don’t Own a Television Machine”

TV Comedy

Every so often, when struggling to analyse what I love about a TV show, I reach for the phrase “a complete comedy”. It’s a bit of a shitty, half-arsed idea. Let me at least try to explain what the hell I mean.

Some shows are built to do very specific things. Fawlty Towers is one of the best sitcoms ever made, but it’s essentially a wind-up engine for producing farce. Something like The Young Ones might look wild and anarchic and like it could do anything… but watch how the show immediately has to retreat once it brings up the death of Rick’s parents in “Summer Holiday”. There are some places the programme simply can’t go.

Then you have shows like Hi-de-Hi!, where it feels like they can go anywhere, and do anything. One episode might be a sadistic parody of light entertainment with Ted which would make Filthy, Rich & Catflap blush, the next could be another chapter in the touching Gladys/Jeffrey near-romance, then we’re headlong into a farcial plot about illicitly screening mucky movies.

An even better example is Frasier, a show which would seemingly mould and bend itself to take any kind of comedy the writers felt like doing. Oh, you want to do Mr. Bean this week, but with Niles? No problem.

Of course, it’s not a perfect categorisation. With any show, you’ll eventually bump into its boundaries and limitations; it’s just a question of how far you can wander first. It’s also not meant to be a criticism of shows which are more limited in scope; slagging off Fawlty Towers for not being something it’s not even trying to be would be completely ludicrous.

And yet I have to admit a certain fondness for those shows where you simply don’t know what kind of comedy you’ll be getting this time round. And The Dick Van Dyke Show, which aired on CBS between 1961-66, falls squarely into this category of a “complete comedy”.

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Poor Old Jackie Rae

TV Gameshows

The Golden Shot logo

Researching a programme like The Golden Shot (1967-75) is a nightmare. As I pointed out last time, for a show which ran for hundreds of editions, vanishingly few of them actually survive. Even fewer are generally available to view. You’re left scrabbling for what you can find in old newspapers and magazines… and the odd autobiography.

Such as Bob Monkhouse’s incredible Crying With Laughter (Century, 1993), often regarded as the gold standard in celebrity memoirs. And one of the most arresting sequences in the whole book is the section where he details his thrilling takeover of The Golden Shot from first host, Jackie Rae.

“Having concluded that I was lucky not to be presenting this calamity and so suffering condemnation by press and public alike, I was puzzled when Peter1 phoned to say I was wanted as the guest star for the tenth week. The fee was insignificant and the inconvenience considerable as it meant travelling from Liverpool to Elstree and back again for my midnight jobs at Jack Murphy’s Cabaret Club in Duke Street. And who was watching ‘The Golden Shot’ now anyway? Its Saturday ratings had plunged. ‘I know, love, but it’s a chance for you to show ’em a thing or two on that set.’

I got the message.

Having made sure the set was standing, I drove out to the studio and looked it over. The guest had to fire the bow using a joystick in a glass booth. The booth looked like the one featured in a frequently seen soap commercial of the day where a man went into a phone kiosk which turned into a bathroom shower. I sought out my pals in special effects and had the booth rigged to do the same. Next, I consulted the props men and they agreed to build what I’d drawn.”

According to Bob, his guest performance went spectacularly well.

“Half an hour of the usual stuff, tedious as ever, with no audience reaction other than cued applause where required. Then I was announced and my first appearance brought a crack of laughter that registered on the Richter scale. I was dressed as a big target, the golden bullseye over my middle. The absurdity of anyone showing up at an archery contest in such an idiotic costume delighted the previously bored crowd. A fusillade of gags followed as I removed my outer costume to reveal a Tyrolean outfit in the style of William Tell, put an apple on my head and did some comic business with a curved crossbow that could shoot round corners. Then I announced that I had my own private armourer, ‘Heinz the dolt!’ A four-foot tin of Heinz Potted Shrimp was wheeled on and tiny Johnny Vyvyan climbed out, dressed as a stormtrooper with a spiked Prussian helmet and carrying a gigantic door bolt. We plunged into a fast and crazy routine in which I fired at various objects he was holding up, each of them rigged to explode when hit and shower the stone-faced little man with their contents. The laughter was just as explosive, roars of hysterical mirth and applause bursting from two hundred and fifty people who had been spending an evening starved of any semblance of fun.

When I started stuffing Johnny feet first into a large cannon, Jackie Rae must have been wondering what had hit him. Unrehearsed, he was rooted to the spot by his need to read his lines off idiot boards.

I ran into the glass booth to fire the cannon and rattled off a few funny lines while Johnny was secretly replaced by a dummy. On a signal that Johnny was out and clear, I pressed the firing button. There was a hell of a bang with confetti and red smoke, the dummy soared fifteen feet in the air and its spiked helmet stuck firmly in the bullseye.

The crowd went wild and Jack Parnell, watching the show on the screen of a TV monitor in the bandroom, waited for the din to diminish before giving his orchestra the downbeat. Precious seconds were ticking by.

Then the music from the then famous soap advert filled the air and, just as in the familiar commercial, the lighting changed to make a silhouette of me as my firing booth became a shower stall. A cascade of water hit me from above and I washed myself, working up a lather with the detergent already in my clothing.2 If an audience ever howled with laughter any longer and louder, it could only have been in comedy heaven.”

The inevitable then happened:

“On the Thursday of that week Lew [Grade] sent for Peter. ATV’s light entertainment booker Alec Fine joined the meeting and Lew told them to do a deal for me to take over as host on ‘The Golden Shot’ as soon as possible.”

All very nice. The question is: how much of it is true?

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  1. Peter Prichard, Bob’s agent. 

  2. With many thanks to Simon McLean, the advert Bob is referencing here must be this one for Lifebuoy soap, or a similar one in the same series. 

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That Which Survives

TV Gameshows

If history is written by the winners, then television history is written by the survivors. Survivors of magnetic tape or celluloid, that is. And The Golden Shot, which originally ran on ITV between 1967-75, has a frankly pitiful rate of survival.

Which means that sometimes, the only record of something you really, really want to see can be found in contemporary newspaper reports. Such as the following, published in the Daily Mirror on the 18th September 1972, under the headline “Golden Gatecrasher – Building worker takes over TV show for demo”:

“A building worker took over a top TV show yesterday.

He staged a one-man protest spectacular on ATVs “Golden Shot” while it was going out live from Birmingham.

He seized the microphone from compere Norman Vaughan just as the comedian was introducing the programme’s first contestant to the viewers.

Then the small, dark-haired gatecrasher, aged about twenty-four, shouted slogans and urged other building workers to continue their strike.

Cameras swung away from the scene, and screens were blacked out for about fifteen seconds as studio staff dashed out to hustle the unknown invader away.

Compere Vaughan quickly tried to laugh off the incident.

While the leather-jacketed protester was being led away, Vaughan joked that it must have been Jimmy Tarbuck or Charlie Drake.1

The protest is believed to have been linked to the hard line being taken by Midlands building workers opposing last Thursday’s pay settlement after the official national strike.

The gatecrasher made his entrance just two days after 100 Birmingham building workers seized control of the building employers’ headquarters in the city and occupied it for nearly two hours.

When they were finally persuaded to leave by police, the protesters promised that they had some more spectacular demonstrations planned to draw public attention to their grievances over the national pay settlement.

ATV’s general manager, Mr. Leonard Matthews, was in the studio audience yesterday.

Angrily, he ordered an investigation into how the building worker managed to get into the studio.”

One thing the above report misses out is exactly what the protester manages to say before he was taken off air; The Birmingham Post reported that he said something akin to: “Support the building workers. No work on Monday.”

The 1972 Building Workers’ Strike is far too complicated to get into here, but it’s worth pointing out that this is the strike that landed Ricky Tomlinson in jail for two years… a conviction for which he was eventually cleared in 2021. In a parallel universe, this clip from The Golden Shot is used as the introduction to every single retrospective documentary or news report about the case.

In ours, it merely exists as smudged ink, and pixellated representations of that smudged ink. And there are a million such moments.


  1. I know Vaughan gets slated for his time on The Golden Shot, with Monkhouse memorably saying in his autobiography that he took to the show “like a cat to water”, but this sounds very funny. 

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“What Can They Do, Fire Me?”

TV Gameshows

If you’re the kind of person who reads this site, it’s very likely that you have childhood memories of Bob Monkhouse. Mine? Definitely his Central game shows of the 1990s, such as The $64,000 Question and the revival of Celebrity Squares.1 Oh, and my Mum ringing up the BBC after an appearance on Have I Got News For You, to complain he had been racist against the French.

As I got older, I followed the general trend of many comedy fans, in my reassessment of Bob from “that nice man on the telly”, to “one of the funniest men who ever lived”. And once you heard about his vast film and television archive and realise he was one of us into the bargain – except also doing that better and more comprehensively than virtually anybody else as well – that’s when the awe really began to set in. I choose to believe he might even have enjoyed reading Dirty Feed, and you can’t prove otherwise, leave me alone.

It was apparent years before if you were paying attention, but I can trace my realisation of Bob as an archive fiend to the documentary The Secret Life of Bob Monkhouse, first broadcast on BBC Four on 3rd January 2011. And one of the most fascinating parts of that documentary was the section on Bob’s sacking from The Golden Shot in 1972, including clips of his final show2, from a copy taken from Bob’s archive. I could watch it endlessly.

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  1. Years which were unfairly and pointlessly maligned in the 2015 Gold documentary Bob Monkhouse: Million Joke Man

  2. Before his return in 1974, of course. 

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Zodiac and Co.

Other TV / TV Comedy

This week, I have watched two things from 1977. One was The Spy Who Loved Me. The other was a mostly-forgotten BBC South West regional programme called Zodiac and Co. You will be unsurprised to hear I have more to say about one of those things than the other.

Zodiac and Co., best described as an astrological What’s My Line?, was presented by Jan Leeming. Her fantastic autobiography1, Addicted to Love (Robson Books, 2003) gives a good account of the series:

“I’d been approached by Bryan Skilton, a colleague from my BBC Bristol days, and asked to front a new series of programmes to be recorded in Plymouth. Zodiac and Co.2 had an interesting format. Very often with a new idea, a series will have a local showing. Then, if it is successful, it might go nationwide. This was the hope with Zodiac. However, to begin with, it was only for transmission in the West Country and our guests had to either live in the area or have an association with it.

The programme comprised a team of an astrologer, a graphologist, and a palmist. Julia Parker, whom I knew well from Women Only, was our astrologist. In advance of the programme, she would be given the guest’s birth date, time and place; Albert Hughes, the graphologist, would receive a sample of handwriting, and Lori Reid, our palmist, got a palm print. The three team members would have to reduce their deductions to one and a half minutes on camera, in which they delivered their findings about the guest. The guest would remain in a room hidden away from the panel, but a camera would record their reactions, which were shown to the audience at home. After the prognostications, the guest would join me and the team to discuss the findings.”

All very interesting. Not least because Jan Leeming has just taught me the word “prognostications”.

But there’s a particular reason why the show is of interest to us here, and it’s related to the one complete edition of the programme available on YouTube. For those of you who want to experience the complete programme as you might have done back in 1977, I’ll only give away the identity of the guest in the second half of the show after the cut.

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  1. It really is worth reading, by the way. Anecdotes like this are typical, regarding her attack by strangers at TV Centre in 1987:

    “There was a lot of discussion about security at the BBC. Actually in my opinion it was a joke. At the front of Television Centre it is like Fort Knox… but at the back of the building it was a leaky sieve. All my assailants had to do was shin over the iron railings and get in through the scene dock, or the Outside Broadcast Bay, where the cars were constantly coming and going.” 

  2. You will be unsurprised to hear that this programme has many permutations when it comes to the title. Despite the logo of the programme itself not including the full stop, I’ve decided to go with the format that Jan herself uses here, which was also mostly used in contemporary publications. 

Basil the Rat Redux

TV Comedy

Last time, we talked about how “Basil the Rat” was unique among Fawlty Towers episodes, in that it had two days in the studio. But there is another thing which makes it unique: the episode was also shot in front of two separate studio audiences.

Both of these audience sessions were on the second day of recording: the 20th May 1979. A matinee, followed by the evening performance. Bob Spiers gives full details on the DVD commentary:

“I think we were able to actually get it together by something like 4 o’clock on the second day, and consequently we showed this I think to two audiences, which gave the actors to really play two separate performances, which they were delighted to do. So I think mainly this is the second performance, but again we used bits of both performances.

I don’t think any actor would turn that down. They know the first performance is like a proper dress rehearsal with an audience, so they can sense the timing and can sense where the laughs are coming.”

Note that the above is different to the famous example of dinnerladies, which was also recorded in front of two separate audiences. But dinnerladies had one audience recording on the first day in the studio, and then the other audience recording on the second day, which gave Victoria Wood a chance to rewrite parts of the script based on the audience reaction of the first recording. “Basil the Rat” did both one after the other. Well, with a dinner break in-between.

It’s a point which is worth hammering home: “Basil the Rat” having two days in the studio had many advantages, rather than simply being useful for recording live rodents. The gang got both extra time for rehearsing the main show, and two bites of the cherry into the bargain.

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Bob states above that while most of the episode was taken from the second recording, a few moments were taken from the first. The obvious question is: which ones?

Oh, how I’d love to write that article. I’m sorry to disappoint you. Details of that are lost to the mists of time, and I doubt even the darkest depths of Caversham could shed light on it. If I had a time machine, I’d spend most of my life going through Bob Spiers’ bins.

Also lost to the mists of time are the studio tapes of both performances. Very little unbroadcast footage of Fawlty Towers is known to exist; the bloopers ripped from the Christmas tapes are about your lot. Sure, in an ideal world, the BBC would have been aware that they were making something so special, that they should save every last scrap of material recorded for the series for posterity. But my brain is corrupted by years of DVD extras, and it’s unreasonable to expect the Beeb in 1979 to share my stupid brain. They were too busy making the next piece of great television.

But just imagine. “Basil the Rat” is one of the best half-hours of sitcom ever made. And for an indeterminate period of time, there existed two complete versions of the episode… just played in a slightly different way. All the same lines, all the same beats. Like a version of the episode which slipped in through a wormhole from a parallel universe. I’m imagining the DVD menu. “Basil the Rat: Alternative Version”.

Tell you what, though: considering the raw footage dragged up for the Gold documentary in 2018, I bet you could do it for dinnerladies. And that would have the added interest of seeing all of Victoria’s rewrites. Someone commission me, quick.

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